Actually, It’s a Messy Melodrama Chapter 6

“This is maddening.”

Taejun muttered, burying his face in his hands. It was truly maddening. Repeating the meaningless nightmares, knowing he was becoming worn out and broken, yet unable to escape this hell, desperately struggling only to repeat the regression again and again—it was all, all of it tiresome. If he could, he wanted to end everything.

At that moment, a voice drifted to Taejun’s ears like the wind.

‘Please save me.’

Again. It was Cha Haeshin’s voice again. If he were to compare the intensity, the sight of him bleeding to death before his eyes should have been far more intense, yet strangely, Han Taejun kept recalling Cha Haeshin’s voice, pathetically clinging to him, begging to be saved.

Taejun finally lifted his head and got up, heading to the bathroom. He splashed cold water on his face several times, and the sticky feeling of melancholy that had been consuming him gradually lifted.

In all likelihood, Cha Haeshin would be nothing. All the hopes Taejun had found so far ended in vain delusions, and they only dragged him deeper into the swamp of despair.

So, what would be different about Cha Haeshin? Could Han Taejun, who couldn’t even save his own life, really save someone else’s? In the end, Cha Haeshin would also be just a rotten lifeline, and Taejun, trying to climb up that rope, would surely fall into a deeper abyss.

“…”

He felt ridiculous and pathetic for regarding Cha Haeshin’s voice as a lighthouse in the dark sea, even though he knew that.

Taejun couldn’t fall asleep easily until dawn.

☂️

“Ah…”

Haeshin opened his eyes with a terrible pain. He saw the familiar ceiling. Did he fall asleep? Faint? Or had he died again? His vision was blurry, and his thoughts were jumbled.

In his dream, Haeshin was being beaten by his alcoholic father. He had grabbed his trashy father’s leg as he went to hit his mother, and then he was kicked. When he came to, Jin Youngmin was thrusting between his legs.

I love you, Haeshin, I love you.

The cursed voice oozed into his ears like pus. But was it really a dream? Or reality? What was the difference between nightmare and reality?

“Ugh…”

Half out of his mind, drifting somewhere between dream and reality, Haeshin snapped to his senses at the stinging pain in his throat. He coughed slightly and checked the calendar. Fortunately or unfortunately, it wasn’t a new loop. Only then did yesterday’s memories begin to surface one by one.

“Oh, I’m dying…”

Haeshin, his eyes finally focusing, groaned. His voice was hoarse. He didn’t know if it was from Jin Youngmin choking him or if his throat was injured from Jin Youngmin shoving his cock down his throat. Either way, it was a shitty situation.

“Why did he suddenly ask me to dinner…?”

But shitty things weren’t particularly special in Haeshin’s life. There was something more important right now. The reason Jin Youngmin had gone crazy was because Han Taejun had asked Haeshin to dinner. Haeshin still couldn’t understand that part.

“This is so frustrating…”

Haeshin, frustrated that he couldn’t get the answers he wanted just by sitting still, drooped his eyes. If the regression had taken him further into the past, he could have gone out for a while, or at least used his phone.

At this point, with only a month left until his death, there was no way to contact the outside world, let alone go out. It would be great if Jin Youngmin actually took him out to dinner with Han Taejun, but that was even more unlikely. He had already suspected a relationship between Han Taejun and Cha Haeshin once, so he would never let them meet.

In dramas, chaebol heirs always appeared like princes on white horses. Haeshin chuckled, entertaining the silly thought.

“Well, even then, they only save the people they love.”

There was no prince in fairy tales, let alone reality, who would come riding to rescue a lowlife he barely knew, much less loved. It was more realistic to hope Jin Youngmin would just kill him quickly.

“Haeshin, are you awake…?”

Just then, the bedroom door opened, and Jin Youngmin entered, looking dejected. Haeshin felt a sudden chill run down his spine but didn’t show it. That much was a piece of cake now.

“Yes, I’m awake.”

Haeshin nodded slightly, and Jin Youngmin, as if he had never rampaged like a madman, carefully climbed onto the bed and cupped Haeshin’s cheeks.

“Are you okay…? Does it hurt…?”

Jin Youngmin asked. Would you be okay if you were me? Even though those words rose to the tip of his tongue, Haeshin, like the clever regressor he was, shook his head.

“No, I’m fine. I can bear it…”

But he couldn’t appear truly fine. Even though Jin Youngmin was a hopeless crazy, perverted, psychopathic, delusional husband, he still had feelings for Haeshin.

