Irresponsibility Chapter 3.2

“Ah, my blanket?”

He smiled and shook his head. His voice, when he said, “It’s fine,” was also tinged with laughter.

A moment of silence flowed. Yeoun, sitting still, sniffled a little as if his nose was running. At that, Baek Geonhyuk’s gaze keenly scanned his face.

“Did you want to do my laundry so badly you’d cry over it?”

“…No, I’m n, not crying. My nose is just running.”

Even at those words, Baek Geonhyuk stared fixedly at the corners of Joo Yeoun’s eyes. Only after confirming they were not wet did he open his mouth again.

“You’re not crying through your nose?”

“……”

Seeing the face where a faint annoyance had appeared, the corners of Baek Geonhyuk’s eyes curved slightly.

Joo Yeoun slowly rose to his feet. When he picked up his rice bowl and utensils, a large hand waved in the air.

“Leave it. I’ll clean up.”

Yeoun thought it was right for him to do the dishes, but it was awkward to have that kind of back and forth with the man. So, he answered with a small, “Yes.”

However, as he was about to return to his room, he stopped in his tracks.

“Th, thank you for the meal….”

At the small voice, Baek Geonhyuk turned his head. Joo Yeoun didn’t look at him and quickly turned to head for his room. He was taking short, quick steps, just like he had seen on the CCTV screen during the day.

Baek Geonhyuk watched the spot where Joo Yeoun had disappeared and fiddled with the back of his neck. The air felt a bit warm.

*

He had come down with body aches just from doing the laundry and cleaning the floor.

He had felt shivery and cold at dawn, and when he opened his eyes in the morning, he couldn’t get up. Lying in bed in a formal posture, Yeoun let out a sigh.

Knock knock.

“Yeoun-ah. Eat breakfast.”

Baek Geonhyuk, who opened the door, looked quizzically at Yeoun, who was still lying in bed.

“I don’t want to eat….”

The weak answer sounded similar to a very sleepy voice. He must be tired. Muttering, Baek Geonhyuk said.

“Alright, then I’ll set the table, so just get the rice and eat later.”

“Yes….”

Click. Hearing the sound of the door closing, Joo Yeoun closed his eyes. His whole body ached as if he had been beaten, and he couldn’t move a muscle.

In the short dreams he had while gritting his teeth, only scary things appeared in abundance. After narrowly opening his eyes and convincing himself that it was all a dream, he would doze off again. And he would dream again.

What broke that painful repetition was the man’s voice.

“Yeoun-ah, let’s eat.”

He was having a nightmare where the same voice was appearing.

“……”

Joo Yeoun opened his eyes. He blinked his heavy eyelids a few times and pulled the blanket up a little more. Feeling a chill, he lay still with the blanket pulled up to his chin. He wanted to put his face completely inside the blanket, but it was scary to have his face completely covered.

Baek Geonhyuk, who had been calling him from outside, said, “I’m coming in,” and opened the door. Seeing that he was still lying down, he asked, as if puzzled.

“You’re still sleeping?”

“……”

He couldn’t answer because his jaw was chattering from the cold.

“Yeoun-ah.”

Baek Geonhyuk approached the bedside. Up close, his small face was flushed. His breathing was shallow and even the way he blinked his eyes was weak.

“Are you sick?”

Even while sick, Joo Yeoun felt a little embarrassed. That he had gotten body aches from just moving around a little. So he uttered his words as calmly as possible.

“I think I ha, have body aches.”

“You should have told me if you were sick.”

The tone that came back was chilly. Joo Yeoun looked up at Baek Geonhyuk, his eyelashes trembling faintly. When their eyes met, he covered his own eyes and wiped his face.

“I’m your guardian, you know.”

A softened voice flowed out.

Was he angry? No, that wasn’t the face from that time. Joo Yeoun glanced at Baek Geonhyuk’s face and then his lips moved.

“If I j, just lie down, it gets better….”

Joo Yeoun, who was spitting out an excuse, shut his mouth when Baek Geonhyuk tilted his head askew. A small sound, hup, was made.

“…I’m going to feel your forehead.”

Baek Geonhyuk said in a low voice.

Joo Yeoun saw the large hand slowly approaching and squeezed his eyes shut. He didn’t know what he had been expecting, but the touch that covered his forehead was surprisingly gentle. Unlike the rough texture, the movement of feeling it carefully was like that.

“You have a high fever.”

“……”

“Lee Hyun… no. I’ll ask the doctor if he has any medicine. What are your symptoms?”

“It’s just bo, body aches….”

“What’s it like when you have body aches?”

Baek Geonhyuk asked as he removed his hand from his forehead. Joo Yeoun slowly opened the eyes he had squeezed shut. He saw a face looking intently at him. Perhaps because he was sick, that face didn’t seem scary.

“I’m co, cold and….”

Yes, cold and. A low voice followed the slow, weak words.

“My body a, a, aches.”

“Is that so?”

Joo Yeoun thought blankly. Has he never had body aches before. But when his gaze fell on the short sleeves, he thought that might be possible.

