Irresponsibility Chapter 6.2

By now, he probably would have been a little angry. It’s truly scary when Baek Geonhyuk gets angry, but I have to endure it. He had every right to be angry with me.

“Then what about a movie?”

“I’m not watching one.”

“Even if we’re not watching it together, but separately?”

“…I said I’m not w-watching.”

“This isn’t easy.”

Baek Geonhyuk shook his head from side to side. He had a faint hint of a smile.

“Alright.”

he said after a moment. His attitude was cool, as if he hadn’t been hurt at all.

Watching his hands as he cleared the table, Joo Yeoun also quietly rose from his seat. He was about to return silently to his room.

“Yeoun.”

His feet stopped at the low voice. He stood still without turning his head, and Baek Geonhyuk came and stood in front of him.

Bending slightly at the waist, he reached out his hand. The hand that cut through the air and approached slowly, carefully lifted Yeoun’s bangs.

“It won’t bruise.”

The voice that pierced his ear made Joo Yeoun snap back to his senses belatedly. Acting on reflex, his hand pushed Baek Geonhyuk’s hand away harder than he intended. There was a dull sound, as if it had hit something hard.

He had meant to push the hand away, not strike it down. Joo Yeoun’s eyes widened, and he clasped his hands together near his chest. Baek Geonhyuk just smiled lightly at that.

“Were you surprised?”

he asked softly, glancing at Yeoun’s hair. His hand, which had stopped in mid-air, moved slightly in that direction before slowly lowering.

Joo Yeoun’s gaze fell on the large hand hanging down by his side. A pain bloomed in his chest, where the fracture had long since fully healed.

Baek Geonhyuk did not go to work today.

Joo Yeoun, who had been listening to the sounds from outside his room, let out a sigh. It was uncomfortable. Lately, he had been saying no to everything Baek Geonhyuk said.

Today was the same. In the morning, he had refused the suggestion to watch a movie, and when asked, Want some coffee? he had shaken his head.

“Yeoun, come out for a second.”

Suddenly, a voice came from outside.

After hesitating, he opened the door and saw Baek Geonhyuk standing in the hallway. He gestured for him to come closer, but Joo Yeoun just held onto the door and peeked his head out.

“Why…?”

“It’s been a while since you’ve used a heat pack.”

Baek Geonhyuk said casually and headed to the living room. Hearing the sound of him sitting on the sofa, Joo Yeoun hesitantly took a step.

“I’ve b-been doing it by myself.”

“You didn’t do it today.”

The reply came back without hesitation.

Unable to think of an excuse, Yeoun ended up sitting on the sofa. As he perched on the edge, Baek Geonhyuk glanced at him for a moment.

“Your hand’s been hurting lately, hasn’t it.”

How did he know? He glanced at him from the corner of his eye, and their eyes met. Baek Geonhyuk let out a short laugh and spread a towel over his own thigh.

“No… I-I’ll do it in my room.”

“Is there something in your room?”

Baek Geonhyuk replied in a low voice and took Joo Yeoun’s hand. He unfolded the curled fingers and gently pressed the inside of his palm. A ticklish sensation bloomed.

Flinch. Joo Yeoun pulled his hand away as if he’d been burned. The skin that had slipped past the rough fingertips seemed to sting. He needlessly curled his hand into a fist and threw his gaze somewhere in the kitchen.

“……”

Baek Geonhyuk looked down at his own empty hand, then stared intently at Joo Yeoun’s small, clenched fist. At his gaze, the hand hid by his side as if fleeing.

His gaze soon turned to Joo Yeoun’s face. The back of his ear, the sliver of white cheek, and the closed lips, all revealed as he had turned his head in the opposite direction.

“It doesn’t seem like you’re scared…”

Baek Geonhyuk’s words trailed off as he kept his eyes fixed on him.

“You just keep avoiding me.”

At the calm voice that followed, Joo Yeoun flinched and grabbed the sofa. His heart dropped, and his hands and feet grew cold. His mind went completely blank. He had prepared an answer for when he was asked why he was avoiding him, but it wouldn’t come to mind.

The moment he was on bad terms with him was more difficult and lonely than he had imagined. With his gaze fixed far away, Yeoun just bit his lip.

How long had the uncomfortable silence lasted? Baek Geonhyuk suddenly spoke.

“Was it… obvious?”

As soon as he cautiously turned his head, their eyes met. A low voice soon pierced his ear.

That I like you.

“……”

Joo Yeoun blinked blankly.

What did I just hear? Forgetting that he had been watching from the corner of his eye, he stared openly at Baek Geonhyuk, and a change appeared on his impassive face. His dark eyebrows shifted slightly, and his mouth opened slowly.

