The Bad Life – Chapter 1.1 – Chapter 1: The Boys on the Top Floor

Author: nicotine

The school was once a monastery. However, the time it functioned as a monastery was only for about a hundred years after it was built in the early 17th century.

In the late 18th century, the monastery’s role changed to that of a school, and it transformed into a private institution where only the children of aristocratic families or wealthy merchants could enroll by paying expensive tuition.

The school was located in a small rural town called Bluebell, in the northern province of Folkgrand. It was a place that was consistently cold, except for three or four months out of the year. A radius of 15 kilometers was surrounded by a dense forest, and with no private houses nearby, it was a completely isolated and remote place. All students lived in dormitories. The faculty and other school officials also lived in the school’s housing or in Gorun, which was an hour and a half drive from Bluebell.

The school was a quiet and peaceful place. The well trained teachers skillfully handled the students, and since the school’s rules were not strict, disputes between the staff and students were rare. The students, having experienced similar family and educational backgrounds, were familiar and comfortable with one another. Since it was not uncommon for someone to transfer in or out, they were also relatively open to accepting outsiders.

Perhaps this place was akin to Thoreau’s Walden. In fact, in the forest surrounding the school, there was a swamp that everyone called <Kelly>. The older teachers called it a lake. It seemed it had been a real lake in the past, but now it could only be called a swamp.

The above was a brief impression from the month after I transferred to that school.

I only found out at the age of fifteen that I was the illegitimate child of the movie actress Julia Goodman. Julia Goodman was a classic beauty with luscious brown hair and chestnut eyes, a famous actress who had won the Oscar for Best Actress twice. She was now only thirty three, and a few years ago she had married and had three year old twins.

The fact that such a woman had a child who was already fifteen was a clandestine secret that even I, her son, had not known. Perhaps I could have gone my whole life without knowing. The reason I was able to learn about her was because she appeared after my father died in a traffic accident.

Julia did not even attend my father’s funeral. It was only about two months after my father was buried that Julia came to get me. Julia and I were strikingly similar. However, unlike Julia, who was always neatly groomed through constant care, I had just gone through puberty and had suddenly shot up in height like a beanpole, gauntly skinny with sallow cheeks. So, when we first met, we thought the only resemblance we shared was our hair and eye color. But during the five or so years I spent in the jaw dropping mansion Julia owned, I too gradually changed.

As a result of enjoying an affluent life for several years, we finally came to resemble each other so much that anyone would recognize us as mother and son if we stood side by side. At that point, Julia decided she could no longer live in the same house with me. When I was no longer an age to be under a parent’s wing, Julia sent me to that school. On paper, I was still an orphan with no parents. The guardian’s name was also listed as Julia’s secretary. Shortly after arriving at the school, I found out that it was filled with kids in situations similar to mine.

In a sense, it was not a school but a kind of place of exile. Just as my very existence was a weakness for my mother, the students at that school were all blemishes on their parents or families. Someone’s illegitimate child, a troublesome offspring who committed a crime at a young age, the youngest child pushed aside in an inheritance dispute. They ranged from young students of sixteen to those of a fledgling college age like me, who had just turned twenty.

We had all been dragged here as if in exile to this rural backwater school under the pretext of preparing for entrance to Oxford, art school, or, in rare cases, a Grande École, and began our dormitory life. For that reason, the school frequently accepted transfer students. By the same token, it was also full of students trying to escape this place, so transfers and dropouts were equally frequent.

That was the reality. Who would cast off a precious child to an obscure, remote country school as if sending them into exile? Unless that child was a useless prodigal and a thorn in their side, there was no reason not to find another way, whether it was hiring a private tutor in London for their education or getting them into a university through a hefty donation.

The students of this school were useless prodigals and thorns in the side who attacked their own parents. I was no exception.

It was April.

Even for April, it was terribly cold. I arrived in Bluebell with all my belongings packed into a single trunk. It was six o’clock in the evening. I was wearing only my school uniform without a coat, so my teeth soon began to chatter.

After I sat on my trunk and waited for about an hour in front of Bluebell’s old pub, the Cadillac sent from the school finally arrived late. The driver was kind. He willingly loaded my trunk into the car and opened the back seat door for me.

As I got into the car filled with warm air and sank my body into the soft, plush cream colored seat, a wave of drowsiness washed over me. My frozen, stiff body slowly thawed. I watched the pointy leaved trees flashing by the window, and at some point, I dozed off. The driver let me sleep until we arrived at the school.

The school was magnificent. It was so grand I thought I might get lost. The main school building, which still used the old monastery structure, was only two stories high, but it was enormous in area and had very high ceilings. The dormitory was some distance away from the school, looking as if it were slightly buried in the forest. In addition to that, there were stables, a polo field, a cricket ground, and tennis courts, all well maintained, but I wondered how anyone could play games in this cold region.

I left my trunk at the door and walked into the school that had once been a monastery. It must have been after classes had ended, as the inside of the school was not just quiet but eerie. The air itself seemed frozen due to the cold weather, and it was incredibly still. I walked slowly so my footsteps would not make a sound. Nevertheless, my footsteps echoed loudly off the empty stone walls. A ceiling painting depicting Jesus with a halo and his disciples continued all the way to the end of the corridor. It was ornate and beautiful. I moved along with my head tilted back, not even realizing my neck was getting sore.

