Mother Tape Chapter 7.1

“President.”

“Shut your mouth for now.”

Hwang Gujo looked at the side profile of Jaekwon, whose masseter muscle was defined, and bowed his head.

In any case, as the sole surviving family member, Jaekwon, who had taken a seat at the very front, had the duty to end this ridiculous memorial service.

At this point, he wondered if Kwak Bonyoung was screwing him over even in death. To think that with Seon Wisoo way back there, because of his own position, he had to wish for the peaceful repose of someone he did not even like, shackled by this empty honor that left him unable to do anything. A dog collar would be better.

Jaekwon stood up, lit an incense stick, and placed it. He stared daggers at Kwak Bonyoung’s memorial portrait, then bit his lip and bowed deeply.

‘I hate you.’

Did he think there was ever a time he had not said that?

‘You’re the one who made my mother, me, and us miserable! How dare you act pitiful. How dare you act like the victim!’

He had said that and gotten beaten up. Jaekwon had to be hospitalized.

When Jaekwon, with his fists clenched, straightened his back again, his expression was like a clean canvas, devoid of any emotion.

“My father.”

Jaekwon said to the monk presiding over the service.

“I hope he has gone to a good place for good.”

He smiled faintly and turned around.

The addition of ‘for good’ made the words sound strange somehow.

However, no one could ask about its true meaning. Now, following his lead, his uncles also stood up.

Before returning to his seat, Jaekwon stood tall and looked directly at the backmost seats where Seon Wisoo was. Seon Wisoo was in a worse state than when they first met. More gloomy, more melancholy, more pale. And the elderly man sitting next to him was, for some reason, more vibrant than when they had just met. As if he had stuck a straw into Seon Wisoo and was sucking out his vitality.

‘Look here.’

Jaekwon called to Wisoo in his mind.

‘Look here. I, the one you like so much, am right here.’

Time flows very slowly. Like a camera with a long exposure, only the people around them are bustling, while only Jaekwon and Seon Wisoo move slowly.

Look here.

Jaekwon’s lips stirred. Then, as if he had heard those words, Wisoo slowly lifted his head.

Yes. Like that, make eye contact. There’s no need for words. A look is enough.

Jaekwon, not even knowing what he was demanding of Wisoo, wished for him to say a single word. It felt like one word would be enough for everything.

However, the moment Seon Wisoo was about to lift his delicate eyelashes to look at him, a thin-skinned palm came out and blocked the space between them.

“……!”

It was Jeong Taegyu.

He smiled faintly at Jaekwon, then stared coldly from behind his glasses.

Jaekwon clenched his fist.

“Kwak Jaekwon, don’t.”

Hwang Gujo, having noticed, lowered his voice to stop him. He managed to pull the utterly unmoving man down into his seat and whispered quickly.

“Not here. Especially not in front of that man. If you give him any room to claim that you used violence against him or tried to take Seon Wisoo-ssi by force, you could lose all rights to Seon Wisoo-ssi altogether…!”

Those words became a brake for Jaekwon.

“I won’t.”

Jaekwon managed to answer, grinding his teeth. He finally turned his back on Seon Wisoo’s direction and faced forward.

He feels a belated gaze following his back. His back itches. He wants to turn around. He wants to ask if the reason the Teacher is letting him look at me now is because he is imposing a cruel lesson, to only look at what you can never have.

Jaekwon repeatedly crumpled his cigarette pack. If only this wasn’t within the temple grounds….

“Hey, Jaekwon-ah.”

It was Kwak Jaekyeong’s voice.

Jaekwon slowly lifted his head.

“The weather’s still really hot. What to do, it must be hot for my uncle on his way out.”

“Is that any business of the living?”

He genuinely wondered if that was any of his business.

Kwak Jaekyeong froze for a moment at Jaekwon’s cold words, then smiled with his well-practiced social grace.

“You’re right. He’s already passed away, so what does the heat matter. Right?”

Jaekwon put a cigarette to his lips, then took it away again. He is genuinely annoyed.

“I don’t think you were that close with my father before.”

