Debuting by Riding the Returnee’s Bus Chapter 18

‘Even I know this sounds weird, but….’

 

“No matter how many times I look at it, I think you shouldn’t dance, hyung.”

 

I had no choice but to say it again.

 

Of course, I knew it was wrong to force a sacrifice on Joo Wooyoung. Normally, the priority would be to pull up the performance of the other four, but I realized this wasn’t something that could be solved simply by practicing more.

 

I could guarantee that even if the other four members’ skills surpassed Joo Wooyoung’s….

 

‘Everyone will probably only see Joo Wooyoung.’

 

I was one hundred percent sure of it.

 

Naturally, I wasn’t trying to keep him in check or being jealous or envious. I wasn’t just trying to look out for the other three who were steeped in a sense of defeat, either. From the perspective of the audience and the judges it was simply the only choice that made sense if we cared about the overall balance of the performance.

 

Although the mission was fundamentally designed around the <Nobility> member being the center, we couldn’t ignore the performance’s overall quality. After all, this was a team mission, and we were being evaluated as a group.

 

I looked away from my phone screen and up at Joo Wooyoung. He still had a puzzled expression on his face. Fortunately, he didn’t look offended or annoyed. He seemed to think I had some other deeper meaning in mind.

 

Joo Wooyoung looked at me with a thoughtful expression and opened his mouth.

 

“What does that mean?”

 

“The gaze is focused too heavily on you, hyung.”

 

“It doesn’t really look that way to me… If you ask me, you’re the one…”

 

‘See? He doesn’t realize it himself.’

 

“No. You’re the only one people can see. It could be an advantage, sure, but if we’re looking at the performance as a whole, I think it’s a problem. If this mission were judged by viewer votes, it wouldn’t matter. Even if we went on stage exactly like this, it wouldn’t hurt you at all. But if it’s judged by the panel, it’ll be different. They’re definitely going to evaluate the balance of the performance.”

 

“Hmm….”

 

“Of course, the choice is yours, hyung. Honestly, it might be hard to understand why I’m saying this. But I’m not doing this to push you out of the center. It’s just….”

 

“No. I know that’s not what you’re doing.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yeah. I don’t know exactly what you’re thinking… but I’m a bit ignorant about these things. I don’t know for sure, but it seems right to follow your word.”

 

‘This… is a bit too much pressure.’

 

It didn’t look like he was trying to test me or observe me. It really looked like he trusted Lee Unha and was leaving the judgment to Lee Unha.

 

‘Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything.’

 

It was only natural that a crushing sense of pressure suddenly settled over me. I had similar experiences with that mad dark mage. Of course, he never trusted me, a slave, enough to give me a task, but I still remembered how he’d casually ask for my opinion on experiments and important matters.

 

He’d go ahead with his own plans anyway, and then use it as an excuse to torment me if the experiment failed or if something went wrong.

 

Of course, my current Master seemed quite generous, so he wouldn’t pull the same kind of crap as my previous Master, but the thought that I might lose Joo Wooyoung’s trust in one go made me lose my cool.

 

‘Was I too reckless? Should I have stayed out of it?’

 

“Then… can you tell me what you’re thinking?”

 

“I-I’ll tell you that later.”

 

“Huh? Why?”

 

“I mean… in the afternoon. It’s better to say it when the cameras are rolling.”

 

“Ah! I see!”

 

“Yes….”

 

“Then I’ll be looking forward to it.”

 

‘Please don’t look forward to it. Please.’

 

“I-I’ll head back to the room now. See you later, hyung.”

 

“Yeah. Get some rest.”

 

His warm, kind smile eased my anxiety a little, but people like that usually left you feeling even worse when you disappointed them. I was especially worried because I hadn’t actually thought of a specific solution yet.

 

The pressure that I had to find a solution before the afternoon—or everything would fall apart—weighed heavily on my shoulders.

 

‘What do I do? How am I supposed to solve this? Is there any way at all?’

 

Would it be better to just take it back?

