Spark Chapter 2.7 - Spark

Only opened his mouth after the sound of the clock’s second hand, skipping over silence and silence, repeated several times.

“I can’t like you like you do.”

Cha Hongjo, muttering the bitter words like poison, made an expression in that moment as if he was forcing himself to swallow a blade. But it disappeared without a trace immediately.

“…….”

“…….”

In the submerged air, a period of silence settled.

“……Ha.”

Finally, Go Baekwoo let out the breath he had been holding. At the same time, his reddened eyes welled up. Tears, escaping from between his eyelashes, fell onto Cha Hongjo’s cheek. Thud, thud……

“Why, why can’t you!”

Go Baekwoo shouted and punched the empty space as if frustrated. The mattress vibrated. The robe precariously draped over Cha Hongjo’s shoulder slid down. Cha Hongjo didn’t even blink.

“Hongjo, Cha Hongjo.”

Scattering tears on Cha Hongjo’s bare skin, Go Baekwoo asked,

“What do I have to do to make you like me?”

“…….”

Cha Hongjo habitually reached for a cigarette. But what he held in his fingers was completely burnt out, the embers extinguished. He discarded the useless butt without hesitation. Then he said what he had been meaning to say.

“I never said I didn’t like you.”

Pushing the sobbing Go Baekwoo aside, he sat up and looked for cigarettes on the bedside table. Before putting one between his lips, he spoke again.

“I said I can’t like you like you do.”

“……So.”

Go Baekwoo, who had been crouching and crying in the spot where he was pushed, knelt down and grabbed Cha Hongjo’s shoulders.

“Why can’t you.”

He shook Cha Hongjo as he pressed him. Cha Hongjo, furrowing his brows, lit the cigarette with an indifferent expression as if he wasn’t affected by Go Baekwoo’s tears at all. He inhaled the smoke, turned his head away to exhale it far away, and then answered.

“I’m just that kind of bastard.”

As he said that, he brushed off Go Baekwoo’s arms clinging to his shoulders.

“There’s no such thing as ‘that kind of person.’”

But he was immediately grabbed again. Cha Hongjo, who had been ignoring the face covering his front, narrowed his eyes and looked at Go Baekwoo.

“Hongjo, please……”

Go Baekwoo, with the edges of his features all red, looked innocent and pitiful. He shouldn’t have looked until the end. His throat tightened. As he had already realized, he was weak to Go Baekwoo’s tears.

“……Baekwoo, you.”

He swallowed his dry saliva repeatedly with a hoarse throat and barely managed to get his voice out.

“Since when were you so pretty?”

“…….”

Go Baekwoo didn’t answer the unexpected question, only biting his lower lip as if frustrated. Cha Hongjo, holding a cigarette and narrowing his eyes, grabbed Go Baekwoo’s chin and turned it from side to side. As if examining him closely. After doing so three or four times, he let go and asked again.

“Huh? Answer me. Since when have you been pretty?”

Go Baekwoo released his pale lower lip, moved it slightly, and then answered.

“……Since, always.”

“See.”

“…….”

“You and I are originally like this. So don’t expect anything from me.”

Go Baekwoo was speechless at Cha Hongjo’s sophistry.

He would rather be harshly rejected. He would rather be told he was hated. He would rather be pushed away with a look of disgust and hatred, and promised that he would never be loved. That would be less cruel than this.

Go Baekwoo clenched his hands that had slipped from Cha Hongjo, looked down for a moment, then looked up and asked, meeting his gaze,

“……So, you’re originally that kind of bastard, what do you want me to do?”

“…….”

Cha Hongjo didn’t answer. Go Baekwoo also didn’t demand a further answer, as he had no intention of listening to anything Cha Hongjo might say.

It would be useless even if he was told to give up the increasingly monstrous, one-sided love. If he could give up, he would have done so much earlier. It was too late. Even if it rotted, festered, and eventually shattered beyond repair, there was nothing he could do. Then that would be the end. It would end like that. He couldn’t stop until he reached the very bottom. He didn’t know how to stop. He also couldn’t accept the ‘originally like that’ Cha Hongjo. Because Cha Hongjo wasn’t ‘originally like that.’ He could change him, he would change him.

Repeating that to himself, Go Baekwoo wiped his tears and stared at Cha Hongjo with a clear view. Cha Hongjo, leaning languidly against the headboard and smoking, half-closed his eyes. He couldn’t tell what he was looking at. His black pupils absorbed the bedroom light and gleamed scarlet. It would be nice if he could delve into those pupils and steal his thoughts……. The other side of his features, where the scarlet light flowed smoothly, was covered in shadows. Grey smoke layered over it once again. Like that scene, Cha Hongjo was revealing and bare, yet layered and secretive.