He muttered slowly, his gaze lowered. The cigarette’s spine broke in his hand.

“You must have been a good son in my place.”

“He seemed lonely, so he called for me often. So I kept him company and ran some errands for him.”

“What kind of errands. Something like money laundering?”

“Huh?”

Jaekwon lifted his head at an angle. Then he smiled brightly. It was such a refreshing smile that it made his earlier pointed words feel like an auditory hallucination.

“Just kidding.”

“…What kind of a joke is that, you punk. Haha.”

Looking at Kwak Jaekyeong’s awkward laugh, Jaekwon flicked his lighter open with a click-clack and then closed it. Then he asked in a casual tone.

“Did you come to the house where Seon Wisoo is a few days ago?”

“…….”

The sound of cicadas is overwhelming. Their shrill cries filled the space between the two men completely.

“What are you talking about. Why would I go there. You’re telling a lot of jokes today?”

Kwak Jaekyeong answered breezily.

Jaekwon broke the already broken cigarette one more time, then shoved it into Kwak Jaekyeong’s suit pocket.

“This one isn’t a joke.”

“…….”

“You must have said that prepared for what would happen if it’s a lie.”

“Hey. You’re talking as if I’m some subordinate of yours….”

“You said you needed money.”

Jaekwon cut him off abruptly. Just like when he broke the cigarette.

“Give me your business card. Thinking about it, family should help each other out, who else is there to help.”

“Uh, uh?”

“Maybe I’m feeling sentimental because it’s the 49th day memorial. If you don’t want to, then never mind.”

At those words, Kwak Jaekyeong, with a bewildered face, took out his metal business card case. Jaekwon snatched the card with his index and middle fingers and turned away without any proper farewell.

“Call me! I’ll be waiting, okay?”

He ignored the shout coming from behind him.

Jaekwon went to Hwang Gujo and held out the business card.

“From now on, dig into this place too.”

“Where is this…. It’s Kwak Jaekyeong-ssi’s production company?”

“It’s that bastard. He’s the one who came by.”

“Are you going to fight with your family? Isn’t catching one con man who wants to be a savior enough for you?”

Shoving gum into his mouth, Jaekwon let out a hollow laugh.

“Originally, the history of all fights begins between family. Didn’t you know?”

❖ ❖ ❖

Throughout the 49th day memorial service, Wisoo was by the Teacher’s side, feeling more tormented than if he were sitting on a cushion of needles.

“Just looking like this is fine.”

The Teacher whispered. Just a moment ago, he had blocked their view when their eyes were about to meet…. It meant it was only possible under his permission, not by Wisoo’s will.

Wisoo looked at Jaekwon with a heart that felt like crying. He pretended his expression was fine. To show agitation would be the foolish act of taking the bait the Teacher had thrown. He knew well that the Teacher was letting him see Kwak Jaekwon’s back right now to make him agitated, to show an opening.

And at the same time, he was making him understand his place.

“I’m fine too. Even if I don’t look.”

Wisoo lowered his gaze.

“Is that so? That person will be disappointed. He seemed to care for you.”

Wisoo’s hand flinches. The sound of the wind chime tickled his neck, giving him goosebumps.

“Teacher, are you there?”

The teacher that the Teacher calls refers to Chairman Kwak. He doesn’t usually call him that. He is doing this on purpose. By saying the same thing Secretary Shin used to say, he is sending the message that you can’t go anywhere anyway.

Wisoo wet his lips and shook his head. And he shakes it one more time.

“That person doesn’t care for me.”

“Is that so?”

“It’s only because that person’s assets are tied to me.”

He doesn’t want to be found out one bit. To avoid showing Jaekwon to the Teacher, Wisoo made an effort.

“So we are nothing to each other.”

“That person’s assets are with you?”

Wisoo couldn’t help but look at the Teacher with a slightly resentful gaze.

“You know everything….”

With the sound of the sutra chanting, Wisoo’s voice grew just a little louder.

“You know everything.”

The Teacher, Jeong Taegyu, tilted his head toward Wisoo and smiled, his eyes narrowing into crescents.