It was still a bit cold, so my shoulders were hunched, but as I crossed the corridor, my tension eased and I slowly began to like the school. I especially liked how quiet it was. Even the stillness, the feeling of isolation, paradoxically gave me a sense of stability.

Soon, the corridor ended, and I faced a large, thick wooden door. When I opened the door and went in, warm light and the sound of voices flowed out. While the staff searched for my documents, I sat meekly on a chair and rubbed my cold hands. After completing the transfer procedures and signing various consent forms, a staff member told me the dormitory room I was assigned to.

As I took the documents and key the staff member handed me and turned to leave, she abruptly added a word from behind me.

I looked back at her. She was holding out a green scarf to me. I took the scarf from her and looked at the name tag on her chest. It was Anna. She was the first person whose name I learned at this school.

The driver took me to the dormitory. It was a walkable distance from the main building to the dormitory, but it would have been difficult to drag the trunk.

The dormitory was also a stone building. After passing through a garden decorated with statues and a fountain and entering inside, a staff member who appeared to be the housemaster was waiting for me in a spacious hall lit by electric lamps. I was assigned to the top floor. On the way up to the fourth floor, the housemaster and I shared the load of carrying the trunk.

The housemaster was about a hand’s span shorter than me (in fact, most people were about a hand’s span shorter than me) and was a man with a stern impression, his black hair neatly combed back. As we climbed the stairs, he gave me some instructions.

I asked.

The housemaster replied.

We arrived in front of the room where I would be living for the next two years. On the fourth floor, there was a drawing room and a spacious balcony, and it was divided into a left corridor and a right corridor with only two doors. We went to the door in the left corridor. The housemaster set down the trunk, said his farewells, and immediately turned to leave. His footsteps were silent on the carpeted floor.

I took out the key I had received from the staff member. The bronze key was bluish and cold. I opened the door with the key and entered the room. A living room with a fire roaring in the fireplace unfolded before my eyes. It felt more like a cozy home than a dormitory. A boy who had been sitting on the sofa in front of the fireplace looking at a laptop turned his head to look at me. The boy’s eyes widened.

The boy said.

<You’re late, aren’t you? You were supposed to be here around six.>

I did not answer.

<…….>

The boy asked.

We? Before I could even ask, two other boys appeared from a room. The blond boy said.

<Ah, it’s you, right? Raymond, right? Hello. I’m Hugh.>

The boy who introduced himself as Hugh strode over and offered a handshake. I silently took his hand and shook it. The other boy who had followed Hugh extended his hand.

<Hello. I’ll be sharing a room with you.>

I stared at the boy and shook his hand.

There were a total of three boys living with me. The boy who was on the laptop on the sofa, <George>, the blond boy, <Hugh>, and the one sharing my room, <Simon>.

<Simon> was as tall as I was and had broad shoulders. He would wake up at the crack of dawn and go out for a jog as soon as the main door opened. When he returned to the dormitory, he would even bring back my share of breakfast from the dining hall. But he was not very talkative. Since I also had a quiet personality, we got along quite well.

Simon was always impeccably neat. He would comb his chocolate colored hair neatly, dress immaculately in a wrinkle free uniform that had been hanging on a hanger, and then head to school wearing polished black shoes. He never let his posture slip either. He always stood with his shoulders back and his spine straight, his expression inscrutable. In my eyes, he seemed like a real eccentric.

The fellow was not one to study diligently. He was well versed in etiquette and manners, but he was more interested in theater than in his studies. He put a lot of effort into the drama club and always watched movies in the dormitory. However, for a boy who read plays by Beckett or Ibsen, his taste in movies was for Hollywood sentimentality dramas.

I would often lie with my feet propped on the headboard of my bed and watch the movies Simon had playing on his desk monitor. At first, Simon watched movies with headphones on, but once he noticed that I sometimes watched from behind him, at some point he started taking off his headphones and watching with the speakers on.

<Hugh> was a few centimeters shorter than Simon and me but had a solid build. It made sense, as he was a promising swimmer who had even won a junior championship in the past. He had a broad shouldered and smoothly muscular physique. He still swam at the school pool, but he no longer competed. He was now studying with the goal of getting into Cambridge.

Hugh had a very sociable and cheerful personality. I was a bit closer to Hugh than to Simon, who shared my room. In fact, Hugh was close with everyone. He exchanged warm greetings even with the stern looking housemaster, was on playful terms with almost all the students, and was on friendly terms not only with the teachers but also with the school’s administrative staff, so he frequently received gifts from someone.

He was not one to be bound by rules and had a rather free spirited personality, so everything about him, from his attire to his usual conduct, was relaxed and easygoing. He often went to other rooms to hang out boisterously and sometimes only returned to our room close to midnight. While living with Hugh, I became accustomed to the sight of him lying shirtless in front of the fireplace, writing a paper or reading a book. If I had to pick one among George, Hugh, and Simon, I liked Hugh the most. I especially liked that he smiled often.

