I’m Not Doing This With A Friend Chapter 117

 

To avoid making Carson suspicious, I hurriedly brought up another topic.

 

“Speaking of which, the succession banquet is already next week, isn’t it?”

 

“Oh, Fjord’s brother’s succession to the Marquisate?”

 

Fjord had insisted that he was a knight by birth and asked his parents and Lou to respect that.

 

In the end, the title of Marquis was given to Fjord’s older brother, Lou.

 

It wasn’t a sudden decision, of course, but a gradual process that took place after the second-year academic festival.

 

Now, a few years later, the succession banquet was finally held, where Lou would officially take over as Marquis.

 

As the heir to the Duchy of Lysianthus, Carson was of course invited, and I was invited separately.

 

A handwritten invitation from Lou himself.

 

‘How could I not go after all this?’

 

“Yes. Caon, have you decided on a gift for Lou?”

 

“Is that even necessary?”

 

“…Isn’t that basic courtesy?”

 

This guy really has no idea how to function in society.

 

I suddenly felt a surge of respect for the Duchess.

 

Alas, the Duchess.

 

What kind of life have you been living with two Lysianthus men?

 

What kind of life do you lead?

 

I decided to save my admiration for later, in person, and spoke up.

 

“Caon, I don’t want you to be judged by others, you know what I mean?”

 

“…Do you think jewelry would do?”

 

“Let’s make sure it’s beautifully crafted.”

 

“Yes.”

 

In praise, I reached for Carson’s hair. He naturally bowed his head to level with mine.

 

As I watched him purr and close his eyes at my slow stroking, I thought, ‘This is the beautiful jewel.’

 

‘You’re such a dog.’

 

Not in a weary way, but in a literal sense.

 

Seeing Carson like that makes me feel at ease. I wonder if that’s why.

 

My mouth moved automatically, letting my honest feelings come out.

 

“Caon. You know what? I actually don’t want to go to the succession banquet.”

 

“If you don’t want to go, don’t go.”

 

It was a very Carson response. I removed my hand from stroking his hair.

 

“Why don’t you ask me why I don’t want to go?”

 

Carson stared at my hand, then smiled slowly.

 

“I can ask why later, it’s not too late. What matters is your will.”

 

This time he tugged at my hair. He slowly bows his head, looking almost reverent.

 

Time passed slowly as if it had stopped.

 

His red lips landed on the end of my hair. I was wishing those lips were anywhere but on my hair.

 

His voice tickled my ear, so sweet, “May I ask why, then?”

 

Facing his calm presence, I felt strangely close to tears. I felt comforted.

 

The corners of my eyes twitched.

 

“I’m afraid I’ll run into Rex Begonia in the banquet hall. I don’t want to see him.”

 

No, I’m more than afraid. At the thought of Rex Begonia, my body began to tense up.

 

The trembling doesn’t stop. I resented myself for being so helpless in his presence.

 

For a moment, a gleam flashed in Carson’s eyes, then it was gone.

 

I smiled weakly at him. That’s right. Carson must have realized it by now.

 

That there was something between me and Rex Begonia.

 

Carson told me he’d investigated me before.

 

That Rex Begonia had tried to have me as his duchess, but the Duchess of Begonia was very tight-lipped about it.

 

A light background check would not have revealed this.

 

And then there was Rex Begonia’s hand on mine, a fact known only to the two of us.

 

‘When will I be able to tell you all of this? And when I do, what will your reaction be?’

 

Would you be furious and declare that you would tear Rex Begonia to shreds?

 

Or would you comfort me with my past?

 

I blinked slowly down at the thought.

 

Whatever it was, I couldn’t wait for it to come.

 

I don’t know how long we stayed like that. I felt his warmth against my body. He was wrapping his arms around me and holding me very delicately.

 

“I promise you. You won’t see him in the banquet hall.”

 

“…I don’t mind if you hold me tight.”

 

No, actually, I wanted it. I needed him to hug me harder. So that this trembling would stop.

 

Harder. I clung to him harder, like I was hanging on for dear life.

 

My throat felt dry.

 

“… A promise is a promise.”

 

Carson flinched for a moment, but then he held me tightly against him.

 

“Yes.”

 

At the sound of his voice, the trembling magically ceased.

 

‘Ah… I loved him so much.’

 

Almost enough to make me thank that disgusting Rex Begonia.

 

For creating the situation that forced me to flee to the Academy.

 

For giving me the chance to meet Carson.

 

🍃

 

“Ah, the dang sugar rush.”

 

I lamented, tossing back my head as I sat at my desk in my lab. I don’t often crave sweets, but today was different.

 

It was Mother Nature’s once-a-month call.

 

Some people don’t like it, but I always found myself craving something sweet on those days.

 

“Tomorrow is the banquet for Fjord’s brother’s succession, so why start today?” I thought.

 

I had taken painkillers, so my stomach wouldn’t hurt, but I had a lot on my mind.

 

“Come to think of it…”

 

Whenever I felt the call of Mother Nature, Carson would always bring me food at the right time.

 

After I developed the painkiller, the timing seemed to be a little off.

