How a Loan Shark Survives as an Actor Chapter 9

Chapter 9

 

As my turn drew closer, a variety of emotions appeared on the faces of the actors around me.

Most of them were far from positive.

From the moment I arrived in the reading room until just now, when I had offered my suggestion, the people who had developed a moderate degree of goodwill toward me began watching me cautiously.

I could practically read the determination on their faces: ‘Even if Yoo Seulho puts on the worst acting imaginable, living up to his infamous reputation, we’ll at least try not to laugh at him to his face.’

“Minjun heads home with dragging footsteps after finishing his part-time job.”

The moment the staff member read the stage direction, I heard Woo Junseo let out a deep sigh beside me.

The glare he’d been directing at me had disappeared. All that remained was a pair of eyes exhausted to the bone.

“Forget food. I just want to sleep first…”

The male lead’s subdued voice spread through the reading room.

3, 2, 1. Now.

“You’re still not dead?”

My voice cut in abruptly, deliberately delivered in a frivolous tone.

The atmosphere changed instantly, and Woo Junseo lightly frowned.

“Hyung, what kind of thing is that to say?”

“I said, why aren’t you dead? You need to die so I can collect the insurance money, you bastard.”

The words dripped with mockery.

I kept my tone light, making sure there wasn’t even the slightest weight behind my words.

“When’s your part-time pay coming in? I need to go to a PC bang.”

“I gave you money last week.”

“Hey, that was gone ages ago!”

At my shout, someone sitting nearby flinched.

They had been concentrating on the script, but that tiny reaction automatically drew my eyes sideways.

And then our gazes met.

Woo Junseo…

No.

Kang Minjun.

“You little shit. Are you seriously talking back to your only brother? That’s it. I guess you need a beating today.”

“I’m already tired enough without you acting like this. Please, let’s stop.”

“…What?”

I asked back while maintaining eye contact with my younger brother.

Was it a scoff?

A laugh?

Whatever escaped my mouth as a breath made him swallow hard.

The situation was so ridiculous it went beyond absurd and became funny.

‘This bastard actually dares…’

The amusement naturally turned to anger, and something began to boil inside me.

Watching him nervously gauge my reaction, I even felt justified in my rage.

‘Isn’t he insane?’

He knew he was in the wrong.

He knew I’d get angry.

And he did it on purpose anyway.

Then wouldn’t it be self-defense if I hit him?

No, as long as I didn’t kill him, it’d be fine.

As those thoughts raced through my head, I unconsciously clenched my jaw and lightly flexed my fist.

My younger brother watched every movement.

In the end, he spoke first.

“I-I mean… sorry. Hyung, I guess I was… a little sensitive today. Sorry, haha…”

There was humiliation in the way he forced out each word through gritted teeth.

Yet he was still trying to smile.

It felt pitiful, like a weaker animal exposing its belly and surrendering to a stronger one.

“Pfft—!”

I burst out laughing.

After laughing for quite a while, tears even formed in my eyes.

Wiping them away, I pretended to smack the back of his head.

“Hey, it’s only because I’m your hyung that I’m letting it slide. Got it? There’s no brother like me.”

“I know…”

“Try mouthing off again, and I’ll kill you. Remember that.”

Ah, this adorable little bastard.

Still unable to suppress my laughter, I turned around.

And what I saw in front of me was…

‘Ah.’

The script.

 

***

 

The first thing I saw after coming back to my senses was the script in my hands, now wrinkled and battered.

I was startled for a moment but quickly controlled my expression.

‘There it is again.’

When I practiced alone, I could immerse myself just enough to focus on intonation and tone.

But whenever I acted with someone else seriously, like last time or today, I always ended up losing my rationality halfway through.

‘Maybe it’s because I’m not actually an actor.’

If I couldn’t control it, that seemed like a problem.

Ugh. It irritated me to death.

‘How do real actors put up with this feeling?’

I had no intention of becoming some great actor.

I just wanted to climb high enough to get paid a lot.

‘Will I eventually get used to this unsettling feeling if I keep doing it?’

As I was thinking that, I noticed the staff member who should have been reading the next stage direction hadn’t spoken.

“…?”

Had they forgotten whose turn it was?

I looked up.

But everyone was staring at me.

I instinctively flinched.

What?

When I looked at the staff member with a confused expression, the man hurriedly adjusted his script and finally continued reading.

“Left alone, Minjun lets out a deep sigh, his emotions in turmoil.”

“…Haa.”

At that cue, Woo Junseo sighed a beat later.

He really was an actor.

It sounded like a genuine sigh.

‘And that’s the end of Episode 1.’

Were we moving straight into Episode 2?

Or would Director Jang interrupt again with feedback like before?

This was my first script reading, so I didn’t know.

But I did know I couldn’t look like a rookie.

Even while slowly closing my script and organizing my pen, nobody said a word.

What was going on?

‘Was my acting bad just now?’

No.

Aside from getting too immersed in the middle, everything came out exactly as intended.

The script had said:

‘Minwoo violently strikes Minjun on the back of the head.’

But thankfully, during the reading, instinct hadn’t taken over.

I’d only pretended to hit him.

There shouldn’t have been a problem.

Certain of that, I finally looked toward Director Jang.

Our eyes immediately met.

