Black Paradise Chapter 5.1

“Mr. Kwon Ilyeong.”

How much time had passed?

Ilyeong blinked at the feeling of someone lightly tapping his cheek. His mouth was already so completely filled with a fishy metallic smell that it was hard even to breathe. It was right after he had taken the third load. The second one had also been in his mouth, and the third was on his face. Neither was a particularly refined taste. He furrowed his brow at the thought.

“Did you, by any chance, pass out?”

As he spoke, the penis that had been pulled back was thrust mercilessly into his throat again. If he was going to do that, why did he pretend to be worried? Ilyeong tried to force his heavy eyelids open and glared at the brute’s face.

Seo Juhyeok smiled, the corners of his mouth lifting. Though his eyes were still cold, his face had regained its composure and false smile, making Ilyeong want to punch him.

At some point, Ilyeong found himself lying on the floor, sucking on the penis of Seo Juhyeok, who was on top of him. He did not know when they had gotten into this position. He only had a clear memory of the moment he had frowned because kneeling was uncomfortable, and Seo Juhyeok had pushed him by the shoulders, laid him on the floor, and gotten on top.

When he blinked, the sticky sweat and semen clinging to his eyelashes blurred his vision, which was unpleasant. This was why he had kept his eyes closed. When he shook his head slightly to indicate that he had not passed out, Seo Juhyeok moved his hips slowly, as if to say, then that’s fine. The head of the penis immediately scraped against the roof of his sensitive mouth.

“Hh… Ah…”

Worn-out moans spilled out. Seo Juhyeok also exhaled a breath like a sigh, slowly rubbing the head of his penis against the narrowing space inside Ilyeong’s mouth. As he tilted his head back, his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down along his neckline.

Fumbling, Ilyeong raised a hand and gripped his thigh. Seo Juhyeok merely raised an eyebrow and did not stop him. As soon as the penis was pulled out of his mouth, a weak cough burst out. The semen he had shot during the first ejaculation, which had been pooled in his throat, came pouring out just like that. His chest ached to the point of numbness and his mouth throbbed, but he clenched his teeth, trying not to show any sign of pain.

“If you’re having a hard time, let’s stop.”

“…”

Ilyeong swallowed his reply. He felt it was not something the man who had been ruthlessly probing inside his mouth since forcing it open should say. He wanted to be sarcastic, but he did not have much energy left.

He knelt again between the legs of Seo Juhyeok, who was sitting on the edge of the bed. He clicked his tongue at the thing that was still menacingly erect even after ejaculating three times in a row. He immediately enveloped the head with the membrane of his lips, licked it a few times, and then swallowed it down to the back of his throat in one go. After a few thrusts, he managed to open his throat wide enough for the pubic hair to just about touch the tip of his nose. The feeling of his throat swelling abnormally was strange.

After repeating the motion of sucking it in and letting it go, he pressed his lips against the scrotum and raised his gaze. Until then, Ilyeong had been consciously avoiding eye contact. He did not want to feel like they were connecting through an act like this. But that flimsy pride had long since faded.

Was it on the deck? When Seo Juhyeok had confessed that he got turned on by his face. So, with the thought of letting him look his fill and cum quickly as he wished, he did not avoid his gaze. As expected, the composure began to vanish from his dark pupils.

After a brief pause, he wiped the semen from around Ilyeong’s eyes and swept back his disheveled hair. Acting all affectionate now. Ilyeong put the scrotum in his mouth and sucked on it for a bit more, then let it go with a smack sound before taking the cock back into his mouth and starting to suck on it as if licking a delicious food.

“Hoo…”

A hot breath was exhaled, and the hand caressing his cheek tensed. Thinking this was the last time, he pressured him at an even faster pace. A hand slid past his ear and gripped his hair. The thigh muscles he had been bracing himself on with his hands suddenly tensed as if contorting, and then he began to shoot.

Ilyeong waited with his mouth held open as the thing that had pushed roughly deep inside his mouth finished spewing all its semen. Seo Juhyeok, who had always immediately thrust his penis back into his mouth right after ejaculating, for some reason, pulled it out quickly this time.

Ilyeong spat everything that had pooled in his mouth directly onto the carpeted floor. Stomach acid had regurgitated with it, so it was less viscous. He was about to raise his gaze but paused when he noticed Seo Juhyeok’s penis, still half-hard. He asked the silent man.

“Should I do more?”

