Kill Your X Chapter 35

He darted his eyes around nervously when I stared at him. His awkward smile looked pathetic compared to the past.

“I thought you were dead.”

I was glad my first words after our reunion weren’t shaky. Ma Yubin watched us from the side like we were monkeys in a zoo.

“Kim Minseok.”

There he was, my other nemesis and first love who appeared after almost ten years, the one who instilled in me a terrible perspective on relationships.

I sometimes imagined it. What if we met again someday? Even though he ran off with my money, he was someone I once loved passionately.

I thought it might be unexpectedly touching, but when it actually happened, it was just funny. Was it because I witnessed him casually making out with someone else? Neither a welcoming smile nor a tearful outburst came.

“Hyung…”

“Kim Minseok? Who’s that?”

Ma Yubin suddenly cut in from the side. My gaze naturally shifted to him at the unexpected question.

“Si Yeonho, you used that alias too? Couldn’t you have been more creative? Kim Minseok? It’s such a common name.”

“Wait, what did you just say?”

“Ah, were you asking me?”

Ma Yubin asked back. The culprit of this situation, my ex-boyfriend, just looked screwed and whispered to Ma Yubin. He wasn’t a good singer, but he had a loud voice, so I heard everything.

“What’s going on? You called Gyujin-hyung?”

“Yeah. I called him before you came here. What’s the problem? I’m curious. Who is this person who dated you in the past and is now dating Seo Seunghan?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Who are you calling Si Yeonho?”

As I raised my voice, Kim Minseok, who had been looking back and forth between me and Ma Yubin, jumped up and darted out of the room.

“Hyung, I’m sorry! I’ll explain everything later!”

Does he run away whenever a difficult situation arises? I was dumbfounded by his consistently irresponsible attitude, then and now.

As the brief commotion subsided, the manager quietly closed the door. Was this why he couldn’t tell me outright during our call? In any case, it seemed Ma Yubin was receiving special treatment because he was a top celebrity.

“This is a mess, isn’t it?”

He smiled, swirling his glass in his hand. His attire, with several buttons undone, revealing his chest, looked as natural as a movie costume.

“I’m really sorry for using the room without permission. But what could I do? I went through all the trouble of coming here to avoid people, and they said there weren’t any official rooms left.”

His sickeningly sweet tone grated on my nerves.

“Our Seunghan really lacks sense. If he bought such a nice club, he should naturally set aside a few rooms for internal use. But he only takes care of his own lover? He does that even though he knows better than anyone that I need this kind of space.”

Ma Yubin presumptuously concluded that Seunghan would understand if he heard the story. My frown deepened. When my suspicion exceeded a certain level, my thoughts couldn’t flow straight.

“Who is Seunghan?”

My voice trembled slightly as I asked back.

“Hmm?”

Ma Yubin looked straight at me. As expected of an actor, various emotions flickered in his eyes. He grinned, misinterpreting my bewildered expression.

“Who else? Your lover.”

“The person I’m dating is named Si Yeonho.”

“I heard you weren’t that serious and that you broke up a long time ago. What’s this? You don’t seem like the type to cling on pathetically.”

As I just frowned, Ma Yubin spoke casually, as if checking the setting of a scenario.

“Let’s get this straight. Seunghan told you his name was Si Yeonho, really?”

Come to think of it, he had never directly introduced himself as Si Yeonho. When we reunited, I naturally remembered him as Si Yeonho and called him that, and he naturally responded.

No, was it really natural? I recalled our first and second meetings. The image of him not responding immediately to the name I called him suddenly came to mind. I just thought he was slow to react back then.

“Wow, judging by your reaction, you really seem to have gotten it wrong. Working in the entertainment industry, Seunghan has become quite the actor, hasn’t he?”

“So, what Ma Yubin-ssi is saying is…”

I took a deep breath, trying to steady my erratic breathing. I parted my dry lips and managed to speak with difficulty. Uttering those words drained all my energy.

“The real name of the person I met isn’t Si Yeonho?”

“No. His name is Seo Seunghan. The person I was with until a moment ago is Si Yeonho.”

“Then the person who’s the managing director of KNT Entertainment is also…”

“That is Si Yeonho. I heard Seo Seunghan has been acting as his stand-in for several years.”

