Desires Chapter 3.3 - II. Fever

It was a raging high fever. His consciousness was faint. He liked the cool sensation of the wide back carrying him, so he rubbed his hot, dazed cheek against it. That icily cold and robust scent pulled him beyond the edge of consciousness.

Cha Woojin tapped his cheek as he was losing consciousness. He called his name over and over, helplessly.

“Yeongin-ah, Song Yeongin….”

He wanted to ask Cha Woojin. Did you know from the very beginning that I could not refuse you? I did not even know that I could lean on someone’s back like this.

Because I longed for an embrace….

Sobbing at that one small, warm touch, revealing all of myself. I truly did not know that I could burrow this deeply into someone’s arms, rubbing my cheek like a child.

🌫️

When he opened his eyes, it was another unfamiliar space that Song Yeongin did not know. It felt like he was given a new assignment every time he opened his eyes. He was always giving him new assignments. And solving them was entirely Song Yeongin’s responsibility.

He had lost consciousness in the car while Cha Woojin was at the wheel. The last thing he remembered was the man’s large back. Surely, Cha Woojin must have carried him and placed him here.

The height of the ceiling was unimaginably high. A magnificent, floor-to-ceiling window that was wide open all the way to the top of the ceiling captured his gaze. Outside the window, a vast garden resembling a dense forest was spread out. It was a very artificial forest, one that seemed to have been touched by the hand of a professional landscaper.

An IV needle was stuck in the back of Song Yeongin’s hand. Just like when he had woken up in the morning after they had sex, Cha Woojin was not here, having left him all alone again.

Judging by the flow of time, Song Yeongin could guess that he had been lying unconscious for a long time. He felt the cool touch of the sheets on both his legs. For some reason, his lower body felt empty.

He was wearing nothing on his lower half. Even the large shirt he was wearing was not his own. All he had on was a single, large, long-sleeved t-shirt made of a soft material, baggy enough to cover his buttocks.

When he turned his body, he felt a foreign sensation on his bare skin. What he felt deep inside his hole was the slippery sensation of a soft, moist substance. Come to think of it, the burning sensation he had felt in his lower regions had also subsided at some point. It seemed that an ointment had been applied inside.

Song Yeongin ruthlessly pulled the IV needle, which had not been fully administered, from the back of his hand. And he immediately got up from the bed.

Beneath the large t-shirt that hinted at belonging to someone else were his bare legs, without even underwear. It was an embarrassing and shameful state of dress, to say the least. He had to find something to wear on his lower half. He looked around, but there was nothing in sight that he could wear right away.

Song Yeongin, in his embarrassing attire, absolutely could not bring himself to leave the room, in case someone else was outside the door. He could only wander helplessly around the large room.

To call this place a room just because it had a bed was an understatement; it was a magnificent and massive structure. The common sense of what a typical room is did not apply to this space.

Following a path next to the bedroom and going deep into another separate area, he found it full of things that appeared to be traces of Cha Woojin.

As if playing a game of hide-and-seek where the seeker was counting, Song Yeongin went deep into a far corner for a long time.

Just as Song Yeongin was wandering through the long corridor, the place where his feet stopped, as if by magic, was a giant display cabinet filled with Cha Woojin’s past photos.

The chronicles of the man’s school days and his twenties were displayed in a glass cabinet on one side, full of picture frames. His fingertips stopped at a photo of him in his youthful days, estimated to be around his early twenties. His neat eyes curved faintly like a half-moon.

‘He was young….’

Because he had the appearance of a perfectly mature adult man who wouldn’t bleed a drop even if stabbed, he had never imagined the freshness of his less mature days.

It was still a sculpted, well-defined face, as if carved, but what dwelled within it were the traces of a fresh and vibrant boy.

Most of the pictures were taken with people of other races against a foreign backdrop. There were numerous graduation photos with foreign backgrounds, suggesting he had spent his school days abroad.

Wherever he was, that man was always at the center. He realized that even in the photos, the gazes of others were consistently directed at Cha Woojin. His incomplete youth was so outstanding that he would instantly draw everyone’s attention anywhere.

