I’m Just a Counselor – Chapter 122

Author: Dakku-san

After Estella left for the academy, Jeremiah seemed a little down. Without the person who had always been by his side, he felt a sense of emptiness and lethargy.

Moreover, now there was truly no family left in the ducal estate. No matter how much he considered the people of the estate as his family, it wasn’t the same as having his real family.

“Could you stay by my side for just a little while longer?”

Jeremiah’s words somehow sounded like a plea, and my resolve softened.

I couldn’t bring myself to refuse him. Thus, my routine shifted back to residing in the ducal estate, just like before.

At first, Jeremiah seemed content with just that, but soon, he began to want more.

“I can’t sleep. Vanessa, I think I need you here like before.”

A few days later, he clung to me and made his appeal.

His earnest expression weakened my resolve again, and I had no choice but to enter his bedroom with him for the first time in a long while.

Jeremiah’s bedroom was filled with a faint, soothing woody fragrance. The flickering flames in the fireplace warmed the air.

I checked the time. It was almost midnight, but Jeremiah still showed no sign of closing his eyes.

Eventually, I rose from the chair.

“Shall I read something?”

Just like the first time I had entered his bedroom, I moved toward the massive bookshelf. But Jeremiah caught my arm.

“I told you before.”

“…?”

“I can’t fall asleep with just a fairy tale you read to me anymore.”

Jeremiah whispered softly and pulled my arm. I stumbled with a soft “Oh—” before being dragged along by his force.

My unbalanced body fell gently onto the bed. Staring up at the ceiling in an instant, I blinked. ‘What in the world…?’

“Shane said he watches you until you fall asleep in bed. But you never lie down in front of me, do you? So, let’s try lying down together and falling asleep.”

“Was this your plan from the beginning?”

“You’re making it sound like I’ve become some kind of scoundrel, Vanessa.”

Jeremiah let out a soft sigh and rolled over. This time, instead of the ceiling, my vision was filled with his face. I narrowed my eyes.

The firelight from the hearth flowed through his silver hair, casting a crimson glow. He deliberately furrowed his brows playfully.

“I haven’t even tried what I really want to do yet.”

Then, as if throwing a tantrum, he tilted his head and added, “So I’ll do it now.”

‘So, he planned this from the start?’

Was even that earnest expression an act? For a moment, I was at a loss for words.

‘Jeremiah, you’re really learning how to use your face to your advantage.’

Or maybe he’s just figuring out what I’m weak to.

As I mused and glanced at him, Jeremiah’s hand slid softly down my arm, his fingers intertwining with mine.

I couldn’t help but tense up. His lips were tender and warm, but I knew things would get dangerous if we went further.

There was no mistaking what this atmosphere was implying.

“But it’s true that I can’t sleep, Vanessa.”

“…”

“And it’s also true that you’re the only cure for my insomnia.”

He grumbled with a hint of grievance, as if worried I’d misunderstand that this was all a ploy. Then he kissed me again—gently, as if coaxing me to relax.

‘But how am I supposed to relax?’

I was lying next to the man I loved, and that man was unbelievably handsome. And now he was kissing me.

I swallowed a dry laugh.

‘At this rate, I might end up pouncing on Jeremiah first.’

While I was desperately trying to keep my composure, Jeremiah slowly pulled away from the kiss and let his head drop with a soft thud.

He didn’t seem intent on pushing me further. Just holding my hand and embracing me like this seemed to be enough for him.

Feeling silly for jumping to such thoughts, I pressed my fingers to my temples.

“Maybe I wish I were truly shameless enough to do everything I want with you.”

Come to think of it, he had once told me he was done pretending to be elegant. Yet, despite that, Jeremiah remained an exceedingly noble and graceful man—never once behaving in a truly ungentlemanly way.

“What is it you want to do?”

“Hmm. Lock you up in the estate so only I can see you?”

I couldn’t help but laugh. For Jeremiah, that would be an easy task. Keeping someone confined, preventing them from going anywhere or meeting anyone—it was nothing for him.

But even as he said he wanted it, he never acted on it. He only grumbled that I allowed others what I wouldn’t allow him.

“Are you still feeling uneasy?”

I shifted slightly before wrapping my arms around his waist.

The bed was plenty spacious, but if Jeremiah couldn’t sleep because of loneliness, then I had no choice but to fill that void. So, he could rest peacefully.

I wanted to watch over his nights. I hoped our shared warmth would be enough.

“I’m fine now. As long as you don’t pull away from me. As long as you don’t turn your back on me behind some self-imposed line.”

“…”

“Instead of solving everything alone, give me the chance to stand by your side.”

Jeremiah spoke softly; his words deliberate.

“Sometimes, I think I might have been like the king in the fairy tale.”

“The king?”

“The one who locked the princess in a tower because he feared her icy heart would melt. I, too, tried to keep Estella confined within the ducal estate, under my shadow, because I was afraid, she’d get hurt.”

“…”

“But I realized that wasn’t the answer. The wanderer might have been important not just to the princess, but to the king as well. He changed the king, who had lived only in his own thoughts. He let the king see those beautiful flowers.”

A memory surfaced—something I’d once heard in a bookstore. “As long as the story continues, the roles we play can always change.”

And it was true.

Estella had transformed from the fragile flower of a romance novel into a bold adventurer forging her own path. Julian had shifted from a self-conscious tsundere to a crown prince earnestly contemplating how to become a good emperor.

All of this happened because this world—this story—was still unfolding.

‘Maybe I was the one most aware that this world was inside a novel.’

I was the one most bound by their original roles, the one who thought everything was predetermined.

I stared deeply into Jeremiah’s shimmering eyes.

The heroine’s brother-complex older brother—the man who was supposed to pour all his blind affection solely onto his sister—was now showering that love onto me.

“Thank you for being my spring, Vanessa.”

Perhaps the reason I once felt so inadequate was because of that. Unlike him, who had been given a clear role as the heroine’s brother, I was just an extra without any proper part to play. Maybe that was why I thought I couldn’t stand by his side.

But not anymore. Jeremiah had given me a role.

In the face of his love, my role was changing too. Because the story wasn’t over yet.

“You asked me before—whether I loved you as much as you loved me…”

“Ah…”

“Do you love me?”

Once again, I asked him, as if seeking confirmation. Jeremiah smiled brightly. His voice, as always, held not even a hint of hesitation.

“Yes. I love you.”

“…”

“You didn’t answer me last time, either.”

Back then, and even now, Jeremiah never pressed me for an answer. As if to say, “Say it when you’re ready.”

It was undeniably unfair for him to declare his love one-sidedly, yet he never asked whether I loved him. And that only made me want to say it more.

“They say that wanting someone to sleep well is a sign of love.”