One Day, A Gangster… Chapter 14

A van stopped in front of a cargo warehouse located near a reservoir in Namyangju. Joo Taesung’s men dragged Wooyoon out of the van as soon as the door opened and shoved him into the dimly lit warehouse. As Wooyoon entered the 3000-square-foot interior, rough-looking alphas who had been waiting for Joo Taesung bowed their heads in greeting.

Wooyoon had to kneel on the hard cement floor while Joo Taesung gave instructions and talked to them. Joo Taesung and his men didn’t tie Wooyoon’s arms or legs, yet they didn’t seem wary of his movements at all. They seemed to think they could subdue him if he resisted, or that he didn’t have the guts to run away. Or maybe both.

Either way, they were right. Even though his hands and feet weren’t bound, his legs felt weak, perhaps from shock.

Scratching his dry, stinging cheeks, Wooyoon quietly straightened his kneeling legs and sat down. He suddenly remembered waiting for Pilsung at the police station. It wasn’t much different from when he was crying, anxious that Pilsung, like his brother, would abandon him. The difference was that they had become lovers and had sex, but it felt like they had grown further apart.

I miss him…. I just miss Baek Pilsung so much….

Sniffling his wet nose from the trickling tears, Wooyoon looked around the warehouse. He didn’t know exactly how many hours had passed, but he could guess that quite a bit of time had elapsed, judging by how the men who had initially stood in line behind Joo Taesung at the steel desk had now relaxed their postures.

Joo Taesung, who was sitting with his legs crossed and smoking, slammed his hand on the desk.

“Why isn’t that bastard here yet?”

His panting breaths could be heard all the way to Wooyoon’s corner of the warehouse, indicating he was furious. Joo Taesung snatched a phone from a man standing next to him and made a call. Then he yelled.

“You fucking bastard! It takes forever to get from Seoul to Namyangju! Aren’t you scared? You son of a bitch, I’ll fuck you! What, you bastard? Director Baek, where the hell do you think you are slacking off!”

Wooyoon’s small face crumpled as he listened.

He must be saying that Baek Pilsung isn’t coming….

Wooyoon followed Joo Taesung with his eyes as he cursed into the phone and stormed out of the warehouse. Bright light briefly spilled in through the open door, then the warehouse became dim again as the door closed.

With Joo Taesung gone, his men relaxed, sighing and gathering in small groups. Three or four of them glanced at Wooyoon before slowly approaching.

“Shouldn’t we tie him up?”

“Well….”

The men exchanged a few more words about whether or not to tie up the hostage, then sat around Wooyoon. Wooyoon’s eyes darted around nervously as the men debated around him.

“Get some rope. Here, let’s tie him up like this.”

The man crouching behind Wooyoon suddenly slipped his hands under Wooyoon’s armpits. Wooyoon flinched and turned around, shuddering, and the men around him burst into laughter. The man who had touched Wooyoon’s armpits brought his hand to his nose and sniffed.

“Damn, he’s pretty.”

The leering gaze, accompanied by the smell of pheromones released from fear, was disgusting. Wooyoon suddenly felt nauseous and covered his mouth. It felt like all his internal organs were twisting. As he gagged and made pained noises, the men exchanged unpleasant glances and laughed again.

Even after Joo Taesung returned to the warehouse, the men continued to watch Wooyoon, occasionally touching him when Joo Taesung wasn’t looking. They would suddenly grab the back of his neck, squeeze his arm or side, or poke the inside of his thigh with the toe of their shoes. Wooyoon curled up as much as possible to avoid their unwanted touches and waited for Pilsung.

Wooyoon, who had been sitting motionless with his head in his arms for a while, sensed a sudden commotion and looked up.

“Hey! Move it!”

“Over here!”

Joo Taesung’s men were standing in a group, each holding wooden sticks and metal pipes that had appeared from nowhere. Joo Taesung, emerging from among the men, yawned and strode toward Wooyoon.

“Baby. It seems Pilsung doesn’t cherish you that much. Damn, what time is it?”

“Ugh…!”

A large hand grabbed the back of his neck. Joo Taesung dragged Wooyoon along before he could even put strength into his legs to stand up. Unable to stand, Wooyoon’s body was dragged roughly across the cement floor.

Joo Taesung dragged Wooyoon to where the men were standing, then tossed him aside like a piece of luggage and shouted.

“Open the door!”

The heavy metal door of the warehouse slowly opened. Wooyoon curled his toes on his one bare foot and looked at the warehouse door, where light was spilling in. It seemed like it was already sunset, as the outside was tinged with a reddish hue. And several black cars were driving into the open space in front of the warehouse against the backdrop of the sunset. Wooyoon, momentarily forgetting his predicament as a hostage, gaped at the spectacle he had never seen before.

The sedan in the lead stopped right in front of the warehouse door. As soon as the car stopped, the driver’s side door flung open. It was Pilsung, the person Wooyoon had been waiting for.

Pilsung got out of the car with a fierce frown on his face and went straight to the rear of the car. He opened the trunk wide and pulled something out, hoisting it onto his shoulder. The figure, whose hands were tied behind his back and dangling limply, was Heejae.

Wooyoon, crouched at Joo Taesung’s feet, flinched as he alternately looked at Pilsung and Heejae’s faces. He wanted to run to Pilsung, but perhaps due to the extreme tension he had been under for hours, or perhaps due to the scent of alphas filling the warehouse, his body wouldn’t obey. It was heavy, as if someone was pulling on his feet.

“Pil… Pilsung……”

He called out his name longingly, his voice cracking. Pilsung, walking alone into the warehouse, ignoring the cars lined up outside, put down Heejae, whom he had been carrying on his shoulder, and faced Joo Taesung.

“……”

Pilsung, frowning and glaring at the unwelcome face, briefly glanced down to check Wooyoon’s condition at Joo Taesung’s feet. He quickly checked if Wooyoon was injured, if his clothes were properly on, and struggled to control the burning anger in his chest and throat.

Ever since he received the call about Wooyoon being kidnapped by Joo Taesung, he had been gritting his teeth to maintain his composure. Even if his alpha nature gave him a fiery temper, he had to use his head when it came to business dealings or fights involving the survival of his organization. If Pilsung had acted impulsively like the local thugs who appeared with bravado and disappeared without a trace, he wouldn’t have been able to maintain his life, his business, or his organization to this extent.

Moreover, this matter involved Wooyoon’s safety. Not only could he not afford to show any weakness to his opponent, but he had to resolve it decisively without any repercussions.

Pilsung, with one hand on his hip, smiled without relaxing his furrowed brow.

“You look pretty good, considering you’ve been on the run.”

“Oh, I had a rough time smuggling myself out. Terrible seasickness.”

Pilsung’s thick eyebrows twitched at Joo Taesung’s joke.

“Then why the fuck did you add a goddamn premium to someone else’s drugs and sell them?”