“The Teacher is always worried that our Wisoo might lie, knowing that.”

Wisoo’s hand was grabbed. The Teacher’s tight grip made his hand go numb. It felt like the blood wasn’t even circulating.

Wisoo decided to think that the tears welling up in his eyes were because of the pain. The fortunate thing was that they weren’t flowing.

“Ah….”

“Have you come?”

He blankly nodded his head.

It’s Kwak Bonyoung. Kwak Bonyoung is pulling at Jaekwon’s body, screaming curses. It must be nothing but malicious words and insults being poured out. But Jaekwon doesn’t stir one bit. The dead man is struggling, not wanting to leave, and holding onto Jaekwon’s arm, but Jaekwon is in the same posture as before, that upright posture that the gaze naturally follows, just as a moth is naturally drawn to light.

Kwak Bonyoung will probably go to hell. Wisoo, recalling the obsessive home he had created, hopes that a place like hell truly exists.

“It seems he is departing.”

“The monk must be a good person.”

“Indeed. Regrettably.”

The Teacher clicked his tongue.

Kwak Bonyoung is of no use anyway. Since his only blood relative doesn’t miss him but instead hates him, it’s unlikely he would ever come looking for the Teacher saying he missed his father.

Throwing away useless ingredients is better for the next dish. The Teacher smiled faintly at the news of the unseen Kwak Bonyoung’s departure.

“He should be going to a good place.”

The insincere words were an added bonus.

Wisoo, not even hearing those words, only looked at Jaekwon.

The curses Kwak Bonyoung utters do not reach him. He will never know. Because even if Wisoo dies, he will not tell him.

As the sutra ends, Kwak Bonyoung disappears. Jaekwon merely tilts his shoulder slightly, as if he was just uncomfortable from being in one position for a long time.

Wisoo bowed his head.

You are still someone I want to reach.

❖ ❖ ❖

The Teacher did not leave his seat and kept watch.

“I’m thinking of seeing Jaekyeong before I go. Want to stay with me?”

When the Teacher asked under the shade, fiddling with his cell phone, Wisoo naturally shook his head.

Jaekwon was among his family. There were so many people bustling around him that if he weren’t so tall, Wisoo thought he wouldn’t even have seen the top of his head.

“You’ve met Jaekyeong, right?”

At the Teacher’s question as he pushed up his glasses, Wisoo bit his lip.

He was cautious about what to say, not knowing what stories Kwak Jaekyeong might have told and to what extent.

“According to Jaekyeong, you’re doing well, but I can’t be reassured by just words like that. Ah, of course, I also heard you’ve been living a somewhat loosened lifestyle.”

The Teacher, who had put his phone in his pocket, crossed his arms. It was a posture he often showed when he was disciplining him. Wisoo swallows dryly. The day is so sweltering, yet he gets goosebumps. It’s chilling. To make matters worse, not even a breeze was blowing right now. He would feel better if he loosened his tie a bit, but Wisoo didn’t want to damage even slightly what Jaekwon had done for him.

“But it’s okay. If it’s just a little bit, it can be removed again. If what’s on the vessel is not a permanent flaw, then this Teacher can make it clean again. Whatever method it takes.”

“…….”

“Even if it has to be erased using a strong chemical, the one who dirtied it will have to bear the consequences.”

Wisoo turned his head. A bead of sweat trickled down his temple, past his cheek, and to the nape of his neck. The sensation is eerie.

In his turned field of vision, he saw a white-haired man passing by. He was wearing a navy blue summer suit.

“Ex, excuse me.”

Wisoo, in his urgency, let his lips part first.

“I need to use the restroom for a moment, Teacher.”

“Is that so? Then let’s go togeth…. Oh, dear.”

Just then, a call he had been waiting for came, and the Teacher pursed his lips. He looked back and forth between his cell phone and Wisoo and let out a sigh. Anyone watching would have thought he was a father parting with his late-born child, the apple of his eye.

“Then go and come back quickly. I need to go see Jaekyeong for a bit.”

