Author: Byuon

“What?”

Helios furrowed his eyebrows as if he did not understand what I meant.

I repeated the same words with a straight gaze.

“I want to be Escal’s mother.”

“What is that, no, wait a minute, Lena.”

Helios looked at me with a confused expression and rubbed his face roughly.

I thought it was too sudden, but when I think of Escal, it was best to settle this ambiguous relationship as soon as possible.

Helios, who had been pondering my words, asked with a firm face.

“You want to be Escal’s mother?”

“Yeah, ‘Real Mother’.”

“Hah…”

I knew he wouldn’t like it, but this was the only way.

Now I am legally Helios’ wife, but not Escal’s mother.

It was because Escal’s maternal grandfather, Marquis Melks, had custody of Escal, not me.

After Charlet Melks died, and while Helios searched for me, the Marquis turned Escal  to him.

In the name of needing a legal guardian to protect the child, he only took custody and didn’t take care of Escal.

His purpose was, of course, to have the child in his hands in case Escal became Duke of Anthemion.

The problem was that I had no custody, so there was no way to stop Helios from sending Escal to the academy or to the Marquis of Melks.

That’s what it meant to be a ‘Real Mother’.

Asking him to return the custody of Escal that the Marquis took.

Helios, who could not understand the meaning of those words, spoke in a suppressed voice.

“Don’t say nonsense.”

“I am your wife, and Escal is your son. It’s only natural for me to be Escal’s mother.”

“Lena.”

“And as a mother, I would never send Escal to the academy.”

I said, remembering the eyes of the child who begged me not to abandon him.

“Why are you doing this for a kid who has nothing to do with you?”

“Because the child is not at fault.”

The words that came out of my mouth hit the wall and came back to me.

That was what I wanted to say to Escal, and it was also what I desperately wanted to hear as a child.

It’s not my fault that I was born. That I have committed no sin.

“If you hate Escal because of me, then don’t do it.”

“……”

“I hate Charlet Melks, too. But Escal is innocent. You know how desperate he is to not be hated.”

“Stop it.”

“I know it’s not easy, Helios. Still, I want to protect Escal.”

“No matter what you say, you can’t. I won’t accept it.”

“……”

I thought it would be easy.

I thought he had changed his mind a bit with today’s outing.

But he didn’t change.

Helios still had no intention of embracing Escal, nor could he afford to look into the child’s wounds.

If compromise is impossible, there is only one solution.

“Okay, then I will leave.”

“What?”

“If it bothers you so much to see Escal, then I will take Escal and leave.”

I made a decisive declaration, passed Helios, who stood blankly, and took out my luggage.

Helios had everything prepared, so the luggage I brought when I came here had not been unpacked.

I left the room with my empty luggage.

“Mary! Go wake up Escal and wait for the carriage.”

“Madam? Where are you going all of a sudden?”

“I’ll talk as we go, so bring Escal. Bring your luggage.”

“Are you going to pack your bags? What the hell are you doing?”

Mary asked dumbly at the sudden command.

Hah, it’s frustrating.

I headed straight to the child’s room to wake Escal.

“Lena!”

At that moment, Helios, who woke up late, rushed out and grabbed my wrist.

“Let go of this.”

“No. You can never go.”

“Then will you listen to me?”

“…….”

Helios didn’t answer this time either. I hardened my face and spoke sternly.

“Look at this. I have nothing more to say to you.”

I shook his hand coldly. The ring he put on my finger fell off.

The round ring rolled down the floor and stopped at his feet.

Helios picked up the ring with his wounded eyes.

“Lena….”

“I’m sorry, Helios. It ends here.”

I spoke coldly and turned around.

If I’m this tough, Helios is inevitably moving forward, hoping that he will return Escal’s custody to me.

Bang

A loud sound hit my ears.

“Master!”

“……?!”

Helios just lost consciousness and collapsed.

 

  ****

 

It was a stormy time.

From the moment Helios fell until the doctor arrived, I couldn’t remember exactly what had happened.

I only vaguely remembered that Merlin embraced the fallen Helios and moved him to the room to soothe my crying.

Shortly after putting Helios on the bed, his fever started to rise.

Not knowing what to do, only the doctor rushed to see him moaning and suffering.

The doctor who looked at him carefully opened his mouth.

“He seems to have a terrible body ache.”

“His body?”

“Yes. Has he been overworked lately?”

“Overwork…”

He always doing it.

After marrying me, it was common to stay up all night in his office to avoid being blamed.

… Still, if it hurts enough to fall, he should have told me.

I couldn’t even lift my head at the fact that I was stuck with him every day and didn’t even know that he was in pain.

The doctor, who found the arm that had been bruised, frowned.

“How did he hurt his arm?”

“Ah, that… he bumped into someone we didn’t know.”

“It looks like the bone has cracked because of the swelling around it. I’ll put a bandage on him, so try to avoid any drastic movements until the bones heal.”

“I will.”

The pain would have been severe if the bones had been cracked, but he must have endured it for fear I’ll be worried.

My heart ached at the thought of the man who said he was okay with an innocent face.

A carefully bandaged doctor stood up with a medical bag.

“The treatment is over. I will make the medicine tomorrow morning and send it to you.”

“Thank you for your effort.”

After I got everyone out, I dragged a chair by the bed and sat down.

A cold sweat was forming on his hot face.

I wet a lukewarm towel and gently wiped his face.

As I carefully wiped his body away from the wound, the ring fell from his clenched fist.

In the meantime, you were holding this.

My heart throbbed with sadness and regret.

“… No, Lena….”

A familiar name slipped out between dry lips.

“… I’m sorry, it’s all my fault.”

Knowing how deep the trauma of losing Lenia to Helios was, I was only ahead of myself, hurting him that I should not have given.

“I’m sorry, Helios…”

I buried my face in Helios’ palm and swallowed my tears.

 

  ****

 

I guess I just fell asleep.

When I woke up, it was midnight, and I was on the bed.

Contrary to before I fell asleep, Helios, who was sitting on the chair, was looking down at me.

Recalling the situation before I went to bed, I jumped up.

“Are you okay? Can you get up?”

“……”

Helios didn’t answer.

The room was pitch black without a single candle lit and it was impossible to see his face.

So I was scared.

I don’t know what expression he’s looking at me.

I couldn’t tell if the emotion on his face was hatred, anger, or sadness.

“Helios….”

“Let’s do what you say.”

In the darkness, a poorly cracked voice could be heard.

“I will cancel sending Escal to the academy.”

“…….”

“I’ll bring you custody too.”

This man is losing to me again.

“Please don’t just say you’re leaving.”

The moon that had been obscured by the clouds appeared. Then I could see his expression.

Was he like this on the day Lenia disappeared?

Even the bright moonlight could not completely erase the terrible despair.

I put my hand down, unable to wipe his tears away.

“I will never do that again.”

“…….”

“I’m not going anywhere until you leave me.”

“…….”

“So… Please forgive me too.”

I hugged him as hard as I could.

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Byuon

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Comments (7)

  1. Don’t you just love it when the angst only lasts one or two chapters?

  2. This chap makes me hate the dead father and the DED B*tch more😭😭😭😭

  3. Hopefully he can learn to love Escal and lead a happy life with Lena and his son forever