Cha Hongjo was sensual, defensive, nihilistic, and lonely. It felt like the abstract qualities that made up Cha Hongjo were transferring to him. Even though he was in the same space, looking at Cha Hongjo, he felt as lonely as if he had crashed on a deserted island. He was worn out, scared, and at a loss.

Increasingly…….

More.

“Ha……”

Go Baekwoo, averting his gaze from Cha Hongjo, wiped his still-wet face and stood up.

“I’ll go wash up.”

Cha Hongjo’s gaze lifted.

“You get dressed.”

“Clothes?”

Cha Hongjo asked, flicking the cigarette ash. Go Baekwoo, standing almost with his back to him and looking down slightly, said in a hoarse voice,

“We’re leaving.”

“Where to.”

“Get dressed.”

Go Baekwoo, speaking in a commanding tone, moved immediately as if he had decided not to say anything more.

Cha Hongjo only stretched out further, moving only the hand holding the cigarette. He leaned back as if to bury the back of his head against the wall and blew out his breath towards the ceiling.

“Haa……”

The smoke that followed drew the trajectory of his breath.

‘The article will be out tomorrow.’

The first thing that came to Cha Hongjo’s mind as soon as he heard Mrs. Cho’s announcement was Go Baekwoo. Pretty boy would be surprised. He would be angry. Would he hate him? Hypocritical worry and arrogant speculation. He felt a fear unbefitting his nature. After that, he was so drunk that he couldn’t remember who he was, and he couldn’t remember what he had been thinking. He barely came to his senses at dawn, and for a moment, he wished that the naked body tangled with his bare skin was Go Baekwoo’s. But the small body that easily nestled in his arms couldn’t possibly be Go Baekwoo’s, even from a fleeting sensation.

As if the persistent cold that hadn’t left him for nearly a month had worsened overnight, both his body and mind were sluggish. But the throbbing headache made it difficult for him to continue sleeping. He barely managed to shower and come out when Mrs. Cho held out a small bag, about half the size of her palm.

‘What’s this?’

‘Medicine.’

‘What kind of medicine?’

‘A panacea that works well for hangovers and cures any ailment.’

Mrs. Cho, explaining it like a con artist in a refined tone, picked up some of the powder with her index finger and put it in her mouth as if brushing her teeth. Try it, Hongjo……. Mrs. Cho offered, her eyelids and breath trembling slightly. Cha Hongjo finally realized the true nature of the ‘panacea.’ He didn’t feel like refusing. He did it.

‘How is it……? Good, right?’

‘…….’

The world shook as if there was an earthquake, and then everything was dyed pink. Then, familiar faces poured into the bedroom. Mom, he had forgotten her face, but he remembered it clearly in that moment. And Dad……. Aunt, Uncle, cousins. Women he had met, Director Kim, Yang Seohee. Tae Pyunghyun, the owner of a tea room, and Pretty boy……. Go Baekwoo. Go Baekwoo. Go Baekwoo. Go Baekwoo again.

‘……Fuck…….’

The pink room, filled with Go Baekwoo, turned white. Go Baekwoo and Go Baekwoo rushed towards him, stroking his forehead and kissing his cheeks and lips.

‘Yes…… good…….’

He floundered among the Go Baekwoos until mid-morning, then regained consciousness. The world he faced with his bare eyes wasn’t pink. Nor was it white. It was faded and rusty.

‘Leave that here.’

Cha Hongjo, leaning his shoulder against the bathroom doorframe, spoke to Mrs. Cho, who was elegantly dressed and facing the mirror.

‘You seem to like it.’

Mrs. Cho, putting an earring in her right ear, smiled and took the medicine out of her handbag and placed it on the counter.

‘I can give our actor Cha as much as he wants. Just say the word.’

Mrs. Cho, with her handbag on her arm, approached him. She made a kissing sound, close enough to touch his cheek but not quite, and brushed past him.

‘Behave yourself, okay? There are jackals after actor Cha swarming outside, so don’t go out carelessly.’

He didn’t know how she was when she came in, but Mrs. Cho left the hotel room with graceful steps. Cha Hongjo stared blankly at the closed door, then returned to the bedroom and melted the medicine on his tongue again. This time, Go Baekwoo didn’t come. Instead, a tree trunk pierced the bedroom wall and grew in a winding shape, bearing abundant grapes. He plucked the grapes one by one, counting them. He counted up to seven thousand six hundred eighty-three.

He returned to the bland world.

As many grapes as there were, feelings of exhaustion and self-loathing formed in his body. He felt disgusted with himself, and nausea welled up. He crawled around the bed, dry heaving. He was thirsty, but he looked for a cigarette instead of water, put it in his mouth, and…….

‘…….’

‘Pretty boy…….’

The real Go Baekwoo came.

‘You came?’

He felt relieved, scared, and ashamed. It was the first time he had ever encountered fear or shame while meeting someone. Cha Hongjo wasn’t so foolish as to not know where those feelings stemmed from. Last night, even after hearing the announcement that the article would be released tomorrow, he was consumed by similar emotions, thinking of Go Baekwoo.