He barely heard the added compliment, “He’s a smart kid.” The path he walked, trying not to look suspicious, felt endlessly long and agonizing.

Wisoo hurried until his shins ached. Fortunately, Na Hakyeong, the man in the navy blue summer suit, was also heading to the restroom. Wisoo quickly followed him in and slyly locked the door.

“Lawyer Grandpa.”

Na Hakyeong, who had come in to relieve himself, was startled by the sudden voice calling him and turned around.

“Chairman Kwak’s… his, that, omega?”

“Not Chairman Kwak’s omega, my name is Seon Wisoo.”

Wisoo corrected him properly and approached.

“Grandpa.”

“Grandpa…. I suppose it’s because of my white hair, but this is just a family genetic…”

The flustered Na Hakyeong rambled.

But Wisoo didn’t have time to listen. He took out his cell phone. He opened the memo app and typed on the keyboard with clumsy hands. As he did so, he opened his mouth and said this.

“I enjoyed the cake you sent me back then.”

“Cake…?”

[I want to consult you]

“Yes. Kwak Jaekwon-ssi said it was big, so we should share it.”

“Ah, ah….”

Na Hakyeong, looking back and forth between the memo pad and Wisoo’s face, nodded his head in a daze.

“Even if you didn’t buy it for me, I felt I should say thank you.”

[I want to release the assets tied to me]
[I want to return it to Kwak Jaekwon-ssi]

His typos got worse out of anxiety. The fact that he had to talk about something else while writing, in case someone was eavesdropping, was also an ordeal, as he didn’t know how much the Teacher was involved in.

Still, one fortunate thing was that Na Hakyeong was quick on the uptake.

He nodded and replied.

“Ah. I’m glad you liked it. Did Kwak Jaekwon-ssi like it too?”

“Yes. He really liked it.”

[I’ll contact you]

“If you need, I can buy another one and send it.”

Na Hakyeong took the phone held out to him and keyed in his number. Wisoo, having gotten it back, stared intently at Na Hakyeong.

The young omega Chairman Kwak kept. The first person to discover him at the moment of his death. With all these things, the world’s prejudice is bound to be one-sided. It was the same for Na Hakyeong. His impression of Seon Wisoo was that of an omega with a dirty reputation, someone who was already twisting his life at such a young age.

But not anymore. The gaze staring at him was straight, and there wasn’t a hint of hideous desire in it.

“Or, shall I give you the name of the bakery?”

Wisoo finally relaxed a little and managed a small smile.

“It would be better if you contacted Kwak Jaekwon-ssi directly. He’ll be happy.”

This was no longer a story about a cake that didn’t even exist.

Wisoo looked at the entered number and pressed the call button. Na Hakyeong’s cell phone rang. Wisoo smiled as if he were about to cry.

“Please answer the phone. I’ll use the restroom and then go.”

Na Hakyeong saw the unfamiliar number—but a number whose caller was clear—and nodded. As soon as he answered with “Hello,” the call was cut off, but the quick-witted lawyer pretended to be on the phone and left the restroom.

Wisoo stalled for a moment. He couldn’t move easily anyway. He needlessly flushed the toilet and went to the sink, turning on the water full blast.

“…….”

He stared blankly at the gushing foam, then lifted his head.

His reflection in the mirror has an unfamiliar face. It’s distorted, yet somehow relieved, and at the same time, terrified.

The Teacher found out that Chairman Kwak had tied his assets to me. The Teacher won’t just let it be. He’ll use it somehow. As if that’s not enough, he’ll find a way to make even Kwak Jaekwon-ssi his client.

His family is all dead. The things he holds dear do not exist at present. But, if by any chance, he holds even a little bit of attachment to me, then I would be a fine blade to stab Kwak Jaekwon with, and a bridle to control him with.

“…Horrible.”

He splashed water on his face and muttered. His lips trembled violently behind his covering palm.

The most horrible thing was himself, who, knowing that Jaekwon would be in danger, still wished to be that kind of existence to him.

