Formless Chapter 46

“I won’t be able to concentrate.”

“Yes. Ah, I like that there are many restaurants near the academy.”

“What did you eat today?”

“Pho,” Heewoon said, and added. The longer the conversation became, the softer Gangwoo’s expression grew.

“I eat lunch with Jihwan.”

“…Jihwan?”

“A schoolmate who attends with me.”

Jihwan…. Gangwoo quietly sounded out the name. Gangwoo moved his fingers slightly on the table and looked at Heewoon, asking,

“Does Sunbae call that ‘Jihwan’ the way he calls me?”

“The way I call you?”

“Like, Gangwoo-yah, and…”

He drew out the end of his sentence. Their eyes met.

“Does he call you in a way that makes you want to grant him everything?”

His voice was calm. Heewoon stared blankly at Gangwoo. Unlike Heewoon’s subtly wavering eyes, Gangwoo’s eyes did not shake at all. They simply remained still, containing Heewoon.

Only his well-formed lips moved on his expressionless face.

“It’s a big problem. I think I’m going to become a pushover like this.”

It sounded like a joke, but he did not smile at all. He poured wine into the empty glass and slightly raised the wine bottle toward Heewoon. Heewoon shook his head. He had to go home and do homework.

Gangwoo, who was swirling the wine glass, suddenly asked,

“Did you hear from your hyung?”

Heewoon’s eyes widened at the sudden mention of his hyung. When Heewoon answered, “No,” Gangwoo nodded. Looking at Heewoon’s bewildered face, he said,

“If you need to ask a favor, ask me nicely.”

In a way that makes me want to grant you everything.

Looking at Gangwoo’s slightly curved eyes, Heewoon nodded distractedly.

🧸

A few days passed. Heewoon was on his way home after having dinner with Jihwan when a call came. It was an unsaved number, but Heewoon knew who it was.

“…Hello?”

His heart pounded. 

—Hey, Woo Heewoon. How are you doing?

“I’m good. Uh, how about hyung-nim?”

—I’m doing great!

Soon after Heewoon started sending a fixed amount of money, this man pretended to be close and told him to call him hyung-nim. He repeated several times that Heewoon was like his younger brother, so he was giving him a lot of consideration, and since he had told those above him, he would continue to look after him well.

As if he were trying to brainwash him.

“I, I sent the money this month too….”

—Don’t talk about money, that’s upsetting! What kind of relationship do we have?

The boisterous laughter sent shivers down his spine. Despite this, if the debt repayment day was even slightly delayed, this man would come looking for Heewoon.

—But you quit all your part-time jobs recently, so how are you sending the money?

Slam. His heart sank.

How did this man know he had quit all his part-time jobs? In the beginning, he had people watching him, but as Heewoon regularly sent money, it seemed he wasn’t constantly monitored. Heewoon realized this when the man remarked that it must be hard working and earning money while going to school, even though it was vacation time.

But why did the surveillance suddenly start again?

—I heard you’re just spending money. Did your hyung send you money?

The artificially soft tone felt exactly like a camouflage intended to hide something.

“Ah, no. I, I received a bonus while working part-time…. I, I’m going to find a job again now.”

—Good. You need to work hard to pay off your debt quickly and be a dutiful son.

“Yes.”

This man encourages him every few months, and perhaps that was the purpose of today’s call.

—I’ll see you when your hyung comes back.

“Yes.”

As Heewoon was about to hang up, the rough voice asked,

—There’s nothing wrong, is there?

Heewoon awkwardly replied that there wasn’t.

After hanging up, Heewoon stared intently at the call history. The 11 unsaved digits were quickly memorized without effort.

‘Eat lots of good things and, well… maybe do some exercise.’

The man added that last part. That comment strangely bothered him. Even though it was ordinary encouragement, nothing special.

Heewoon suddenly looked around. Things he hadn’t noticed until a moment ago now came into view. For instance, the black car parked way back there, the slightly rough-looking man sitting in front of the convenience store, and the large figure loitering in the alley.

Some of these must surely be his imagination. Perhaps all of them were. However, Heewoon proceeded toward his house cautiously.

Could there be someone among them planted by Seo Gangwoo? The gaze he just felt might be Seo Gangwoo’s people, not the loan sharks. Thinking that way made him feel a little relieved.

“……”

He decided to believe the reason for that relief was that Seo Gangwoo, at least, would not steal money or bother his mother.

Upon entering the house, Heewoon asked his mother as naturally as possible,

“Mom. Did hyung contact you recently?”

“No. I’m worried because I haven’t heard from him at all. I wonder if something happened…”

His mother muttered worriedly.

Heewoon suddenly recalled what Gangwoo had said before.

‘But even if your hyung dies soon, don’t suspect me. It seems he’s been poking around everywhere trying to start a business, so I think he’s accumulated quite a few grudges.’

If something happens to hyung…

…What about the money?

Judging by the fact that the man asked today when hyung was coming back, he must be waiting for the money hyung would bring. Ah, well. The money won’t evaporate, so even if it takes some time, it can be recovered.