It was a mutual agreement, but it seems like you got caught up in it somehow?

At one point he was a dead man, and now even his name wasn’t his own. Was this a misunderstanding again? If I cautiously brought it up, would Si Yeonho just laugh and refute me again, like last time?

At this point, I didn’t know whose words to believe. As I was confused, knock, knock, someone knocked on the door.

“Come in.”

Ma Yubin answered naturally as if he were the original owner of the room. Soon, another employee poked his head through the opened door.

“Actor-nim, the party preparations are complete.”

“Okay, I’m coming.”

Ma Yubin got up and adjusted his clothes. Seeing his straightened back, I wondered if his drunken slouching from a moment ago was all an act.

“There must be a reason.”

“Yes?”

“You know, don’t you? Seunghan, he may lack flexibility, but he’s not a bad person to the core. I might have lowered my standards because I’ve been in this business for too long, though.”

Ma Yubin added that he was a pitiful guy if you knew him. Just listening to him, it sounded like he knew Si Yeonho better than I did.

He lightly wrapped an arm around my shoulder and spoke to me in a friendly manner before leaving the room.

“There’s a party starting soon in the private lounge. Normally, only people I invite can enter, but I’ll make a special exception for you, Gyujin-ssi. How about it?”

Disgusted by his uninvited touch, I roughly brushed his arm away. Ma Yubin feigned surprise with an exaggerated expression. His pretense couldn’t hide the condescending attitude I could clearly see, and it offended me.

“Haha. I think I understand why Seunghan liked you. You’re so cute.”

“Ma Yubin-ssi.”

“Don’t be so harsh. Whatever the real reason, in the end, haven’t I helped you? If you hadn’t come here today, Gyujin-ssi would’ve never known your lover’s real name.”

Ma Yubin slipped a card into my shirt’s breast pocket.

“Thanks for letting me use the room today. If you’re curious about Seo Seunghan, call the number on that. I can give you more reliable information than the person you mistakenly know as Kim Minseok.”

After fixing his hair one last time, Ma Yubin left. His confident demeanor was every bit that of a top star leaving the waiting room.

As I stood there dumbfounded, Ma Yubin spoke without looking back.

“Gyujin-ssi, the party invitation is still valid! Show them the card I gave you, and they’ll let you in. But if you come, keep it a secret from Seunghan. He hates it when I throw parties.”

He wants the celebrities he manages to stay home and watch TV?

The chuckles that followed sounded insincere.

I found an unopened bottle of alcohol on the table and poured it straight into my mouth. The manager, who had stealthily reappeared, fidgeted beside me.

“Mr. Gyujin, are you alright?”

“Manager-nim.”

I slammed the bottle down. I didn’t want to vent my anger like this, but I felt like my head would explode if I didn’t express my boiling emotions.

“Who’s the owner of this place, anyway?”

“Yes?”

“Si Yeonho? Seo Seunghan?”

I didn’t know where things went wrong. If the whole world wasn’t conspiring to mock me, then what the fuck was this?

“Or is there another name I’ve gotten wrong? Huh?”

How dare he talk about love while hiding his identity? The presence of him, which had felt so tender just a few hours ago, now felt despicable. I wet my throat with another gulp of strong alcohol and stormed out.

The club was less crowded than before, as the people presumed to be celebrities had all moved to the private lounge. While looking around for my target, I spotted a familiar face.

“Hi. Long time no see.”

“Oh my god, Song Gyujin?”

The man sitting at the bar table turned around in surprise when I spoke to him. I hid my burning insides and put on a bright smile.

“I never thought we’d be talking again. You know the rumors…”

“You mean the rumors about me dating the owner of this place?”

He nodded awkwardly. If I remember correctly, this was the guy I slept with around last autumn. I remember our compatibility being so-so.

“We broke up.”

“Already?”

“Dating doesn’t really suit me.”

As I sat next to him, my phone vibrated. I didn’t check, but I figured it was Si Yeonho.

No, it’s not even Si Yeonho anymore.

That thought sparked a wicked impulse. Even if it meant being self-destructive, I wanted to break the chain of bad fate. Before that, I wanted him to feel this shitty feeling I was experiencing, at least once.

The feeling of burning rage behind my eyes. The pain of having my heart ripped to shreds and thrown into the marketplace.