“Director Baek, you fucking bastard. Back when you were begging under me…”

“Oh, cut it out. Take this.”

Pilsung waved his hand dismissively and kicked Heejae, who was kneeling, in the back. Heejae, who had been hanging his head so his face couldn’t be seen, fell to the floor limply.

“Nam Wooyoon, come here.”

He spoke in as indifferent a voice as possible, mindful of Joo Taesung. Wooyoon, who had been staring blankly at Pilsung, awkwardly stood up with his weak legs. Just then, Joo Taesung, biting his lower lip as he looked at Heejae lying on the floor, grabbed Wooyoon by the hair.

“Ugh!”

“Fuck!”

Finally, the suppressed anger exploded. Pilsung’s neck flushed red with rage. Seeing Pilsung glaring at him as if he were about to pounce, Joo Taesung tightened his grip on Wooyoon’s hair and laughed.

“You shouldn’t treat someone else’s dog carelessly. Heejae, come here.”

Heejae, lying face down on the floor, stirred and got up at Joo Taesung’s call. Heejae’s face was flushed and sweaty from being tied up in the trunk for a long time. Heejae’s eyes were lifeless, having endured a difficult time in Incheon before being suddenly crammed into the trunk and brought to Namyangju.

Numerous eyes in the warehouse silently followed Heejae as he stumbled towards Joo Taesung, his upper body twisted with his arms tied behind his back.

Just as Heejae, taking mincing steps, arrived in front of Joo Taesung and raised his gaze from the floor, the hand holding Wooyoon’s hair slapped Heejae’s cheek. Heejae collapsed to the floor from the impact.

“You idiot! Couldn’t even handle a boat properly and caused all this trouble? If I think about the investments I lost in China because of you, fuck…!”

Joo Taesung grabbed Heejae by the collar and yanked him up, raising his hand to strike him again. Wooyoon, witnessing the violence directed at his brother right in front of him, involuntarily clung to Joo Taesung’s arm.

“Uh, ugh…”

Unable to even speak, he clung to Joo Taesung’s arm with all his might, as if to stop him. Pilsung, who had taken a step towards Wooyoon but hesitated, glanced at the cars parked outside the warehouse and beckoned Wooyoon with an annoyed expression.

“Nam Wooyoon, just come here.”

“Hyung sob…”

Joo Taesung, with Wooyoon still clinging to his arm, swung his arm. Wooyoon fell to the floor along with Heejae, who had been slapped. Wooyoon, sprawled next to Heejae, checked on his brother as soon as he sat up.

“Hyung! Are you okay… Hyung…?”

“Hee…”

Heejae, whose cheek had quickly swelled red, was grinning. Wooyoon stared at Heejae, who maintained his smile despite the tears streaming down his face, with a strange feeling.

— Our Heejae was so pretty because he didn’t cry…

Remembering what Joo Taesung had said in the car, Wooyoon grimaced and clenched his fists. Pushing himself up from the floor with his tightly clenched fists, Wooyoon lunged at Joo Taesung. At that moment, Pilsung ran and grabbed Wooyoon’s arm. Pilsung quickly pushed Wooyoon behind him and immediately threw a punch at Joo Taesung.

The punch, poorly aimed because of his haste to pull Wooyoon away, grazed Joo Taesung’s jaw and missed. However, Pilsung didn’t stop there, using the momentum of his shifted center of gravity to spin his body. Pilsung’s shoe struck Joo Taesung hard under his chin.

Joo Taesung stumbled and his men caught him. At the same time, the men standing behind Joo Taesung charged at Pilsung, brandishing their weapons.

In response to Pilsung’s action, which ignited the fuse by breaking the promise to act only after the hostage’s safety was secured, the doors of the cars parked outside the warehouse opened one by one. The police officers who had been watching the situation from their cars, waiting for Pilsung’s signal, hurriedly got out.

Instead of bringing his office men and engaging in a brawl, he had reported Joo Taesung’s location, who was wanted in China. It was appropriate both for Wooyoon’s safety and as revenge for Joo Taesung encroaching on his business.

Most of the office men, including Gidong, opposed Pilsung’s decision, saying they couldn’t just hand over Joo Taesung, who had stabbed their youngest, Park Cheolhui, and orchestrated Wooyoon’s kidnapping, to the police. However, Pilsung judged that borrowing the police’s hand was the cleanest solution in this case.

The police who rushed into the warehouse clashed with Joo Taesung’s men. Pilsung and Joo Taesung also exchanged blows. Wooyoon, standing frozen amidst the warehouse that had quickly become a chaotic mess of shouts, approached his brother, who was still sitting on the floor.

“Hoo…”

Wooyoon, approaching Heejae who was precariously sitting amidst men brandishing weapons and grappling, covered his nose with one arm. His vision swam and his hands and feet trembled due to the mixed pheromone scents emanating from multiple sources. He had to get out of the warehouse quickly. He was worried about Pilsung, but judging by the taser guns strapped to the waists of the men who came with Pilsung, they seemed to be all police officers. He felt there was nothing he could do for Pilsung in this chaotic situation.

Wooyoon untied Heejae’s bound arms and said.

“Hyung let’s go. Let’s get out of here and to safety…”

“Get lost!”

As soon as his arms were freed, Heejae turned around and roughly pushed Wooyoon’s hand away. Wooyoon sensed a chilling hostility in his brother’s face as he made eye contact with him for the first time in a long while. He was much thinner than the last time he saw him, making him look unfamiliar, but more importantly, the look in his eyes, which always used to be filled with disdain, had changed. Heejae’s eyes now held unconcealed hatred, no longer veiled by mere contempt.

“You ruined everything! You ruined my last chance to follow Joo Taesung!!”

Heejae, screaming with rage, lunged at Wooyoon. He grabbed Wooyoon by the collar with both hands, which were covered in leather gloves at Pilsung’s order to hide his missing finger. Wooyoon, falling backward from Heejae’s weight, looked up at his brother, who was now straddling him and pressing down on his chest, with a shocked expression.

“Ugh! Brother…, why are you doing this…?”

“Why are you interfering with my life like this…!”

He glared at Wooyoon with blazing eyes, as if he wanted to kill him, yet he questioned Wooyoon accusingly.

“Don’t look at me like that, damn it…! Do you think I wanted to take care of you? I’m an orphan and I’m just as miserable… Why are you the only one, only you…”

Heejae muttered in a resentful voice and put his weight on the arm pressing on Wooyoon’s neck, applying more force.

“Ugh…, b, brother… I can’t breathe…, gasp!”

“You get discriminated against because you’re an omega? So you’re unhappy? Pitiful? I was discriminated against and unhappy too!”

“Gasp…”

“Poor people get looked down upon everywhere. Secondary gender doesn’t matter. I had to give up everything because of you, but damn it, why are you the only one acting pitiful! I too, damn it, I too… had a life I wanted to live!”

