Weren’t You the One Who Was Dying? Chapter 83

Looking into those eyes, I thought—

‘What is this, why is it so warm?’

What is it? It’s way warmer than I expected.

Was Ehit always this warm of a person?

‘He’s basically a hot pack.’

My body felt so relaxed, like I had stepped into a hot bath.

‘This is paradise…….’

Earlier, I thought it was cold but still bearable. But once I tasted warmth, I really didn’t want to go back out into the cold.

Ehit, who was still holding my hand, fiddled lightly with my fingertips.

“Your hands are cold.”

I tend to get cold hands and feet in autumn, so my hands weren’t warm—but Ehit was usually someone with fairly cold hands too.

Yet today, he was genuinely warm. Truly a walking heater.

Just then, a gust of wind blew again from the other side.

Dust rushed into my throat, which had relaxed and wasn’t prepared.

“Khk! Cough!”

A cough burst out before I could even cover it with my sleeve.

“…….”

I saw Ehit’s face, which had been relatively soft until a moment ago, stiffen.

Ah, did that bother him? Ehit was very sensitive about health, so maybe even more so.

“Khk, sorry, I keep coughing.”

I hurriedly pulled out a handkerchief while forcing the cough down. As I suppressed the lingering cough, heat rose to my eyes.

‘I should tell the bookstore owner there’s a lot of dust inside.’

Thinking that, I lifted my head to look at Ehit.

“……?”

But Ehit’s eyes were red. Like he had just peeled an onion.

I checked to see if dust had gotten into them, but nothing was visible.

Then why were his eyes getting redder and redder?

‘It’s like he put five onions in there.’

The skin around his eyes was flushed, and his eyes, opened slightly as if angry, were bloodshot, almost filling with tears.

There’s no such thing as a reaction without a cause. Something had to be wrong.

It might be something you can’t see with the naked eye.

Maybe even a side effect of foresight.

“Ehit, are you okay?”

Instead of answering, Ehit wrapped his hand around mine again. His red gaze was still fixed on me.

At this rate, it seemed better to hurry back to the estate and let him rest.

“Ehit, let’s go back to the estate. You should rest a bit.”

“Are you going too, Dapflen?”

“Me?”

No, I still had something to do once Ehit wasn’t around……

“I’ll stay at the bookstore a little longer and then go.”

“Then I’ll stay here too.”

“Ehit, you should go back. I’m telling you to rest.”

“Being here is rest for me.”

Well, spending time in a bookstore does feel calming and quiet. Still……

“Are you sure? You said it’s your day off.”

“Yes.”

“Doesn’t it feel like a waste of time?”

I meant that sincerely.

Ehit didn’t have that much time.

If he was here to keep an eye on me, and if that was for Cloyden, then it might be important work for him.

But it bothered me that he was spending what little time he had on something like that.

Wouldn’t it be better to spend it with someone he liked, someone who made his heart truly shine?

“It’s a waste. Every minute, every second.”

“Then why are you here? You should go somewhere and rest.”

“That’s exactly why I’m here.”

Still staring straight at me with reddened eyes, Ehit spoke as if he were forcing something down.

“Because I don’t have much time left with you, Dapflen.”

Ehit, still radiating warmth from head to toe, was looking at me with eyes full of that heat.

They looked angry, and also sad.

But wait—what did he just say?

‘What does he mean, not much time left with me?!’

No way.

‘Did he notice I’m preparing to break off the engagement?!’

Looking at his face with that thought, it almost seemed possible.

‘He looks really angry!’

Now that I noticed, his teeth were clenched tightly.

‘Who knows? We might break off the engagement……?’

‘That kind of joke isn’t amusing, Dapflen.’

He had said that not long ago, so if he noticed, it would make sense for him to be upset!

I hurriedly calmed my confused thoughts and forced a smile, pretending I’d misunderstood.

“I don’t know what you’re thinking, but no. Don’t worry, Ehit.”

Smiling, I reassured him—even if it was a lie.

If he found out later, he might get even angrier, but letting suspicion rise before I was ready felt like asking for trouble.

Still, Ehit’s expression stayed bad for a while, and the grip of his hand around mine didn’t loosen.

