Actually, It’s a Messy Melodrama Chapter 40

“Is it right for cousins to fight over a mere man? Especially when they bear the Myungjin name.”

If Jin Youngmin had coveted Taejun’s position, there would be nothing more to see. In terms of both ability and character, Jin Youngmin was not someone who could dare to compare himself to Taejun. Chairman Han was also someone who had recognized Jin Youngmin’s capacity early on.

However, if it’s simply a matter of a love quarrel, the story is different. Family members shouldn’t engage in a low-class brawl over a person who doesn’t even fit in with the family.

“Do you understand what your grandfather means?”

“Yes. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it.”

Taejun, who had answered like a fairly dependable grandson, then quickly changed his expression.

“But… you called me today to talk about that? I thought you called because you missed me.”

Taejun knew very well how much his grandfather liked it when he acted affectionately.

“What are you talking about, you brat. Of course I called because I missed you. What about you, you haven’t been paying any attention to your grandfather lately, saying you’re busy?”

“When did I ever not pay attention?”

In any case, Youngmin was no match for him, but in a situation where he didn’t know how things would unfold, there was no harm in winning over Chairman Han’s heart even more.

☂️

“……”

Standing in the middle of a vast garden bathed in beautiful lights, Haeshin stared blankly at the scene unfolding before him. The sight of the splendid mansion, rather than the shabby gate of a house in a shantytown, felt more familiar than strange.

“Huu……”

Haeshin, whose chest suddenly felt tight, let out a long breath. His heart started beating faster and his breathing became ragged, which was not a good sign. It was the prelude to a panic attack.

Han Taejun’s house and Jin Youngmin’s prison were different. Not only was the appearance different, but the emotions Haeshin felt about the space were also completely different. But the moment he stood in the middle of the garden surrounded by a wall, Haeshin’s long-standing trauma was triggered.

‘Help me! Please help me!!’

The screams that could not ultimately overcome the wide space and high walls echoed as if in a chorus. The souls that had died trapped in the massive castle had multiplied by the dozens in the overlapping time and were wandering the netherworld.

The pain that no one remembered, except for the bloodstains that were erased without a trace and the teeth that were knocked out the next day, became a massive tidal wave and instantly swallowed Haeshin.

“No. No, get a grip.”

Haeshin muttered habitually and hit his head with his palms. Thump, thump. This wasn’t the time. The time and place were not right. A ringing sound, beeeee, started in his ears, and that noise soon turned into the various insults and verbal abuse that had been poured on Haeshin.

His vision started to blur, and it was hard to keep his balance. Haeshin, who had sunk to the ground without realizing it, this time slapped his own cheek with all his might. Two, three, the number of slaps increased.

Haeshin now understood his panic attacks, which had become like a chronic illness. He even thought that for someone living such an absurd life, it was a relatively mild illness. But not now. There was no time to be having a mental breakdown.

For the first time in a long while, Haeshin felt the fear of failure. The better the situation got, the more it felt like he was walking a tightrope on a higher cliff. When there was no hope, he could just die, but now that he was slowly seeing a glimmer of hope, Haeshin became more and more afraid of dying.

If he went back to the beginning, who knows when that would be, would he be able to achieve this much again? Would he be able to persuade Han Taejun? Would he be able to meet him? What if he wakes up in Jin Youngmin’s prison for the next dozens of timelines?

What if an opportunity like this is never given again?

The fear he had become so accustomed to that he had forgotten it was reviving more and more vividly.

“Stop, stop……”

Haeshin repeatedly urged himself as if casting a spell and slapped his cheek again. No matter how hard he hit, he couldn’t feel the pain. Now, unable to even open his eyes properly and his body trembling, Haeshin raised his hand to hit his head once more, at that moment.

“Cha Haeshin, what are you doing!”

As his wrist was snatched, a sharp voice tore through the suffocating air that was choking him.

“Huk…… heok……”

“You, are you okay?”

A strong force gripped Haeshin’s shoulders and shook his body. He also felt a hand cupping his cheek. Haeshin still couldn’t open his eyes, but he knew who the owner of that voice was.

