Actually, It’s a Messy Melodrama Chapter 86

Taejun was certain of his own feelings, but that didn’t mean he could rashly confess his love. He didn’t even want to.

Jin Youngmin, who had approached under the pretense of helping Cha Haeshin, had bound and tormented Haeshin precisely in the name of that “love,” ultimately pushing him toward death.

If Taejun were to help him while citing love as the reason, when Haeshin was not yet emotionally ready, Haeshin would feel pressured. That very pressure could become a trigger for his trauma. It was a situation Taejun absolutely did not want.

He could approach slowly. He was fully prepared to wait as long as it took. After all, the two of them had time that not even death could separate. Taejun planned to carefully open Haeshin’s heart and make every effort so that Haeshin could willingly accept his love.

When that day came, Cha Haeshin would surely realize that love was not something to fear.

Thinking of that someday-to-come day, Taejun gently brushed aside the disheveled strands of hair falling over Haeshin’s forehead. His fingertips, his heart, the pit of his stomach, all of it tickled intensely.

Only then did Haeshin exhale the breath he had been holding and slightly open his eyes. Taejun’s face, showing not the slightest hint of mocking or pity, came into view, gentle and kind.

“If you have a nightmare and wake up, make sure to wake me.”

It was truly the soft voice one would use with a lover. Haeshin blinked blankly. Even though they weren’t real lovers and were only pretending to be, Taejun showed such tender affection that Haeshin liked it.

Yes. Haeshin liked Han Taejun. He didn’t know exactly what shade that “liking” carried, but Haeshin simply liked Han Taejun, and every day he liked him more. To the point where he worried whether it was okay to like someone this recklessly.

“…Yes. You too, Mr. President. Absolutely.”

Haeshin pressed down hard on all his fluttering, difficult, complicated, and even worrisome feelings as he answered.

It felt miraculous that he, who had once been so consumed with mere survival that he couldn’t look at anything else, was now feeling such varied emotions.

So in a way, it was only natural that Cha Haeshin liked Han Taejun. If anyone met a person who willingly jumped into the mud with them to save their life that had been rolling in the mire, who could help but revere that person?

“Yeah.”

Taejun answered in a refreshed voice, naturally turned off the light, and lay down on the bed. In the bedroom that darkened in an instant, Haeshin slowly chewed over the conversation they had just shared.

A safe space no one could invade, a person who could protect him from any threat, a world where he would never have to be alone again, it was all right here.

Haeshin had stood alone on the battlefield for a very long time, clad in armor. Because he had never been properly protected in any home, the armor had become indistinguishable from his own body; he no longer even realized he was wearing it.

But here, beside Han Taejun, Haeshin, who had even removed the minimal shield protecting himself, felt complete rest for the first time in his life.

Sleep came rushing in as if he had never once curled up or tensed his body. Feeling the unfamiliar desire that if Taejun was okay with it, he wanted to fall asleep here tomorrow and the day after too, Haeshin slowly slipped into peaceful slumber.

☂️

“Jungho.”

“Yes, Mr. President.”

“I want to buy some clothes.”

“Ah, yes. I’ll prepare right away. Will you go directly to the room, or would you like to view them at home?”

Secretary Choi answered familiarly while checking Taejun’s schedule. Come to think of it, it had been quite a while since Taejun last went shopping. He had never been particularly interested in such things.

“At home.”

“It’s unusual for you to suddenly want to buy clothes.”

Secretary Choi spoke with a smile in his voice. He couldn’t help thinking it was probably because of Mr. Cha Haeshin. Even the great Han Taejun was going shopping for clothes, something he had never cared about in his life, just to look good for the person he had a crush on. Honestly, it made him feel a little cute.

But Taejun’s next words completely exceeded Secretary Choi’s expectations.

“No, it’s not for me to wear.”

“Yes?”

“I’m going to buy some for Cha Haeshin to wear. Not just clothes, bags, shoes, all that new stuff. So just keep that in mind for now. I’ll ask his size and let you know again.”

“Ah…….”

“No, wait. He might not even know what size actually fits him properly, so I’ll just go with him directly. It’d be better to show him everything in person.”

Secretary Choi’s thinking briefly froze, but Taejun kept chattering on without pause.

“He’s always worn hand-me-downs from other people, so when would he have had the chance to know his proper size?”

The muttering voice sounded genuinely upset and heartbroken, and it was unmistakably Han Taejun’s voice. Yet for the first time since being hired as his secretary, Secretary Choi found that voice unfamiliar.

