Keep Going Crazy Chapter 18

After sending the text, Ryeoun leaned back against the car seat for a moment and closed his eyes.

His feelings were a bit complicated. But he couldn’t think of a better option either. In his own view, changing the appointment was the best course of action.

Hao was a friend he could barely see even once a year, and Aiden was someone he could see throughout the entire Grand Prix anyway.

If he had to set priorities, then naturally Li Hao came first. The time to talk with Aiden could be rescheduled anytime. But appointments with Hao didn’t come around easily.

Yet contrary to that rational judgment, a corner of his heart felt somewhat uncomfortable. Perhaps it was because this was the first time Aiden had approached him first?

Ryeoun opened his eyes and looked at his phone again. There was still no reply from Aiden.

They had been exchanging texts just a moment ago, and the fact that no response was coming made him wonder if something had happened.

Just in case Aiden might misunderstand, Ryeoun left another message.

[I’m sorry again. Leave me a time that works for you.]

He had apologized three times now. This should be enough for him to understand, he thought.

Ryeoun lightly opened the car door and stepped out. Sending a message to Hao asking where he wanted to meet, Ryeoun slowly walked forward. It seemed like a good idea to have dinner first before going to see Hao.

∞ ∞ ∞

The meeting place with Hao was a small bar directly to the left of the W Hotel. It was a spot Hao had chosen—a place with private table spacing and a quiet interior, perfect for having a conversation.

It wasn’t a private room, but the space was rather unique, with everything separated by thin curtain-like fabric.

After ordering tea instead of alcohol, the two sat across from each other.

“Something wrong?”

“Ah… no.”

Ryeoun, who had been glaring at his phone, turned his head.

In the end, no contact came from Aiden. He had expected either an acknowledgment, a question about what was going on, or a message setting a new meeting time… but there was no reply at all.

That frustration kept making him glance at his phone. It was already well past 8 o’clock, which made him even more concerned. He had called once in between, but Aiden didn’t pick up. Still, since the signal went through, it didn’t seem like his phone was off. He figured Aiden would get in touch eventually.

Hao, whom he hadn’t seen in a while, had an even brighter expression than before.

“You keep looking at your phone. Did you get a girlfriend?”

At the teasing question, Ryeoun lightly stuck out his tongue.

“When do I have time for that?”

“You don’t make time for dating by having time; you make time for it.”

“You should date a lot.”

“I’m already working hard at it.”

The two looked at each other and laughed.

“How’s your body?”

Hao asked. Ryeoun shrugged.

“Nothing’s wrong with it. Do you always ask how I’m doing every time we meet?”

“Because I’m worried. F1 isn’t exactly an easy sport. And you crashed hard in Melbourne.”

“…Well, I didn’t get hurt badly. Just a few minor bruises?”

“I was incredibly worried.”

“Is that why you came running as soon as I arrived in China?”

“Not exactly that, but.”

Ryeoun leaned back comfortably in his chair.

He had known Hao since the F3 days. Hao, who hadn’t even been on the same team, had his own good reasons for worrying about Ryeoun.

During the F3 days, Ryeoun had been very seriously injured.

The moment when the tires scraped against the ground and slid is still vivid. The race car carrying Ryeoun spun as if flying through the air. The car, crashed right in front of the grandstands, was crumpled like an aluminum can.

He had always been aware that racing was dangerous. But it had never hit him in reality. Minor and major accidents and injuries hadn’t been much of an issue, and those things were quickly forgotten.

Back then, Ryeoun was much more reckless and daring than he was now. He gained attention for his aggressive driving, and that was Ryeoun’s weapon as well.

‘You’re going to die someday.’

Someone had said that as a joke. Ryeoun had laughed it off, saying that in F3, even if you wanted to die, you probably couldn’t. Perhaps he could say that because he was only 16, a young age.

Debris from the car scattered across various parts of the circuit. He was aware that he needed to get out of the car, but he simply couldn’t move. His left leg burned hot. It was pain he had never experienced in his life.