“Taejun…… Han Taejun……”

As he uttered the name, a wave of sorrow washed over him. He didn’t want to lose this person. He didn’t want to lose him. At the same time, Haeshin was afraid of Han Taejun. Haeshin’s first failure was Jin Youngmin. And now, Haeshin was scared that this person too would become another one of his failures.

“Open your eyes, Cha Haeshin. Please?”

Han Taejun’s voice wavered beside Haeshin. It was a rough voice, but he could feel the concern in it. Haeshin, unable to open his eyes, reached out and grabbed Taejun’s clothes.

Please, may I not lose you like this. May you, at least, be my hope until the end.

Haeshin prayed earnestly and then lost consciousness.

☂️

“He said there shouldn’t be any particular problems, so you should rest now too, CEO.”

“What, you haven’t left yet?”

Taejun, who had been staring at the pale-faced Haeshin lying down for a long time, was surprised to see Secretary Choi approaching him as he came out into the living room.

He was in a complete daze from the commotion that had occurred in the middle of the night. He couldn’t even clearly remember how he had brought Haeshin, who had eventually fainted after his panic attack, into the house and when he had called the doctor.

It seemed that while Taejun was out of his mind, Secretary Choi had taken care of the situation. All Taejun had done was hold Cha Haeshin in his arms and fret. Suddenly, his face felt hot.

“Mr. Cha Haeshin will be fine.”

Secretary Choi said what needed to be said instead of answering. Taejun nodded with a tired face.

“Well, I guess so. You should go and rest too. You’ve worked hard.”

“Yes. I will see you tomorrow.”

Secretary Choi turned away without any particular questions. It was probably not because he didn’t have any questions, but out of consideration for the tired Taejun.

After waving his hand dismissively to send Secretary Choi off, Taejun lay down on the sofa as he was. He was completely drained of energy.

This was the second time he had seen Haeshin’s panic attack. But today was much more shocking than the first time. The sight of Haeshin, sitting on the floor trembling and yet slapping his own cheek with all his might, was truly horrifying to Taejun.

The sound of slapping cheeks that had echoed in the quiet garden still seemed to ring in his ears. Come to think of it, it made his mood even fouler to realize that the protagonist of all the terrible sounds Taejun had heard in his life was all Cha Haeshin.

“Just how bad was it that the kid is still……”

Taejun bit his lip. Violence usually leaves trauma in a person. In that respect, it was understandable that Cha Haeshin, who had been abused since childhood, had mentally unstable parts.

But to Taejun, Cha Haeshin’s case was severe. To not just fall into a panic recalling bad memories, but to go as far as self-harm. Just how severe was the abuse that he was still going through this?

Moreover, it didn’t seem like there was any particular trigger for Haeshin today. It wasn’t like they had a conversation like last time; he just collapsed suddenly while standing alone in the middle of the garden.

Taejun quietly thought of the Cha Haeshin who existed in a time he didn’t know, and still doesn’t know. The Cha Haeshin in some timeline who met Jin Youngmin again with this kind of trauma.

“Fuck……”

The curse came out automatically. He wanted to go to Jin Youngmin’s house right now and punch him in his disgusting face. It was the first time he had felt such a violent impulse.

Taejun rubbed his face with both hands. Unresolved emotions ran wild in a chaotic mess. His nerves were even more on edge because of the heartbeat that hadn’t calmed down for a while. It was because Taejun’s current physical state was similar to when he felt the premonitory symptoms of a regression.

The situation where he could suddenly regress at any time had never not been stressful, but these days the pressure was even more intense. He had come this far with Cha Haeshin, and if all of this were to become nothing, it would feel more futile than ever.

The fact that he didn’t know when he would return was also a factor. If he was lucky and returned to the time before Youngmin and Haeshin’s marriage like this time, that would be a relief, but what if not? The situation would become even more difficult, and Cha Haeshin would have to bear the terrible time all on his own.

Above all, that fact, the very fact that he could send Cha Haeshin back to that prison again, made Han Taejun insanely anxious. Surprisingly, right now, Taejun was more sincere about preventing Haeshin’s misfortune than ending his own apocalypse.

‘You shouldn’t fall in love with me, though.’

The words Haeshin had once said as a joke pierced Taejun’s mind like a sharp fragment of memory. Cha Haeshin was right. Falling in love with him was the worst thing that could happen right now.