His throat felt like it was being torn and it hurt every time he spoke. Do more? His head was ringing and he was so tired he could barely lift a finger, but that thread of pride still held on. Seo Juhyeok, who he had expected to tell him not to provoke him and force his mouth open again, just shook his head expressionlessly.

“That’s enough. I don’t particularly feel like doing more.”

Perhaps his head had also calmed down during the several ejaculations, as his voice and tone were devoid of heat. Seo Juhyeok reached out, pulled out a few tissues, and neatly wiped his hand and his penis before arranging his clothes.

With just a few movements, he returned to his initial pristine state. He looked so perfect that it was hard to believe he was the same person who had been getting turned on by Ilyeong and thrusting his penis at him just moments ago.

Ilyeong stared blankly at the tissues handed to him, then observed his reflection in the mirror. Not only was his face a mess with sweat and semen, but his clothes were also in such a state that he looked as if he had rolled around in a trash can. The worn-out, stretched-out clothes exposed his neckline and shoulders as they were. Maybe it was just his imagination, but he felt like his entire body reeked of the foul smell from the slum.

The very picture of a sewer rat. The difference made his mood hit rock bottom. The white tissue crumpled under his palm.

“The contract you made with Colonel Jamie Moore.”

Seo Juhyeok abruptly brought up Jamie in a low, subdued voice. It seemed he had been thinking about something all this time, and it looked like that was what had been on his mind.

Ilyeong looked at him without a word. Seo Juhyeok did not wait for an answer either and spoke nonchalantly, meeting his gaze at an angle.

“I heard the Colonel promised to guarantee Mr. Kwon Ilyeong’s future.”

“Yes.”

Although it seemed Jamie had never intended to honor such a contract in the first place.

Judging by his calm gaze, it seemed he wanted to point out the same thing. But if Seo Juhyeok tried to tear up his heart with sharp words again, Ilyeong was prepared to claw back at him with even sharper ones.

That kind of fight had repeated itself several times since he entered this room. The end of the fellatio might have been a kind of request for a truce, but Ilyeong also knew that they were both already deeply hurt emotionally.

As proof, the taut tension in the room remained thick and unresolved. All that was left after tearing each other apart was a rotten peace, intact only on the surface.

No one believes in something so flimsy that it could break at any moment. As he racked his frayed, tattered brain, choosing the words that would cut him up most painfully, Seo Juhyeok said something unexpected.

“I’ll do that for you, so stop worrying about the Colonel now.”

Ilyeong’s hand, which had been brushing off his clothes, paused.

“Why would you, Mr. Seo Juhyeok?”

“Do you need a justification for this too? Because I’m the one who ruined the contract.”

Although they were using polite speech with each other, the atmosphere was, as ever, as precarious as a grenade about to explode. Suddenly, this whole emotional game felt utterly pointless.

No, perhaps ridiculous would be a more accurate expression. Seo Juhyeok had more than enough power to crush those around him, while he was just putting up a front with nothing but a clumsy sense of pride.

Ilyeong managed to lift only the corners of his mouth into a smile. Though in Seo Juhyeok’s eyes, it would probably just look like he was acting aloof to protect a pride that was not even worth a damn.

“Forget it. What could I possibly trust about Mr. Seo Juhyeok to entrust my future to you?”

“It seems you no longer have any intention of even paying lip service about trusting me.”

“No.”

At the dry reply, Seo Juhyeok let out a short laugh.

“And you’ve become fearless again.”

“That’s not something the person who got angry because I was a little scared should say. You said you have a taste for someone who acts up, so what wouldn’t I do to look good for you? I have no choice but to play along.”

“Do you even want to look good for me? You need to get your story straight. It was Mr. Kwon Ilyeong who came at me proposing a deal first.”

“Yes. I sucked Mr. Seo Juhyeok’s cock so hard my throat is sore, so I would really appreciate it if you kept that promise.”

It was the moment a crack ran through the peace. A heavy silence fell. Ilyeong looked up, observing his reaction. He had just experienced firsthand that while his rudeness and disrespect up to now had been treated as cute, if it went too far, it would be met with punishment, so all his senses were on high alert.

Seo Juhyeok, who had frowned as if about to retort, sighed silently and then gestured with his chin towards the clothes strewn on the floor.

“I’m tired of arguing, so get changed. We have to attend the banquet, late as it is. I chose the size by eye, but it should fit you well enough without alterations.”

Ilyeong glanced at the closed door. He had been so out of it that he had not even considered the person who might be beyond it. Soundproofing aside, just by looking at the fishy metallic smell and the mess in the room, it would be obvious what had happened here. Dammit. A wave of dizziness washed over him.