The moment the pain passed a certain threshold, Ryeoun lost consciousness.

The acrid smell of burning, the commotion of the spectators, wailing voices, searing pain… Everything slowly faded away.

When he opened his eyes in the hospital room, Ryeoun briefly wondered if he was still alive. He couldn’t tell if it was heaven, hell, or reality.

The moment he saw his mother’s face, sobbing uncontrollably, Ryeoun realized it. That he had survived safely.

He had metal rods inserted into his leg. It was a major surgery. Since the operation was performed while he was unconscious, there was no pain from the surgery itself. By the time he opened his eyes, everything was already over.

The driver who had collided with Ryeoun at that time was Hao. The two were often mentioned together as rivals during their F3 days, even more so because their performances were similar.

People might think rivals generally have bad relationships. But Hao and Ryeoun got along very well.

Part of it was because they were both Asian drivers, uncommon in the Formula industry, and they were the same age with compatible personalities.

They competed with everything they had on the track, but once they got out of the racing car, they were friends they could rely on more than anyone else.

The accident that day couldn’t be blamed on anyone. The competition between them had flared up intensely, and neither had yielded at all. Hao often said it was his fault… but Ryeoun didn’t think so.

Apart from Ryeoun being seriously injured, Hao was relatively in good condition. Hao came to his hospital room and sobbed, apologizing. It was so funny that Ryeoun took several pictures and teased him about it.

And then, in the early morning when everyone had gone or fallen asleep, Ryeoun stared blankly at the TV and cried secretly to himself.

‘Will I be able to return?’

Because he was young, his recovery ability was exceptional. But once he had experienced an accident, a sudden sense of unease began to consume Ryeoun.

He hadn’t realized it until now because driving had always been pure joy. He hadn’t known just how dangerous a world he was part of. No matter how much the world improved and regulations changed, drivers are inevitably exposed to danger.

Yet he still wanted to return.

Even if he got hurt, fell, and broke bones again, he wanted to drive again. He wanted to throw everything he had into the exhilarating world of speed and fine control.

Ryeoun gritted his teeth and began rehabilitation. And he recovered faster than anyone. In fact, the one who didn’t recover was Hao.

Hao suffered from PTSD and ultimately couldn’t grip the steering wheel again. Only Ryeoun made his return.

Ryeoun felt a lingering regret about that. If no accident had happened to Hao, he would have become an F1 driver very quickly.

He might have even received a call-up to F1, skipping F2 altogether. He was that talented and promising a super rookie.

But Hao resolutely gave up the title of driver.

‘I don’t think I can overcome it.’

On the day Ryeoun returned to F3, Hao came to find Ryeoun in person and said that. Ryeoun silently pulled Hao into an embrace.

Admitting that he couldn’t overcome his trauma must have taken tremendous courage. It was regrettable, but Ryeoun respected Hao’s decision. And he wanted to run for Hao’s share as well. It felt like he had to.

“How’s Helix?”

Hao’s question pierced through Ryeoun’s ears as he briefly reminisced about the old days.

“Huh?”

“I’m asking about Helix. Is the car okay? Have you adapted? How’s Aiden? Is the director treating you well? No harassing sponsors?”

“Whoa, are you really going to keep acting like my mom?”

Even as he retorted, Ryeoun couldn’t help but laugh. It was because Hao, smaller and cuter than himself, was trying so hard to look after him, which he found rather endearing.

“Your mother is in Korea. So I have to take care of you instead.”

“Oh, thank you~ so much.”

“You’re welcome.”

After that, the two continued chatting lightly, talking about what had been going on. Ryeoun didn’t bother telling Hao about what had happened with Aiden.

It wasn’t that Hao would offer some amazing solution, and anyway, he thought it was something he had to resolve directly with Aiden.

As they chatted, time had passed 9 o’clock without them noticing. Checking the clock inside the store, Ryeoun picked up his phone.

It was because, suddenly, Aiden came to mind again.

[0 new messages]

“….”

But surprisingly, his phone remained silent.

There wasn’t a single contact from Aiden.