I Became The Male Lead’s Female Friend Chapter 138

 

What the hell was he talking about?

 

I blinked in a daze. Then I looked up at him with a sudden thought.

 

“Is it because of what happened a few days ago?”

 

Lord River hadn’t been at the ducal residence at the time, but it had caused such a stir in the manor that I wondered if he’d heard about it upon his return.

 

So he said something offhanded like, ‘I’m glad you’re safe.’

 

But instead, he stood in front of me, dumbfounded.

 

“What happened to you?”

 

“Yes, the one where the maid was caught trying to poison the food.”

 

His face stiffened.

 

“Poison… you mean?”

 

“There was more than that, but… you didn’t hear?”

 

“Not at all…”

 

He shook his head, his words trailing off as if he didn’t know anything.

 

However, his expression was even darker than before, and I couldn’t help but ask him a question.

 

“Then, what did you mean when you said you were glad…?”

 

“That’s…”

 

He was about to say something when he glanced to the side, where Mrs. Fedwick, who had been with me earlier, stood.

 

She had been frozen in place since we had spoken, and she held his gaze in wordless silence.

 

He stared at her for a moment, then turned his head back to me and said with a thin smile.

 

“I will speak to you later.”

 

Then quickly walked back into the party.

 

My eyes narrowed as I watched his back.

 

I wondered what on earth he was doing at the party, what he was about to say, and whether he was too busy to accompany me.

 

Judging from his concern for the woman next to me, I knew it wasn’t something he wanted anyone else to hear.

 

I swallowed a sigh, trying to calm my fluttering heart.

 

‘I’ll just have to ask him when we dance.’

 

With that thought, I shook off my anxiety… but by then I had forgotten something important.

 

Before I could dance with Lord River and ask him, I still had someone significant to face first.

 

And I had only just realized that upon entering the party when my thoughts turned to contemplation.

 

‘Aha!’

 

I was going to have a ‘first dance’ with Rudrick.

 

In a way, it was predictable. Normally, the first dance at a party was reserved for the host and the person with the highest status among the invitees.

 

So it was only natural that Rudrick and I would be the first to dance.

 

Of course, until recently, I thought that was correct, but now things have changed a bit.

 

We were just…

 

‘I haven’t seen him since we parted ways like that!’

 

Until this morning, I think we were still thinking about it.

 

I had completely forgotten about it with the sudden appearance of Lord River. My mind had even gone blank when I saw Rudrick enter the room.

 

But Rudrick seemed unaffected.

 

He stood in front of me, looking his usual although not at all his usual dapper self, and casually extended his hand.

 

At this point, I was frozen in place, wondering what to do.  I eventually took his hand with a nervous look on my face.

 

But when the music started, and we were about to start dancing, I noticed something was wrong.

 

‘He doesn’t look fine at all.’

 

Rather, he was overly stiff, despite his appearance.

 

Of course, to others, he was perfectly fine.

 

From the outside, he was the very definition of a ‘cold northern duke’: his face was emotionless, and his movements were impeccable.

 

But I was close to him, and I could tell.

 

‘Why are you so stiff?’

 

He even missed a beat from time to time. It was so natural that no one noticed, but I witnessed it all.

 

And then I realized why he was doing this, and I clicked my tongue a little.

 

‘Ugh, if you’re going to do this, why did you draw the line?’

 

Seeing him like this, it was like he hadn’t changed at all.

 

When he was younger, if we ever had an argument or something upset him, he’d always show his frustration in this way.

 

‘He’s exactly the same.’

 

I almost laughed out loud at the flashback. I tried to keep my expression straight and instead, I spoke first. Surprisingly, it was Rudrick who spoke first.

 

“Before…”

 

To my surprise, it was Rudrick who spoke first. Unable to look me in the eye, he continued slowly.

 

“I didn’t mean… I didn’t mean it in a bad way.”

 

“…”

 

“I’m not asking you to leave because you’re a nuisance or a hassle… I’m just…”

 

At the uncharacteristic gibberish, I narrowed my eyes.

 

I was dumbfounded that he would say something like that, but at the same time, a strange feeling rose in me.

 

After staring at him for a moment, I blurted out.

 

” I already packed my things.”

 

“…What?”

 

“They told me to leave, so I’ve been looking for a carriage to take.”

 

” I don’t need to leave?”

 

He was speechless for a long moment, but then he shook his head and said, “That’s right.”

 

“…”

 

“… Right.”

 

I replied dryly, “Okay.”

 

“…”

 

“Actually, I lied about having everything all packed.”

 

“…What?”

 

“Few people know you as well as I do, so how could I have misunderstood you?”

