Irresponsibility Chapter 1.11

Thump. Joo Yeoun, who had landed on his bottom, opened his eyes wide.

“That was a close call.”

It was the doctor. With a slight frown, he let out a sigh of relief and got up.

Yeoun blankly followed him with his eyes as he closed the window screen, and even closed and locked the window.

“You will get hurt if you fall from here. You just got the cast off your arm; what will you do if you get another fracture somewhere else?”

Lee Hyungyu suppressed his frustration and spoke as if reasoning with him. However, Joo Yeoun only stared at him blankly. He looked as if he was completely out of his mind.

It was a few minutes after that when Joo Yeoun showed a different reaction.

When Baek Geonhyuk, who had run into the house, saw the two people sitting on the living room floor and slowed his steps as he approached. When he looked down at Joo Yeoun and let out a quiet sigh.

“…Heub!”

Joo Yeoun, who had been dazed, scrambled back in terror, bracing himself with his hands behind him. At his frightened face, Lee Hyungyu soothed him in a soft tone.

“Mr. Joo Yeoun. We are not trying to harm you. It is a situation where you could sufficiently misunderstand, but if you try to leave by force…”

“He was not trying to leave.”

A low voice cut off Lee Hyungyu’s words.

“He was trying to die.”

“……”

Joo Yeoun’s eyes grew as wide as saucers. Joo Yeoun, who was horrified as if he had heard something he should not have, soon shook his head.

“N-no, that is not, it is not true….”

His moistened pupils shook, unable to find their focus. That is not it, I was just. Just, trying to stop…. To Joo Yeoun, who was muttering fragmented words, a toneless voice pointed it out once again.

“You were trying to die.”

“Heub…!”

Those words seemed to pierce through his entire body. Yeoun gasped for breath and rolled his eyes. His gaze landed on the window.

It was definitely something he had decided to do. But hearing it in precise words, from someone else’s mouth, was extremely shocking.

I was trying to die. Me.

A frightened breath escaped from Joo Yeoun’s trembling lips. Baek Geonhyuk stared coldly at the pale face, then shifted his gaze to Lee Hyungyu.

“Good work. You can go.”

“I will also be here for a bit… Yes, I understand.”

Lee Hyungyu, who had hesitated for a moment, answered reluctantly. In front of Baek Ge-onhyuk at times like that, even he would feel a chill run down his spine. So how would it be for Joo Yeoun? It weighed on his mind to leave him.

Lee Hyungyu slowly got up and looked at Joo Yeoun. He tried to reassure him with a glance, but it did not work. Joo Yeoun, with his shoulders hunched, was only looking at Baek Geonhyuk, so there was no chance to make eye contact.

Lee Hyungyu had no choice but to turn and walk away.

Click. The door connecting to the apartment next door closed with a small sound. It was not a loud noise, but Joo Yeoun flinched, and Baek Geonhyuk ran a hand through his sweat-soaked hair and glanced in that direction.

When his gaze returned to him, Yeoun dropped his head as if convulsing. The man, who would normally have stepped back, instead took a step closer. Then, he knelt down in front of Yeoun.

Yeoun looked up at him, terrified. The man, sitting with his back hunched, somehow looked even bigger than when he was standing.

“Huuuh….”

Yeoun fidgeted and moved back a little. It was not very effective, perhaps because his arms had lost their strength. The man in his field of vision was still huge.

The man, who had been watching Yeoun trying to escape with a blank expression, opened his mouth.

“Yeoun.”

“……”

At the low voice, his wet eyes widened with a flinch.

It was a very strange moment. The man who filled his vision was also occupying his mind.

“Why were you trying to die?”

The voice, the gaze. Only the man was distinctly there. He could not take his eyes off him, nor could he move his fingertips.

“Answer me.”

A quiet urging fell.

“Be-because I was scared….”

After spitting out the words, Joo Yeoun let out a hiccup. His round pupils wavered like they were underwater.

Baek Geonhyuk stared at Joo Yeoun and let time pass quietly. In the silence, only the sound of frightened breaths could be heard.

“I know. It is scary.”

“……”

“You do not know what is what.”

His voice, when it flowed out again, was gentle. Yeoun flinched and clasped his hands together. It was only then that blood seemed to circulate in his cold body.

“But still, do not die.”

Slowly and clearly, he said.

Joo Yeoun’s face contorted. He really did not know. Whether the feeling he felt at the words ‘do not die’ was despair. Or desperation.

Did he not want to die? Did he want to live? Everything was confusing. He did not even understand himself, and he could not trust himself. He felt like he was going crazy.

“If you are scared and want to give up, leave it to me.”

As his vision blurred with tears, only the low voice became clear.

“I will save you.”

Joo Yeoun burst into tears.

I don’t know. He had been continuously thinking only about their intentions, but now, he did not know himself. He had reached a point where he was scared of everything, and he became scared of even himself.

He was small, wavering, and anxious, while the man was huge, flawless, and calm.

In the end, Joo Yeoun, in front of the most frightening person, cried his heart out as if spilling everything inside him.

The man did not say anything. He just sat in front of Yeoun and waited silently. Only when his crying had subsided did he tilt his head and ask, “Are you done crying?”

“Huuuh…. Yes….”

At the small answer tinged with tears, Baek Geonhyuk smiled. When Joo Yeoun looked at him cautiously, he said with a hint of playfulness.

“I guess we should not do physical therapy today.”

Even at the out-of-place words, Joo Yeoun nodded his head.

“It hurts.”

When he added the words as if explaining, he nodded his head again this time. Baek Geonhyuk, who chuckled at the mechanical response, stretched out his legs and tilted his neck back.

“I am worried you will think I am not keeping my promise.”

His tilted gaze landed on Joo Yeoun’s hand. Joo Yeoun reflexively folded his fingers.

“……”

There was a voice that came to his waterlogged mind.

‘I will not do that. I will not hurt you.’

“Al….”

“Hmm?”

As Joo Yeoun’s lips moved, Baek Geonhyuk came closer. Although he flinched his shoulders in surprise at the action of him leaning in his ear, Joo Yeoun summoned his courage. It seemed easier than the courage to die.

“Always….”

Baek Geonhyuk listened carefully to the words that trailed off. And in a quiet voice, he promised.

“Yes, always.”