<George> was the tallest among us but also the skinniest. With his constantly pale face and light colored blue eyes, he gave off a frail and introverted impression. He did not even go to school often. He did not wear the school uniform either. He was always in a black sweater and wrinkle free cotton pants, wearing slippers, sitting on the sofa in front of the fireplace and tinkering with his laptop.

I had no idea what he was doing. Judging by the fact that his laptop screen was filled with some kind of complex programs and equations I did not understand, he seemed to be a very skilled programmer or hacker. One time I went into the room George and Hugh shared, and there were three or four monitors on the desk and several computer towers, so after that, I just concluded that George must be that kind of person. I was someone who could barely play card games on a computer.

Although he was completely immersed in computers, George was quite talkative. He would meticulously respond to Hugh’s chattering, and they surprisingly got along well, so I could fully understand why they shared a room. Since George was a habitual absentee, he and I had almost no point of contact at first, but it was thanks to his way with words that we managed to break the ice. It was George who told me everything about Simon, Hugh, and himself. And about one other person as well.

Now, we need to learn about <Jerome>.

From the moment I started living in the dormitory, I had no choice but to learn about <Jerome>. <Jerome> was always in our room at four o’clock in the afternoon. He would sit across from George in front of the fireplace and have conversations. Sometimes he talked with Simon, and on days when Hugh returned early, he would chat with Hugh as well. All of it was idle conversation. They would talk about things that happened at school, gossip about politicians or celebrities, and often discuss soccer or games. And then, at exactly six o’clock, he would return to his own room.

<Jerome>’s room was on the same floor as ours, in the right corridor. <Jerome> had the room to himself. George said it was because of a shortage of students, but I did not believe him. From the first time I saw <Jerome>, I instinctively disliked him. He was about the same height and build as me, but for some reason, he gave a stronger and larger impression than I did. His equestrian physique was slim and agile, and his hands were slightly larger than an average person’s.

Because he rode horses every day, he often came dressed in riding attire. He wore white riding pants that clung tightly to his legs, black boots, and a white shirt with the collar unbuttoned, carrying a leather riding crop. I particularly disliked that crop. <Jerome> would often, as a joke, lift Hugh’s chin with the leather loop at the end of the crop, and I found that sight extremely uncomfortable.

That is not to say that <Jerome> went around brandishing the crop. It seemed he would come to our room to hang out in that same attire after he finished riding, and the crop was usually kept calmly on his thigh, or he would just habitually finger the leather loop. Nevertheless, because of <Jerome>’s strong impression, I never liked the fact that he was holding a crop.

<Jerome> tried to be friendly with me a few times. He greeted me first and would try to talk to me when we ran into each other at school. However, when I made it a point to keep my distance and not get any closer than necessary, <Jerome> soon caught on and stopped trying to close the gap.

But sometimes, when I was sitting on the sofa reading a book and looked up, my eyes would meet <Jerome>’s as he stared at me intently. At times like that, I would be the first to close my book and flee into my room. Simon was usually watching a movie in the room, so for some reason, I would feel a sudden rush of relief and end up watching the movie with Simon.

<Jerome> was an uncomfortable presence like that. With his smooth, inscrutable face and the way he hogged an entire room to himself, he was a suspicious and questionable fellow in every way.

Except for the fact that I did not like <Jerome>, my new school life was going smoothly.

After my father died and I was living with Julia, I was not able to attend school. I was homeschooled and spent most of my time at home. Julia absolutely did not want the world to find out about me. I was bewildered by the luxurious life that had suddenly been thrust upon me, and being deeply grieved after losing my father, I acted as Julia wished.

At first, there was a period when I relied on Julia, if only on her. I was afraid that if even she abandoned me, I would truly be all alone in this world. However, as time passed, the grief over my father’s death also wore away, and I was finally able to realize the reality of my situation.

Ever since my father died, I had been alone. Julia and I were nothing to each other. I was simply being raised in that house like livestock. On the pretext of homeschooling, she prevented me from going to school, and on the grounds that it was a foreign country where I knew no one, she also prevented me from going out. That method gradually warped into a bizarre form and developed into a state of confinement for me.

Of course, I will get revenge on Julia for treating me that way. I do not know what happened between Julia and my father. I did not want to know, either. My father was a laborer at a brick factory, and I grew up poor, but we managed to live a reasonably happy life.

Whether Julia took me in out of a sense of responsibility or not, it cannot be denied that she confined me to the house and raised me for about five years of my life. How will I get my revenge? I spent the last year absorbed in that thought before finally coming to this school.

The general rule at the school was to go through about a year of dormitory life, take the university entrance exams, and then leave. However, Julia went through the procedures to have me study at this country school for two years, citing the insufficient results of my homeschooling. I was in a position to be stuck living in this rural school in Bluebell for two years. So, I arrived in Bluebell already full of animosity towards the school, but the school life was far more peaceful than I had thought.