“He probably doesn’t even know what style he likes, so just tell them to prepare a bunch of everything. Think of it as finding the taste of someone who knows nothing, got it?”

Moreover, Secretary Choi had rarely seen Han Taejun speak so passionately and at such length. And for it to be about clothes and shoes for someone else, no less.

“Mr. President.”

“Yeah???”

“I’m really sorry, but…….”

“What are you suddenly sorry for?”

“Do you know when my birthday is?”

The question was so out of left field that Taejun raised an eyebrow.

“What nonsense is this all of a sudden.”

“I’m sorry. It just feels like the Han Taejun Mr. President I know isn’t here right now.”

“Seriously.”

Taejun reacted as if it were absurd, but Secretary Choi, who had watched him for a long time, could tell. He was, incredibly, feeling embarrassed right now. For some reason, goosebumps rose all over Secretary Choi’s body.

“I’m wondering if maybe your soul got swapped or something.”

At Secretary Choi’s following words, Taejun inwardly chuckled. His soul hadn’t been swapped, but since the same soul kept regressing, it was sort of similar in a way.

“Stop saying weird stuff and check my schedule. Let me know as soon as a date is set. The sooner the better.”

“Yes, understood. Should I say we’ll look at clothes for you as well, Mr. President?”

“No, I don’t need any.”

The person who had just been enthusiastically telling him to prepare this and that had vanished in an instant.

This was the Han Taejun Secretary Choi knew. He was someone completely uninterested in luxury goods, in adorning himself with them, or in showing them off to others.

As Secretary Choi savored the strange mix of unfamiliarity and familiarity and was about to leave the president’s office, Taejun suddenly spoke from behind.

“Jungho.”

“Yes, Mr. President.”

“So…… in your opinion. I don’t dress badly, right?”

“Mr. President, please. Just answer my question about my birthday once.”

Secretary Choi had no choice but to ask the most important question of his life to the president he served, one more time.

☂️

“Mr. Cha Haeshin?”

“Yes? Ah, yes!”

Haeshin, who had sunk into the back seat lost in deep thought, startled at the voice calling him, straightened his back, and answered hurriedly.

A somewhat unfamiliar face turned from the driver’s seat to look at Haeshin. It was Jang In-gyu, who had recently taken on the dual role of Haeshin’s secret bodyguard and driver.

“We’ve arrived.”

“Ah……! Ah, yes! We’re here already. Sorry, I was spacing out.”

“It’s fine. You don’t need to apologize for something like that.”

At In-gyu’s polite reply, Haeshin bowed his head awkwardly. Like Secretary Choi, dealing with people who treated him with such perfect courtesy still felt unfamiliar.

But In-gyu’s awkwardness wasn’t the issue right now. A much bigger problem was right in front of him. Haeshin let out a small sigh and looked out the car window at the familiar neighborhood spread before him.

The narrow, steep slope that cars couldn’t climb, the densely packed one-room houses squeezed between them. The place where Haeshin had stayed for a very long time, hated intensely for a very long time, and sometimes missed for a very long time.

The place where his mother was still living alone even now.

“If you’d like, I can walk you all the way to the house.”

In-gyu spoke cautiously, reading Haeshin’s hesitation. Haeshin blinked rapidly as if snapping back to reality and shook his head.

“No, it’s okay. Thank you just for offering. I’ll be back soon. I’ll call when I’m ready to leave if you’re parked somewhere comfortable.”

It was Haeshin who first refused In-gyu’s offer to escort him to the door. It probably wouldn’t take long, but he didn’t want In-gyu standing in front of the house, nor did he want to talk to his mom while being conscious of In-gyu’s presence.

Moreover, though the chances were low, he had to consider the possibility of running into Jin Youngmin. That was also why In-gyu hadn’t insisted.

Unless absolutely necessary, do not let Jin Youngmin discover your existence. That was one of Taejun’s important instructions as well. In-gyu nodded obediently.

“Yes. If you notice anything strange at all, contact me immediately. Even if it seems trivial, or even if nothing happens at all, it’s fine. Contact me no matter what.”

“Ah, yes…….”

“Han Taejun Mr. President assigned me to stay by Mr. Haeshin’s side to keep Mr. Cha Haeshin safe. If I fail in that duty, I’ll be reprimanded. So please don’t hesitate thinking ‘what if it’s nothing’, you must contact me.”

If I fail my duty, I’ll be the one who gets reprimanded. So don’t feel sorry or hesitant about calling on me.

Haeshin felt consideration in In-gyu’s words. And that consideration was, in turn, the consideration Han Taejun was showing him.