 

Wouldn’t it be smarter to go back now, cancel what I’d said, and apologize before he got his hopes up?

 

Was I being too arrogant for a slave?

 

Come to think of it, nothing good ever came from speaking up. Among the slaves, those who flapped their mouths to look good to the Master or to become a favorite always met a bad end.

 

Even as I headed to my room, biting my nails and pacing nervously, I couldn’t stop these anxious thoughts. I knew the current situation wasn’t the same as before, and I knew I didn’t need to be this anxious, but it was like a habit engraved deep in my mind. The agitation wouldn’t fade.

 

My breathing felt uneven. I started getting self-conscious about whether I was breathing properly. My senses and mind were as sharp and sensitive as they could get.

 

<<Emergency Quest>>

[You, with a 1% contribution to the Demon King’s defeat. Assist the Hero Joo Wooyoung, who had a 99% contribution, and debut together. This is a golden opportunity to become the Hero’s companion.]

<<Penalty for Quest Refusal or Failure: Return to the Other World>>

 

Furthermore, my eyes drifted to the Emergency Quest. The thought that I might return to the Other World made me feel trapped in a prison of my own making. Since this would be my first performance with Joo Wooyoung, the pressure to make everything succeed made my fingers begin to tremble.

 

Several minutes passed like that.

 

Pacing in front of the door, I realized there was no point in continuing like this. I took one deep breath and opened the door, only to see a familiar sight.

 

“Whew….”

 

The scene before me was no different than before. The Hopeless Trio—No. 98, 78, and 45—were still sprawled out. And then….

 

“You really went to the practice room? Did you sweat a lot?”

 

Immediately, they looked at me and started spewing unpleasant words. I turned my head to see it was the thug, No. 98.

 

“I told you he’d be like that. Acting all hard-working by himself to make us look like losers.”

 

“?”

 

“You knew the CCTVs were rolling in the practice room, didn’t you? If you go there and practice alone, we’re the ones who look like sh*t. Isn’t that right?”

 

“True.”

 

“Being diligent is fine. Yeah. Hard work is great. You should work hard since you’re here. Of course, you should work hard to debut. But aren’t you being a bit too inconsiderate of us? Isn’t resting together when it’s time to rest also part of teamwork? If footage of you practicing there gets aired….”

 

“So what?”

 

“……”

 

“……”

 

“……”

 

“Huh?”

 

“What’s the problem?”

 

“Ha! F*ck, this is unbelievable. Hey. Fix your eyes.”

 

“You didn’t even intend to practice anyway, you don’t even intend to debut here, yet you’re worried about how you’ll look on TV?”

 

“What?”

 

“You guys won’t debut anyway. Don’t you know that yourselves? Isn’t that why you’re wasting time like idiots? Sprawled out watching TV, taking selfies on your phones… I don’t even know what you’re doing. You’re doing this because you have no intention of debuting, right?”

 

“What?! F*ck!”

 

“You know it too. Since you stood next to Joo Wooyoung. You realized there’s no hope, so you’re acting like this. You just have your useless pride left.”

 

“What?! What did you just say? Hey! Let go! F*ck! Let me go! You son of a b*tch!! Vitamin? My a**. You’re just a bastard wearing a mask!”

 

“Aren’t you wearing a mask too? Stop talking nonsense and look me in the eye. You know it. I know it, and all the staff know it. You guys won’t debut. Forget debuting, just making the Top 80 would be a miracle.”

 

I heard No. 45 mutter.

 

“Isn’t that a bit too harsh? We’re working hard in our own way.”

 

“I’m just giving you a reality check. Your self-introduction mission will be edited down to 10 or 20 seconds anyway, and the Slave Auction mission was too pathetic to watch. At best, the only thing that’ll make the broadcast is you crying after getting picked by Wooyoung hyung. No, before that, did you really come here because you wanted to debut?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“I asked if you really came here because you wanted to debut.”

 

“Th—that’s….”