Wooyoon’s feet thrashed against the floor as he struggled against his brother’s arm around his throat. He gasped in pain from the tightening grip. If it weren’t for his throat being choked, would he have blurted out everything he wanted to say?

He wasn’t acting pitiful. It was his brother who made him miserable. He isolated him, confined him. Wooyoon could have helped his struggling brother, but he wasn’t even given the chance. He was left as a pathetic fool. Why?

Because he was a useless omega?

He used to think that way. That his life was worthless, a parasite. That he was only a burden to his brother, so he had to obey his brother’s orders, follow his every word. But living with Pilsung made him realize that the world his brother had shown him was all wrong.

As long as he took his medication, heats and contact with alphas were fine. Just one suppressant from the pharmacy. He could work too. He was capable of earning money on his own. Did he have to stay home because he couldn’t risk being discovered for illegally not registering his secondary gender? That he could go to jail if caught? Of course, Baek Pilsung had paid a large amount of taxes and fines, but even if he hadn’t, there was no talk of being arrested. Even the fines could be paid in installments. It was all done with a few pieces of paper, so why did his brother lie to him for so long? Why did he turn him into a helpless fool?

Wooyoon felt a hot lump rising in his throat. The question he had been wondering about every moment since his brother left him in that dark single room with an envelope containing three months’ worth of living expenses, since learning the truth about his brother, until their reunion now, was pushing its way up his tear-filled throat.

“Ugh, uh…”

He raised his trembling hand, affected by the pheromones. Gripping Heejae’s clothes with all his might, Wooyoon twisted his body with a scream. He rolled on the floor with Heejae, flipping their positions. Wooyoon, now on top of Heejae, pinned his shoulders down with both arms to prevent him from getting up, and fired off the question he had resolved to ask Heejae when they met again, his voice laced with resentment.

“Why!! Why did you do that!”

Tears streamed down his face.

“You said you were struggling alone, so why didn’t you tell me the truth? Sob, why did you lie to me?”

“Ugh, get off!”

“You said you gave up everything because of me? You locked me up at home and you…! You went to college!”

“….!”

Heejae, who had been struggling, glared at Wooyoon with cold eyes. Wooyoon tightened his grip on Heejae’s shoulders.

“Why didn’t you buy me medicine…? It’s not that expensive…. Why did you lie and say you couldn’t afford it?”

“……”

“Every time I had a heat, I wanted to die in that closet…, hoo, but I endured it… because I only received help from you…, I had to live to be of help to you, that, sob, that’s what I thought…”

“……”

“But you… you were drinking and getting into debt everywhere…. hanging out with weird alphas…. and yet you keep blaming me…”

His tear-stained face looked down at Heejae with resentment.

“We could have earned money together…”

“….!”

“Why did you have to make me a fool who knows nothing, why…! Why did you lie? Why did you do that to me, your family?”

“Ugh! Fuck!!”

Heejae, twisting his body, grabbed Wooyoon’s throat with the hands that had been gripping his collar. Startled by the choking grip, Wooyoon turned his head to escape, but thanks to the leather gloves, Heejae’s hands didn’t slip and held his throat firmly.

“Family? Ugh, you’re asking why I did it because we’re family?”

“Gasp!”

“Was I always like this? Tell me, Nam Wooyoon. You know.”

“Ugh, ugh!”

“Why did I change like this? Fuck, why are you still the same!”

Heejae’s wide eyes trembled.

Responsibility. Everything started from there. The moment he was left in the world with his seven-year-old younger brother, all that remained for Heejae was responsibility. He had to fulfill his responsibilities without having the time to feel resentment or longing for his deceased parents.

To avoid being victimized, he had to strike first. He had to ignore those weaker than him and grovel before those stronger than him to survive.

Nam Wooyoon, who received his protection because he was an omega. Nam Wooyoon, free from responsibility. Unlike himself, who had become a foul-mouthed, twisted human being through all kinds of hardships, Nam Wooyoon remained kind and innocent, Nam Wooyoon, Nam Wooyoon, Nam Wooyoon…!

Heejae grew to hate everything about Wooyoon.

“You caught Baek Pilsung and changed your life. But why won’t you let me do the same?”

“Gasp… Ugh…!”

“Do you know how much humiliation I endured from Joo Taesung…? For the future, I endured it all for that…!”

Wooyoon’s face, flushed red, gasped and choked as Heejae’s hands tightened around his throat. But Heejae didn’t stop choking him with all his might, his whole body trembling.

“What’s so pitiful about you? What’s so unfortunate! I’m the one who deserves compensation…!”

“Ugh, gasp…”

Wooyoon’s body shuddered as he scratched at Heejae’s hands gripping his throat. Fingernail marks were left on the leather gloves. Wooyoon’s eyes slowly rolled back as he stared at Heejae, whose face was contorted with the effort of choking him. His vision darkened.

“Nam Wooyoon!”

Pilsung yelled Wooyoon’s name, twisted Joo Taesung’s arm, throwing him aside, and ran to Wooyoon. He kicked Heejae, who was choking Wooyoon on the floor, in the side and scooped Wooyoon up in his arms.

“Gasp, ha…!”

“Nam Wooyoon, are you okay?”

Pilsung sat Wooyoon down and checked his complexion as he gasped for breath. The redness that had flooded his face quickly subsided.

“Ha…. Fuck….”

Pilsung let out a shaky sigh of relief and pulled Wooyoon’s small head to his chest, holding him close. Wooyoon blinked his tear-filled eyes and buried his face in Pilsung’s chest, a familiar comfort he hadn’t felt in a long time.

“…….”

Wooyoon, his face buried in Pilsung’s chest, which was heaving from the strenuous fight with Joo Taesung, raised his head. He sniffled as he looked up at Pilsung.

Pilsung smelled different. The scent was a complex mix of uncontrollable anger, regret, and distress – not something picked up from other alphas, but pheromones Pilsung himself was emitting.

• That beta-pretending pervert bastard, still the same.

“Pilsung…?”

Wooyoon looked at Pilsung with confused eyes and unconsciously brought a hand to his nose. Seeing Wooyoon cover his nose with the back of his hand, Pilsung realized the pheromones he was releasing and was about to say something when a sharp blade sliced into his shoulder and back in quick succession.

Reflexively shielding Wooyoon with his body, Pilsung rolled away. The smell of pheromones intensified, mixed with the pungent stench of blood. Wooyoon, lifting himself from Pilsung’s embrace, touched Pilsung’s shoulder. Bright red blood stained the black suit jacket.

“Blood… blood…”

“It’s okay, get out of the warehouse.”

“…….”

“Wooyoon, hurry.”

Hearing the low, firm voice, Wooyoon clenched his blood-stained hand into a fist and awkwardly stood up. His trembling legs barely moved, and he stumbled a few times before finally taking a step. He hesitated briefly in front of Heejae, who was curled up on the floor, clutching his stomach where Pilsung had kicked him, but he clenched his teeth and walked past.