A tall frame, a splendid and dazzling masculine bone structure, a perfectly handsome appearance that could not help but stand out. His eyes, full of unrefined defiance and overflowing passion, must have completed the perfect adult body he had now.

In fact, those things were still undeniably charming elements that popped out from within this man from time to time.

He just had a more youthful face than he did now, but his innate disposition was no different from his current self. Song Yeongin was blankly scanning the photos one by one, looking at them with interest.

Just then, a heavy, low voice came from behind him.

“I didn’t know you had a hobby of voyeurism.”

At Cha Woojin’s voice, Song Yeongin was startled like a child caught with a hidden toy. In front of him, Song Yeongin was busy hiding a playful smile, like a clueless child.

“To be so lost in looking at something that you didn’t even notice someone coming in, and it’s just….”

Just, I was stealing a glance at your younger days, your brilliant, unripened immaturity. Song Yeongin feigned ignorance for a long time, wondering why he was so embarrassed about being caught.

Cha Woojin was not in the suit attire he had always seen him in. A man in comfortable, flowing clothes was looking at him from behind.

“I thought you had disappeared again, like before.”

“……”

“Do you have some kind of disease that prevents you from staying still in bed?”

Even in casual attire that draped comfortably, his solidly sculpted, sharp frame made it seem as if he were wearing something different from ordinary people.

His body’s intimidating and aggressive nature strangely exuded a very sexual nuance. That belligerent air, which made one feel they would be attacked without warning if they let their guard down for a moment.

Cha Woojin’s gaze clung stickily to Song Yeongin’s entire body. The man blatantly scanned Song Yeongin, who was wearing a large t-shirt that barely covered his buttocks over his bare legs, with his characteristic nonchalant gaze.

“It looks good on you, that shirt….”

He was in the process of learning that he had various expressions besides his cold-blooded face. Cha Woojin knew how to make a face that would make the other person blush without batting an eye.

“I got up and… was looking for pants.”

“……”

“Please give me something to wear.”

The man’s sharp eyes, as if tailored, narrowed slyly.

“I don’t want to….”

Cha Woojin replied with a nonchalant face, without blinking an eye.

“I’m really in a bind, so please don’t joke around.”

The threateningly combative body stood leaning against the wall, scanning Song Yeongin.

The smooth, white skin visible through the large, flowing t-shirt. Adorning it erotically were the red marks of last night’s affair. On Song Yeongin’s neckline, chest, thighs, and entire body, the red and lewd marks left by Cha Woojin’s biting and sucking last night were mottled and rampant.

Cha Woojin clicked his tongue, thinking to himself how relentless he had been to have tormented that body so persistently. However, what looked up at Cha Woojin was a sacred and noble face, the complete opposite of the traces of obscene union.

That neat and clear face, which betrayed the marks of being lewdly bitten and defiled, was surprisingly pure and transcendent. He had the face of an innocent child, as if he had never been sullied, never been penetrated by him.

As Cha Woojin got closer, the meaningless gesture of pulling down the hem of the large shirt to cover his bare lower body continued. A playful glint filled the eyes of the shameless man who was watching it without hesitation. Cha Woojin was smiling the same boyish smile as in the photo Song Yeongin had seen earlier.

Cha Woojin, in his unusually disheveled state, seemed like a completely different person from the one he had known until now.

The fact that the man who had grown into a perfect adult still had traces of a brilliant boy when he smiled was tickling Song Yeongin’s heart in a mess.

Cha Woojin drew closer to the naked Song Yeongin. Song Yeongin, unknowingly stealing glances at him, was discovering the traces of the mischievous and rebellious boy hidden within the arrogant adult.

“Hurry up and give me the pants….”

Cha Cha Woojin was still the same. He smiled. Like the boy in the photo, skillfully curving his eyes full of mischief.

“Make a deal. Tell me what you can give me if I give you the pants.”

Song Yeongin looked up at the intimidating and aggressive man who had come right up to him. Cha Woojin lowered his eyes erotically and said.

“Come here on your own and kiss me. Then, I’ll give you the pants.”

The neat and transcendent face instantly turned bright red. Song Yeongin glared with a look of disbelief. Something like that is too….

“Childish….”

Cha Woojin paid no heed and rattled on.

“Last night, you did things far worse than that to me without hesitation.”