“Ah, Ehit, look over there! A cat!”

I remembered hearing that Ehit once took care of a cat when he went to Kennel Island, so I hurriedly distracted him by pointing at a cute kitten passing by.

His expression softened a little, thankfully, but the uneasy feeling didn’t fully go away.

 

 

****

 

 

 

On the way back to the estate.

‘Guess I failed to go earn money again today.’

After failing to shake Ehit off, I decided to just enjoy the holiday and walked slowly, taking in the natural scenery.

The crisp autumn air, fallen leaves turning red, and beyond the road filled with those things, the distant sea.

I walked on, feeling Bellachen’s scenery one piece at a time.

Thinking about it, once I broke off the engagement, it would probably be best to leave Bellachen. That meant I only had a few months left to see these views.

Ehit kept walking at the same pace as me.

Even though he could easily walk ahead with his longer strides, he didn’t. He stayed beside me.

As we climbed the hill leading to the estate, I stopped for a moment and looked down.

Bellachen’s beautiful scenery spread out before my eyes.

“Why are you standing there like that?”

“I’m trying to take it all in. Autumn is short, you know. It’s already getting cold.”

“…….”

“In just a few days, winter will come. Then this scenery will be gone.”

Wow, the air feels good.

‘Nice. This kind of air right before winter really is the best.’

Even in a fantasy romance world, the Empire didn’t seem free from strange climate changes—autumn felt especially short.

Cities this beautiful weren’t common even within the Empire, so I wanted to enjoy Bellachen’s autumn while I could.

Then, Ehit, who had been walking beside me the whole time, stepped in front of me.

Naturally, my gaze shifted from the scenery to him.

Why is he staring so hard?

I gave a small smile, then turned away a little awkwardly.

Ehit grabbed me again. This time, it wasn’t just lightly tugging at my sleeve.

He pulled me close, almost trapping me in his arms, and carefully took my hand.

“Don’t go.”

“I’m just heading into the estate. Should we stay a bit longer?”

“That doesn’t matter. Just… wherever you go…… don’t go somewhere I can’t see you.”

Why is he acting like this today?

Blinking, I smiled and joked back.

“What are you saying? You’re not my comfort doll or anything.”

“A comfort doll is fine. For the remaining time, take me with you no matter what.”

I laughed, thinking he was joking back at my joke.

But his expression was still far too serious for that.

Ehit’s face darkened more and more, like something was deeply troubling him.

Beneath his calm-looking face, I caught a glimpse of a violent whirlpool of emotion.

“Ehit, what’s wrong? Why do you look like that?”

“I’m not making any expression.”

It sounded like he was telling me not to worry about it, but seeing his face like that made my heart feel heavy.

I hesitated, then spoke.

“I don’t know how this sounds, but I worry. When you make that kind of face.”

It might be something Ehit, with his strong pride, didn’t want to hear.

But it was my honest feeling right now.

“Worry?”

“Yes. I’m worried. I care.”

“Why do you care?”

“I can’t not care…… we are engaged, at least for now.”

Even if it’s temporary.

Only after making that excuse did reality sink in.

Right. This relationship is temporary.

No matter the reason, we’re standing side by side now—but someday, we’ll go our separate ways.

Still, his large hand was holding mine. With a hot-pack-like warmth that made me want to turn away from that reality.

“Dapflen.”

Ehit tightened his grip on my hand and called my name.

After silently looking at me as if lost in thought, he asked,

“What does this engagement mean to you?”

“Do you want an honest answer?”

“Yes.”

If I were completely honest, I could be endlessly honest.

But the honesty he wanted probably wasn’t the kind I was thinking of.

“To me, it’s like a life experience.”

It was a compromise, in my own way.

But when he heard that, Ehit’s face hardened even more. It was so cold that I hurriedly added,

“No, why are you making that face because of that! I meant it in a good way. Like, being in this kind of relationship with someone like you is a good experience, that kind of thing.”

“…….”

“I said it’s a good meaning?”

“I’m making a happy expression too.”

“Right, I guess I’m just bad at reading faces. Let’s go with that, then.”

After turning his head away for a moment, Ehit spoke.

“If it’s a life experience… is there anything else you’d like to try?”