Ilyeong barely managed to swallow down the throbbing headache and tried to smile.

“If possible, please find another partner. I’m worried I might provoke Mr. Seo Juhyeok’s temper even more.”

“I’m a bit worried about that too.”

“Then…”

“But then there would be no point in Mr. Kwon Ilyeong having sucked my cock so hard.”

Ilyeong stood there motionlessly, waiting for him to continue. A bad feeling made his jaw muscles clench at once.

“You said you wanted to live. That’s why I’m taking Mr. Kwon Ilyeong as my partner, so what’s the point if you refuse?”

Seo Juhyeok gestured to the clothes once more, as if telling him to hurry up and get ready if he understood. Then, without taking his eyes off the motionless Ilyeong, he turned his head toward the closed door.

“Ann. Come in and help Doctor Kwon get dressed. I know you’re still there.”

Seo Juhyeok briefly frowned as if feeling a headache, then walked over to the sofa he had been sitting on initially.

At the same time, the door opened with a small, silent crack. Ann, who squeezed through the gap, had a deathly pale face.

He did not know what she might have imagined while waiting outside the door. However, her thin, tightly shut lips parted helplessly as she looked around the room, and the moment her eyes met Ilyeong’s, they opened wide enough for a whole egg to fit inside. Ann muttered a single “Oh my God,” and walked quickly into the room.

“Young master, I…”

“I know what you’re going to say. We need to get ready as quickly as possible.”

Seo Juhyeok muttered, running a hand through his hair with a tired expression. Ann, fumbling around like someone who did not know where to start, began pulling out a clump of tissues. The sound was quite loud.

In the midst of all that commotion, Ilyeong, who had been unable to even blink, haltingly opened his mouth.

“From the very beginning… there was no reason for me to open my mouth and beg you to save me, was there.”

It was a quiet voice, but all the noise in the room stopped as if by magic. Seo Juhyeok, who had been leaning against the back of the sofa, lifted his head and met Ilyeong’s eyes. Ilyeong put more strength into his voice. A searing pain followed in his throat, but he ignored it.

“You only realized it too late, so you’re the one at a loss.”

Seo Juhyeok, having delivered the kill shot, sneered as if the word “loss” was amusing.

“Ah…”

His whole head throbbed. Ilyeong touched his raw lips and clenched his teeth. Only two thoughts filled his mind now.

That there had been no need to swallow his pride and make a deal, and that attending as Seo Juhyeok’s partner was the only way to safely preserve his life.

It was not difficult to gauge which was more fucked up. The latter. For the former, he had brought this upon himself by provoking Seo Juhyeok first, but the latter was a truly unexpected problem, making it all the more bewildering.

Right now, Seo Juhyeok was holding a life jacket meant for exactly one person and urging him to put it on. Then what about the others, no, at the very least, what about Haoran and the carrier pigeon… Ilyeong squeezed his eyes shut.

“Why are you hesitating? Didn’t you want to live, Mr. Kwon Ilyeong?”

Seo Juhyeok sneered with his eyes. As if to say, why is a man who is so calculating and cold in all matters weighing his options now? And that observation pierced his very essence with pinpoint accuracy. He had to take that hand. Because it was a perfect temptation with no reason to refuse.

He had thought it before, but he truly, truly wished he could kill off every ounce of compassion in his life. If only he could put on the life jacket before him and just leave without a second glance at the other stragglers…

The faces of the carrier pigeon, who had danced about wanting to see Paradise, and Haoran, who had been looking forward to what he would do there, flashed through his mind. Fuck, fuck. The curses would not stop. Ilyeong opened his closed eyes and looked directly at the man before him.

“Is there really no other way?”

“What do you want?”

The words came out of his mouth haltingly.

“The other people…”

Seo Juhyeok laughed as if he was dumbfounded. Ilyeong’s ears burned at the expected reaction.

“It’s a contradiction. You act so coldly calculating towards me, but now you want to save other people. I didn’t know Mr. Kwon Ilyeong was a man with such a great sense of duty. Tell me. Are you originally the type to be so generous to others?”

“…It’s not like that.”

“Or have you been doing this since a while ago to deliberately test my patience?”

“That’s… not it either.”

“If it’s neither this nor that, then stop pushing it before I really regret this. Just taking Mr. Kwon Ilyeong with me is making my head feel like it’s about to split, thinking about dealing with the aftermath.”