He is getting greedy. He now realizes that the reason for it is not simply because he is curious about him and wants him to be safe.

Wisoo rummaged through the pages of the numerous books he had read in his mind. All sorts of sentences that tried to explain the most difficult and complex emotions were pointing to one thing.

Love.

Seon Wisoo is in love with Kwak Jaekwon.

❖ ❖ ❖

“Why does your face look like this.”

“It was hot, so I came back after washing my face.”

Wisoo smiled faintly. At that, the Teacher clicked his tongue, took out a handkerchief from his pocket, and personally wiped his face. It was a very expensive handkerchief. Anyone watching would think he genuinely cherished him. He himself had thought so once.

However, the Teacher, while pretending to wipe Wisoo’s face, leans his head close and whispers this.

“Jaekyeong will contact you from time to time. Make sure you answer his calls. For now, it seems it would be good to stay by Kwak Jaekwon-ssi’s side. If there’s anything that person likes, find out everything. It would be best if that thing were a person.”

“…….”

“Anyone… do you have anyone in mind?”

Wisoo lifts his clear, composed face and answers.

“There’s no one.”

“…….”

“Not at all, not even a little.”

The fortunate thing is that his feelings of affection cannot sway Kwak Jaekwon. A bitter and fortunate solace for him.

“Is that so…. About my promise with you, it’s alright to break it a little. A little spicy food, a little sweet food, you can eat a little of that.”

Pretending to smile affectionately, the Teacher shot a cold gaze from behind his glasses.

“But if you cross the line, you will have to be punished. Do you understand.”

“…….”

“Your room, I have it cleaned spotlessly every day.”

“…Yes.”

Wisoo looked over the Teacher’s shoulder.

There, having dismissed the people around him at some point, was Kwak Jaekwon, standing alone.

He was looking at him, and at the Teacher, with eyes that could kill. He was burning that intensely. The emotion was vivid. Wisoo, flustered, turned his head away. He deliberately avoided his gaze even though their eyes had met. In order not to be found out.

At that, the Teacher, perhaps thinking his threat had worked, made a satisfied expression. Then, after stroking Wisoo’s head, he placed his hand on it and squeezed hard. His grip, which he worked on tirelessly despite his small frame, pressed down on Wisoo’s head as if to split it open.

“Ugh, ughh…!”

Even though it was a familiar pain, Wisoo’s hands trembled violently, simply because it had been a while.

“Listen to the Teacher well. The Teacher is always thinking only of you.”

“Ugh, hah…!”

“You have no one but the Teacher. You know that, right?”

Wisoo barely managed to nod. Only then did the Teacher release his hand.

Then, without looking back, he left the spot. A tremendous aftershock of pain remained, and Wisoo staggered and stood with his back against a pillar.

As soon as Jeong Taegyu left, another cousin, not Jaekyeong, stopped Jaekwon, who was about to rush over.

“Hey, Kwak Jaekwon. It’s been a while. I didn’t see you at the funeral procession the other day, right? How did you get even more hand….”

“Get lost.”

Jaekwon ground his teeth. His aura was so beastly for a moment that his cousin retreated pathetically.

Jaekwon pushed him away and strode forward, but the spot where Wisoo had been was empty.

Jaekwon stood blankly like a lost child, and people surrounded him once again.

This interruption, all of this, feels so orchestrated that Jaekwon feels like screaming in the middle of the crowd. The sky is terribly clear, and the air is heavy with humidity. Jaekwon pushed his way through them. Every touch of skin feels unpleasant.

He searched the entire temple grounds without regard for the heat. He found Wisoo in the outer part of the grounds, near the Chilseonggak hall, almost at the exit.

“Seon Wisoo-ssi.”

He had thought he would be angry when he found him. Why he had left that spot instead of staying, why he had just listened to that old man’s words, why he doesn’t ask him for help.

However, seeing Seon Wisoo turn to look at him with the colorful painting of the Chilseong Yeoraedo as a backdrop, he was at a loss for words.

“The Teacher.”

Wisoo put on a brave smile. A lie. Even though his eyes looked as if they would spill tears at any moment.