Judging by his forceful demeanor, Go Baekwoo had seen the article. Go Baekwoo seemed surprised and angry…….

Would he hate him?

‘Fuck…….’

Seeing him grab his hair and curse at him, instead of greeting him after not seeing him for a while, meant he was very angry and seemed to hate him. Naturally.

Cha Hongjo closed his eyes and swallowed dryly. He was a sinner, unable to refuse until the end and eventually embracing him. He would gladly accept being spat on. He would willingly be slapped. He deserved it for not reciprocating the feelings he had received. He deserved to be paid back double for stabbing the other person’s heart with his cruel indecisiveness.

‘Cha Hongjo.’

‘…….’

The sin of not pushing away Go Baekwoo when he rushed at him.

He once thought it was Go Baekwoo’s fault for liking him. But it was none other than himself who had ruined their ‘nothing’ relationship in an instant.

‘Make an excuse.’

He realized that when he saw Go Baekwoo’s white forehead, marred by pain and betrayal that wouldn’t have existed if it weren’t for him.

‘What excuse.’

Indeed.

‘What you saw is true.’

He should have dumped Go Baekwoo a long time ago.

He was scared.

Cha Hongjo trembled with vague fear and closed his eyes tighter. Wrinkles formed on his eyelids where blood vessels were visible. His eyelashes, which had calmly curved, soon twitched. And—.

A sharp tearing sound pierced his eardrums. Cha Hongjo opened his eyes wide and turned his head sharply. The direction of the noise was the bathroom. From there, Go Baekwoo rushed out. Blood was dripping from one of his hands.

“Cha Hongjo.”

He followed the dark red trail left on the carpet with his gaze, then, regaining his composure at the sound of his name, he saw Go Baekwoo right in front of him.

A blood-red fist rose. Would he be hit? He widened his eyes in anticipation. But the violence didn’t happen.

“You’re really, cruel.”

An earring dangled in front of his eyes, held in Go Baekwoo’s grip. A gold chain with a pearl at the end…… Ah, Mrs. Cho’s.

Go Baekwoo grabbed Cha Hongjo’s hand, which had fallen on the bed, and opened it. He placed the blood-stained earring on his clean palm. Then he forcibly bent his fingers, making him clench it.

“Keep it safe. You have to return it, it looks expensive.”

“…….”

Cha Hongjo looked alternately at his own fist stained with blood and Go Baekwoo’s fist overflowing with blood. And he habitually lowered his eyelids again. It was after his vision had inverted. His robe and underwear were roughly ripped off. The hand gripping his waist was damp and hot.

Go Baekwoo lifted Cha Hongjo’s hips, who was lying face down. Cha Hongjo pressed his forehead against the floor, clutching the fist holding the earring. It was a posture resembling prayer. He knew what was coming, and even though they hadn’t agreed to it, he didn’t feel victimized. He was just scared and regretful. He was scared because he didn’t know what Go Baekwoo was feeling, and he regretted that he didn’t have any excuses. The sharp point of the earring pierced his palm.

“…….”

Cha Hongjo, held from behind by a hand that intruded, silently parted his lips. Then one buttock was pushed outward. He didn’t expect any kind of foreplay, he expected a finger or a penis to thrust straight into his exposed private parts, and.

“……Ah!”

It didn’t match any of his expectations. Cha Hongjo opened his eyes wide at the damp and soft sensation touching between his buttocks. He turned his head back and saw Go Baekwoo kneeling behind him. His face was buried against his back, so he couldn’t see his expression. But he could clearly tell what he was doing. He was licking, there.

“Wait, just a moment……”

Once the first time passed, neither he nor Go Baekwoo held back. They didn’t care about the other’s gender or which reproductive organs they used. It was pointless to consider such things. They had already started, and regardless of the conditions, they were quite compatible.

But the act of caressing his anus with his tongue was bewilderingly unfamiliar. He couldn’t even bring himself to tell him to stop. He was dumbfounded. Instead, he tried to stop him by stretching out his arm behind him. But it was ruthlessly swatted away by Go Baekwoo, who had been slowly getting erect and removed his hand from his penis.

“Don’t…… do that there.”

Cha Hongjo clasped his hands together in front of his head again, lowered his head, and muttered. He hadn’t felt this ashamed even during his first time having sex. His partner had only asked, ‘Are you really a virgin?’ at his nonchalant attitude, and Cha Hongjo thought he didn’t have any psychological boundaries regarding sexual acts. But why was he like this now?

“Go Baekwoo……”

Well, whether it was sucking the front or licking the back, it was similar. Perhaps what was embarrassing wasn’t the act itself, but his actions, his appearance, his existence, which had never been justified.