“I’ll go make a phone call.”

Baek Geonhyuk glanced at the blanket Joo Yeoun had pulled up to his chin and then came out of the room. He then immediately made a call.

“I think Yeoun has body aches. Seems like he’s been sick since dawn… yeah. He has a high fever.”

Baek Geonhyuk, who was continuing the call, glanced behind him.

“No, it’s fine. Go to work. I’ll find some medicine and give it to him.”

After hanging up, he clicked his tongue lowly. It just so happened that Lee Hyungyu was right about to go into surgery.

Of course, the surgery took precedence. Joo Yeoun only had body aches.

“……”

Baek Geonhyuk, who had come back with medicine from Lee Hyungyu’s house, stood by the bedside and looked on quietly. Watching him close his eyes and groan, a slightly strange thought occurred to him.

That perhaps having body aches was as serious as a surgery, and that maybe he should call Lee Hyungyu again.

“…Yeoun-ah. Take your medicine.”

Joo Yeoun sluggishly sat up. Blinking his eyes weakly, he didn’t see the large hand that was fumbling in the air.

Baek Geonhyuk, who had withdrawn the hand that was about to support his back, handed him a glass of water and the medicine. After staring intently at the Adam’s apple that moved as he swallowed the medicine, he picked up the thermometer. It was what Lee Hyungyu had told him to grab as well.

“I’m going to take your temperature.”

Joo Yeoun glanced at the large hand. Following the low voice that repeated, “Thermometer,” something hard and cold dug into his ear. Goosebumps rose, so he put his arm inside the blanket.

“Your fever is high.”

At the sensation of it brushing lightly against the outer part of his ear as it was pulled out, Joo Yeoun put his other arm inside the blanket too and fumbled to pull the blanket up.

“Look.”

Baek Geonhyuk showed the thermometer directly to the face looking up at him. Joo Yeoun tilted his body unsteadily and looked at the numbers on the thermometer.

Baek Geonhyuk looked down absentmindedly at the round crown of his head and the slightly flushed nape of his neck. His fever was so high that he could feel the warmth from his body as he came closer.

After checking the number, Joo Yeoun nodded his head. Then he glanced at his pillow, as if he wanted to lie down.

“Lie down.”

Normally, he wouldn’t have lain down in front of Baek Geonhyuk, but Joo Yeoun lay down and rested his head on the pillow as if he had been waiting. He also pulled the blanket up to his chin and then gave Baek Geonhyuk a furtive glance.

“You want me to leave?”

Baek Geonhyuk, who asked back, let out a chuckle. He looked for a moment at Joo Yeoun, who was wrapped snugly in the blanket with only his face peeking out, and then turned away.

Left alone in the room again, Yeoun forced open his drowsy eyes. It was obvious that if he fell asleep, he would have another nightmare.

As he waited for the cold to subside inside the blanket, his body gradually started to get warmer. Yeoun placed a hand on his own forehead. Had the fever gone down a little? He couldn’t tell by himself.

Slowly turning over, Joo Yeoun just blinked his eyes quietly.

He hadn’t originally been this frail, but his body seemed to have weakened after spending over a month only in bed. I should exercise a little. As he continued these various thoughts, he recalled the dumbbells he had seen in the small room, and then he recalled the thick forearms.

“……”

Joo Yeoun fiddled with his own arm under the blanket. His skin was sore, so he couldn’t touch it for long.

In any case, to get healthy again, he had to eat well and move his body. He couldn’t meet his family in his current weak state.

Though he wondered if his stutter would get better by then.

His mouth drooping gloomily, Yeoun readjusted his pillow. A tear that had trickled out made a dot on the pillow.

Being sick made him feel even more sorrowful. Come to think of it, his stomach also hurt a little. Was it because he hadn’t eaten. Yeoun, who was lying limply with his cheek on the pillow, slowly pulled back the blanket.

It wasn’t cold anymore, but his body still ached, so he went outside, slightly hunched over. He had thought that Baek Geonhyuk would, of course, have left.

These days, the doctor hardly came, and only Baek Geonhyuk would come at mealtimes. Seeing that he would come, just give him a meal, and then leave, it seemed he wasn’t monitoring him in shifts with the doctor like before.

“Oh, you’re up?”

Joo Yeoun stopped as he saw the man walking toward him. In his hand was a thermometer. He flinched and closed his eyes, and the hard thing that had dug into his ear soon moved away.

After checking the thermometer, Baek Geonhyuk said, “Yeah, your fever’s gone down a bit,” and showed it to him. Joo Yeoun also looked at it and nodded his head.

Then he suddenly realized that he and Baek Geonhyuk were standing very close to each other. Startled, Joo Yeoun stepped back.

“Let’s eat since you’re up.”

Baek Geonhyuk started walking to the kitchen, and Joo Yeoun stood in that spot for a moment, then, after putting some distance between them, followed behind him.

“Sit down.”

Joo Yeoun obediently sat down on a dining chair.