The Idol Who Returned from Hell Chapter 168

It’s finally coming out.

The most difficult moment while filming 〈Dancing with Puppers〉.

And the fundamental reason I decided to appear on this program.

“……Please, I hope it came out well.”

“Don’t worry. Since we knew this topic was sensitive, we did some monitoring beforehand.”

“Phew.”

CENTIX was gathered in the living room as usual.

The members who hadn’t laughed much even at the ridiculous scenes I made with Cerberus were now watching Ma Si-hyeok on screen with no change in expression.

[School violence…… you experienced it?]

[Yes. I experienced it for over two years during middle school.]

[No, for what reason exactly? Since Si-hyeok, you don’t seem like a small type at all, so they bullied you just like that?]

[……There’s no reason for hating someone. Back then I was taller and bigger than other students too, but they said I was tall but slow in my actions, so they wanted to try bullying me.]

[That’s absurd.]

Ma Si-hyeok gave a bitter smile toward the MC who looked incredulous.

[Actually, when I was appearing on 〈ISL 2〉, there was a similar situation. That time it wasn’t as a victim but there were false accusations as a perpetrator, which was difficult, but fortunately it was somehow resolved well……]

[Then wouldn’t it have been resolved faster if you had said this at that time?]

[I didn’t want to buy…… sympathy votes.]

I quietly listened to Ma Si-hyeok’s lines.

When I suggested appearing on 〈Dancing with Puppers〉 together, Ma Si-hyeok was in a completely dejected state.

His body moved out of habit, but mentally he had already taken a big hit.

Along with that, confusion was currently being caused among fans as well.

I had judged that the only way to resolve all of this was to have Ma Si-hyeok directly face reality.

Why he had avoided bringing up this story all this time.

Why he had kept hiding traces of the past until now.

There was no sharp method other than him breaking through the situation by stating those reasons himself.

[The reason I decided I wanted to become an idol was simple. Because I wanted to regain the confidence that had fallen as low as it could go from experiencing school violence. I thought that if I did my best on stage, fans would support me regardless of what my past was like. So I wanted to go on survival auditions and clash with everything I had as I was. To escape from the past and be recognized only by my skills.]

The biggest reason Ma Si-hyeok hadn’t wanted to publicize this incident all along.

Why he kept saying he wouldn’t sue the perpetrator who was like a thorn in his eye even though he was the victim is now revealed.

[You said earlier that you didn’t want to get sympathy votes?]

[I wanted people to look only at my skills. Because I practiced hard enough to succeed as an idol. I came on 〈ISL 2〉 to achieve my dream of debut honorably with only my skills. But if the fact that I was a school violence victim was revealed in the process of clarifying things…… I felt that even people who hadn’t seen my stages could easily throw sympathy votes. Looking at the Ma Si-hyeok who experienced school violence rather than the Ma Si-hyeok on stage.]

“This guy spoke well.”

“That was the biggest reason. If his ranking had gone up from getting showered with sympathy votes, that could have been a problem in its own way.”

Kang Seon-woo and Seong-hwi both nodded in understanding at the same time.

[And when stories related to school violence came up, it felt like those memories I wanted to forget were reviving. I want to live confidently, forgetting all of this…… but whenever stories from the past came up, seeing my body react automatically made me realize I was still living trapped in that shadow. So I kept hiding this matter, trying not to mention it even more.]

[That’s right. Even if you try to live forgetting it, when you face the past, those memories will naturally come back whether you like it or not.]

Ma Si-hyeok, who continued talking, had his lips trembling.

The sight of him clenching both hands so tightly that his knuckles turned white was also captured on camera.

Seeing that, Yu Ha-woon playfully tapped his shoulder and asked.

“Brother, at least you didn’t cry, right? I was worried you might cry.”

“Brother Si-hwan kept asking me repeatedly before recording started. He said I had to control my emotions as much as possible while talking.”

I quietly nodded at Ma Si-hyeok’s words.

This method of him directly talking about his painful memories and explaining the situation is quite good in its own way.

But if he ended up shedding tears, it could backfire—it’s a double-edged sword.

Actually, in my previous life too, there were quite a few celebrities who gave tearful explanations to reverse unfavorable public opinion.

Even when they logically explained how much pressure they received and how difficult it was during the controversial situation, only the scene of them crying was highlighted.

Some people threw even harsher criticism, saying ‘They’re forcing tears to gain sympathy.’

Of course, Ma Si-hyeok’s case is completely different, but I didn’t want to create situations that could deal more mental damage.

So I had earnestly pleaded with Ma Si-hyeok beforehand, like blocking it in advance.

No matter what happened, to control his emotions as much as possible and not cry.

Even when listening to this scene live on screen, my heart was anxious, but Ma Si-hyeok didn’t show tears until the end.

MC Lim Kyung-oh, who had been listening to the story while giving appropriate reactions, suddenly asked a question that came to mind.

[I never would have known that bright-seeming Si-hyeok had such pain. On one hand, I’m also worried about whether it’s okay to bring up past stories in such a public place like this. Is there a particular reason you mentioned this topic on our broadcast?]

[After debuting as CENTIX, I felt every moment that I’m not alone anymore. Not only Brother Si-hwan next to me now and the other members remaining at the dorm. Most of all, having fans who always give unchanging support was such a huge comfort. I was afraid that those precious people might get hurt because of me……]

Ma Si-hyeok, who had been unconsciously holding and petting Cerberus, took a deep breath.