“Is it fun to tease people like this every time?”

At Song Yeongin’s retort, Cha Woojin laughed lowly.

“You say everything you want to say, so quietly.”

Cha Woojin reached out his long arm and stroked Song Yeongin’s pretty forehead.

“You have a tendency to take the easy path in a very difficult way.”

No sooner had the man’s words ended than Song Yeongin stepped up onto the tall, firm body.

Song Yeongin’s lips pressed against Cha Woojin’s. A plumpness touched for an instant and then pulled away as quickly as if it were a lie.

“Now give me the pants….”

It was a small, trembling, beautiful voice.

There was no way those fast and skillful hands would miss Song Yeongin as he tried to flee from his body. Cha Woojin quickly grabbed Song Yeongin’s thin waist. When he was trapped by the wide shoulders and firm chest, Song Yeongin’s body began to struggle.

“You said you’d give me pants! Let go…! of me!”

“I’m not planning on letting you off easy, so do it properly.”

Song Yeongin struggled and looked as if he were about to cry from embarrassment. He was still dazed and not in his right mind.

The air was filled with his scent. It felt as if he were inside his tomb. In a place like this, he could not possibly come to his senses properly.

As if he could not stand it any longer, Cha Woojin roughly turned Song Yeongin’s chin towards him and sucked on his red lips. Trapped in his arms, Song Yeongin obediently received the soft, slow kiss. Their tongues intertwined, and it felt as if the trigger of his brain, which had become a complete mess, was slowly melting away. As if by magic, his legs gave out.

Song Yeongin had never properly kissed before, so he had no basis for comparison, but he could tell that this man was annoyingly good at kissing. When their tongues tangled, his mind went blank. Even the indiscriminate and violent acts became numb, as the agonizing pain and sensations were dulled as if he were anesthetized. His heart was pounding painfully, as if it would explode.

“…Hah, I think you’re the one playing with people, not me….”

Cha Woojin let out a rough breath. And then, as if regretting it, he sucked on the red, plump lips once more. He caressed the mottled body, tracing the lewd marks he himself had made countless times last night.

“Ha, eut, stop…!”

When he gasped, struggling for breath, he finally pulled his lips away. Cha Woojin silently looked down at Song Yeongin’s lips, glistening with saliva. The man’s hand fiddled with the wet, plump lips.

“When you make that face… I want to shove anything and everything in here and make you bite it.”

What kind of face was he talking about? His mind was just dazed because he was being rummaged through so much that he could not even breathe.

The man, who was holding his waist and kissing him, pulled Song Yeongin’s perky buttocks towards him. He shamelessly pressed his large, heavy, and erect penis tightly against Song Yeongin’s body. Cha Woojin’s member was growing more ferocious in volume.

Song Yeongin, feeling the man’s hideous member pressing and poking him hard against his bare lower body, struggled, startled.

Cha Woojin kneaded the round, firm buttocks. The more Song Yeongin struggled, the more his buttocks rubbed against his groin, making his erection deeper and harder.

“Ugh, hngh…! I said let go of me…!”

When Song Yeongin shouted with all his might and resisted desperately, Cha Woojin stopped his hand that was groping his buttocks and roughly hugged Song Yeongin’s back from behind.

“Haa… Yeongin-ah.”

He had only called his name.

That every time you let out a low breath and call my name, a torrent of countless agonizing worries that feel like they’re about to burst comes rushing in…

Do you know that, too?

Song Yeongin’s panting breath hung in the air. Rubbing their bodies together and even his feeble resistance was too strenuous, so he was heaving and panting in Cha Woojin’s arms, his back rising and falling.

Cha Woojin, hugging the trembling Song Yeongin from behind, said in a low voice.

“Calm down. I have no intention of forcing myself on you.”

The sound of breathing in his embrace gradually subsided. Cha Woojin carefully released the finally calm Song Yeongin from his arms.

His member, where blood had pooled hard between his groin, was still jutting out so prominently that it seemed it would pierce through the man’s pants.

“…I can’t… do it anymore.”

“……”

“I, it hurts too much….”

“I know.”

Cha Woojin whispered into the neat and chaste eyes.