A soft tongue flicked at his anus, which twitched every time his muscles tensed as his penis was rubbed. He shuddered as the pointed tip of the tongue traced between the folds as if wetting them. Trembling with goosebumps rising on his lower back, he said,

“Just, put it in.”

“……Why.”

The body heat pressed against his back receded, and a low, deep voice was heard.

“This much isn’t even embarrassing for you, is it?”

“…….”

It was a clear accusation and an undeniable fact. Cha Hongjo tightened his grip, his knuckles turning white. The point of the earring pierced his skin. He clenched his teeth at the tearing pain. A thin moan escaped between his teeth. Meanwhile, his front and back became wet again.

“Ugh…… uh.”

The tip of the tongue, passing over the perineum connected to his bottom, gently widened the folds of his hole and entered inside. A terrible, ticklish sensation crawled up his spine. The tender flesh inside was licked, and a finger suddenly entered.

“Ah, ah……”

The hand caressing his penis moved faster, and the two fingers that had entered his hole widened the entrance. A soft tongue filled the remaining gap. The saliva-covered fingers pushed deeper, and Go Baekwoo found Cha Hongjo’s weak spot right away, pressing and rubbing it.

“Ah, ugh……!”

His penis, which had been getting erect slower than usual, hardened at once. Pre-cum beaded on the swollen tip of his glans. Go Baekwoo, coating his palm with the sticky fluid, stroked from the tip to the base with force. A squelching sound repeated rapidly. The hole, filled with fingers and tongue, twitched impatiently.

It was when Cha Hongjo arched his back, nearing the limit of his desire to cum. The hand stroking his front fell away, and the hole where long fingers and tongue had been going in and out also became empty. Go Baekwoo pulled Cha Hongjo, who was crouching obediently as if waiting for the next punishment, up and turned him to face him. Then he unbuckled his belt, unzipped his pants, and pressed down heavily on Cha Hongjo’s shoulders.

Cha Hongjo, kneeling in front of Go Baekwoo’s legs, saw the penis bobbing in front of him, then met his cold gaze looking down at him. Go Baekwoo grabbed his chin and lifted it. At that moment, the smell of blood rushed into his nostrils. Blood was still dripping from Go Baekwoo’s hand.

“Why, can’t you do it?”

“…….”

He had slept with Go Baekwoo countless times, but Cha Hongjo had never moaned while taking Go Baekwoo. It wasn’t that he couldn’t. The problem was not that, but…….

Anything he said now would be a despicable excuse to Go Baekwoo. Cha Hongjo simply crumpled the sheet, lifted it to his teeth, and pulled his jaw and arm in opposite directions. The white sheet, sparsely stained with blood drops, ripped lengthwise.

“…….”

“…….”

Cha Hongjo wrapped the long strip of sheet around Go Baekwoo’s hand like a bandage. Go Baekwoo stared at the white cloth covering the back of his hand layer by layer and at Cha Hongjo. Except for his pale face, Cha Hongjo was no different than usual. An expression beyond indifferent, as if lost in boredom. Go Baekwoo felt miserable and self-loathing at the face that didn’t betray even a hint of anguish in this situation.

The woman he had greeted in the hotel lobby with Tae Pyunghyun. He had thought it was strange that only one of her earlobes was bare. And when he found the same earring she had been wearing in the bathroom, his vision was painted red with rage.

He had assumed Tae Pyunghyun had brought him to the hotel because reporters would swarm his house, and he hadn’t even imagined that he would be with a woman in the midst of a dating scandal. No, Cha Hongjo was the type of person who would do that, but he must have been in denial.

That’s right. Cha Hongjo was the type of person who would do that…….

“Forget it.”

Go Baekwoo muttered and brushed off Cha Hongjo’s hand, which was tying the cloth. Cha Hongjo looked up with an apathetic gaze. His eyes, reflecting Go Baekwoo’s silhouette, didn’t waver. It was always like this. Only Go Baekwoo remained in place, shaken, while Cha Hongjo slipped through his fingers and flowed away leisurely. What was the use of chasing him until his heart wore out? He couldn’t be caught. Cha Hongjo left without even telling him his destination.

Unable to end it until it ended. He had been confident that he would change Cha Hongjo, that he could change him, but……. The belief that he could change someone was an arrogant illusion. A sudden realization pierced his temples like an iron needle.

At that moment, Cha Hongjo took Go Baekwoo’s hand again and tied the cloth. He tied it tightly, tightly enough to make his own hand numb. He didn’t deliberately check how badly he was injured, but the blood wouldn’t stop even under pressure, seeping through the cloth. Releasing the unhealed hand, Cha Hongjo grabbed Go Baekwoo’s penis. He tilted his head slightly and parted his lips. A long finger reached up and brushed through his hair near his temple.