“Mr. Seulho.”

“Yes?”

“…Actually, never mind. Both of your performances were excellent just now. I don’t really have any feedback. Hmm… should we take a ten-minute break before Episode 2?”

Only then did everyone seem to snap out of it and start moving.

Although he’d announced a break, Director Jang immediately began whispering with the production staff beside him.

‘Are they talking behind my back?’

Honestly, I didn’t think I’d done badly enough to deserve that, which made the situation confusing.

I barely had any screen time to begin with.

Wasn’t this good enough?

It wasn’t like my performance had been painful to watch.

I tried reading Director Jang’s lips to guess what he was saying, then decided it was pointless and stood up.

‘Forget it.’

What’s the worst that can happen? I get cut from the project?

Planning to grab a drink from the vending machine, I left my seat.

But with every step I took, I could feel people’s eyes on me.

‘What the hell is going on?’

It was a kind of attention I’d never experienced before.

‘…Wait.’

For a brief moment, a thought crossed my mind.

‘Did everyone get shocked because my acting was too good?’

The moment I saw Choi Ran’s face, I immediately discarded that theory.

‘Just insult me openly instead.’

Choi Ran was staring at me with her eyes narrowed intensely.

At that point, “staring” was more accurate than “looking.”

Unlike the other actors, who occasionally glanced my way without making it obvious, she was acting entirely on impulse.

It was incredibly burdensome.

‘If it were a guy doing that, I’d have already asked what the hell he was staring at.’

But she was a girl twelve years younger than the original me.

That made it hard to say anything.

As I hurried out into the hallway to avoid her gaze, Hyun Jingae, who had been waiting in the corner, quickly followed after me.

“Hyung, was my acting bad?”

“What? No. Didn’t I already tell you? Watching you act almost makes me feel rewarded for all the beatings I’ve taken from you.”

“Then it was about the same as what I practiced over the past few days?”

“Maybe because you were acting with Junseo, but I thought it was even better. Why? Something bothering you? Ah, drink this first.”

For once, Hyun Jingae actually acted like a manager.

He handed me a takeaway cup, proudly explaining that he’d bought it earlier from the café during the opening part of the reading.

His thoroughness and attentiveness almost moved me.

‘Almost.’

That feeling vanished the moment I tasted it.

“Ugh, what the–”

“Huh? What’s wrong?”

The instant it touched my tongue, the taste nearly made me throw up.

I couldn’t control my expression.

‘I knew it.’

A manager, my ass.

This bastard was trying to kill me.

The horrifying flavor lingering in my mouth made it impossible to think about Choi Ran’s expression or anything else.

I scowled and glared at Hyun Jingae.

“What is this? Poison? How could you betray me like this?”

“Poison? What poison, you lunatic? It’s a mint smoothie! I specially bought it because it’s your favorite… no, seriously? I do something nice for you, and you complain?”

“Favorite? What are you talking about? Seriously. This is ridiculous. There are actually people who pay money to drink this?”

“…You crazy bastard. You’re the one who’s always drinking it.”

Hyun Jingae stared at me in disbelief.

Meanwhile, all I wanted was to rip my tongue out.

I snatched the cash from his pocket and sprinted toward the vending machine.

Thunk.

The moment I spotted a familiar isotonic sports drink, I hurriedly twisted off the cap and rinsed my mouth.

“Ugh. I hate this so much.”

“How does someone’s taste change this suddenly? I remembered you buying it all the time. Honestly, I thought you’d be touched.”

“I’m so touched I want to grab you by the collar. Come over here.”

At my affectionate invitation, Hyun Jingae immediately retreated and disappeared.

Left alone in front of the vending machine, I continued rinsing my mouth with the sports drink while silently resenting Yoo Seulho.

‘My mouth feels like it’s rotting.’

It reminded me of something from long ago.

One of the junior organization members, Hwang Taejun, had once brought me a new drink he’d discovered.

I nearly threw up after one sip.

I wasn’t some kind of gourmet.

Usually, if something tasted bad, I’d simply think, ‘Well, that’s bad,’ and drink it anyway.

But that thing had been so revolting it sent chills down my spine.

I’d rushed to the restroom, spat it out, and rinsed my mouth several times.

When I returned to the office, I found the others had already forced Taejun into a punishment stance.

The poor guy was on the verge of tears, insisting he’d bought it because he thought I’d like it.

I couldn’t bring myself to scold him and simply told him to get up.

I hadn’t tasted anything like it since then, so I hadn’t realized before.

But there was a very high probability that drink had also been this “mint” or whatever nuisance it was called.

‘Looks like Yoo Seulho’s tastes are something I should automatically distrust from now on.’

Still, thanks to that, my head felt clear again.

Much more refreshed than before, I returned to the reading room.

The others looked perfectly normal now as well.

Nobody was sneaking glances at me anymore.

Everyone was chatting cheerfully.

Relieved, I moved to sit down.

Then I felt a piercing gaze from directly ahead and instinctively looked up.

“…”

What exactly was her problem?

Choi Ran was staring at me just as intensely as before.

Unable to endure that passionate gaze any longer, I finally spoke first.

“Um… do you have something you want to say?”

At my cautious question, Choi Ran answered as if she’d been waiting for it.

“Where did you learn that?”