“When you were unconscious, my personal doctor came by.”

“……”

“He clicked his tongue with me standing in front of him. I became the most shameless man in the world.”

“……”

“And I personally followed his instructions and applied ointment deep inside your hole.”

Song Yeongin slowly rolled his eyes, then bowed his head deeply in embarrassment. He was saying that while he was unconscious, he had taken off his pants, spread his buttocks, inserted his fingers inside, and applied ointment.

His face burned with shame, but it was true that thanks to that, the stinging and burning sensation that had made it difficult to even walk had eased up considerably.

A messy passion clung to the man’s languid eyes. Cha Woojin let out a loud, low breath into the air as if to cool his lust and ecstasy. It seemed he was trying to calm his own member, which was writhing ferociously. And then, as if by magic, he said with a nonchalant expression.

“Follow me. I’ll give you something to wear.”

He was composed, but through the sound of his breath, shaky and wet with passion, he could tell. Cha Woojin was a man who could control himself. He could certainly exercise restraint if he willed it. It was just that last night, he had deliberately chosen not to, with him.

🌫️

This place, he said, was Cha Woojin’s private residence. It was his personal estate, where only Cha Woojin came and went and moved about. Song Yeongin, overwhelmed by the scale of the grand mansion, had to hurry and follow behind the man in front of him, lest he lose him.

The place Cha Woojin led Song Yeongin to was a large dining space. In the modern dining room, constructed with luxurious natural marble and geometric modules, there were several other hands moving about busily besides them.

All kinds of food were already set on the dining table. It was truly a feast. A middle-aged woman who was setting down a side dish, noticing Cha Woojin and Song Yeongin, hastily disappeared.

Cha Woojin did not even exchange a small glance of greeting with the employees who worked in this house. The servants were simply busy watching Cha Woojin’s every move, and everything was perfectly set up before Cha Woojin moved, and the servants had already quickly vanished without a trace before he acted or executed.

As if it were the absolute law of this space, everyone acted as shadows, like people who did not exist, avoiding his gaze.

“Sit.”

He muttered lowly, as if commanding Song Yeongin, who was standing there blankly.

Only after the helpers had all disappeared through the inner passage of the kitchen far away did Song Yeongin finally pull out a dining chair opposite Cha Woojin and sit down.

The straight bridge of his nose and his jawline were directed at Song Yeongin.

“I did a blood test. They said you have malnutrition.”

The sun was already setting, yet this was his first meal. Skipping meals had become such a long-standing habit that he did not even know it was uncomfortable. In fact, he often found the feeling of his stomach being full to be uncomfortable.

Fortunately, since he started working at L’Acqueur, he had been obliged to have his meals with his colleagues. However, lately, under the pretext of having no appetite, he had often been skipping even that.

Even now, he felt no desire to fill himself up and feel full. He did not want to be full. He did not want to enjoy it either. Nothing should be full inside him. Song Yeongin only ate just enough to stay alive, without being greedy.

Ever since that incident….

That is, from the day he witnessed his mother’s death, satiety or ingestion were among the phenomena his body rejected. He thought that some part of him might be severely broken.

Cha Woojin was waiting for Song Yeongin to take a bite, with the prepared meal in front of him. Unable to bear his pressing gaze, Song Yeongin reluctantly took a spoonful of the clear soup placed before him. Only then did Cha Woojin also pick up his side dishes.

Song Yeongin thought that sitting across from him and having a meal like this was more surreal than the fact that he had had sex with him.

From the first time he saw him at Jimil, he was nothing more than a mere servant for them. Until just a short while ago, Song Yeongin was no different from one of those servants who had just prepared the meal and disappeared through the inner passage.

Because he had always thought of Cha Woojin as a distant being living in a different world from him, he had never once imagined that he would be sitting across from him having a meal like this.

“Malnutrition in this day and age. Are you eating properly at your workplace? It’s a restaurant, for crying out loud.”

When Cha Woojin brought up L’Acqueur, Song Yeongin was suddenly reminded of the owner who had called him in and said he would not make an issue of his absence and to be flexible with his work hours. Surely, the owner’s suspicious behavior must be related to Cha Woojin. Otherwise, such an illogical thing could not be possible.