It was the first time in nearly five years that I had seen people my own age. The only people I had met while being confined in the mansion were a few servants, Julia’s family, and her secretary. I was worried deep down, but none of the students found an outsider like me to be unnatural. They accepted me naturally, as if I had been one of them from the beginning. The classes were also ordinary. Since we were not preparing for entrance exams to places like Oxford, a Grande École, or an art school, we received a standard high school education.

Studying English literature, I felt the joy of learning for the first time. I found reading books to be quite enjoyable. I also played soccer from time to time, went for walks in the forest by myself, and had fun playing with the dogs kept in the stables.

It was not that I had made friends. Simon, Hugh, and George all felt a bit too distant to be called friends. But Simon brought me breakfast every morning, I ate lunch sometimes with Hugh and sometimes with Simon, and I always had dinner with either Simon or George, so at some point, they began to feel like a not so affectionate family.

After dinner, Simon always went out for a walk, so I usually spent my time with George. It was George who told me all about the strange atmosphere of the school.

George said.

<So, in this school, there isn’t a single kid with normal parents. There are no ordinary kids either.>

I nodded my head.

George asked, taking off the glasses perched on the bridge of his nose.

I did not answer.

George gazed at me quietly with his pale blue eyes that seemed almost transparent.

<There’s no one anywhere to protect you, is there?>

I stared at George. He was asking as if to confirm. I hesitated for a moment before answering. I suddenly turned my head and looked out the window. It was getting dark beyond the window, which was fogged up because of the cold weather. Out there, beyond that window, there was nowhere for me to go except to my father’s grave. I slowly nodded my head.

At those words, George gave a faint smile.

It was two weeks later that I realized the true meaning of those words.

By mid May, the weather had become quite warm. It was not cold even without wearing a coat over the school uniform. It was the weekend, and most of the students had received permission to go out and were on an outing to the nearby city of Gorun. Simon, Hugh, and even George were no exceptions. Simon said his nanny was coming to see him and was scheduled to spend the weekend at a hotel in Gorun. Hugh had left early in the morning, so I did not even see his face. George went out, saying there was something he needed to buy.

It seemed I was the only person left in the entire dormitory. Some staff members remained at the school, but even they were cooped up inside the buildings and were nowhere to be seen. I leisurely left the dormitory around noon. I had almost no money on me, but more importantly, there was nothing for me to do in Gorun, so I chose to take a walk around the empty school. I looked at the horses in the stables, borrowed the stable keeper’s bicycle and rode it in the forest, and by the time I returned, it was around lunchtime.

I had a simple lunch in the dining hall and spent the rest of the time sitting in the courtyard looking at the school grounds. Even though I had lived in a luxurious mansion, because of the long confinement, even just looking at an open landscape was a pleasure for me. It was around five o’clock in the afternoon when I returned to the dormitory. I unlocked the locked door with my key and went in, and I saw the back of a head sitting in front of the fireplace. The hair was black, so it had to be Simon.

I spoke first.

<You’re back early, Simon. Didn’t you say you were sleeping over in Gorun for the weekend?>

The black head turned to look at me.

<That’s right. Simon is sleeping over.>

It was not Simon. It was <Jerome>. I shut my mouth and stared at him. <Jerome> had brazenly come into our empty room. He must have come around four o’clock, as usual. He was an unpleasant and suspicious fellow.

<Jerome> smiled and beckoned to me. I thought about ignoring him and going into my room, but I could not be that rude. After all, <Jerome> was friends with the three people who lived in the same suite as me. However, without hiding my discomfort, I sat down across from <Jerome>. <Jerome> was dressed in his usual riding attire, and that riding crop I hated was lying on his thigh.

<Jerome> asked.

<No. I didn’t go out.>

<Jerome> smiled faintly even at my blunt reply. He asked again.

I asked back.

<Jerome> narrowed his eyes and looked at me. But he was still smiling.

I asked with a look of clear displeasure.

<Jerome> straightened his back, which had been leaning against the sofa. It was just that action, but my mouth began to go dry with tension. <Jerome> replied softly.

His voice was soft and kind, but somehow dangerous. It was not a reasonable suspicion based on any specific evidence, but I felt danger. I shot up from the sofa. The moment I was about to say something to <Jerome>, he suddenly swung the riding crop at me with a movement as swift as lightning.

The riding crop struck my thigh. At first, I was too dazed to understand what had happened, but that moment passed very quickly. The thigh struck by the crop buckled before I could even register it. It was my eyes that reacted to the pain before my voice. Tears welled up, and blood rushed to my face and neck. As soon as I collapsed to the floor, <Jerome> continuously lashed my back with the crop. It was only then that a scream finally came out.

<Aaaargh!>

<Quiet.>

<Jerome> scolded in a stern voice, as if commanding a horse. I could not even hear what he was saying. My thigh felt like it was on fire, and this time, the skin on my back felt like it was being torn. I had never experienced such pain before. It was the first time in my life I had been in so much pain! My body trembled uncontrollably from the pain that struck like a thunderbolt. Tears streamed down, soaking the carpet and my cheeks. I could not even breathe properly, and for a long while, my body heaved in agony.