[I wanted to tell the fans that I’m okay now. Until just recently, I was scared of my past becoming known to the world, but I felt that if I couldn’t overcome this, I would always be stuck in place. So I came on the broadcast like this…… I wanted to say with my own mouth that ‘I’m okay.’ So that it can become part of me that I can proudly face and acknowledge, rather than a wound I just want to avoid.]

Everyone was quietly watching TV, so silence filled the living room.

When Ma Si-hyeok’s words filled with determination came through the speakers, Chae Ha-ru, who was sitting right next to him, said a word.

“Thank you for enduring it, Brother.”

It was a really short sentence, but it contained many emotions.

[When I first heard it, my heart ached a lot, but hearing you clearly state your will to overcome it yourself like this gives me new feelings. As Si-hyeok just mentioned, fans must have been very upset.]

[I always wanted to only tell them good things and show them how I’m working harder in return for the love they gave us…… I felt so sorry for causing unnecessary worry and making them anxious because of me.]

[Ah, if you say that, I think fans will wave their hands saying no! They’ll say as long as our Si-hyeok is okay, everything else is fine.]

[Haha, if they say that, that would be fortunate for me……]

[Ah. Come to think of it, there’s one piece of news we can preview only on 〈Dancing with Puppers〉, right Si-hyeok?]

“Oh, this is coming out now?”

“This should be the best mood-reversal element!”

When Ryu Si-hwan on screen spoke with an intentional tone, the other guys got excited too.

I smiled slightly while looking at the younger members who were sparkling with eyes like kindergarteners.

‘It was good to quickly come up with the idea and get confirmation.’

[News to preview here, Si-hwan? This is content I haven’t heard beforehand either!]

[Actually, I only heard the definite news a few days ago. So we were keeping it among ourselves and then decided to spoil it once on 〈Dancing with Puppers〉.]

[You keep making people curious. Please reveal it quickly! I think I’m going to get dizzy.]

Ryu Si-hwan, who had been grinning mischievously, waved Cer’s cute little paws while delivering the announcement.

[MILLENNIUM everyone, CENTIX’s first fan meeting is scheduled to be held soon! We want to have fun with MILLENNIUM quickly, so please wait just a little.]

[We’ll also work hard to prepare until then so we can show you good things!]

The identity was CENTIX’s first fan meeting.

We still don’t have enough original songs to hold our first solo concert yet. We’d need to release at least our first full album to put together a sufficient setlist and create a high-quality concert.

Fan meetings are different. They require fewer songs than concerts and have slightly shorter running times too.

It’s an opportunity to connect with fans at a close distance and a good moment to officially announce CENTIX’s elevated status.

“Hearing the fan meeting news directly like that makes it feel real.”

“Right. Actually, I still sometimes dream that I’m trapped in 〈ISL 2〉.”

“Brother Seon-woo, that’s pretty horrifying?”

“That’s why I wake up with my body trembling?”

Actually, when the higher-ups at Rave Entertainment brought up the fan meeting, I wondered if I heard wrong.

Even though they’ve been supporting CENTIX-related activities reasonably well, there’s still something not quite trustworthy about them, so my expectations were still low.

When 〈Find Me〉 activities were approaching the end and it was time to think about the next comeback, they immediately proposed the fan meeting card to boost fandom firepower first.

Of course, I’ll know for sure once detailed matters are decided.

‘The income from fan meetings and concerts is decent too, so settlements can be pulled forward quickly.’

For some reason, the conversation I had with Chae Ha-ru back then remained uncomfortably in my head.

Even though he said he didn’t mind, it still bothers me.

While the members were expressing their anticipation for the fan meeting, 〈Dancing with Puppers〉 was gradually moving toward the ending.

I turned on my phone to monitor the most important thing.

‘Hmm.’

The IdolNet reactions I always check first were quite good.

This is where Ma Si-hyeok’s scar controversy started and caused this whole mess.

A post summarizing Ma Si-hyeok’s full statement from MILLENNIUM who watched the 〈Dancing with Puppers〉 main broadcast had gone up as a real-time hot post.

The public opinion in the comments below was also in the ideal direction I had hoped for.

‘Focusing on why there was no mention of it all this time and how he wants to change by revealing this, rather than focusing on saying it was difficult, was effective.’

When mentioning such past events, creating forced emotion has the opposite effect. As I said earlier, if tears are shed, people attack saying they’re squeezing out tears.

However, Ma Si-hyeok blocked such gaps by talking about the will to change for fans and his own development in bringing this up.

MILLENNIUM, who heard him say he’s okay now, was calming their shocked hearts.

At the same time, the trolls who had made disgusting comments also disappeared since there was nothing to particularly nitpick.

‘This put out all the urgent fires.’

Ma Si-hyeok’s school violence victim-related issue also shifted the flow by hitting the announcement that CENTIX’s first fan meeting was approaching soon.

Now all that’s left for us is to just faithfully focus on our main job and prepare diligently as always.

I was about to put my phone away, thinking I could finally cool my head a bit.

[Senior Joo Han-ul: I watched the broadcast just now]

‘……’

Contact came at the perfect timing from the person who requires caution.