“He’s more pathetic than I thought, isn’t he?”

“…….”

“But….”

Wisoo, who had been fidgeting with his hands and hesitating, lowers his head completely. A soft, wet voice came out as if it were crawling.

“But why am I so scared…?”

As soon as he heard that voice, Jaekwon postponed his anger and postponed his scolding. The only thing he could do was immediately stride over and hug Seon Wisoo. For fear that he might hide away into that Yeoraedo painting. No, for fear that the Yeoraes might hide him away. If they put you inside a heavenly peach so that I can never find you, I will not be able to find your downy cheeks or the nape of your neck.

Jaekwon, while holding Wisoo, repeatedly rested his chin on the crown of his head and rubbed their cheeks together before answering.

“I told you.”

It’s strange. Until just a moment ago, every touch of skin and fabric was unpleasant.

“That I will become a scarier person to you.”

“…….”

“Are you not scared of me?”

Yes. I’m not scared. I like you….

However, Wisoo did not answer and hugged Jaekwon back.

“I’m scared….”

Fear is Wisoo’s oldest emotion, the emotion that has taken up the largest pie and dominated him. There is no piece of Wisoo that it has not invaded. Even the words ‘I like you’ would be the same. So, Wisoo substitutes his confession with these words.

“I’m scared….”

As much as the emotion that is the oldest to me, has been with me the most, and torments and dominates me the most, I… you.

❖ ❖ ❖

The car starts. Wisoo, without realizing it, knelt on the seat and looked back. Beyond the rear window, he saw Kwak Jaekyeong standing there, hands stuck in his pockets, looking this way. The Teacher was not visible. Did he meet with Kwak Jaekyeong? When will Na Hakyeong contact me? I have to do it before the Teacher makes a move.

“Sit properly. It’s dangerous.”

Jaekwon pulled Wisoo, who was like that.

He sat as he was led. His heart is pounding. He pressed down on his panting sternum, like someone who had run fast and returned, and looked at Jaekwon.

“Were you okay today?”

“What is there not to be okay about. It’s a good thing. As the old people say, whether he has more trials after the 49th day or not, the living have done all they can….”

Jaekwon, who for some reason was holding a tablet and looking at something intently, unlike his usual self, looked at Wisoo.

“So.”

“…….”

“Seon Wisoo-ssi won’t be seeing Kwak Bonyoung anymore either, right.”

“……!”

For a moment, Wisoo’s breath caught in his throat.

“H-how… how did you know…? No, things like that… you don’t even believe them….”

“I don’t believe them.”

Jaekwon turned his gaze back to the tablet. He spreads and closes his fingers, as if checking something.

“But the fact that Seon Wisoo-ssi is scared is real, isn’t it.”

“…….”

“Seon Wisoo-ssi is still a kid, and since a person died right in front of your eyes, I thought you might ‘think you see’ Kwak Bonyoung, whether due to guilt or trauma.”

“I… really….”

“Even if that’s real to Seon Wisoo-ssi, this is the only way I can understand it. I’ve made an effort too, so please be a little understanding.”

Finally turning the tablet off completely, Jaekwon put it in the front pocket. He crosses his legs and looks back at Wisoo.

“The 49th day memorial and what not, actually, it doesn’t matter to me if we do it or not. But since we did it anyway, Seon Wisoo-ssi’s mind will be a bit more at ease.”

Turning his body slightly to the side, he reached his hand toward Wisoo’s cheek. The cheek, which had been covered in a cold sweat and then dried, felt like it would become chapped and rough. His skin was that delicate.

“Don’t see things like that anymore.”

“…….”

“As I said, you only need to be scared of me. Simple, right?”

Jaekwon smiled, playfully yet kindly.

Wisoo pressed his lips together tightly, feeling like he was about to burst into tears.

“You don’t even understand me, and you don’t believe what I see… so why are you being so nice to me and accommodating me like this?”

“I guess it doesn’t matter.”

Jaekwon answered as indifferently as if it were truly someone else’s business.