Pilsung, watching Wooyoon’s retreating figure, sensed another arm reaching for his back and quickly grabbed it. He twisted the arm, spun around, and pinned the attacker to the floor with one hand. A knife clattered to the ground. He kicked the knife away with his foot and checked the attacker’s face. It wasn’t Joo Taesung, but one of his men. Without hesitation, Pilsung grabbed the man’s shoulder and twisted.

“Aaargh!”

A loud scream accompanied the sickening crunch of dislocating bone. He left the incapacitated man and just as he stood up, another one lunged at him, swinging a metal pipe.

Glancing at Wooyoon, who had almost reached the warehouse entrance, Pilsung quickly dodged the pipe aimed at his head, grabbed the man’s neck, and brought his knee up hard into the man’s face. He yanked the man’s head back, revealing a face covered in blood from his nose and chin. He coughed and Pilsung quickly punched him repeatedly in the face.

The warehouse, filled with screams, groans, and the sounds of blows, fell silent after a police officer fired a warning shot into the air with a five-shot revolver. Hearing the gunshot, Joo Taesung’s men stopped moving and put their hands on their heads in surrender.

Pilsung, who had been mercilessly beating a man’s stomach with a metal pipe, tossed the pipe aside and ran across the warehouse.

As he stumbled out of the warehouse, gasping for air, a chilling wind swept across his neck. He slowly scanned the black cars parked in the open space and roared.

“Nam Wooyoon!”

Wooyoon, who had gone outside the warehouse, was nowhere to be seen. Pilsung ran between the haphazardly parked cars, peering through the windshields. But Wooyoon was gone.

“Fuck, where did he go… Nam Wooyoon!”

He called Wooyoon’s name again, and he heard the voices of police officers searching for Joo Taesung, who had also disappeared from the warehouse.

A black sedan parked behind the warehouse shook violently. Inside, Joo Taesung, holding Wooyoon down on the back seat with one arm pressing against his temple, wiped his bleeding nose with the back of his hand and muttered.

“Fuck…. A gangster has his pride. Ratting out a colleague to the cops? That Baek Pilsung bastard is messing with me like this?”

“Ugh!”

“There are rules in the gangster world, baby. Your lover just broke the rules. Damn, what kind of gangster brings cops to a deal?”

Joo Taesung, breathing heavily with an agitated face, slapped Wooyoon’s cheek. A streak of blood appeared on the pale skin.

“Ha, this fucking hurts.”

The arm holding down Wooyoon’s head was twisted at an unnatural angle. Pilsung’s work. Joo Taesung grimaced as he looked at the bone protruding from his arm and fumbled for the console box between the driver’s and passenger’s seats with his one good hand.

“I have plenty of people looking for me in China anyway, ha…. At this point, I don’t mind spending some time in jail. It’s the death penalty if I’m caught in China.”

“Ugh!”

“In Korea, fuck, I’ll be out soon.”

His bloody hand retrieved a leather wallet from the console box. Wooyoon, completely pinned down by Joo Taesung, could only move his eyes. He had been spotted by Joo Taesung as soon as he left the warehouse. Bad timing. Joo Taesung, injured in one arm and leg, seemed to have changed his mind upon seeing Wooyoon. He easily subdued Wooyoon, despite his own injuries, thanks to his alpha pheromones.

Joo Taesung opened the wallet with his teeth and pulled out a hypodermic needle.

“Still, the name Joo Taesung carries weight. I need to teach Baek Pilsung a lesson before I go.”

The long needle pointed towards the pheromone gland behind Wooyoon’s ear. Wooyoon squeezed his eyes shut and struggled violently.

“Ugh! Don’t, don’t do it!”

“Baek Pilsung will cherish you even more. That bastard loves broken things, doesn’t he? I’ll break you beautifully.”

As the thin needle pierced his skin and the clear liquid in the syringe diminished, Wooyoon’s eyes widened. Thump, thump, thump, thump. His vision flashed white and his heart rate spiked.

“Uh… uh…”

As if he had forgotten how to blink, Wooyoon stared wide-eyed, his breath coming in shallow gasps between his teeth. Joo Taesung dropped the empty syringe and took out a new one from the wallet. He aimed it again at the spot behind Wooyoon’s ear, where the needle mark was still red.

“I taught him since he was begging under me, not to develop useless empathy like some beta…”

“Ah…. Aah…”

“He’s a bastard who’s desperate to pretend to be a beta, so he’ll be thrilled to see his own dog broken.”

After injecting Wooyoon with the second drug, Joo Taesung let out a twisted chuckle and licked the injection mark behind Wooyoon’s ear. Satisfied with Wooyoon’s unresponsive trembling, even after being licked several times, Joo Taesung opened the car door and got out.

Police officers, who had followed his trail to the back of the warehouse, aimed tasers and guns at him. Joo Taesung raised his hands above his head, signaling his surrender. Pilsung, pushing through the officers arresting Joo Taesung, rushed to check on Wooyoon lying in the car.

“Nam Wooyoon! Wooyoon!”

“Uh… ugh, uh…”

Pilsung lifted Wooyoon, who was drooling and barely breathing, out of the car and yelled for an ambulance. His shouts mingled with the police radio chatter and pained groans coming from the warehouse. Soon, sirens wailed sharply through the darkening sky of Namyangju.

Because the Namyangju hospital didn’t handle pheromone-related treatments, they had to drive all the way to Seoul with Wooyoon, whose body was rigid and trembling. Even after arriving in Seoul and being given a sedative in the emergency room, Wooyoon’s fever didn’t break. His dilated pupils remained the same.

Pilsung, anxiously rubbing Wooyoon’s sweaty forehead while a nurse checked the IV drip, asked with dry lips, “Why… why isn’t he regaining consciousness?”

“We’re administering fluids to help flush out the drug. His current state might be distressing for you, but he’s not in danger, so the doctor said not to worry too much. He said this state, with the irregular pheromone production, will likely last for a day or two until it normalizes.”

“So… you’re saying he’ll be like this for two more days?” Pilsung asked, his eyes hardening. The nurse took a step back, wary of the large alpha, and answered Pilsung and Gidong.

“Both of you are alphas, right? Alpha pheromones can help stabilize the patient. Since the hospital doesn’t legally provide direct pheromone therapy except in emergencies, you’ll have to administer it personally if needed.”

“So the hospital won’t do anything more than this…?”

The nurse interrupted Gidong, who was repeating the same question.

“And only one guardian can stay in the emergency room. Please leave.”

“Ha, really…” Gidong scratched his head, glancing at Pilsung, and nodded to the nurse. As soon as she left, he drew the curtains around the bed.

He had rushed over after receiving Pilsung’s call that they were on their way to Seoul, but there was nothing he could do. Wooyoon was lying there in a shocking state, almost like he was in a coma, because of the Chinese stimulant Joo Taesung had injected him with, and Pilsung was staying by Wooyoon’s side without even treating his own knife wounds on his shoulder and back.