“You’re bruised…”

Youngmin muttered gloomily after checking Haeshin’s neck. But Haeshin knew the madness flashing beneath that voice. While feeling sorry for Haeshin’s injuries, he would also be satisfied with the marks he had made himself.

Youngmin soon lay down close to Haeshin and hugged his waist tightly.

“So why did you make me so upset…?”

“…”

“You’re mine, and it hurt me so much that Han Taejun suddenly said he wanted to meet you.”

“…I’m sorry.”

Haeshin didn’t mind apologizing for Jin Youngmin’s nonsense. He had thrown away his pride even before meeting Jin Youngmin. Growing up under a father who kicked him daily, demanding alcohol and money, Cha Haeshin had lived solely for survival.

“You won’t do that again, will you? You won’t even look at anyone else, will you?”

“Of course not. Who else would I look at besides you? I only have you.”

Haeshin dutifully stroked Youngmin’s back as he pressed his large body against him, recalling Han Taejun who had looked at the bruises on his wrists with surprise. If he clung to him again, would he come looking for him again?

“I’m sorry I hurt you. Haeshin… Shall we go out for dinner tomorrow?”

It was at that moment that Haeshin’s eyes lit up. It was so unexpected that his heart almost jumped out of his mouth.

Going out? Jin Youngmin voluntarily suggesting going out? At this point, it was something he couldn’t even dream of. He seemed to have come to his senses and realized that the violence this time had been excessively forced, even by his own standards.

Even though Jin Youngmin usually overcompensated with kindness after excessive violence, this wasn’t common. It was rewarding that he had been obedient until he was beaten.

He thought there would be nothing he could change since he had only returned to a month ago, but Han Taejun had unexpectedly suggested dinner, and Jin Youngmin had suggested going out. Although the dinner with Han Taejun had fallen through, being able to go out at this point was like a dream.

While wondering if this was actually a nightmare, Haeshin forced himself to answer calmly.

“I like being at home, just the two of us.”

He didn’t know the answer to escaping this hell, but he knew exactly what the right answer was for Jin Youngmin. Although he couldn’t see his expression because Youngmin had buried his face in his chest, Haeshin could feel him smiling.

“No. It’s been a long time since we went out. Let’s have dinner somewhere nice and stay at a hotel.”

“Um, okay, then. I’ll do whatever you want.”

Haeshin answered, trying to suppress his excitement. He couldn’t relax just because Jin Youngmin had suggested it first. He was fickle and could change his mind at any moment.

Honestly, he didn’t expect this one outing to be a breakthrough. There would be a limit to what he could do even if he went out. But Haeshin was glad that there was even a small variable. It was even more encouraging that it stemmed from Han Taejun.

Moreover, if he properly got on Youngmin’s nerves during this outing offered out of ‘goodwill’, he might be able to end this loop a little earlier. Either way, there was nothing to lose for Haeshin.

Haeshin didn’t indulge in such complacent thoughts about how broken a life waiting for death was. The important thing was to survive to the very end. He still planned to struggle to survive in this hell. Just as he always had.

☂️

“He made a hotel reservation?”

Secretary Choi bowed his head and answered Taejun’s question.

“Yes. He made a reservation for two under Jin Youngmin’s name for 7 p.m. tomorrow.”

“So he’s not completely confining him.”

“Excuse me?”

“It’s nothing. You can go now.”

After dismissing his secretary, Taejun leaned back in his chair. Honestly, he was a little surprised. He hadn’t expected Jin Youngmin and Cha Haeshin to be the type to have a cozy dinner date.

Could it be that the situation was different from the last loop? Had nothing happened in this loop to make Cha Haeshin beg to be saved? That meant Cha Haeshin was safe in his original life as well.

Then, some choice Taejun made in the last loop must have affected Haeshin’s life, but he had no clue what it could be.

“No, no…”

Taejun shook his head. He couldn’t be certain yet.

The two of them at his grandfather’s birthday party hadn’t seemed to have any particular problems on the surface. Despite the sharp gazes around them, Youngmin had been attentive to Cha Haeshin at the event. He looked like a devoted husband to anyone watching.

However, on that day, Haeshin had begged Han Taejun to save him and ultimately died at Jin Youngmin’s hands. There was no guarantee it wouldn’t happen again.

“Secretary Choi.”

—Yes, CEO.

Taejun immediately connected to Secretary Choi’s line and gave his instructions.

“Make two separate reservations at the same place, same time.”

In the end, he had no choice but to move himself to properly check things out.