“Thinking about it, neither my father nor my mother were in their right minds. Then I’d be closer to the crazy side than the sane side, so what can’t I do for something like this.”

“…….”

“That’s not to say that Seon Wisoo-ssi is any less crazy than me.”

Jaekwon said playfully and tapped Wisoo’s temple with his index and middle fingers in a way that wasn’t unpleasant.

To be so gentle at a time like this…. To say something like this at a time like this. Wisoo dropped his gaze. He is ecstatically happy. He had wished for words like these. It’s okay if you don’t see anything, it’s fine if you don’t get better. Whether you’re really seeing something or if you’re not in your right mind isn’t important…. Kwak Jaekwon is saying such things.

Excluding his parents, whose faces he had already forgotten, he was the person he most wished would say such things, but along with the ecstasy, he felt like he was plummeting. He must not become a precious person to Kwak Jaekwon. On his scales, he must always remain an infinitely light existence.

“Hey. Even if Kwak Jaekwon-ssi says things like that without believing me, I don’t like it at all.”

Lifting his head, Wisoo smiled bravely.

“Anyway, you’re treating me like a crazy person. That’s too mean.”

He pretended not to understand the meaning behind Jaekwon’s words at all.

Hwang Gujo, in the driver’s seat, glanced at Wisoo through the rearview mirror. He used to say nonsensical things, but he hadn’t spoken such complete gibberish before.

Jaekwon, too, seems to be having the same thought, as he is watching Wisoo as if observing him. But he didn’t ask further. It seemed he also thought that since Wisoo had met the Teacher, he would be somewhat out of his mind.

He pulled Wisoo by the arm and brought him close.

“Alright. Sorry.”

Seeing him spit out something that wasn’t even an apology, it seemed he meant to leave it at that.

The three are in the same space but lost in their own different thoughts. Hwang Gujo is an audience member observing the two, and Jaekwon is thinking… about the existence of the Teacher, who is far more pathetic than he thought, and about Seon Wisoo, who is more tied to such a pathetic existence than he thought.

And Seon Wisoo….

He has a clear face, but his inner thoughts are complex. Like a clear lake, its depth cannot be fathomed.

❖ ❖ ❖

“Are you going to sleep here? You should just stay at the hotel longer.”

“No. It’s okay.”

Jaekwon answered while holding Wisoo, who had fallen asleep at some point.

“Get home safely. The weather’s gotten bad.”

Hwang Gujo nodded. Jaekwon lightly closed the car door and went up to the gloomy and dismal house. The air was so heavy that it felt even more so, yet his feelings were different from when he came alone. Was it because he was holding Seon Wisoo?

After pressing the password and entering through the front door, Jaekwon called Wisoo once they were finally and completely alone.

“I know you’re awake.”

Instead of an answer, Wisoo wrapped his arms around Jaekwon’s neck.

“I carried you this far, isn’t that enough.”

“Am I heavy for you?”

“That’s not it.”

“Am I a burden to you?”

“That’s not it either.”

Jaekwon feels the urge to smoke. He intends to put Wisoo down and have a smoke.

But Wisoo tightened his arms around Jaekwon. Suddenly, he felt a thick pheromone, strong enough to push away the humid air. Had Seon Wisoo’s pheromones ever been this dense? It still had a high transparency, but its density was high. The skin on Jaekwon’s nape stiffened with tension.

“Then let’s go in together.”

“…We’re already inside.”

“Sleep with me.”

“We’ve been doing that all along lately.”

“You know that’s not what I’m talking about.”

“Then look me straight in the eyes and say it. Don’t ask for it so cowardly like this.”

Jaekwon will be a strict guardian. But he won’t lose his affection and kindness. Wisoo detached himself and, as told, faced him.

Before he knew it, Jaekwon’s pheromones, carried by Wisoo’s, are tangling together like intricately woven threads.

“Sleep with me tonight.”

“…….”

“You know I like it even when you tie me up, even when you neglect me….”

Isn’t this enough to be your preference? he asks with his eyes.

My preference.