Gidong cautiously spoke, “Hyungnim, shouldn’t you get treated first…?”

But Pilsung didn’t hear him. He just paced by the bed, letting out heavy sighs.

His pheromones wouldn’t come. Even after taking several suppressants and non-pheromone pills, the pheromones that usually caused him trouble wouldn’t appear when he needed them. Whether it was due to a developed tolerance, as Dr. Kim had said, or a problem with his control, he just wished they would listen to him, just this once.

“……”

Pilsung stared at Wooyoon’s face in silence and gently covered his unfocused, wide-open eyes with his hand.

Gidong’s pheromones wouldn’t be of much help. The statement that alpha pheromones could provide stability implied an exchange of emotions. Gidong also knew that pheromones released out of simple goodwill wouldn’t have much effect, so he waited quietly for Pilsung’s instructions instead of offering to help.

Pilsung, after gently wiping away the tears around Wooyoon’s eyes, retracted his hand and looked at Gidong.

“Stay here and watch Nam Wooyoon. Call me immediately if anything happens.”

“Where are you going?”

“The medical center.”

“Yes, don’t worry and go. While you’re there, get treated…!”

Pilsung left the emergency room without hearing the rest of Gidong’s words. He hurried through the crowded hospital lobby and headed to the parking lot, taking out his phone.

He couldn’t leave Nam Wooyoon like that for two days. He had promised to protect him, to take responsibility for him, so he had to do it.

After a few rings, Dr. Kim Chunse’s voice answered.

[I’m scared whenever you call now. Did you get into another fight?]

“I’m coming over, so prepare that stimulant I took before.”

[What? A few days ago you were throwing a fit demanding suppressants, and now suddenly you want a stimulant…?]

“I’ll be there in thirty, no, twenty minutes. Stay at the medical center.”

After unilaterally ending the call, Pilsung started the car and sped towards the medical center. His eyes darted nervously as he gripped the steering wheel, his hands trembling.

It’s because of that damn father. Because of that fucking father…!

He swallowed hard, his throat bobbing, and his breathing grew ragged. Pilsung squeezed his eyes shut, then opened them again, trembling as if he were about to have a seizure.

He had vowed never to live as an alpha after his father, whom he had sought out yearning for familial affection, slashed his throat, saying he didn’t need an alpha son… and yet, things had come to this.

The thought of his father made the long scar on his neck throb as if it were freshly inflicted. Pilsung roughly wiped his tearing eyes with the hand gripping the steering wheel. The image of Wooyoon lying unconscious in the emergency room flashed before him.

“Ha…. Fuck….”

Defiance against his father. The struggle not to justify the abuse he suffered. And deeper than all of that, fear. Pilsung finally acknowledged the fear he had never revealed to anyone.

He was afraid. Afraid of living as an alpha. The moment he accepted his alpha life, it felt like Baek Pilsung, the person, could die. He was afraid that even if he died unjustly, walking down the street, sleeping, at any moment, it would be a deserved death, just like his father’s constant verbal abuse had claimed.

He wanted to survive. Pilsung had always lived a rough life, close to death, wandering the streets, but deep down, he always wanted to survive. That’s why he couldn’t ignore those in need. He wanted to help them survive. Their foolish and tenacious life force was endearing. He wanted to protect them. No one had protected him, so he lived alone, but he wanted to be that person for them.

Pilsung, his eyes bloodshot, sniffled loudly and turned the steering wheel.

So, there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for the vulnerable Nam Wooyoon.

“Director Kim,” a nurse called out, glancing at Director Kim Chunse, who was restlessly pacing around the medical center. Director Kim shoved his hands into his gown pockets and plopped down on a chair, his legs shaking.

Pilsung usually only contacted him when he needed something, but it was rare for him to demand treatment without any explanation like today. Whether he was furious or half-dead, if Director Kim persistently questioned him about why he was at the medical center, Pilsung would eventually confess.

Since the government tacitly condoned the illegal operation of the medical center but provided absolutely no medical supplies, Director Kim had to procure them himself. Thus, he needed to know in advance what kind of injuries a patient had sustained and where, so that the medical center could be prepared, and Pilsung knew this.

However, today, Pilsung had hung up without giving him a chance to ask, so Director Kim figured something big must have happened. Sure enough, he found news about a raid on a corporate organization suspected to be connected to Baek Pilsung. He was relieved to see that Pilsung’s men hadn’t been arrested, but the mention of a hostage in the article made him think of Wooyoon. It wasn’t difficult to deduce who the pheromone stimulant Pilsung requested was for.

Pilsung, who said he would arrive in twenty minutes, showed up fifteen minutes later, his face smeared with sweat, dirt, and blood. He took off his suit jacket as he entered.

“Fuck, inject it quickly.”

He rolled up his shirt sleeves and sat in the examination chair, his arm extended, looking even more urgent than he had a few days ago when he had come for suppressants. As Director Kim opened his mouth to try and calm him down, Pilsung cut him off, as if he already knew what he was going to say.

“I don’t care about the test results, just give it to me.”

“Hey, you…”

“I’m going to live as an alpha, so bring the stimulant!”

His bloodshot eyes glared at Director Kim as if he were about to lose control.

“You said I should choose whether to live as an alpha or not for you, damn it! Protecting him is protecting you, so inject me now!”

Director Kim, sighing and rubbing his throbbing forehead, gestured to the nurse to bring the prepared stimulant. Then, he pointed at Pilsung’s blood-soaked shirt, just like the first time they met.

“It’ll take some time for the medicine to take effect, so let’s treat your injuries while you get the injection. He’ll be shocked if he sees you like this. What happened?”

Pilsung, slightly calmer after mentioning Wooyoon, replied curtly, “…Got stabbed.”

“How many times?”

“Damn, who counts stab wounds while getting stabbed? I don’t know.”

Director Kim stood up and cut Pilsung’s blood-soaked shirt off his back with medical scissors. There were multiple lacerations on his right shoulder and back. Blood was still welling up from a deep wound near his neck. It was surprising he had managed to drive to the medical center with that much blood loss.

“Oh, you idiot. You’re bleeding this much and the first thing you ask for is a stimulant?”

Pilsung, barely registering the nagging, was focused on exchanging messages with someone on his phone. Shaking his head, Director Kim rinsed the wounds, which were caked with sweat and dirt, with saline solution and began disinfecting them.

He stitched up the wounds while administering the stimulant into Pilsung’s arm. Pilsung felt a rush of heat throughout his body.

“You’ll have a fever all night like last time, so make sure you take the anti-inflammatory I’m giving you. If you’re out of it because of the pheromones, tell Gidong to give it to you.”

“…Sir.”

Director Kim, used to Pilsung addressing him casually, slowly pulled out the medical needle, surprised by the formal address, and replied, “What.”

“If… something happens to me, don’t tell Nam Wooyoon.”

Director Kim scoffed and shook his head, finding it absurd that a gangster who spent his days stabbing and being stabbed was suddenly sentimental. “No way.”

