In This Life I Will Die as an Actress Not a Villainess Chapter 102

At Hwang Yuseon’s question, everyone stopped eating and looked at me.

A wave of bewilderment washed over me.

“…”

The question Hwang Yuseon had thrown out wasn’t so different from what PD Lee Sangman had said.

Others had no idea about my past life.

To them, the current Han Sena was an actress charging down a smooth road who always made bold moves with guts to spare.

Though some people questioned why I gave up Fabulous this time, public opinion ultimately turned favorable after I won the Snowfall Award and received the Marden invitation.

Perhaps even more than before.

-As expected, that’s Han Sena.

-She’s in a league of her own. Adding a bit of exaggeration, I think she’s an unprecedented actor in Korea’s history.

-I’m looking forward to seeing Actor Han Sena’s growth going forward.

-Let’s aim for a Hollywood debut.

Yet I’d never once forgotten the heart that had wandered in my past life.

And this new life wasn’t always filled with certainty either.

There were almost no calculated moves where I’d known the outcome in advance.

The people who didn’t know this probably thought…

That I moved as if I always knew the answer.

The gap between how others saw me and how I saw myself was quite large.

Without hiding my confusion, I smiled and opened my mouth.

“Of course I’d love it if my team member places first.”

At that, Hwang Yuseon raised her eyebrows with an “Oh?”

“But first place isn’t the goal. As a mentor, my goal is improving my team members’ skills. Kind of a boring answer, isn’t it?”

Park Seokjin sunbaenim laughed out loud after hearing my response.

“As expected, you never disappoint.”

I awkwardly laughed along with sunbaenim.

As I did, I thought once more about the image I’d create on this audition program.

Someone who always tackles things sincerely and challenges boldly.

And someone who silently does what needs to be done.

Wouldn’t showing this version of ‘me’ be enough?

On top of the unexpected side I’d shown on the variety show Uninhabited Island, I could add another layer to create a new image too.

Hwang Yuseon glanced at me and smirked.

“You’re eloquent in every interview. You really are good with words.”

I grinned back at Hwang Yuseon as she said this.

* * *

“Hey, how long has it been since we threw back drinks like this, huh?”

“Drink up, drink up!”

A drinking session with just Minyeong unnie and me.

We’d both suddenly gotten the urge and formed this impromptu gathering.

“Wow, this fish stew is amazing.”

Less than an hour after sitting down, unnie and I were on our third bottle of soju.

It had been ages since I’d drunk this comfortably.

The alcohol tasted sweet.

Right around when we’d eaten until our stomachs were about to burst, unnie brought up the audition program.

Unnie had a new iron rule about not discussing work during meals.

“How’s it going? What are the people like?”

“Not bad. Hwang Yuseon sunbaenim has some sharp edges to her, but she’s not unlikeable.”

“Really? I heard that person’s incredibly smart. Good at working things out from every angle.”

“Seems like it.”

So she was famous in the industry too.

“So have you thought about what kind of image you’ll go with?”

“Yeah, well. I think just being honest like usual is best. Rather than deciding on one thing, I’ll be spontaneous and pop out unpredictably, push through intensely sometimes, and challenge things crazily. Like that.”

Minyeong unnie nodded as she listened to me.

“Right, that’s Han Sena. Your acting style isn’t the type to focus on a single color either.”

Unnie took a sip of soju and asked again.

“By the way, won’t there be mentees who want to solidify their own distinct style?”

“Those types will probably gravitate toward Hwang Yuseon sunbaenim. I submitted my list focusing on friends who seem bold and flexible.”

“Ah, so that’s how the matching works.”

After the meeting between mentors and participants, both mentors and participants ranked their preferred people and submitted lists.

The production team was using those lists to form the teams.

We’d find out our team members on the first day of main competition filming.

“Are there any participants who really caught your eye?”

I hesitated at unnie’s question, unable to answer easily this time.

Because Do Changhyeon had suddenly come to mind.

“There was one, but…”

When I trailed off, unnie looked at me curiously.

“But?”

“But… I need to watch him more. He’s a person of interest.”

“Person of interest?”

Unnie’s eyes went round.

I shook my head as if I didn’t want to talk about it.

Unnie smirked and asked one last time.

“How bland. So what concept are you going with for the first broadcast?”

“Hmm, I wonder. What should I wear that day?”

“Clothes are important, kid. Image is all created through fashion.”

* * *

Three days later, the first broadcast recording studio.

The main competition studio was much bigger than I’d expected.

Dozens of installed lights and cameras caught my eye.

Just how much did they spend on production?

I arrived earliest and found my seat at the judging panel.

Then I put on the small watch I’d brought.

After agonizing over what to wear, I’d ultimately chosen casual clothing.

It was a way to keep my first impression from seeming unapproachable.

I matched bright jeans with a loose-fitting shirt.