He belatedly realized how bad the thoughts he was having were, seeing his mother’s exhausted face. Heewoon’s face turned bright red.

Still, he’s his hyung.

Even though he ran off overseas with the money alone when the loan sharks came making a scene demanding repayment, he’s his hyung. Even though he called months later and got more money from Mom without Heewoon knowing, he’s his hyung. He’s family.

Heewoon tightly bit his lip. Not hating his hyung was several times harder than not hating his mother.

“Heewoon. When your hyung comes back, our Heewoon will suffer less.”

“……”

“Heehyun’s business is supposed to be doing extremely well.”

Did his business doing well lead to him acquiring grudges from people in the Philippines? If so, Heewoon hoped he would return safely to Korea. No, even if that wasn’t the case, hyung should be safe. His hyung had been so good to him when he was very young.

“He should come back soon…”

A few strands of hair fell onto his mother’s cheek as she muttered, staring blankly into the air. Her haggard face was covered entirely with worry and anxiety. To his mother, who had never traveled abroad, the Philippines was a terrifyingly unfamiliar place, and she felt endlessly sorry for her hyung living there alone.

Even though hyung abandoned them and ran away.

Heewoon clenched his fist. Thinking about it again, he felt he could afford to hate his hyung. His mother worries about his hyung more than enough.

🧸

From the next day, Heewoon began to pay attention to his surroundings constantly. Then he realized that a black van was always near him. It was definitely someone tailing him. But it was confusing whether they were the loan sharks or people assigned by Seo Gangwoo.

When Heewoon met Seo Gangwoo a few days later, Gangwoo was rough, as if venting suppressed desires. As soon as they arrived at his house, his pants were pulled off, and they had sex on the sofa without even a chance to go upstairs to the second floor.

Only after thoroughly satisfying himself with Heewoon for a long time did Gangwoo’s intensity subside. Gangwoo kindly hugged Heewoon and went upstairs, where they showered together and Gangwoo put his own bathrobe on him. Unlike when Gangwoo wore it, the robe was too big for Heewoon. Gangwoo playfully pinched his nipple, which was briefly exposed when Heewoon moved, but he did not take his body again.

“Um, Gangwoo-yah.”

“Yes.” Gangwoo softly replied, fiddling with the back of Heewoon’s hair which had grown long enough to cover his nape. Heewoon cautiously asked,

“Does the person watching me watch me all day long?”

“……”

The hand stroking his nape stopped. Gangwoo, who had been leaning back on the sofa, slowly straightened his upper body.

“Why are you curious about that?”

He scrutinized Heewoon’s face closely, as if trying to read his intention. Then he asked crookedly,

“Planning on doing something else?”

“N-no! It’s just. I keep feeling like someone is watching me lately…. I wondered if it was you.”

“What if it is?”

Gangwoo gripped Heewoon’s jaw. It hurt a little, and Heewoon frowned, saying,

“Then I don’t have to worry about it. If, if it’s not you, I’m a little scared….”

Gangwoo, who was staring at Heewoon’s face, slightly curled up the corner of his mouth. He took his hand off Heewoon’s chin and slowly stroked his cheek.

“What should I do? Sunbae must be scared.”

“…Huh?”

Heewoon’s eyes widened. Did that mean he hadn’t put surveillance on him?

“Lately, I’ve been watching Sunbae’s surroundings more than Sunbae himself.”

“Surroundings…?”

Why watch his surroundings? Surroundings… Mom? Mom is always at home. Then does it mean he’s not watching Heewoon, at least?

Seeing Heewoon’s agitation, which was obvious at a glance, Gangwoo laughed as if amused. Gangwoo deliberately furrowed his brow and said,

“Since you’re scared, I should hold you.”

Gangwoo wrapped his arms around Heewoon’s waist and hugged him so tightly it was hard to breathe, giving him little kisses on the top of his head. Heewoon’s cheek was squished against Gangwoo’s firm shoulder as he rolled his eyes in confusion.

“I thought you were watching me constantly….”

At that near-mutter, Gangwoo loosened his grip slightly and looked down at Heewoon.

“Exactly.”

Gangwoo agreed, cupping Heewoon’s cheek and making him lift his head. Heewoon stared blankly, unsure what Gangwoo was agreeing with.

“Originally, I received reports even about what Sunbae ate… then one day, I felt like trash.”

His slow words were gentle.

“I can’t see this every day myself.”

‘But those bastards get to see it all day long,’ Gangwoo murmured softly, his eyes moving slightly as they captured every part of Heewoon’s face. “So, I got rid of the eyes watching Sunbae,” Gangwoo added, rubbing Heewoon’s cheek.

“It was a difficult decision, so Sunbae should cooperate a little.”

“Cooperate?”

“Tell me what you did, and call me constantly when you go somewhere.”

He spoke affectionately.

“Okay.”

Only then did Heewoon understand Gangwoo asking about his day in tedious detail. If the person Gangwoo assigned wasn’t monitoring him closely anymore, then the feeling of being watched lately…

Then was that black van really the loan sharks?