“You can’t.” Pilsung retorted sharply, his back muscles twitching as his voice trailed off. “He’ll… stop eating and cry…”

Director Kim stared at Pilsung, who muttered in an uncharacteristically melancholic voice, for a moment before speaking.

“I don’t know what side effects this stimulant will have since the test results aren’t out yet, but I’ll take responsibility and treat you if anything happens, so relax your muscles! The needle won’t go in!”

Director Kim kicked Pilsung’s chair leg playfully, trying to lighten the mood. But Pilsung’s face remained tense, lost in thought.

Director Kim insisted on driving, despite Pilsung wanting to drive himself. As he predicted, Pilsung was already succumbing to the effects of the stimulant before they even reached the university hospital thirty minutes away.

At the hospital, Director Kim called Gidong out and dragged Pilsung’s large frame out of the passenger seat. He asked a former student, now a doctor, for a room and had Wooyoon moved from the emergency room to a private room.

Despite being heavily under the influence of the drug, as soon as Pilsung saw Wooyoon lying in bed, he crawled in next to him. As if his freshly stitched back didn’t hurt, he curled up awkwardly beside Wooyoon, embracing and stroking his much smaller frame.

Seeing Wooyoon with his eyelids taped shut and a wet gauze covering his mouth, Director Kim immediately understood why Pilsung had come to him in such a frantic state.

That night, Director Kim sat on the sofa in the hospital room, observing the two for a long time, monitoring Pilsung’s reaction to the stimulant. Despite suffering from both a high fever and chills due to his fluctuating pheromone levels, Pilsung didn’t let go of Wooyoon for a moment. Occasionally, he would even kiss Wooyoon’s head. In short, he was utterly devoted.

After witnessing Pilsung’s feelings for Wooyoon, Director Kim felt relieved. If this man, who had been so busy denying himself and fighting the world, had finally decided to accept his true nature and live as an alpha, that was enough.

He would learn to take responsibility and stand tall in the world through love.

Wooyoon’s eyelids were stuck together from dried tears. He forced them open and looked around the brightly lit hospital room, sunlight streaming through the blinds. With the neat furniture like the sofa and table, he would have mistaken it for a hotel room if it weren’t for the IV drip connected to his arm.

The terrifying events before his memory went blank flooded his mind. The screams, the pained groans, the bright red blood, the desperate struggles, the vile voices ringing in his ears…

A headache threatened to set in. Wooyoon tried to shake off the painful memories and touched his throat. His mouth was dry and his throat scratchy, as if he had been caught in a sandstorm in a desolate desert.

Ah…. Pilsung…

Just as he sat up, worried about Pilsung’s stab wound despite his own intense thirst, the door opened. Pilsung, who was entering the room while talking to someone outside, saw Wooyoon awake and his eyes widened.

“Nam Wooyoon!”

Pilsung, wearing a patient gown identical to Wooyoon’s, rushed to the bedside, knelt down, and took his hands. “Are you okay? Does anything hurt?”

“…Water.” Wooyoon managed to croak out. Pilsung shook his head.

“They said you should use the restroom first before drinking anything. Let’s go to the bathroom.”

“Smell… you… smell.”

Pilsung stopped as he was about to help Wooyoon up. He let go of Wooyoon’s hands and knelt down again.

“Do you… smell pheromones from me?”

Unable to speak, Wooyoon just nodded, looking down at Pilsung kneeling by the bed. He didn’t know how long he had been asleep, but Pilsung looked much thinner. He wondered if his stab wounds were okay. He was curious about how Pilsung was emitting alpha pheromones, and why they were still present, but he was more worried about Pilsung’s injuries.

As he stared at what looked like bandages peeking out from Pilsung’s loose gown collar, Pilsung nodded solemnly and shouted towards the open door, “Choi Gidong! Bring it!”

As if he had been waiting, Gidong immediately entered the room, holding something in his arms. It was a pair of bolt cutters.

Gidong bowed to Wooyoon and placed the gleaming bolt cutters in front of Pilsung with a serious expression.

Pilsung rolled up his sleeve and said, “I’ll explain everything you’re curious about, but before that, let me apologize for my wrongdoings.”

“Wh, what…?”

“What good are empty apologies? Damn it, even a letter wouldn’t be enough for the sins I’ve committed against you.”

Pilsung placed his little finger, adorned with a gold ring, between the blades of the bolt cutters. Wooyoon, completely bewildered by the situation unfolding before him, just blinked rapidly.

“I could cut off two fingers to atone, but let’s spare the ring finger for now, in case we get matching rings later.”

Gidong, standing behind Pilsung, nodded in solemn agreement with his poignant words, opened a bottle of soju, and splashed the alcohol on Pilsung’s hand and the bolt cutters.

“Ah, uh!” Wooyoon cried out urgently, his voice still hoarse. But Pilsung and Gidong, seemingly oblivious, continued their solemn finger-cutting ceremony with resolute expressions.

“I was afraid of living as an alpha.” Pilsung confessed his innermost feelings and past sins, his hand gripping the bolt cutters.

“That man, my father… he always said… because I’m an alpha… bastards like me deserve to die… he’s been dead for a long time, but damn it… ha…”

Pilsung paused to catch his breath and continued, “Those words were stuck in my head, and I think I was subconsciously scared. I thought if I acknowledged my alpha self, I’d become someone unworthy of living. But it was wrong of me to deceive you. Damn it, I hate being betrayed the most, and yet I betrayed you. On top of that, you suffered because of me…”

“……”

“I’m sorry for putting you in danger when I promised to protect you…”

“Pil… Pilsung…”

“I know how much you fear alphas. I know you wouldn’t have continued seeing me if you knew I was an alpha.” His grip on the bolt cutters tightened.

“I know a lot about committing sins, but I don’t know how to atone for them. I’m a dumb gangster, so when I sinned, I went to jail, got stabbed, and that was that… but that doesn’t work with you.”

“……”

“So I’ll atone as best as I can.”

As Pilsung finished his last sentence, Gidong, as promised, took out a handkerchief from his suit jacket pocket, rolled it up, and placed it in Pilsung’s mouth. Just as Pilsung bit down on the handkerchief and was about to squeeze the handles of the bolt cutters, a pillow flew at his face.

Wooyoon, out of bed, his face red with exertion, swung the pillow at Pilsung relentlessly. He had often seen friends on TV having pillow fights in hotel rooms and had harbored a simple dream of doing the same someday. Wooyoon was determined to fulfill that dream now.

The pillow hit Pilsung’s head squarely, knocking the handkerchief out of his mouth. Pilsung, still kneeling, yelled as he was bombarded with pillows, “Hey, Nam! Nam Wooyoon! Pfft, wait! You can’t move so suddenly! You’ll collapse!”

Wooyoon, panting and biting his lower lip, turned sharply to Gidong. He mustered his remaining strength and attacked Gidong with the pillow as well. Gidong shielded himself with his arms and stumbled backward.

