Kill Your X Chapter 6

“Don’t shower for a week before meeting that person.”

The first sentence was already a high hurdle.

“Smack your lips while eating and show everything in your mouth. Instead of washing clothes, wear them as is, shower in them, and let them dry on you.”

“Ugh, no way. That’s insane.”

Isn’t that just giving up on being human? I shuddered, and Hyun Jin smirked as if they’d expected my reaction.

“See? For someone proper like you, sunbae, asking to borrow money is probably the worst you can do. Being a jerk takes practice, but you’ve probably lived your whole life speaking politely and uprightly.”

Not exactly, but there’s no need to bare my soul to someone I don’t plan on getting closer to.

“Alright, I’ll try it next time we meet.”

“You’ve already set up the next meeting?”

“Not yet, but it’ll happen soon. You said it yourself—pyramid schemes are nothing if not persistent.”

Hyun Jin went on with boundary-crossing remarks: Tell me if you need help, or I’ll stay at your place for a while, eat and sleep there, and play bodyguard. I put up with it for a bit, but when I whipped off my glasses, they finally shut down their sales pitch for the day.

“You know what? I fell for you because of that scowl you’re making right now.”

The furrow between my brows deepened. I just wanted to quietly go about my work life, barely noticeable. Should I just flip everything upside down? Most days it’s fine, but living with my personality suppressed sometimes feels overwhelming.

“The moment a refined person gets prickly is so hot—oh, sorry! Sorry! See you tomorrow, sunbae!”

Hyun Jin bolted before I could scold them. It was a wise choice for self-preservation.

After an exhausting conversation with little to show for it, I resolved to actually ask for money. I really didn’t want to, but no better ideas came to mind.

If it’s not about sex, I don’t know what Si Yeonho wants from a partner. At the very least, a lover who asks to borrow money at what’s supposed to be a first date probably isn’t it.

But Si Yeonho seemed pretty wealthy…

Coming from a well-off family myself, I could tell. He didn’t flaunt logos, but both times we met, Si Yeonho was draped in expensive clothes. They looked understated, but the car he drove last time was worth hundreds of millions of won.

What’s his job, exactly? Is he really with an entertainment agency? I didn’t even ask.

What he’s been doing for the past ten years, which university he attended, where he lives now—none of the usual catch-up talk you’d expect from a long-lost acquaintance happened during our last meeting. Just a bunch of pointless chatter.

Now that we’re dating, I can learn his personal details over time, but there’s one problem. I don’t have Si Yeonho’s phone number. I boldly accepted his confession, then ditched his offer to drive me home and fled the café. It was freezing, and I struggled to find a taxi.

How am I supposed to set up the next meeting?

I need to ask for that money soon. I’m not a guard dog waiting for him to reach out first.

For days after we agreed to date, I was on edge, worried he’d show up unannounced at school like last time. But my fears didn’t materialize. One day, two days, three days, a week passed.

The anxiety that had taken hold slowly gave way to other emotions. Irritation, humiliation, indignation. All sorts of draining feelings competed to grow inside me.

Am I being ghosted again? This time, just one day into dating?

Even in my monotonous routine, bursts of anger would flare up. If I’ve faced the same ending twice in relationships, maybe I’m the problem. I know it’s paranoid thinking, but otherwise, why do these shitty things keep happening to me?

I hated it, but every night in bed, Si Yeonho filled my thoughts. Mostly his current self, but sometimes a hazy high school version slipped in.

The more I thought about him, the clearer his image seemed to become. Yet key memories remained patchy, sliced apart unnaturally, as if someone had forcibly carved them out.

What am I obsessing over? If it’s not worth remembering, it must mean nothing significant happened between us.

Just when I was getting mad at myself for thinking about Si Yeonho so much, he appeared before me again. In an unexpected place, in a completely unforeseen way.

✽✽✽

I visited a different bar for the first time in years. It used to feel like a second home, but I’d drifted away after finding another spot I liked better. Maybe I subconsciously avoided it because it’s where I met the worst connection of my life.

With nowhere else to go, I wandered back here. Unlike Jerome’s, it’s not members-only, so the crowd’s a mixed bag, but if you stick around, you can meet some decent people.

Time to forget the guy who spewed nonsense and vanished. Since the weirdo’s gone, tonight’s for raising a glass. I’ll wet my throat with booze, find a partner who fits my taste, and…

“Whoa, you scared me.”

As I was about to enter, I spotted a familiar figure by the entrance. A man blending into the shadows opened his eyes slowly upon seeing me. Dressed head-to-toe in black, he looked as gloomy as ever.

“Si Yeonho.”

I steadied my racing heart and stood before him. Having to tilt my head up to meet his eyes pissed me off. To think I’d run into the guy who disappeared without a word after we agreed to date—here of all places.

“Did you follow me?”

“Do you want a pleasant answer?”

Si Yeonho sidestepped my question, as if ready to weave a sweet lie if I asked for it.

“I want the truth.”

“I followed you.”

Why bother with that phrasing if he’s just going to admit it? As I stared at him, dumbfounded, Si Yeonho peeled himself off the wall. That simple motion was as graceful as a sated predator stretching.

“I missed you, sunbae.”

While I stayed silent, at least five people passed through the entrance. Unable to bear the curious glances from strangers, I responded.

“Liar.”

“You think I’m lying?”

“Someone who misses me ghosts for over a week? Begging on your knees for me to accept your confession was what, a joke? If you’re gonna pull this, why’d you show up again?”

Feeling wronged, I exaggerated—a tiny bit. I did lose sleep over it for days.

I expected him to at least say “That’s not true,” but Si Yeonho didn’t bother correcting me. It felt like he was indirectly calling me petty, which doubled my irritation.

“Were you waiting for me?”

“No.”

I waited. Your face haunted me constantly, driving me crazy. I spent nights exhausted, racking my brain for what I might’ve done wrong.

“Why’re you smiling? I said I didn’t wait.”

My pride stung, but Si Yeonho subtly raised the corners of his mouth. He offered an empty excuse like it was charity.

“Sorry. I had some urgent business to handle.”

“How about you just keep handling that important business? If you’re busy enough to ditch your boyfriend the day after we start dating, your life must be pretty packed.”

At least I had an excuse now. A reason to push away a neglectful partner.

“I’ll cut back on work.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“I’ll halve it.”

“Yeonho.”

“Quarter it? I can’t drop it entirely—things are too complicated to walk away right now.”

Is this obedience or extremism? Like last time, Si Yeonho seemed less resolute than he looked. It was surprising, given his appearance