 

He gave me an incredulous stare, then let out a small sigh and muttered to himself.

 

“I don’t know.”

 

“But the way you said it was blunt.”

 

“…”

 

“Anyway, I didn’t mean to interrupt, I’m not trying to be a prude, I just… I’m a little bitter about something that happened in the past in my family.”

 

“…”

 

“That’s when I realized one thing…”

 

The music was winding down by now, and he was still watching me, I took a breath before speaking.

 

“I realized that trying to take it all on yourself makes you miserable.”

 

“…”

 

“Because I don’t want you to feel that way.”

 

I said, smiling weakly, “Share it with me sometimes.”

 

With those words, the song ended.

 

Rudrick and I stepped back and turned to each other. Thunderous applause erupted around us.

 

When I lifted my head and looked at him, he mouthed something.

 

‘You too.’

 

Why he said that I don’t know.

 

I didn’t bother to ask him again. It was a party tradition not to continue dancing with someone you’ve danced with before.

 

Naturally, people started to crowd around us, especially me and Rudrick.

 

Whether it was because it had been a long time since Bouser threw a party, or because it was Rudrick’s first party since becoming a Duke, everyone was trying to get a word in with the new Duke.

 

I found myself separated from him in the blink of an eye, and before I knew it, I was chatting with several nobles.

 

And when I had finally gotten away from the crowd and caught my breath. I heard a familiar voice from somewhere.

 

As if waiting, I turned around. 

 

“My Lady Dahlia.”

 

There was Lord River.

 

I’d been expecting this from the moment he’d said, ‘I’ll tell you later.’ But it was also true that my nerves were tense with unnecessary anxiety.

 

As if he sensed my nervousness, he smiled gently and offered me his hand.

 

“Would you like to dance?”

 

I swallowed dryly and took his hand, and he escorted me to the center of the natural thread.

 

‘Huh?’

 

At the same time, I was puzzled. I assumed it had to be a secret message, since he didn’t want anyone else around.

 

I thought we were going to a corner where there were fewer people, but we ended up in the middle of the most people.

 

‘I thought you had something else to tell me?’

 

But he remained silent, so I had no choice but to shake my head and follow his lead.

 

He was gentle, as was his nature, and as I leaned into him and stepped, I slowly began to focus on the dance.

 

He spoke out of the blue.

 

“…Didn’t you have anything else going on?”

 

What?

 

I questioned for a moment, but soon realized the answer. He must be referring to another unsavory incident, like the one just a few days ago.

 

“Other than that, nothing much happened.”

 

“I see. That’s really…”

 

“Glad to see I’m safe?”

 

“…”

 

“Why, what did you mean by that?”

 

He doesn’t answer my straightforward question. He just looked down as if he was thinking about something, and eventually uttered these words.

 

“I’m afraid I can’t go into details right now.”

 

“Well…”

 

“But when the time comes, I will tell you everything, and I hope you will…”

 

He paused, looking deeply troubled.

 

“You must be very careful.”

 

With those words, we spoke no more.

 

Or, more accurately, he was too busy watching me closely to speak at all, and I was watching him.

 

Lord River seemed overly wary of his surroundings. As if anything could happen at any moment.

 

From the look of it, I could see why he’d come to a crowded place. If someone was up to no good, they’d be more likely to come to a crowded place than a remote corner.

 

So who the hell would be up to no good? Who was he on guard against?

 

“Lord River.”

 

“…Yes, yes?”

 

“Did you find what you were looking for the other day?”

 

I asked, remembering what he’d said in passing just moments ago. But I didn’t catch it.

 

The look on his face was devastating.

 

His eyes were quivering, as if he’d been poked in the eye, and he was biting his lip and frowning as if he were trying to figure out what to do…

 

‘Why does he look like that?’

 

“That’s…”

 

But before he could finish his sentence, the door burst open.

 

A loud bang came from the door, and a knight burst into the party.

 

“Your Excellency!”

 

Instantly, all eyes in the room were on him, and after frantically looking around, he spotted Rudrick in the center of the room and rushed over to him.

 

He says something in a low voice to Rudrick, and at that moment I could see Rudrick’s face visibly stiffen, and I felt my heart sink.

 

Soon afterward, Rudrick follows the knight out of the party.

 

Several division commanders followed him, and finally, unable to overcome my anxiety, I grabbed someone who was hurrying to follow.

 

“Did something happen?”

 

It was Sir Ruth, whose face was as grave as Rudrick’s.

 

“Oh, well…”

 

He paused for a moment to consider something, and then as if he had made up his mind, he broke the unbelievable news to me.

 

“The former Duke has died.”