“Ah! Sister-in-law! Ouch!”

“Ugh! You, sob!!”

Wooyoon glared at Pilsung and Gidong, mouthing the worst curses he could think of, his voice still gone. The two men, oblivious to the insults, exchanged glances, trying to figure out where their solemn apology ceremony had gone wrong.

Pilsung raised his eyebrows at Gidong, implying that the bolt cutters were too small. Gidong had scoured the nearby traditional market that morning to rent them from a herbal medicine shop, but from Wooyoon’s perspective, the portable bolt cutters, which looked like they could barely cut through a twig, probably lacked sincerity.

Pilsung understood Wooyoon’s feelings perfectly. Gidong, however, seemed clueless, shaking his head in confusion. Pilsung glared at Gidong again, signaling that he would be getting a beating later for failing to procure larger ones.

“Uh… w-water…”

The two men communicating through glances and gestures in front of him further fueled Wooyoon’s anger. He gripped the pillow and glared at the portable bolt cutters in front of Pilsung, then nudged them with his foot. Pilsung, startled, quickly grabbed Wooyoon’s small foot.

“Hey! Hey, you’ll hurt your foot!”

“Shut… up!” Wooyoon’s strained voice cracked. Pilsung, vindicated that the size of the bolt cutters was indeed the issue, shot a “See?” look at Gidong. Finally admitting his fault, Gidong quickly grabbed the bolt cutters and hurried out of the room to avoid further offending Wooyoon.

“You’re so weak and yet you’re moving around so recklessly. You’ll collapse.”

“……”

“What, damn it, what are you looking at?”

Pilsung sat Wooyoon down on the bed and followed his gaze, turning around. The doctor and nurses, who had come to check on Wooyoon after he regained consciousness, were standing at the open door with dumbfounded expressions.

The doctor, Director Kim’s former student, entered the room and whispered a warning in Pilsung’s ear, “What do you think you’re doing, bringing alpha pheromones into the omega ward? I got you this room as a favor to Professor Kim, and if you cause a disturbance like this, I’ll have you discharged.”

Pilsung nodded obediently to the doctor’s whispered warning. It was only natural to comply with the doctor who had given Wooyoon a private room in the already limited secondary gender ward.

The doctor, true to his mentor’s style, gave a stern warning to the large alpha without any hesitation, then turned to Wooyoon with a kind smile.

“Mr. Nam Wooyoon, you don’t remember briefly waking up early this morning, do you?”

Wooyoon covered his throat with one hand and nodded.

“You’ll be able to speak normally soon. We’ll run a drug reaction test this afternoon to check if the drugs that were forcibly administered have been completely eliminated from your system, if your pheromones are being produced normally, and if you’re reacting normally to them. There’s no need to fast for this test, so please use the restroom and have your lunch as usual.”

Wooyoon blinked his tear-stained eyes and nodded again. The doctor, maintaining eye contact with Wooyoon, pointed to Pilsung standing behind him.

“Thanks to your guardian, you regained consciousness in just one day. Usually, patients suffer from seizures and fever for two days, but you can consider yourself to have simply slept well and woken up.”

“……”

Wooyoon’s eyes shifted from the doctor to Pilsung. Pilsung’s face, slightly thinner than before, was staring at him from behind the doctor. His steady gaze, which didn’t shy away from Wooyoon’s, was gentle. His features were still sharp, but the emotions in his eyes were soft.

“Your guardian went through a lot for you. I’ll see you during rounds this afternoon.”

The doctor and nurses nodded and left the room. Pilsung, who had been staring at Wooyoon, turned away and rubbed his neck awkwardly.

“Go to the bathroom and come back. I’ll… go to the store and get you some water and something to eat. Damn, how are we supposed to wait until lunch…”

Wooyoon stared at Pilsung, who was scratching his neck, wondering why he was suddenly acting shy after his outburst about cutting off his fingers as an apology.

“If… you think you might fall while peeing… should I go with you?”

Wooyoon, who had been staring blankly at Pilsung, frowned and quickly shook his head, getting up. Pilsung watched Wooyoon hurry into the bathroom at the entrance of the room, pushing the IV stand, and then left the room.

Pilsung went down to the hospital basement, shuffling in his slightly too small slippers, and bought a roll of kimbap and a bottle of water. He also got a container of porridge in case Wooyoon couldn’t eat the kimbap. He wasn’t fully recovered himself, but the thought of feeding Wooyoon quickened his steps.

When he returned to the room, Wooyoon was just coming out of the bathroom, wiping his face with a wet towel. His face, which had been stained with tears and blood, was now clean and clear. He still looked paler and more pitiful than usual, though.

“Did you pee?”

Wooyoon frowned, not wanting to answer such a blunt question.

He sat next to Pilsung on the hospital room sofa. Wooyoon, swinging his feet slightly, felt a pang of hunger as he looked at the kimbap Pilsung handed him. His last meal had been breakfast before he was kidnapped by Joo Taesung, and he had barely touched that, so his stomach was empty. He refused the wooden chopsticks Pilsung offered and picked up a piece of kimbap with his hand.

“……”

He chewed quietly, glancing sideways at Pilsung. He had thought Pilsung looked thinner even back in the chaotic warehouse, but now, looking closely, his cheeks were really hollow. Wooyoon understood what the doctor meant when he said Pilsung had suffered in his stead. The faint scent of Pilsung’s pheromones wasn’t unfamiliar anymore, probably because Pilsung had held and comforted him while he was unconscious.

Alpha Baek Pilsung…

Wooyoon, staring at Pilsung’s profile, offered him a piece of kimbap. His hand moved before he could ask all the questions he had. Pilsung glanced at him and shook his head slightly. But Wooyoon persisted, urging him to take it.

“Eat.”

His voice was lower and huskier than usual, but it was the first proper sentence Wooyoon had spoken since regaining consciousness. Pilsung wasn’t hungry, but he couldn’t refuse Wooyoon twice, so he opened his mouth and ate the kimbap. As Pilsung munched on the pickled radish, Wooyoon asked, “Did I wake up early this morning?”

Pilsung swallowed the kimbap and replied, “Yeah, seems like it. I don’t really know. I wasn’t in my right mind until a few hours ago because of the pheromones.”

“……”

A brief, awkward silence followed. Wooyoon fiddled with the foil wrapping the kimbap before speaking again.

“Does it hurt?”

“What?”

“There…” Wooyoon pointed at the bandage visible through Pilsung’s gown. It felt like a dream that he had witnessed Pilsung being stabbed repeatedly. Like a bad nightmare. It was such a shocking scene, yet the lack of reality made him strangely calm. Joo Taesung, his brother…

“Do you think stab wounds hurt someone who’s been stabbed and been fine? Don’t worry about it.”

“……”

Pilsung frowned and scratched his forehead, sensing Wooyoon’s unease as he stared at the kimbap with his lips pressed together.