Cha Hongjo, after tracing the length of the shaft from the base to the bottom of the glans with his slightly parted lips, opened his mouth wider and swallowed the thick tip. A heavy weight pressed against his tongue. Swallowing the escaping saliva, he closed his lips. He moved his head back and forth, raising his eyes. Go Baekwoo, with a dazed expression, lowered the finger that had lingered in his hair. His fingertips slid down his temple and cheek as if tracing them.

Cha Hongjo, changing the direction of his head movement diagonally, soon grabbed his own penis and stroked it. He frowned slightly at the hard penis that rubbed slickly against the mucous membrane of his mouth before plunging in and hitting the back of his throat. He forced down a stifled moan into his heaving throat. Go Baekwoo’s hand, which had fallen into the air, rose again and fiddled with Cha Hongjo’s earlobe.

“Ugh……”

Finally, Cha Hongjo squeezed his eyelids shut, stopped moving his head, and his shoulders trembled. Semen splattered on Cha Hongjo’s abdomen and groin.

He wanted to exhale, but his mouth was still full of Go Baekwoo. He barely breathed through his nose, only moving his lips, but Go Baekwoo, as if not even allowing that, grabbed his hair and started thrusting his hips.

“Uh, ugh…… huh…… ugh.”

His lips swelled, and his throat stung from the relentless thrusting that didn’t allow him to catch his breath. Physiological tears flowed. As his vision blurred, Cha Hongjo blinked once. The tears escaping from the corners of his eyes slid down the bridge of his nose.

“Sob, gasp……”

“Ha…… ah……”

Go Baekwoo, pushing his groin in until his red lips touched the base, threw back his head and his chest heaved.

The sensation of a stickier liquid than saliva spraying onto his throat was vivid. Cha Hongjo reflexively swallowed it and pulled his head back. As soon as he pulled the penis out of his mouth, he arched his back and gasped. The air that rushed in all at once was overwhelming. Semen and saliva that had come out with the penis were smeared around his mouth. He brought the back of his hand to wipe it, but ended up touching the torn corner of the bedsheet.

Soon, a heavy weight settled on his lower body and lower back. Something round and hard pressed against his parted buttocks. “Ha.” Cha Hongjo let out a shaky breath. He had just cum, and…….

“Ah!”

After that, he couldn’t even form coherent thoughts. Even after carefully preparing himself, Go Baekwoo’s size was always overwhelming. The breath he had barely regained was trapped in his lungs again. Cha Hongjo, his stomach tense and flat, curled his lips.

The twitching, deep pink hole sucked in the thick glans with difficulty. Go Baekwoo caressed the beautifully curved buttocks, rested for a moment, then pulled his hips back slightly and thrust deeper.

“Heuk!”

Cha Hongjo opened his lips and let out a scream that sounded like a sob. Go Baekwoo continued thrusting at a steady pace, unfazed. The penis, withdrawing with feigned leisure, repeatedly slammed back in fiercely.

“Ah, uh…… ugh…… uh, huh……”

“Ha……”

To accurately hit Cha Hongjo’s sensitive spot, Go Baekwoo pressed down on his protruding lower back, thrusting as if driving his weight down. Unlike his mind, his body reacted honestly.

“A little, ah! Slower, uh……”

“…….”

Contrary to the plea, Go Baekwoo moved his hips even more violently. Heat added to the friction inside. The inner walls became slick with the pre-cum Go Baekwoo had spilled. The area persistently poked by the blunt tip of the penis swelled tautly. His lower abdomen and perineum tightened, and the hole contracted without knowing why. His thighs trembled, making it difficult to even hold up his lower body. If Go Baekwoo hadn’t been holding him up, he would have collapsed long ago.

“Uh, fuck, ah…… ah, sob!”

He was out of his mind, stimulated relentlessly without a break after cumming. Cha Hongjo, shaking helplessly, shed tears at the ever-intensifying pleasure. His blood-engorged, erect penis also twitched, spilling pre-cum profusely. The areas stained dark red with blood drops became even darker, and the clean parts became transparently wet.

“Huh, Hongjo……”

“Ah, uh, ugh……!”

He muttered reflexively. He was so out of it that he would have answered even if Go Baekwoo had called a different name. Cha Hongjo winced and twisted his waist as his body turned abruptly while his bottom was impaled.

Go Baekwoo, gripping both of Cha Hongjo’s ankles in one hand, moved his hips back and forth again. The sight of Cha Hongjo leaking clear fluid with each thrust was quite a sight. Go Baekwoo, feeling a strange sense of conquest that was both unpleasant and exhilarating, twisted the corners of his lips.

“The women, who say they, like you…… do they know, you’re like this.”

“Huh, ugh, uh…… aah……!”

Thrusting all the way in as he cut him off, Cha Hongjo shook his head as if he couldn’t take it anymore. Beside his face, falling weakly from side to side, lay a single earring that had lost its partner.

