Irresponsibility Chapter 6.6

However, Baek Geonhyuk paid him no mind. He just tilted his head slightly and looked at Joo Yeoun, who kept trying to move, as if he found it annoying. When he hesitantly placed the tongs in his hand, he ruffled the back of his head as if in praise. More meat was placed on his small plate.

“This one’s a bit tough. Chew it well, Yeoun.”

“Okay…”

“Want some rice?”

Ah. You’re supposed to have soybean paste stew when you eat meat. He said, clicking his tongue.

Baek Geonhyuk often expressed regret that he wasn’t a good cook. He didn’t need to. Joo Yeoun, who had been glancing around slightly, spoke in a small voice.

“It’s d-delicious even with just the meat.”

The way Baek Geonhyuk’s eyes curved into crescents made him regret it immediately. The moments when he failed to keep his resolve because he was being mindful of him were gradually increasing.

Lee Hyeonkyu mechanically moved his jaw as he watched the scene across from him. Baek Geonhyuk was turned halfway, diligently taking care of Joo Yeoun.

“Y-you eat too.”

The words weren’t particularly affectionate, but he smiled as if honey were dripping from them. To the words, “Why are you smiling,” which were uttered no differently than picking a fight, he let out a low laugh.

It was truly a sight he felt he could never get used to. Lee Hyeonkyu tore his gaze away from them and moved his chopsticks busily. After quickly finishing his meal, he finally spoke.

“That was a good meal.”

At those words, Baek Geonhyuk gave him his attention. It was the first time during the meal. Lee Hyeonkyu drank the Coke, which somehow felt a little flat, and opened his mouth again.

“I’m definitely with you, but I feel like I’m alone.”

“I didn’t ask.”

“Yep.”

As Lee Hyeonkyu got up, Baek Geonhyuk followed suit and got meat out of the refrigerator.

“Take it.”

“All of it?”

“You eat a lot.”

Baek Geonhyuk said indifferently.

“Oh. There’s even more than before? I’ll eat it well.”

Lee Hyeonkyu smiled brightly. But when Baek Geonhyuk said, “Turns out Yeoun can’t eat much meat,” he made a sour face. The words, “I didn’t ask,” rose all the way to the tip of his tongue, but he kept his mouth shut at the weight of the Korean beef filling his hands.

“Mr. Joo Yeoun, please finish your meal.”

Seeing Joo Yeoun surreptitiously getting up, Lee Hyeonkyu was surprised and waved his hands in refusal. “No, it’s alright,” Joo Yeoun said, as if muttering, stepping out from beside the table and bowing deeply.

“G-goodbye.”

“Yes. Enjoy your meal.”

Lee Hyeonkyu smiled warmly and bowed his head in return, then said to Baek Geonhyuk, “I’ll be going now.” Baek Geonhyuk gave a casual wave to Lee Hyeonkyu as he crossed over to the house next door, then looked down at Joo Yeoun.

The back of his head, bowing once more, was round. When he placed a hand on it, the small head fit perfectly in his palm. Baek Geonhyuk’s eyes curved gently.

“So polite. Not like kids these days.”

As he stroked his hair, Joo Yeoun lifted his head and looked up at him. It was a glare, as if he’d realized he was being teased.

“What…”

At the sullenly uttered word, Baek Geonhyuk rumbled with laughter.

“Let’s eat.”

He said in a voice tinged with laughter and gently pulled Joo Yeoun’s wrist.

Joo Yeoun sat down again. The seat across from him was empty, but unlike a moment ago, his heart felt at ease. So he familiarly accepted Baek Geonhyuk pouring him Coke and placing the most deliciously cooked piece of meat on his plate.

“Tell me when you want to eat it. I’ll buy it again.”

Baek Geonhyuk said after finishing his meal. Joo Yeoun stared silently at the greasy frying pan, then wrinkled his nose.

He had money to buy Korean beef, share it with the neighbor, and buy more to eat, but their situation was apparently too difficult to buy a hand massager. He wondered what kind of situation it was.

When he was with Baek Geonhyuk, there was no room for depressing thoughts to creep in. He kept forgetting reality. The smiling face that looked at him and the gentle touch made him endlessly peaceful.

However, when he was gone, he was constantly aware of the fact that he was alone. Like the ground that was always slightly damp from the long rainy season, he too was soaked in melancholy.

‘It’s because you’re sick.’

‘Maybe it’s worse because it’s raining and my hand hurts.’

He did try. He recalled the gentle voice and tried to look at his feelings and thoughts objectively and rationally.

Depression only eats away at you. It is right to shake it off and think positive thoughts.

However, it was a clear fact that he was currently acting selfishly. Baek Geonhyuk was kind without knowing anything, and he was shamelessly just taking his kindness.

On top of that, wasn’t he just receiving the care and warmth he gave, without any intention of responding to the feelings that he liked him?

But…

It didn’t seem like Baek Geonhyuk wanted to date him either. It looked like he had no intention of it at all.