“Are you still… angry?”

“Yes.”

“Should I… write you a letter…?”

“Pilsung.”

Wooyoon put the kimbap down on the table and turned to face Pilsung. He stared at Pilsung’s face, the face that had watched over him all night. His gaze lingered on Pilsung’s strong shoulders, the shoulders that had held him tight even amidst the bloody chaos, and he spoke in a low voice, “Instead of a letter… tell me.”

Pilsung’s eyes flickered as he stared back at Wooyoon. Wooyoon strained his scratchy throat and spoke a little louder, “Tell me again, slowly, what you said earlier.”

“……”

“Do you remember I said I was afraid you wouldn’t come back, like my brother…?”

Pilsung answered softly, “Yeah,” his eyes fixed on Wooyoon’s lips. Unlike their usual rosy color, Wooyoon’s lips were chapped white and looked like they might tear with every husky word.

“Actually… the more I liked you, the more… anxious I got…”

“……”

“I think it’s because I don’t know you well enough. You appeared in my life… so suddenly… You told me about your childhood and your office, but I don’t know the details… so…”

“……”

“Tell me. I want to hear about your parents, about the pheromones, everything, properly again.”

Pilsung, who had been listening quietly to Wooyoon’s hesitant confession, rested his arms on his slightly parted thighs and leaned forward. Wooyoon waited for his answer, watching Pilsung’s still profile, his lips pressed together as if deep in thought.

After a long, heavy silence, Pilsung finally spoke.

“There are a lot of messy stories… but I’ll tell you if you’re okay with it.”

“It’s okay. I want to hear them.”

Pilsung nodded in acknowledgment of Wooyoon’s immediate reply.

“Ha… Well, when I was young…” With a long sigh, Pilsung began to tell his childhood stories, stories he had never shared with anyone in detail.

His father’s violence and the resulting aversion to his own secondary gender. His relationship with Joo Taesung, whom he met while running away from his father. The frequent conflicts with Joo Taesung, who was a mid-level manager in the begging group, which led to his departure. The story of being stabbed in the stomach as a condition for leaving the begging group. The ridiculous and miserable story of returning to his father after that ordeal, only to almost have his throat cut. The sordid story of his revenge by not taking his ailing father to the hospital.

Besides his rough life, Pilsung also confessed to making and selling non-pheromone pills for those like himself who rejected their secondary gender, and how, due to taking them for over a decade, he had done something to Wooyoon on the night he couldn’t remember.

A troubled expression crossed his usually stoic face as he confessed to acting like an animal with the unconscious Wooyoon.

“Everyone in this world has their own story, and since I’ve told you roughly, I thought there was no need to go into details. Especially about the drug dealing and stuff… I thought you wouldn’t understand even if I explained…”

“The purple pills you always take?”

“Yeah. I wanted to show you the workshop, but strangely, the more time passed, the less I wanted to take you there.”

Pilsung chuckled, amused by his own words. But Wooyoon didn’t find any of his stories funny.

“The air quality isn’t good at the drug manufacturing place, it’s remote and not clean… At first, I wanted to show it off… but later, I started to worry about everything…”

“……”

“Your brother disappeared from the scene that day.” Pilsung, embarrassed about revealing so much about himself for the first time, changed the subject to Heejae. “There was that incident where he faked his death using someone else’s body at the Yangwon boarding house. He probably got scared and ran away because of his involvement with Joo Taesung.”

Clicking his tongue, Pilsung took Wooyoon’s hand. “I’m sorry I couldn’t keep my promise to let you see your brother.”

“I talked to him… a little… when we fought in the warehouse.”

Pilsung remembered the two brothers grappling and fighting. He had been worried that they might have said something unnecessary to each other. He regretted not paying more attention to Wooyoon while beating up Joo Taesung.

“He probably just spouted nonsense.”

Wooyoon, surprisingly, chuckled at Pilsung’s annoyed words. But the faint smile quickly disappeared, and his eyes drooped sadly. “I knew he wouldn’t apologize or anything… but I still wanted to hear it.”

“It doesn’t matter. What good is an apology from that bastard?”

“If he apologized… like you taught me… I wouldn’t have forgiven him, and… this time, I was going to abandon him…”

Wooyoon wasn’t crying, but his voice was thick with emotion.

“He told me that day…”

“…What did he say?”

“He said it all happened because of me.”

“Fucking useless…”

Wooyoon cut Pilsung off before he could criticize Heejae further.

“I know it’s nonsense. But I keep thinking about it. It’s not entirely my fault that he did those things… but being my brother must have been so hard on him…”

“No.” This time, Pilsung firmly interrupted Wooyoon. Wooyoon looked at Pilsung, who had grabbed his hand, with uncertain eyes. But Pilsung’s eyes were filled with conviction, almost to the point of making Wooyoon uncomfortable.

“He’s just that kind of person.”

“……”

“There were other options, but he chose the easy way out. I know because I’ve been there.”

Denying his own identity. Rejecting and avoiding his true self. Those were the easy choices. He didn’t want to admit that he was a weak coward who trembled at the thought of being killed for being an alpha, so he covered it up with resentment towards his father. He oversimplified a complex issue and ended up hurting the person most precious to him. He regretted it deeply and finally acknowledged it.

Pilsung gently squeezed Wooyoon’s hand in his.

“He was greedy, and when things didn’t go his way, he lost his mind. You wouldn’t have done that.”

“……”

“If you were the older brother, and he was the younger one.”

“……”

“You would have raised Nam Heejae well. You would have been happy to see your brother smile. If you were struggling, you would have talked to him and worked things out together.”

“How… how would you know…?” Wooyoon mumbled, embarrassed by Pilsung’s confident tone. Pilsung’s large hand tightened around his.

“I just know. It’s written all over your face.”

Wooyoon chuckled at Pilsung’s absurd joke. But Pilsung was quite serious.

“You would never have gambled away your earnings, gotten drunk, and sold yourself to some alpha, Nam Wooyoon, never.”

“……”

Wooyoon’s eyes crinkled as he smiled, then looked at Pilsung seriously.

“That bastard… he locked you up in that moldy room and secretly went to night school, and look at him now, still doing nothing. Nam Heejae was drinking in my territory without a proper job. He’s just that kind of person.”

“……”

“And he knows it. That’s why he was so angry at you.”

Wooyoon recalled his brother coming home late at night and throwing cold convenience store food at him. He remembered the look of disdain in his eyes and the irritated tone of his voice.

It wasn’t my fault, he didn’t change because of me…

“He was just taking his anger out on you. Because he envied you.”

Because I’m a good person…

“Seeing you made him realize how pathetic and useless he was, so he hated you.”

“……”

Wooyoon had never thought about his brother’s actions, the cause of his suffering, in the way Pilsung described. Even if Pilsung’s words were just meant to comfort him, Wooyoon was touched.

Even if they are just sweet words, maybe… maybe I am a good person…