“……To what extent are you involved?”

Cha Woojin stared at Song Yeongin as if to ask what he was talking about.

“The owner personally told me that he would not make an issue of my absence.”

“Is that so?”

Cha Woojin had his characteristic nonchalant face, as if it were nothing surprising.

‘Don’t tell me….’

When his thoughts reached that point, Song Yeongin began to suspect everything.

“Don’t tell me, me becoming a full-time employee is also related to Director Cha Woojin?”

The man, his smile gone, did not deny Song Yeongin’s question in any way.

“That’s my way. Just as Mr. Song Yeongin has Mr. Song Yeongin’s way.”

Song Yeongin sighed. He could not understand what on earth Cha Woojin wanted to do with him. Whether he wanted to control him and play with him like a piece on a game board. Whether he needed a partner for sex whenever he wanted.

Whatever it was, Song Yeongin needed a definition for this relationship. That was why that name suddenly popped out. The name of another person for whom a definition was needed in his mind.

“Then… what about Ms. Shin Hwayeon?”

His long eyes narrowed their perimeter, and he sneered coldly.

“I didn’t expect her name to come out of your mouth.”

“Did you maintain this kind of method with her too?”

Cha Woojin put down his utensils and wiped his lips with the personal napkin placed to his left. And then, as if the meal was over, he glared sharply at Song Yeongin and said.

“I don’t know what you want to hear, but we are not in the kind of relationship you are thinking of.”

“……”

“She one-sidedly wants me, and she threatens me. I do not interfere with her, nor do I contact her separately like I do with you. Because I’m not curious at all.”

“……”

“She said she wants to be thoroughly used by me. That she would give me everything her father, a powerful next presidential candidate, and her background could offer.”

“……”

“So I told her I would consider it.”

“……”

“Now, what else are you curious about? …Should I tell you the stories of the other women who say they will be a stepping stone for me.”

Song Yeongin, who was sitting opposite him, just blinked his transcendent eyes slowly without answering. His elegant and clear face, like a blank sheet of paper containing nothing, was merely listening to his words quietly.

To Cha Woojin, who was responding with a cold and heartless gaze, Song Yeongin belatedly opened his mouth.

“I just… if you were dating Ms. Shin Hwayeon, then I shouldn’t be doing this with you….”

“If you want, I won’t meet her.”

Song Yeongin’s eyes, which had been only transcendent, wavered steeply.

“If you want that, I will do so. It doesn’t matter since I have no relationship with Shin Hwayeon anyway.”

At the man’s resolute answer, Song Yeongin seemed to be contemplating something deeply, slowly rolling his neat eyes. His eyes, unskilled at hiding his inner thoughts, answered nonchalantly after a long silence, as if turning away from Cha Woojin like a stranger.

“It has nothing to do with me….”

Cha Woojin said with a coldly hardened face.

“Insolent.”

His pitch-black, cool eyes, which had grown chilly, took on a murderous glint. It was an authoritative and heartless tone, as if to crush the person opposite him.

“From now on, make sure not to ask me about things that have nothing to do with you.”

“……”

“By now, you should have figured out just how much I’m letting you off the hook.”

He says he is letting me off the hook, even though he violated and took my body like a beast all night long.

Until now, everything must have been natural for him, and there would not have been a single thing he lacked. He was a man who unhesitatingly spoke of how he was surrounded by women begging him to take them, saying they would become a stepping stone for him to climb on.

He was proudly admitting with his own mouth that at the feet of that apex predator, who held countless options to take, were sacrificial lambs volunteering themselves as tribute. It was nothing surprising. I know the look of longing and adoration they reveal when they look at you at the Asht and Matteo’s banquet.

His words that he was letting me off the hook sounded as if he, their emperor, had bestowed a favor upon insignificant me. So he tells me to grasp my place with arrogant eyes, saying he is letting me off the hook.

‘When this worthless interest disappears, a useless object like you can be thrown away at any time.’

The man sitting in front of me now was clearly implying this to me. Song Yeongin wanted to scoff at Cha Woojin, who was putting on a cold-blooded, straight face with an arrogant expression.

If that is the case, then before I am miserably thrown away, I will first escape from your paltry empire.