Though I put effort into my makeup and hair like I would for a filming set.

I couldn’t look sloppy to the viewers and mentees.

The other judges gradually arrived and took their seats too.

Hwang Yuseon tapped my shoulder as she passed.

“Going for a kind of simple concept today, Sena-ssi?”

Hwang Yuseon asking this had matched a navy suit with black dress shoes.

Her impression looked quite sharp, different from during the drama.

She kept showing sides different from my expectations.

I answered with a slight smile.

“I’ve heard sometimes that my impression feels cold. Do I look friendly?”

Then Ha Seongjun, who’d approached from behind, jumped in.

“More than friendly, you look pretty?”

I laughed and shot back.

“You’re good with lip service, aren’t you?”

Ten minutes later.

“Standby!”

With participants, judges, and staff all in position preparing, the assistant director’s voice echoed through the studio.

“Recording starts. 3, 2, 1.”

The studio lights snapped off, and brilliant lights poured from the screen above the stage.

As grand music played, the words Be Audition appeared on the screen.

Then the screen opened to both sides.

Through the gap, the MC host appeared.

“Hello. I’m Kim Igwang, the MC for Be Audition.”

The judging panel including me sent enthusiastic cheers.

The MC immediately launched into introducing the program.

Appropriate videos flowed across the screen matching the MC’s explanation.

“…The highest quality actor audition in history! First, let me introduce the four mentors who’ll lead this audition!”

Lights turned on above the judging panel, and cameras with red lights lit up trained on us.

“Now! Let’s start with Hwang Yuseon-ssi’s introduction.”

At the MC’s words, Hwang Yuseon stood up from her seat and grabbed the mic.

“Hello, I’m Hwang Yuseon. I decided to appear partly to reinforce my own beginner’s mind while watching talented friends.”

“Oh, that’s great. We can’t not hear your personal goal as a mentor! Please share your aspirations.”

At that, Hwang Yuseon grinned and threw out a spirited response.

“I’m definitely sending my team members to the semifinals and finals. The winner will come from my team too. That’s all.”

“Wow.”

Ha Seongjun beside me clapped loudly.

Park Eunki’s eyes went round in surprise.

I also clapped while inwardly impressed.

This industry really has plenty of fierce women.

“Now, next is Ha Seongjun-ssi!”

At the MC’s call, Ha Seongjun shot up and saluted, bringing laughter.

“I’m Ha Seongjun! I’m no pushover either!”

I found myself chuckling at that sight too.

One by one they introduced themselves, and my turn gradually approached.

I felt slight sweat forming on my palms.

This strange tension is a first…

I’m not showing that I’m nervous, am I?

After Park Eunki finished his introduction remarks, the MC finally called my name.

“Finally, Han Sena-ssi!”

As I stood up, my profile appeared on the screen.

-Drama <Flat Shoes Cinderella> Supporting Role Yoo Ji-an – NBS Rookie Award

-Drama <Flower Over Palace Walls> Lead Role Song Sunim – Hanho Excellence Award

-Short Film, Drama <Desert Island> Lead Role Lee Jihyeon

-Film <Hometown>

Thinking about it, I’ve been running nonstop but my filmography is pretty short.

With that thought, I grabbed the mic.

“Hello, I’m Han Sena.”

“Sena-ssi, please give us a word about your determination competing against the senior mentors!”

The MC grinned and threw out one last comment-worthy prompt.

Smooth, seamless hosting.

“I’ll do my best to connect with the mentees, and I believe the mentees will do the fighting. I’ll provide solid support from behind.”

I presented an answer that was fluid yet not weak.

If I came on as strong as Hwang Yuseon, given I’m the youngest in terms of career, I risked becoming fodder for devil’s editing.

“Oh, I’m feeling some inexplicable spirit here? The competition among mentors has me even more excited. Now I’ll introduce the two head judges!”

Spotlights dropped onto Park Seokjin sunbaenim and Kim Heejoo sunbaenim sitting in the center of the judging panel.

The sunbaenims received applause and each gave brief self-introductions.

They seemed embarrassed by this kind of attention, laughing awkwardly.

“Now, finally, the real stars of Be Actors! Let’s bring out our sixteen participants!”

The screen opened once more and the waiting participants walked out one by one.

Meanwhile, the MC briefly explained the selection process for mentor-mentee teams.

The participants looked at the cameras and judging panel with eyes full of anticipation and hope as they stood under the lights.

Watching each of those faces somehow made my heart pound.

“Now, from here on, mentors and mentees will enter rooms prepared in the back of the studio. In those rooms, mentors and mentees will discover their team members.”

Upon hearing this, participants and mentors all wore tense expressions.

I too sat calmly while struggling to suppress my racing heart.

What kind of team members will I meet?

The production team had kept the team composition thoroughly secret from both participants and mentors.

“Then everyone! Please move to your assigned rooms!”