Jaekwon can’t even remember what his preference was. Like a wave had swept over it, all that’s left is a clean new sandy beach. Only Seon Wisoo stands on it.

“I want to have sex with Kwak Jaekwon-ssi.”

Wisoo asked with his youthful face, emitting a thick pheromone.

Jaekwon comes to the realization that he would have gotten aroused even if Seon Wisoo had only smelled faintly of a child’s sweat. The pheromones are just one trigger. Among countless others.

“Seon Wisoo-ssi. By any chance, did you meet the Teacher today and now you want to sleep with me as an act of rebellion against him?”

Wisoo, who had opened his eyes wide, soon curved them into a smile and replied.

“If that were the reason, I would have deserved to be called a slut.”

“I see.”

“I have my preferences too.”

“And I’m Seon Wisoo-ssi’s preference?”

“Yes. Even if Kwak Jaekwon-ssi’s preference isn’t me.”

Jaekwon readjusted the arm supporting Wisoo’s buttocks, lifting him higher. After holding him more tightly, he hooked his hand around his heel and took off his shoes. Thud, thud, the sounds were heard, and then he too took off his shoes and headed not to the second floor… but to the master bedroom on the first floor.

“Try to forget everything I said. I don’t want to be a bastard who goes back on his word, so I have to be a little cheeky, what can I do.”

It was true that he had deliberately chosen the first-floor bedroom. Because of the sheets he had dirtied and the linens he had stripped off, the room was in a chaotic state, and the bed was just a bare mattress. Laying Wisoo down on it, Jaekwon pulled on Wisoo’s necktie and untied it.

It seems this is the pleasure of dressing someone up. To meticulously destroy what you have meticulously dressed with your own hands. Ah, why hadn’t I tried this sooner. This was, without a doubt, my ultimate preference.

❖ ❖ ❖

Only the necktie was completely undone; the shirt was only partially unbuttoned. The shirt was open to just above his navel. His knees were still off the bed, in a half-lying state. Onto Wisoo, Jaekwon placed one knee and took off his jacket.

“What are you going to say this time.”

“Yes…?”

“Words that will ruin the mood. Enough to make my dick go limp.”

Wisoo swallowed dryly and bit his lip. The sight of Jaekwon undressing while saying such things was driving him crazy with how erotic it was, and having to think of mood-killing words while watching this was an ordeal.

“Don’t even bring up the Teacher or Kwak Bonyoung. I’ll seriously get erectile dysfunction.”

Jaekwon grumbled, even though there was no chance of that happening.

“Besides, I’m going to look into that person, so think of something else.”

Wisoo, watching the muscles twitching under Jaekwon’s open shirt, barely managed to move his stiff tongue.

“Hy-hyung…?”

“Rejected.”

Jaekwon threw his shirt on the floor and now unbuckled his belt.

“That sounds like it would turn me on more. Something else?”

As Wisoo, influenced by the undressing man, tried to clumsily take off his own jacket, Jaekwon stopped him. Let me undress you, he said, not letting him lift a single finger as he took off the jacket with his own hands. It is thrown not onto the floor, but into the top corner of the bed.

“Why this room? Isn’t this room alone enough to kill the mood for you?”

“It’s a room I was going to ruin someday anyway, so I thought it would be nice to dirty it myself. It doesn’t feel good, but as I’m unwrapping Seon Wisoo-ssi piece by piece, it’s okay again. Ah, I’m the one who stripped the sheets. It doesn’t matter, right? So, have you thought of anything?”

Jaekwon was about to unbutton Wisoo’s shirt but stopped his hand. Instead, he unbuckled his belt and likewise threw it into the corner of the bed, and next, he took off his pants. He leaves the socks on. A white shirt with black socks and thin, short briefs. A fetishistic and truly fucking sick preference. It is by no means my preference… he can’t even say things like that anymore. Jaekwon’s dick was so heavily erect that he wondered if it might fall below his thigh.

“Ah, dad….”

Jaekwon’s hand, which was unzipping his pants, stopped.

“How about dad?”

“…Hah.”