<Jerome> lifted my face from the carpet with the leather loop at the end of the riding crop. I flinched in pain and raised my head. <Jerome> was looking at me with the same kind, smiling face as before, in the same posture, sitting on the sofa. I looked up at <Jerome>, my chin trembling.

<Jerome> asked in a much softer voice.

I had no energy to answer anything, so I just stared at him blankly. Only pain filled me up to the top of my head, and it was hard to even breathe properly. The sensation of hot tears streaming down my cheeks was vivid, along with the burning pain.

<Jerome> said.

This crazy bastard. A curse rose to the back of my throat, but whether from shock or from the pain, my tongue would not move. My body was completely frozen. If I could, I would have rushed at <Jerome> and broken his nose, but I could not lift a single finger.

<Jerome> put away the riding crop. He wiped the tears from my cheek with his gloved hand and said kindly.

At those words, my tense body relaxed. I raised myself up like a puppet. My legs were trembling, but I went into the bathroom as <Jerome> had said. As soon as I entered the bathroom, I locked the door and sank to the floor. My body shivered as if I had been stripped naked and thrown out in the middle of winter. But it was not because of the pain. This was fear. I was trembling because of terror.

With a trembling hand, I barely managed to lower my pants to my knees, and I saw the bright red mark on my thigh where he had lashed me with the crop. It would definitely bruise. I pulled my pants back up and this time took off the knit sweater I was wearing. There was a clear red mark on my back as well.

I soon composed myself. After straightening my clothes, I washed my face with cold water and stared intently at the mirror. So, that fellow <Jerome> had been biding his time, looking for an opportunity. He had quietly endured my disregard and disgust for him and waited until the weekend when everyone was gone to take his revenge. But if <Jerome> thought he had beaten me by lashing me a couple of times with that ridiculous riding crop, he was mistaken.

I wiped my face clean with a towel and rolled up the sleeves of my knit sweater to my elbows. As I squatted down below the sink, my back and thigh pulled, and the places I had been hit began to throb hotly. Ignoring the pain, I began to remove the pipe under the sink. Having grown up in a single parent household, I had been in charge of most of the chores since I was young, so detaching a sink pipe like this with my bare hands was no problem at all. After detaching the sturdy metal pipe, I gripped it tightly and opened the bathroom door.

<Jerome> was still sitting in front of the fireplace, which was no longer lit. He had the riding crop on his thigh and was gazing quietly at the window with his fingertips together. I strode towards him.

Without even turning around, <Jerome> asked.

There was no need to answer. I brought the pipe down on <Jerome>’s shoulder with all my might. If I could, I was going to break his shoulder blade. But by a hair’s breadth, <Jerome> threw himself to the floor and dodged the pipe. How? I stared at <Jerome> in surprise. And then I realized that my own reflection was clearly visible in the window in front of him.

<Jerome>, having barely avoided the blow, had not yet gotten up from the floor. I quickly jumped over the sofa and swung the pipe once more. <Jerome> dodged the pipe by scooting his hips back and then picked up the riding crop that had fallen on the floor and swung it. I too jumped back to avoid the crop. In that opening, <Jerome> got to his feet.

Unexpectedly, <Jerome> burst out laughing loudly.

<Ha, hahaha! Hahahat!>

I gripped the pipe tightly and glared at him.

<Jerome> looked at me with a beaming smile. He said in a cheerful tone.

I swore.

<Jerome> raised his hands. He showed me both his palms and slowly walked out of the room.

I called out to him as he was opening the door.

<Jerome> smiled brightly and took the key out of his pocket. He dropped the key on the floor for me to see and left the room. As soon as he was gone, the strength drained from my body and I collapsed onto the floor. It was just as George had said. In this school, no matter how normal someone seemed, there was no one who was actually normal.

I did not even eat dinner that day. I stayed holed up in my room the whole time. It was not until around noon on Sunday that I finally felt like leaving the room.

<Jerome> was nowhere to be seen. The first one to return to the dormitory was, surprisingly, Simon. Simon came back to the room when I was sitting on my bed after lunch. I was sitting there blankly, unable to lie on my stomach or my back because of the whip marks on my back and thighs.

Simon, who entered the room in a neat suit, greeted me.

<Hello.>

<Hello. Did you have a good trip?>

<Yes. It was smooth. How about you?>

Simon asked as he took off his jacket and hung it on a hanger.

For a moment, I debated whether I should tell him about <Jerome>, but in the end, I decided not to. It was because I still did not know the relationship between <Jerome> and Simon.

Ding.

I heard the clock in the living room chime. I looked at my watch. It was four in the afternoon. Sure enough, a moment later, there was a knock from outside. Simon took off his cufflinks and left the room, followed by the sound of the door opening.

Simon said.

<Jerome> replied.

Simon replied to <Jerome> as he returned to our room.

<Jerome> did not follow him into the room. I listened carefully to the sound of his boots on the carpet. It seemed he had sat on the sofa by the fireplace again. I had unknowingly been tensing my body, and only then did the tension finally release.