“Do they know, you take dick, in your ass, while cumming…… ha?”

“I don’t, ah! I don’t know, fuck……”

Go Baekwoo released Cha Hongjo’s legs and pulled his wrists. Cha Hongjo, helplessly pulled and lifted, was thrust into in a position sitting on top of Go Baekwoo. When they were in missionary or doggy style, Go Baekwoo instinctively controlled the depth of penetration, but it wasn’t easy in this position with Cha Hongjo on top. His breath caught in his throat at the tip thrusting up as if to pierce through to the end.

“Ah! Too, huh, deep…… ah……!”

“Haa, ah……”

His rock-hard thighs and Go Baekwoo’s firm thighs slapped together noisily. Their sweat-slick skin stuck together as if tangled, then peeled apart stickily. Pink flesh peeked out and then went back in along the shaft of flesh moving between the tight space. Fearing the feeling of his insides being crushed and collapsing with Go Baekwoo’s movements, Cha Hongjo curled his fingers and toes. Nail marks were left on Go Baekwoo’s smoothly muscled back.

“Hard?”

“Yeah, ugh, I’m dying!”

“You say it’s hard, but you’re taking it well.”

“Hagh!”

Go Baekwoo, lifting Cha Hongjo’s buttocks and holding them up, suddenly released his grip. Cha Hongjo, impaled all the way to the end of his insides, jerked his back and flinched. Tears streamed from his tightly closed eyes. The erect penis, pointing towards the facing Go Baekwoo, gushed a thin, transparent fluid. Feeling the wetness on his abdomen, Go Baekwoo glanced down for a moment, then looked back at Cha Hongjo’s face and abruptly pushed him down and pulled out his penis.

Cha Hongjo didn’t have the time to be puzzled or catch his breath at the sudden cessation of the act. Go Baekwoo picked up Cha Hongjo, who was barely managing to open his trembling eyelids, and headed towards the window. As soon as he put him down, he supported Cha Hongjo’s underarms, who was collapsing to the floor, and forced him upright. He placed his knee between Cha Hongjo’s thighs to keep him from falling again, and then.

Whoosh—. He opened the curtains. The pouring white natural light illuminated the room. The scarlet light that had softly illuminated the bedroom faded, powerless. Go Baekwoo, staring at the scene of the snow-covered cityscape spreading out below with a strange look in his eyes, grabbed Cha Hongjo’s waist and turned him around. Cha Hongjo grimaced, his face paling in anticipation of what was about to happen. He quickly placed his hand against the glass wall he was facing. His stifled breath fogged the glass. The heavy snowfall couldn’t be hidden even in his blurry vision.

“Fuck, heuk!”

Go Baekwoo thrust into him again from behind. He couldn’t turn around against the force pressing him from behind. The outside scenery was clearly visible through the clean glass. The inside couldn’t be seen from outside, but Cha Hongjo wasn’t in a state to think that far. He felt as if the small heads visible between the gaps in the road, like puzzle pieces, would look up and discover him at any moment. Him, taking a dick in his ass and leaking from the front, just as Go Baekwoo had said.

“……Baekwoo, fuck, huh!”

“Ha, why, are you embarrassed?”

Go Baekwoo whispered, pressing his lips to his ear, and playfully nibbled on his earlobe.

“Ugh! You fucker…… uh…… ah.”

His earlobe burned painfully. It wasn’t because Go Baekwoo was grinding his teeth on it. His cheeks and his chest, pressed against the cold glass, also burned. It was because of the sexual ecstasy permeating his entire body and the immense shame he was experiencing for the first time in his life.

“It’s okay to, sleep with, other people, and have rumors spread……”

“Ugh…… ah…… please, ha, ah……!”

“But not with me?”

“Haa, sob, uh, huh……”

Cha Hongjo closed his eyes. He rested his forehead against the glass wall and bit his lip. Even then, because Go Baekwoo didn’t stop pushing against him, his head repeatedly bumped against the glass. As if he couldn’t bear to see him get hurt after making him feel like he was about to fall, Go Baekwoo placed his hand between his forehead and the glass. Cha Hongjo opened his eyelids at the touch on his forehead and, seeing the prominent blood vessels on the back of his hand, rubbed his cheek against it as if acting cute. And then.

“Uh……”

He bit Go Baekwoo’s wrist. He put strength into his jaw as if to sever the blood vessels running underneath. A coppery taste immediately filled his mouth. Still, he didn’t remove his teeth embedded in the elastic skin. Go Baekwoo, as if to let him do whatever he wanted, didn’t show any signs of pain anymore, only thrusting his hips relentlessly. Every time his glans hit the distinctly narrow end, Cha Hongjo’s legs trembled, and he spilled fluid from the front. The clear liquid that gushed out wet the glass and slid down like rainwater.

“Uh, uh, uh, aah……!”