 

“Right. You came because you wanted to get your face out there. Make an impression on the public while you were at it, and if you got lucky, maybe you’d debut. That’s what you were thinking, wasn’t it? If you weren’t interested in this industry in the first place, you wouldn’t even be here.”

 

“Hey.”

 

“But do you know something? If a miracle happens and you actually debut, it’ll be harder than it is now. It’ll be the same even if you go to another group. It’ll be incomparably harder than this.”

 

“……”

 

“Do you know the average sleep time for an idol is 4 hours? What, 4 hours? There are idols who only sleep 2 or 3 hours when things get tough. And you’re telling me you can’t even come to practice because you’re tired after practicing until dawn? What kind of bullsh*t is that?”

 

“……”

 

“Why the hell did you even come on Idol Classism? Just to steal someone else’s opportunity?”

 

“……”

 

“Hyungs. Even if you don’t debut here, you’re not planning to quit this life afterward anyway, are you? Right? You’re all just going to go back to your agencies and keep chasing this dream. Even if you’re unlucky enough not to debut, you’re still planning to make a living showing your face somehow, aren’t you? That’s why you’re sitting around watching livestreams and taking selfies all day.”

 

“What?!”

 

“Then, instead of just sitting around here, you should try to look good to me, hyungs.”

 

“You—what did you say, you crazy bastard?!”

 

“I said, you need to look good to me.”

 

“What? Why should we….”

 

“I’m going to debut.”

 

“What kind of bullsh*t is that….”

 

“With Joo Wooyoung! F*ck! I’m going to debut!!”

 

“……”

 

“I’m going to debut with Joo Wooyoung! I’m going to hit the top and I’m not coming down! You need to look good to me! If you’re going to sell your face later—whether you do internet streaming, debut in a flop group at another agency, become an actor, whatever—if you’re going to live by selling your face, you need to look good to me, no, to Joo Wooyoung! Instead of wasting time like idiots! You should be running to the practice room right now and practicing together until the soles of your feet peel off!”

 

“Huh?”

 

“That way, I can push for you later. That way, I can mention you on Insta and give you some exposure. You have to work hard for me to have good memories of you and back you up. It’ll give you a good story, too. You can say you practiced with Lee Unha, that we’re good friends, that I’m a good dongsaeng to know, right?”

 

No. 98, who had been seething the whole time, finally shook off No. 78, who was trying to hold him back, and shoved me. A loud thud rang out as I hit the cabinet. I felt a dull impact against the back of my head, but it seemed No. 98 knew he absolutely couldn’t actually hit me.

 

“You… you son of a b*tch! What do you know! You disgusting bastard!”

 

“Do you have any intention of debuting?”

 

“You son of a b*tch!!”

 

“Even if you get cut from here, are you going to keep doing this?”

 

I looked calmly into his eyes and saw his distorted face. I worried for a second that he might throw a punch, but instead, No. 98 grabbed my collar and his hands began to tremble violently.

 

And then….

 

“……”

 

I saw No. 98 suddenly burst into tears.

 

“Ugh.”

 

“?”

 

“I—I! I want to! De—debut. I’m going to debut… sob. F*ck! F*ck!!”

 

“……”

 

“Ugh. I said I’m going to debut!!”

 

“……”

 

“Me too… you bastard! Sob. I’m going to debut too! Even if I get cut from here, f*ck! I’m going to debut too! I’m going to hit the top and I’m not coming down! F*ck!! Sob… ugh! I’m definitely going to debut! And… you bastard! I’m going to climb higher than you, Joo Wooyoung, and Jegal Hwi! F*ck! I’ll hit the Billboard! I’ll do tons of performances! I’ll make tons of money!! I’ll buy a building!!! My younger sibling! Mom, Dad, Grandma, Grandpa—I’ll bring them all, and we’ll watch music shows together and I’ll hold concerts!! F*ck!! Sob….”

 

As I snapped out of it and looked around the room, I saw the Hopeless Trio all bawling their eyes out.

 

‘Ah… I think I messed up.’

 

I realized immediately that I had made a mistake. Due to excessive pressure and stress, I had completely lost my temper.