As I let out a sigh, Simon, who was putting his cufflinks in a box, looked back at me. I avoided his gaze and lay down on my side on the bed. Instead of asking anything, Simon silently changed his clothes. Since Simon is here today, nothing more will happen. Of course, I could not completely let my guard down. What was the relationship between Simon and <Jerome>? No, what was the relationship between the three people living in our room and <Jerome>? Are they simply friends, and is everyone just being deceived by <Jerome>? What kind of person is <Jerome> anyway?

Engulfed in doubts to which I could not find an answer, I quietly exhaled. The rustling sound stopped, indicating that Simon had finished changing his clothes. A moment later, I heard the sound of a computer turning on. When I opened my eyes, Simon was sitting in his chair in a proper posture, looking at me.

Simon asked.

<I’m going to watch Jurassic Park today.>

His blunt but utterly placid words put me more at ease.

<Okay. I’ll watch it too.>

I brought a chair, and we sat side by side and started watching the movie. <Jerome> was outside, but I could not hear any sound of what he was doing. However, when six o’clock came, he returned to his room as usual. I watched the movie with Simon and had dinner at the dining hall. Hugh did not return until close to midnight that day, and George did not come back until Monday evening, so the room was finally full of people. I felt a little more relieved.

After that incident, I started to keep a close eye on <Jerome>, but I could not discover anything particularly special. It seemed that no one, except for me, had noticed that <Jerome> was a madman. But I was able to find out one suspicious thing. Everyone pretended to treat <Jerome> normally, but at the same time, everyone kept a step’s distance from him.

Thinking back, it was true. Hugh was an exception since he treated <Jerome> the same way he treated everyone, but even the talkative George would only agree with what <Jerome> said when he was around, and Simon, who was not a talkative person to begin with, would quietly listen to <Jerome>’s chatter. Even the teachers seemed somehow uncomfortable around <Jerome>.

That secret was revealed by George not long after.

<You didn’t know yet? <Jerome> is a member of the British royal family. Someone said he’s even in the line of succession to the throne.>

Honestly, I was surprised. After living with a father who worked as a brick factory laborer his whole life, then suddenly being confined in the house of a movie star mother, and now I was attending the same school as a royal? It was bound to be surprising. There was a real reason why <Jerome> was using a room by himself. They said the dormitory was once a place where royalty or nobles stayed, but to think that real royalty was still living there now. Naturally, curiosity followed. What on earth brought a royal to this remote school? Was he also in the same boat as me, an illegitimate child? George did not know that much. I did not press further about his origins either.

Instead, I asked something else.

<George. Are you close with <Jerome>?>

George shrugged his shoulders.

<Well. Yes and no.>

I asked stubbornly.

George, who never hid anything, answered readily.

<It depends not on me, but on <Jerome>’s attitude. When he acts friendly, then we are friends, and when he passes by pretending not to know me, then we are not friends.>

I looked intently at George’s face. He did not seem to be lying. I quietly nodded my head in agreement with George’s words.

This time, George asked me.

Ding.

It was four o’clock in the afternoon. I turned my head and looked at the door. We had left the door, which Hugh had left open, unattended until now, and thanks to that, I could see <Jerome> walking towards our room. Without hiding my hostility, I glared at <Jerome> and answered.

<Because <Jerome> is curious about me.>

Before <Jerome> entered the room, I got up first and went into my own room. Through the closing door, I heard <Jerome>’s voice greeting George.

<Jerome> rode horses every single day. If it rained, he would ride even while wearing a raincoat. I often watched him ride from the library window. To be honest, I did not know a thing about horses or riding, but <Jerome>’s skill in handling a horse seemed quite excellent. In reality, he hardly ever used the riding crop when riding. However, that riding crop, which he carried around as if it were a matter of course, got on my nerves a lot.

<Jerome> was the most mentally deranged person among the few people I had ever met. Until now, I had thought my mother, Julia, was the most abnormal person, but at least she did not brandish a riding crop. The reason <Jerome> lashed me with the riding crop back then was also absurd. <Don’t get up from your seat before I allow you to>? Thinking about it now, I wonder if he was so arrogant because he was royalty. In any case, he was completely out of his mind.

The fortunate thing was that <Jerome> had not touched me since that incident. We had run into each other in the school corridors a few times but had not exchanged a single word. On my part, I despised and loathed him, but <Jerome> still showed that inscrutable, sinister, and unpleasant smile.

Sometimes, the memory of him brandishing the riding crop and acting intimidating would pop into my head, but I no longer felt fear. On the contrary, I only felt regret that I should have smashed his shoulder blade with the steel pipe and crippled him back then. If another such opportunity came, I would definitely not miss it this time.

That opportunity came sooner than I thought. It was on the Friday of that very week.

By the third week of May, the weather had undergone a dramatic change. As it rapidly turned into early summer weather, the students took off their school uniform jackets and walked around in shirts and ties. It was still chilly in the mornings and evenings, but the afternoon weather was so good that it did not matter. I too attended classes with my shirt sleeves rolled up to my elbows and my necktie knot loosely undone.