“……”

At this point, he even began to suspect that the words “I like you” might have been a sophisticated tactic. Being with Baek Geonhyuk always meant he got swept up by him and situations just flowed by, but recently, hadn’t that confession-like statement completely bewildered him?

After thinking deeply, he soon lost his train of thought.

Either way, there was nothing bad for him. If he had kept pushing to date, how much more would he have been shaken…

…No. It was something with no possibility in the first place. Those kinds of feelings would disappear with time anyway, and in the end, nothing would be left.

Joo Yeoun hugged his knees and stared quietly outside. He also kept trying to empty his mind. He looked meticulously at the soggily wet fields or stared blankly at the houses in the distance.

It seemed he would never know whether people lived there or not. He couldn’t know, since he didn’t go outside.

Feeling a tightness in his chest, Joo Yeoun took a deep breath. He stayed like that for a long while, and when he heard Baek Geonhyuk arriving, he turned around and fixed his gaze on the TV. He felt that Baek Geonhyuk would worry if he knew he had just been staring out the window.

But Baek Geonhyuk, who had come in, asked in a soft tone.

“Have you been sitting there for long?”

“N-not really…”

As he trailed off, he touched the floor with his hand. He wondered what he could possibly know from touching the floor, but he felt that if it was Baek Geonhyuk, he could probably figure out even how many hours he had been there. So he avoided his gaze by pretending to watch TV.

A fishing program was on. It was a topic he had no interest in, but he furrowed his brow as if concentrating hard.

“Yeoun.”

With a quick glance, he shifted his eyes, and Baek Geonhyuk placed a hand on the back of his head.

“Let’s move, us.”

At the low voice, Joo Yeoun’s eyes went wide and he whipped his head around. When their eyes met, he smiled faintly.

Baek Geonhyuk really gave him no room to breathe.

“Wh-where to?”

“It’s not too far.”

Joo Yeoun, who had been staring at him dazedly, suddenly wore an anxious expression.

“Is it dan… dangerous? Is there s-something dangerous?”

“No.”

Baek Geonhyuk, who answered softly, placed a hand on Yeoun’s back. He added, stroking it calmly with his wide palm.

“That’s my original house.”

“Ah…”

He had speculated before that he might be staying here temporarily because of him. It made sense. Baek Geonhyuk must have had many inconveniences, living somewhere else while leaving his own house empty.

“Is it okay to move?”

Joo Yeoun nodded. He was in a position of living off him anyway, so he had no choice but to follow him.

What will the rooms be like there? I must make sure Baek Geonhyuk uses the bed. As he was making a quiet resolution, he spoke.

“Then let’s go.”

“R-right now?”

Joo Yeoun looked up at him with wide eyes. At that, Baek Geonhyuk nodded nonchalantly. When he opened and closed his lips, flustered, he raised an eyebrow.

“Ah. Because it’s raining? It’s fine, we don’t have much luggage.”

That’s not why… Looking at the unconcerned face, Joo Yeoun frowned. At that, Baek Geonhyuk tapped his own brow and smiled lightly. The furrowed brow smoothed out.

It was too sudden. By the time he came to his senses, a single suitcase was in the living room, and he was standing blankly next to it.

“You probably won’t run into anyone, but just in case.”

Baek Geonhyuk put a cap on Joo Yeoun.

“It’s a bit big,” he muttered, and adjusted the strap in the back. He felt a ticklish touch on the back of his head.

Baek Geonhyuk tightened the cap just enough so it wouldn’t fall off easily, then bent his knees to look at Joo Yeoun’s face. His long hair, pressed down by the cap, was covering his face. He carefully moved the hair out of the way.

Joo Yeoun kept his eyes lowered, his gaze fixed only on the suitcase. The touch that lightly brushed above his eyebrows somehow made him want to squirm.

“Oh. I forgot something important.”

“Huh?”

At his question, Baek Geonhyuk went to the master bedroom and came back. The moment he saw the object in his hand, Joo Yeoun bit his lip.

“Yours.”

A pink hairpin dangled from the rough hand.

“…I-I don’t have to take it.”

“You use it every day.”

“……”

How is there nothing Baek Geonhyuk doesn’t know? He had put it in a basket in the cupboard and only used it when he washed his face. At this point, it was truly suspicious enough to wonder if he had hidden a CCTV camera somewhere.

“If I’d known you’d like it this much, I would’ve bought you one in every color.”

“I-I don’t need it.”

At the words spoken as if in regret, Joo Yeoun glared and put the hairpin in his pocket. Then, leaving the aggravating person behind him, he gripped the handle of the suitcase.

At that, Baek Geonhyuk let out a low laugh and strode over. He gently removed Joo Yeoun’s hand from the handle and pulled the suitcase toward the front door.

“D-did you tell the teacher?”

At those words, Baek Geonhyuk turned back, glanced at him for a moment, and then asked.