 

Eventually, it got to the point where we had a constant supply of snacks in the clubroom.

 

No way. Did Mother Nature know I was feeling the call of the wild and bring me food?

 

If that’s true, it’s going to be a hell of a ride.

 

“I’ll bind him in marriage and take him with me for the rest of my life.”

 

With that thought, I hugged the thing I had tucked inside my clothes. It was a warm packet of liquid.

 

Aaah… great, all right.

 

Jane was a genius for thinking of this.

 

As I basked in the warmth with a languid expression on my face, I suddenly began to speak to the reusable pouch as if it were a person.

 

“You pretty thing.”

 

I gently stroked the bag’s belly with my hand.

 

“Thank you for coming to me.”

 

And then.

 

Clank!

 

I jumped at the sharp popping sound and quickly looked toward the source.

 

“I, I’m sorry.”

 

“It’s okay. Are you hurt?”

 

I had asked her to bring me a cup of tea earlier, but she must have missed the tray on the way in.

 

The glass teapot and teacup had touched the floor and shattered.

 

“Thank you for your concern. I’ll clean it up quickly and bring your tea back.”

 

Luckily, she’s not quite at the level of panic, so she quickly composes herself and ducks her head.

 

“Never mind about the tea.”

 

As I watched her clean up the shards of broken glass, I idly mused.

 

If only I could take a reusable water pouch to the banquet tomorrow.

 

“After all, if my stomach shows, I’ll probably have to wear a dress, right?”

 

“Yeah, yes…?”

 

As if hearing her thoughts to herself, the maid gave a bemused look.

 

“It’s nothing.”

 

After a moment, the maid left, sweeping the floor neatly.

 

I was so engrossed that I didn’t even hear the knock. I shifted my gaze back to my desk and suddenly realized I’d clipped a newspaper article.

 

It was about a plague that had recently appeared in the Abascanthus Empire.

 

As soon as Abascanthus received the news, they immediately shut down the entire area where the plague had occurred.

 

This was tantamount to abandoning the people who lived there.

 

The Empire’s defense was that it was necessary to protect the rest of the population.

 

Initially outraged at the cruelty, the people slowly began to feel relieved that they were not among the locals.

 

I thought a lot about this, but there was something else that caught my attention.

 

It was the symptoms of the disease. Starting with a mild headache and fever, it looked like the common cold, and then gradually the skin became tingly and painful.

 

Later, a slow decay of the body, starting with the heart and faraway parts of the body.

 

The symptoms were very similar to what my late parents had. But there were some differences that made me think it was the same disease.

 

Firstly, my parents’ disease was not contagious. Many priests and doctors tried to cure my parents’ illness.

 

But not a single one of them had contracted the disease.

 

“Neither I nor Arcandus, who nursed my parents every day, caught it.”

 

I wondered if the disease was transmitted through blood or saliva.

 

However, the disease in Abascanthus was more likely to be found in families and groups.

 

And whereas the disease took my parents over a year to fight and die, the progression of this disease was incomparably faster.

 

Three months after the disease first appeared.

 

And already the death rate keeps rising…

 

I don’t know if I’m lucky or unlucky that it’s not the same as my parents’ disease.

 

But one thing is for sure, I don’t like this situation.

 

🍃

 

“Okay, Caon. Take a deep breath.”

 

“Whoo…”

 

Carson exclaimed, unable to even open his eyes properly.

 

“Pull yourself together. Fight against yourself!”

 

“Ha, but Leen. This is too…”

 

“Do you want to keep sounding weak?”

 

Carson hadn’t been able to look directly at me, all decked out for the succession banquet.

 

So, he was practicing making full eye contact with me now.

 

With no control magic, of course.

 

“Open your eyes, Caon.”

 

At the firm command of my voice, he opened his eyes slightly. But after less than a second, his eyelids slammed shut.

 

“Hm… I can’t.”

 

“You were fine when we met at the party during winter break freshman year, but what’s wrong with you today?”

 

This time, it’s not like I’m dressed up by Jane like I was for the prom.

 

“I threw a few control spells on myself in a hurry back then…”

 

I giggled and said, “Let’s just try it for thirty seconds. If you do well, I’ll give you a prize.”

 

Carson’s eyes widen at the mention of a prize. His expression as he looked at me threatened to break, but somehow he managed to hold on.

 

One second, two seconds…

 

The promised 30 seconds passed.

 

Overjoyed, I grinned widely and praised Carson.

 

“See, if you try, you can do it.”

 

“Phew!”

 

He let out the breath he’d been holding and quickly looked away.

 

“Can I get my prize now?”

 

I asked with a smirk, “What do you want? I’ll give anything I can get you.”

 

“…Anything?”

 

I momentarily pause to wince. I must have said the wrong thing.

 

But it didn’t seem like Carson would ask too much of me.

 

“Yeah, anything.”

 

Carson blushed profusely at what he was thinking.

 

“That…”

 

“That?”

 

“Are you sure you’re okay with anything?”

 

He fidgeted, his gaze downcast. I tilted my head at a slight angle.

 

“What are you so shy about…”

 

“Then let me kiss you.”