As the weather grew warmer, the students, who had been passive about outdoor sports, began to show enthusiasm for them. After eating lunch with the friends I took history class with, someone suggested we play a game of soccer during the remaining time. Everyone agreed. We allotted 15 minutes for each half, even decided on a fellow to act as referee, and quickly formed teams.

What I had not expected was <Jerome>. <Jerome> had watched with interest as we went around looking for a referee, and in the end, he joined in at the last minute. I was on the red team, and <Jerome> was on the blue team. Up to this point, I only felt extremely displeased; I did not think an opportunity to get revenge on <Jerome> would arise.

When the fellow acting as referee blew his whistle, the ball bounced up on the lawn. We all untied our neckties, unbuttoned three or four shirt buttons, and ran around chasing the ball. The grass was a bit slippery because we were wearing dress shoes.

I played right midfielder and ran around diligently. I rarely had a chance to take a shot, but since most of the attacks came from the right side, I had many opportunities to kick the ball. <Jerome> was a center back, so we did not encounter each other. It was only when it was time for a corner kick that we had a chance to get close.

<Jerome> spoke to me from behind.

I replied coldly.

<Don’t talk to me, you crazy bastard.>

The ball flew over our heads. No one scored a goal. <Jerome> winked at me as if to say it was a shame. I ignored him.

Instead, a good opportunity to return that wink came soon after. I had the ball, and it was a suitable moment for a long distance shot. In front of the goal, there was only the goalkeeper and <Jerome>. For a brief moment, <Jerome>’s and my eyes met.

I gave him the most vicious smile I could muster. Then, pretending to take a long distance shot, I kicked the ball with all my might straight at <Jerome>’s head. <Jerome>, who did not see it coming, was hit by the ball and fell flat on his back. Everyone was startled and rushed towards <Jerome>. Inwardly, I wanted to cheer as if I had scored a goal, but I held it in and approached <Jerome>, feigning surprise.

Blood was flowing from one of <Jerome>’s nostrils. It was quite a sight. I felt so good it was as if the dark bruises on my thigh and back had healed in an instant. But I did not act foolishly. Instead of being happy, I offered my hand to <Jerome> with the utmost concern.

But my expectations were completely off… <Jerome> was smiling again. He was smiling brightly even as blood dripped from one of his nostrils.

I thought <Jerome> was not a stupid fellow, so he would not get angry. However, I at least expected his expression to harden. Far from hardening, <Jerome> smiled faintly, took my outstretched hand, and got up. Contrary to his words that he was fine, <Jerome> staggered as he stood up. I reflexively reached out and supported <Jerome> without thinking. <Jerome> was grateful for my action.

<Jerome> smiled brightly and thanked me before I even answered. I had no choice but to support him and leave the field. <Jerome> nonchalantly put his arm around my shoulder, leaned on me, and slowly walked along.

It was when we were far enough away from the other students. <Jerome> whispered softly in my ear.

Those were the words I had said last weekend. That I would <smash his head>.

Instead of answering, I silently moved my feet and entered the cool old monastery building.

It seemed everyone had gone out to the school grounds, as the corridor was deserted. We walked in silence towards the infirmary. The infirmary was located near the main building’s entrance hall. The school nurse seemed to be away, as the infirmary was empty. I had <Jerome> sit on a nearby bed and turned to leave.

That was a mistake.

The moment I turned, <Jerome> mercilessly pulled down the curtain rod next to the bed and mercilessly struck my shoulder with it. It did not hurt as much as when I was hit with the crop, but the impact was stronger. My knees buckled and I fell to the floor. More than the pain, I had to get up. But before I could get up, <Jerome> kicked me. He kicked me precisely in the solar plexus with the tip of his shoe.

My breath caught in my throat. What I had for lunch rose to the back of my throat, but I just barely managed not to throw up. A fit of coughing came all at once, and I felt like I was going to suffocate. Gasping for breath, I clutched my stomach and instinctively curled my body into a ball. The sound of <Jerome> throwing the curtain rod on the floor echoed loudly. As I was rubbing my forehead on the cold stone floor, barely catching my breath, the black dress shoes that had been in front of my eyes disappeared.

Through my ringing ears, I heard the sound of him opening and closing a drawer. Damn it, he is trying to do something else. Even though I felt like I was going to vomit at any moment, I started to crawl towards the door and pull myself up. If I open the door, if I open the door and scream, someone will hear. This place is close to the main building’s entrance hall and—

An authoritarian voice came from behind me, and at the same time, I was kicked in the side as I was halfway up. Fuck! It felt like all my internal organs were bursting. He kicked me so mercilessly it felt like a knife was being stabbed into my side. Unable to even scream, I rolled on the floor, and <Jerome> strode over. He swiftly sat astride my waist. My vision was blurry from the tears that had welled up physiologically.

<Jerome> gathered my trembling wrists. A soft touch, like cloth, touched my wrists. I tried to resist, but the pain had drained the strength from my body, and I could not. I blinked to let the teardrops fall, and only then could I see my wrists tightly bound with an elastic bandage.

<Jerome> asked in a softened tone again.