Cha Hongjo, who had been holding on and holding on, suddenly threw his head back and screamed. Blood stained the teeth visible behind his parted lips.

“Haa, ah……!”

The interval between thrusts shortened to mere seconds. Go Baekwoo, breathing heavily and furrowing his brows, wrapped his arm around Cha Hongjo’s neck. And he pressed his lips against the long, sweat-covered nape of his neck and sucked as if kissing him fervently. Soon, he pulled his lips away from the neck marked with reddish-purple marks and stiffened.

“Ah…… haa……”

“Haa, haa……”

As soon as the force holding him weakened, Cha Hongjo crumbled to the floor. The lingering orgasm remained like an afterimage, swirling through every corner of his body. Even though he was still, his limbs twitched, and his fingers and toes curled. The semen pooled inside leaked out, running down his thighs.

“……Ha.”

Cha Hongjo laughed self-deprecatingly.

After sex, feeling like this…….

“Fucking sucks, shit……”

It was the first time it felt dirty.

He buried his face in his hands and lay down.

“…….”

Go Baekwoo, standing behind him, couldn’t approach him, nor could he turn his back.

A twisted noose kept the two from meeting or parting.

That evening, Tae Pyunghyun received a call from Go Baekwoo and headed back to the hotel.

He wanted to beat Go Baekwoo to a pulp, but taking Cha Hongjo to the hospital was more urgent. Cha Hongjo was burning with fever and unconscious. He didn’t respond whether or not he heard when called, and he couldn’t open his eyes properly. He occasionally mumbled something, but it was completely unintelligible.

He had been suffering from a cold lately, but he should have been getting better. Go Baekwoo remained silent when asked since when Cha Hongjo had been this ill. He said, ‘Call me when Cha Hongjo wakes up,’ and left hurriedly like someone needing the bathroom. Damn bastard, disrespectful brat, son of a bitch. He showered him with a stream of curses under his breath.

🔥

In the dark room, the multicolored shadows spewed from the CRT television flickered. Go Baekwoo’s face, staring at it, was also covered in various colors.

— Yes, Director Kim Doyoung’s new film, <Chronicle of Youth>, which has been receiving high expectations from the public, finished filming last week. I, Lee Minyong, who goes anywhere, joined the last filming of <Chronicle of Youth>! Shall we take a look together?

The reporter guided the viewers to the scene with a lively voice that matched his cheerful hairstyle and expression. The screen transitioned from the indoor set to the filming location of <Chronicle of Youth>.

The reporter, weaving through the bustling scene of staff members moving busily, constantly chattered in a cheerful tone. Go Baekwoo moved his eyes busily, trying to find a certain face from behind the reporter.

They couldn’t have not covered Cha Hongjo, the hot new actor who had become even more famous due to the dating scandal with Yang Seohee. Knowing that, Go Baekwoo couldn’t wait and searched for Cha Hongjo, making futile efforts.

Two days after the dating rumor broke, both Yang Seohee’s and Cha Hongjo’s agencies released statements. The core message of both companies was the same. Their respective actors and the other party were simply colleagues, and the dating rumor was absolutely false.

The camera, which had been panning across the filming location, stopped at one point. Lead actors Kim Hyunwoo and Yang Seohee, checking the script while getting their makeup done. And Cha Hongjo, standing next to Director Kim and monitoring.

The camera first zoomed in on the leads, Kim Hyunwoo and Yang Seohee. The reporter approached them and spoke to them in a cheerful voice. Kim Hyunwoo and Yang Seohee, who hadn’t taken their eyes off the script, pretended to be surprised, laughed, and welcomed the reporter.

Go Baekwoo observed them with a blank expression. Then, he narrowed his eyes as the reporter probed Yang Seohee about the dating rumor. For a moment, Yang Seohee’s eyes on screen wavered, but she maintained her smile and responded with a witty joke. It was a professional, seasoned response.

Next, the camera and reporter turned to Director Kim and Cha Hongjo. The camera briefly showed Director Kim sitting down, then moved up to fully capture Cha Hongjo.

Go Baekwoo’s hand, resting calmly on the armrest of the couch, tightened. Blue veins bulged and wriggled on his white hand.

— Hello, Mr. Cha Hongjo! This is ‘Entertainment News.’

The reporter greeted Cha Hongjo.

— Yes, hello.

Cha Hongjo, as if he hadn’t experienced any turmoil, was sleek and beautiful, and he smiled calmly.

Go Baekwoo leaned forward, staring as if to pierce through the screen.

— <Chronicle of Youth> is your debut work, isn’t it? But Mr. Hongjo’s popularity is skyrocketing even before the film’s release! You know that, right, Mr. Hongjo? How does it feel to become a superstar even before officially debuting?

— It’s surreal…….

Cha Hongjo smiled, one corner of his lips crooked, and brushed his cheek with the back of his hand at the question. He looked both arrogant and shy.