“…Maybe not.”

“H-huh?”

Looking at Joo Yeoun’s bewildered face, Baek Geonhyuk fiddled with the back of his neck.

“……”

“……”

Silence followed.

Without a word, Baek Geonhyuk unfolded the towel on his thigh and then folded it again with neat corners. When Joo Yeoun looked, he placed the towel on the sofa. Then he flicked away some dust with his fingertips. Tap, tap.

He seemed slow and relaxed, but it wasn’t something one would do in the middle of a conversation. And so, Joo Yeoun also gradually grasped the situation.

‘Was it obvious? That I like you.’

He hadn’t misheard, and he hadn’t said it as a joke. It didn’t seem like ‘like’ was meant in the sense of friendship, either.

Joo Yeoun moved his gaze from the large hand picking lint off the towel and stared intently at the man’s well-defined face.

“Ah…”

Baek Geonhyuk finally let out a sigh. He covered his eyes with a troubled expression, then wiped his face. Then, glancing at Joo Yeoun, he said.

“Pretend you didn’t hear it.”

“B-but I heard it.”

“……”

You’re smart. Baek Geonhyuk muttered under his breath. Seeing the slight frown on his face, Joo Yeoun darted his eyes away. Baek Geonhyuk’s large Adam’s apple bobbed down and then up. And a voice that sounded thirsty escaped.

“Don’t worry about it.”

“How can I n-not worry about it?”

“…You’re really smart.”

Baek Geonhyuk let out a small laugh. He swept his hair back and said, his gaze slanted toward Joo Yeoun.

“I meant that nothing has to change.”

At his indifferent tone, Joo Yeoun unwittingly frowned and then relaxed his expression. He belatedly realized he had been gripping the sofa tightly and loosened his hand.

“How can n-nothing change. I heard w-what I heard.”

Joo Yeoun muttered as he gathered the heat pack. He was just spitting out words as they came, not even knowing what he was saying.

He was acting nonchalant, but he was so shocked his heart felt like it had shriveled up. All he wanted was to get away from here quickly.

As he held the heat pack in his arms, Baek Geonhyuk handed him the folded towel. Joo Yeoun carefully took the towel, making sure their hands didn’t touch, and got up. He felt a gaze following him, but he turned and walked away.

It was difficult to walk with his usual stride. He couldn’t tell if he was walking fast or slow. After turning the corner and entering the hallway, Joo Yeoun bit his lip hard and walked quickly.

As soon as he entered his room and closed the door, a sigh burst out. Yeoun trudged over and sat on the bed. The heat pack and towel in his hands fell carelessly onto his thighs.

What? What is this?

Is he crazy? Does he really like me? Is that why he was so nice to me? Since when did he like me? Why? He really likes me? Me? Is he gay?

His mind was filled with questions.

Joo Yeoun glanced at the closed door, then quietly got up. But he stepped on something and jumped in place.

Realizing it was the towel, he felt drained. With a sigh, Yeoun placed the towel on the bed and stood in front of the door. As he put his ear to it, he could hear the faint sound of a TV. There were no other sounds.

Is he still sitting on the sofa?

Joo Yeoun grimaced and put a hand to his forehead. His overloaded brain felt like it was overheating. His entire face felt hot.

After pacing by the bed while pressing his cheeks with his palms, he went straight to the bathroom. He felt like his head was running too hot, so he planned to wash his face with cold water first.

Get a grip. This isn’t something to get so worked up about.

…But then again, it was something to get worked up about. The person he was living with had just said he liked him.

“What the… really.”

Joo Yeoun patted his flushed face a couple of times, then opened the medicine cabinet. Even in his confused state, his hands performed a familiar task. He took out the childish hairpin with a pink ribbon and secured his bangs.

Even though this is something to get worked up about, I still need to get a grip.

Joo Yeoun filled the sink with water and washed his face. Since the weather was hot, the water wasn’t very cold, so he splashed it on his face for a long time.

“Yeoun, let’s have lunch.”

At the voice from outside the door, Joo Yeoun’s heart dropped. He had been preparing for it, but the thought of having to face Baek Geonhyuk again made it difficult to maintain his composure.

“Hoo…”

After letting out a long breath, Yeoun resolutely opened the door. As he headed to the kitchen, Baek Geonhyuk glanced at him.

“I made toast. Milk? Coffee?”

“…Milk.”

“Should I give you some rice too?”

He missed the question because he was watching him from the corner of his eye, so he turned and met his eyes.

“Hm?”

“Ah, no.”

Yeoun shook his head and sat down at the table.