Chapter 50
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Did we not promise to live in eternal suffering?
—
That voice wasn’t directed at me.
It was reaching upward…
To the narrator.
Far above. The highest place. To the one who treats all life and death merely as stories for amusement.
—
Did we not promise to live in eternal suffering… and thus, in eternal pleasure!
—
And yet, the rage it spewed was aimed squarely at me.
At me, whom they believed to be favored.
There was nothing we could do but run. The “Citizens of 6” were swarming in, and realistically… how are we supposed to beat that?
Not in this condition.
—
Why, why!
—
A voice standing at the peak of pain and rage, twisted into fetishized pleasure… echoed out.
‘That bastard’s mental state…’
We’d need to sedate him first before anything else. What kind of diagnosis even fits that perverse ecstasy?
Complex PTSD. Emotional dissociation?
It’s the extreme form of emotional dysregulation where all feelings are twisted into extremes.
Perhaps even a pathological defense mechanism.
—
[And in a situation like this, you’re still making psychiatric diagnoses?]
[You’ve practically become a psychiatrist.]
—
This was desperation.
To keep myself from being consumed by overwhelming fear, so I wouldn’t suffer a debuff, I forced my mind elsewhere.
‘That thing is my patient.’
If someone like that came to me, what would I do?
Yeah. I know.
‘It’s deception.’
I know it too.
—
[And what would you diagnose this as?]
[They say a monk can’t shave his own head, so I’ll diagnose it for you.]
[Denial?]
[Denial, acknowledging the truth but refusing to face its severity.]
—
The “Citizens of 6” began blocking our path.
“We have to break through!”
Lee Hoin drew his greatsword and swung it wide, smashing the “Citizens of 6” aside with the flat of the blade. Like bowling pins, they collapsed in droves.
Through the gap…
Something else shot toward us.
“Feet!”
I was closest to the clown, so I could tell… it was aimed at our ankles.
—
[Oh? A whip?]
[Not just to bind ankles, it looks like it intends to sever them.]
[Efficient! If the ankles are gone, they can’t move forward.]
—
The narrator’s approving commentary passed by.
That whip didn’t discriminate between ally and enemy.
We barely dodged, but the “Citizens of 6” swarming around us couldn’t.
Thud.
Slash!
With a single sweep grazing their ankles, they lost their feet and collapsed.
And yet…
They didn’t scream.
No cries of pain.
With blind eyes, they crawled toward us, trying to grab our ankles.
A grotesque sight.
So grotesque that even as my breath reached my throat, I had no choice but to run faster.
Just a little further…
—
Do you think leaving will change anything?
—
The voice stabbed into my back.
—
Do you think escaping me now will change anything?
We are the supreme.
We will witness everything about you!
You cannot escape fate. Fate will always come to pass.
That is why it is called fate!
—
The words poured out like poison, trying to bind me with “fate.”
But I’m no worshipper of fate.
I don’t deny it… But I don’t glorify it either.
I’ve always believed willpower can change fate.
—
[A pioneer who believes in fate. How profound.]
—
So yeah, fuck that. I’m going to live.
I’ll die someday, sure. But I’ll cling on and live long enough to die of old age.
—
[Old age, you say. How amusing.]
[Very few die of old age. Especially not those who weren’t already elderly.]
[Even the elderly rarely get that luxury. What a grand dream you have!]
—
I’ll decide how my life ends.
—
This world has received too much fortune!
It must not survive.
Only by becoming the supreme can one survive.
And to become the supreme, all afflictions must be erased.
Affliction is the world.
Affliction is attachment.
—
At that calm voice, the hairs on my back stood on end.
I glanced behind…
The clown was charging on three legs like a rabid dog.
Grinning wide, black fluid dripping from its three mouths.
From the mouth on its abdomen, a tongue extended… thick and green, swaying around.
What, is it going to mop the floor with it?
—
[Passive-aggressive behavior.]
[Expressing negative emotions indirectly rather than directly.]
[Mockery counts as one form.]
—
While running like that, it pulled something out from its abdominal mouth.
How many functions did it pack into that body?
My breath really hit its limit.
Really… right up to my throat.
My lungs burned, the air tasting like blood.
“Hah… haaah…!”
I feel like I’m actually going to die.
Before that thing kills me, my lungs might collapse first.
Well… if I die like this, at least it’s a “natural death,” right? Not killed by someone else.
Lee Hoin grabbed my collar and dragged me forward.
“Exercise more, damn it!”
Says the cop and the athlete.
Hey… considering I was just a regular person, isn’t keeping up with you two already impressive?
“Hey–hah–shit–behind us!”
Being dragged like a rag, I looked back.
The clown, which had been pulling something from its mouth, now drew out a long spear.
It was massive, even for the clown.
If that pierced us, we’d die.
Well, anything would kill us if it pierced us… but that thing? Even a graze would be fatal.
It was so large that even brushing it would tear off a limb.
“Spear!”
At my shout, Lee Hoin turned and screamed.
Unable to swing his greatsword properly while dragging me, he threw me toward Lee Hyun.
“Hey, you can still run, right?!”
Lee Hyun caught me like a sack of rice and hoisted me over his shoulder.
At this point, I don’t care about my human rights.
Survival comes first.
—
[Is becoming a sack of rice your hobby?]
[That’s already twice you’ve been carried!]
—
Stop counting.
Ugh… blood rushing to my head, I lifted it and called out directions based on their perspective.
“Right!”
At my shout, the two split in opposite directions.
Lee Hoin carved a path wide with his greatsword, while Lee Hyun moved according to my calls and the openings Hoin created.
“Ugh…!”
Suppressing the urge to vomit, I kept calling directions.
Left. Center. Up. Down. Diagonal.
Because of the relentless, varied thrusts, even Lee Hoin and Lee Hyun began to tire.
Then Lee Hoin shouted through clenched teeth:
“We’re almost there!”
As if that was a trigger, the “Citizens of 6” surged in like a tidal wave.
Each time the clown thrust its spear, they were skewered and fell, but it kept pushing forward as if it were loyal.
And as I hung over Lee Hyun’s shoulder, I twisted to look ahead.
Through the swarm of “Citizens of 6,” I could see the ticket booth.
We were really… almost there.
And then…
—
Amusing. This is truly amusing.
Do you want to leave that badly?
Do you want to live that desperately?
—
At those words, poured out with maniacal laughter, I exhaled.
I already knew…
That clown wasn’t truly chasing us to kill.
It could have killed us anytime, but instead, like a cat playing with mice, it toyed with us.
Yes, entertainment.
Our desperate struggle to live was entertainment to it.
“Yeah. Even if you roll in shit, the living world’s still better.”
Where you live is the afterlife.
Where I stand is the living world.
The narrator fell silent.
The clown burst into laughter.
Then it stood still…
and drew the massive spear far back.
“!”
Anyone could tell it was about to throw.
“Looks like it’s throwing.”
No… not “looks like.”
“It’s throwing! It’s throwing the spear!”
Its arm went all the way back.
And then…
SHRAAAK
With a tearing sound, the spear shot forward… faster than anything.
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