— Am I handsome enough to be a superstar?

And he said in a soft voice. The sound of the reporter and the audience laughing played like background music. The MCs sitting on the indoor set chimed in, saying things like, ‘Someone like Mr. Cha Hongjo is certainly superstar material.’

Go Baekwoo didn’t laugh. He simply lifted the glass on the table and brought it to his lips. The burning hot liquid scorched his insides as it went down.

— It’s because you’re so handsome and witty that you capture the hearts of women! I wasn’t going to mention this, but isn’t the dating rumor with Ms. Seohee also due to Mr. Hongjo’s charms?

The reporter slyly brought up the sensitive topic. Cha Hongjo frowned as if embarrassed, but spoke calmly with a playful smile.

— Senior Yang Seohee is really, a senior from my perspective. So I was flustered when the article came out. I was worried about causing her harm…….

Perhaps because his cheeks and the tip of his nose were red from the cold weather, or perhaps because of the innocent expression he rarely wore, Cha Hongjo on screen exuded a boyish charm.

— Anyway, Senior and I…….

Cha Hongjo, who had been looking at the reporter, shifted his gaze to the camera as he continued speaking. As if responding to Go Baekwoo’s gaze from beyond the screen.

— We are not in any kind of relationship.

That’s right, of course you’re not in any kind of relationship. Just like you and I.

Cha Hongjo’s explanation felt like an announcement directed at him. Go Baekwoo smiled bitterly and took another sip of his drink.

— Yes, I understand. Since you’ve clarified it, I’m sure our viewers won’t misunderstand.

The reporter said, looking alternately at Cha Hongjo and the camera.

— By the way, Mr. Hongjo, filming for <Chronicle of Youth> is over today, isn’t it? I heard it wasn’t easy playing the role of ‘Yeo Jitae.’

— Yes.

— Were there any scenes that were particularly difficult to act, or any memorable scenes?

Cha Hongjo, who had been indifferent to the dating rumor, immediately lost his smile and hardened his expression.

— The last scene was difficult, but…….

A serious expression. That, too, was different from the Cha Hongjo Go Baekwoo knew.

— I can’t talk about it yet. Because it’s the last one.

— It’s a secret, I’m really curious. Alright, then I’ll just have to wait for the release! When is <Chronicle of Youth> being released?

At the question, Cha Hongjo turned around and looked at Director Kim. Although the audio wasn’t picked up, the subtitle ‘Director, when did you say the release date was?’ appeared on the screen. Director Kim replied, and Cha Hongjo turned back.

— He says it’s January 27th.

— Now, viewers. Did you hear that? January 27th! Let’s check it out ourselves at the cinema. I’ll be running there as soon as it’s released.

The reporter waved his arms and legs, pretending to run. The fake laughter of the audience spread, and the reporter thanked Cha Hongjo. The screen quickly changed. It seemed to be Director Kim’s turn for an interview. Go Baekwoo turned off the TV.

“…….”

In the room devoid of color and sound, Go Baekwoo stared at the screen reflecting only darkness, then rubbed his face with his hands. He then habitually tilted his glass, but there was no alcohol left. He placed the empty glass on the table with a thud and simply stared ahead. At the empty space where Cha Hongjo’s afterimage lingered…….

“Cha Hongjo……”

Go Baekwoo, who had been staring at the afterimage, moved his lips slightly.

‘Are you, okay now?’

He couldn’t bring himself to voice the following question. He wasn’t drunk or crazy enough to talk to a Cha Hongjo conjured by his imagination. No, in fact, he wouldn’t have been able to ask even if the real Cha Hongjo was in front of him. How could he, dare he.

Cha Hongjo’s afterimage transformed, following the memories of that day, and finally became the image of him being carried to the hospital, lying deathly still, burning with fever.

It was after the sex, which must have been agonizing for Cha Hongjo, and the lonely silence had ended. No one had suggested it, but they entered the bathroom together and bathed. And then, for a long time. Cha Hongjo’s condition, as he sat on the edge of the bathtub, wasn’t normal. A bloodless face, ragged breathing, a body that didn’t move even slightly in its seated position. He looked like a human-shaped doll submerged in water.

‘Hongjo.’

He called out, but there was no answer. He approached and touched him lightly, and he tilted over powerlessly. Really, for a moment, he thought Cha Hongjo had died.

Since seeing him at the hospital that day, the day the icy wind carried snowflakes, he hadn’t looked for Cha Hongjo once. Because he didn’t have the courage to face Cha Hongjo. Because he wasn’t confident that he wouldn’t force his feelings onto Cha Hongjo.

He thought he could continue to endure, understand, and wait…… but that day, he couldn’t. He couldn’t stand it. He couldn’t understand Cha Hongjo, who refused to settle anywhere, and he lost his patience and got angry. He tormented Cha Hongjo and hurt him.