My shoulder, stomach, and side where I had been hit were still killing me, but I did not care and spat in <Jerome>’s face with all my might. This time, I did not make a foolish prediction. It was obvious he would laugh again. Instead of being intimidated by being hit, if I charged at him to the end, cursing and swinging my fists, <Jerome> actually liked it more.

Look.

Is it not the same now?

We glared at each other. No. I was the only one glaring. <Jerome>’s face was even holding a smile. He did not hide his amusement as he meticulously observed my face, which was contorted with pain, anger, and contempt.

I had not underestimated <Jerome> until now. <Jerome> was the most messed up person I had ever met, and I had never forgotten that fact. It was just that <Jerome> was stronger than I had thought. He had strong arms and a good grip, and above all, he was clever. He did not fall for provocations easily and remained calm even in exceptional situations. <Jerome> did not even seem to think about wiping off my saliva that was running down the bridge of his nose and his cheek.

This time, too, unexpectedly, <Jerome> readily got up. He took a step or two back from me and said.

It was a tired old line. I replied coldly as I struggled to untie the tightly bound bandage.

<So? You want to receive my love or something?>

<That’s right.>

<Jerome>, who answered with a refreshing clarity, added.

I replied, grinding my teeth, but <Jerome> was not one to be discouraged by that.

<Oh, that’s not true. I don’t think so, Raymond. Really. We will get what we want.>

<We? You must be seriously mistaken.>

<Jerome> did not answer anymore. He looked at me affectionately and then washed his face at the sink in the corner of the infirmary. After cleanly wiping away the bloodstain from his nose and my saliva, he gave a light nod of farewell and left the infirmary. After he left, it took me over ten minutes of struggling to finally untie the knot on my wrist. He had tied it so tightly that a bright red mark was left on my skin.

As I rubbed my numb hand, I was the one who staggered out of the infirmary. Unlike last weekend, this time <Jerome> and I had exchanged blows. But the next time would not be so easy. Because I too had come to know clearly how strong, experienced, vile, and cunning a fellow <Jerome> was. <Jerome> would have to be careful of me from now on.

Separate from that, the injuries were severe. On Saturday morning, as soon as Simon left for his jog, I stripped off all my clothes and looked at my body in the full length mirror. Due to the long confinement, my pale body was blotched with bruises here and there. There was a dark blue bruise near the shoulder where I was hit with the curtain rod, and bruises were also left on my solar plexus and side without fail. The places hit by the crop had turned into purplish bruises with yellowish edges, which looked disgusting.

As I was glaring at the pathetic sight in the mirror, the door was unexpectedly thrown open. It was Simon.

Simon, who always had a calm face, raised his eyebrows as if surprised to see the wounds on my body. It was awkward. Since I was only wearing underwear, I quickly put on the gown I had left on the bed. Simon waited silently until I had tied the belt of the gown. When I finally turned and met his eyes, Simon said in his usual blunt tone.

I folded my arms and looked at Simon. I had shared a room with Simon for nearly two months now. I knew he was a trustworthy person, but I was still reluctant to confide in him about <Jerome>.

Simon stood blocking the doorway with his back straight.

I made a decision. I said firmly to Simon.

We were silent for a moment. I glared at Simon, extremely tense. It was not at all easy to read his expression. When he suddenly took a step, I stepped back without realizing it.

But Simon had only taken out the first aid kit from the drawer. Simon, who placed the first aid kit on the desk, looked at me gently.

<I’m sorry if I was meddling. But I hope you’ll let me help treat your wounds.>

I could not refuse that kindness. No… actually, I liked that much kindness. I gave up my stubbornness and took off the gown. Following Simon’s gesture, I lay face down on the bed. Soon, a very warm and gentle touch reached me.

He carefully stroked my back where I had been struck by the whip. I heard a rustling sound, and then a patch was applied over the bruise. Simon carefully applied patches to my shoulder, side, and, after I turned over, my stomach and thigh. His touch was as affectionate as a brother’s, but his eyes were as blunt as usual.

After all the patches were applied, I grabbed Simon’s arm and sat up. Simon did not speak while I put on the gown. He left the room without a word, and when he returned, he was carrying a tray with my share and his share of breakfast. Simon and I ate without a single word of conversation, but the air between us was definitely different from usual. Through the secret, we had become much closer.

Over the weekend, none of the boys in our room went out. Instead, we sat around in the living room, did our homework together, and ate meals. However, when four o’clock came, <Jerome> showed up without fail. <Jerome> and I exchanged glances, but we did not greet each other. He played chess with Hugh and had a conversation with George about computer programs that I could not understand.

During that time, I watched a TV drama and played darts with Simon in the living room. I could not say I was very good myself, but Simon’s dart skills were truly terrible. He lost five games in a row and then quit. Until he left at six o’clock, <Jerome> did not say a word to me, let alone even glance at me.

In the meantime, since the weather continued to be sunny, we did not stay cooped up in the dormitory. George, of course, was always sitting on the sofa, but Hugh, Simon, and I went for walks. Simon guided us to the forest where he usually went for his jogs.

Author's Thoughts

There are numerous stimulating scenes involving rape, gang rape, violence, abuse, and drugs. Please practice discretion as you proceed.

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