It did not seem to be an empty threat, as Seo Juhyeok closed and opened his eyes with a groan. And though he picked up the pile of papers on the table again, he did not seem to have the leisure to look at them. In the end, he placed the documents face down and focused on pressing the spot between his eyebrows.

The fingertips of Ilyeong, who was holding the tissues, also trembled slightly.

“You said the carrier pigeon with Colonel Jamie Moore was also a lottery winner. The soldier I met here also bragged several times about his safety being guaranteed in Paradise. If I ignore your words and leave this room, will something happen to me too?”

Without removing the hand pressing on his brow, Seo Juhyeok narrowed his eyes. The eyes visible between his fingers were as dark as if he were peeking into a cave.

Did I misspeak when there are ears to listen? He glanced at the woman who had been on pins and needles beside him the whole time, but Seo Juhyeok did not seem to pay her any mind, his gaze fixed only on Ilyeong.

This was the first time his mind had been this calm while speaking of death. They exchanged gazes for a very long time in the suffocating silence. Seo Juhyeok seemed to be choosing his words carefully before letting out a low sigh.

Ann, who had been silent without even making a sound beside him the whole time, called out, “Young master.” She was a woman who knew with uncanny precision when to withdraw.

When Seo Juhyeok nodded, Ann stepped back again, holding the clump of tissues. Her anxious gaze swept over Ilyeong’s entire body until the door closed. The blatant stare also seemed to resent him, as if asking why he kept provoking Seo Juhyeok’s temper. Perhaps she thought the moment this door closed, a second round would begin.

Click. As the nuisance disappeared, Seo Juhyeok turned his gaze back to Ilyeong.

“There is no answer I can give you.”

Ilyeong froze instantly. Seo Juhyeok’s eyes narrowed.

“Mr. Kwon Ilyeong, I never thought you were a very expressive person… It seems I was mistaken.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I mean, it’s so obvious in your eyes that you want to stab me to death right now.”

“Don’t make assumptions. More importantly, what do you mean there’s no answer you can give me?”

Force entered Ilyeong’s voice on its own, raising its pitch. A great shock, as if his throat were tearing, followed, but he paid it no mind. Seo Juhyeok took a moment, as if observing his expression, before opening his mouth. The signs of fatigue were evident.

“Literally, I don’t know what will happen if you leave this room. The lottery has always been managed exclusively by my father and my brother.”

“Then you, Mr. Seo Juhyeok…”

“I’m the child who is thoroughly ostracized by the family. There are plenty of people around me who are itching to kick me out of Paradise. They probably would have all welcomed me with open arms if I had returned as a corpse after fighting the rebels.”

“…”

Was that why Seo Juhyeok was trying so hard to act like a scoundrel? To return to Paradise, and so, to take revenge when everyone let their guard down. The face of Seo Juhyeok as he told that story was simply emotionless.

“Why. Do you feel like you made a bad deal this time too? Like you’ve grabbed onto a rotten rope?”

“…I never thought that.”

“So you say.”

Seo Juhyeok picked up the bundle of documents from the table.

“The only remaining clue on this cruise ship is Colonel Jamie… but my hyung has trained the Colonel better than I thought. Judging by the fact that he absolutely won’t open his mouth even when he’s high on drugs, even when he’s being beaten in that state.”

Seo Juhyeok painted a gruesome picture in Ilyeong’s mind. Combined with what the carrier pigeon had said before, a rather detailed situation seemed to unfold before his eyes.

Colonel Jamie, tainted by Black, and the man who prods his cheek carelessly with the back of his hand, urging him to open his mouth…

A man in the form of the grim reaper.

He did not know why the dream he had in the slum came to mind at that moment. A shiver ran through his body, and a tension as if his blood were turning cold set in. To hide it, Ilyeong bit his lip firmly.

“That drug… it’s Black. Do you also use that drug, Mr. Seo Juhyeok?”

The lines of Seo Juhyeok’s eyes, which were fixed on Ilyeong, deepened.

“It feels like you’re asking because you already know something.”

Not to be outdone, Ilyeong also adjusted his tone of voice.

“All I have is what I’ve heard and inferred. I naturally found out about the drug called Black because I have White, and someone I know said that you, Mr. Seo Juhyeok, had a conversation with Colonel Jamie about a drug called Black.”

“Ah, the one called the carrier pigeon, was it.”

“You never intended to hide it anyway, did you. If you had, you wouldn’t have let Mr. Carrier Pigeon loose by my side in the first place. Or maybe you hoped I would hear all sorts of things from him and get scared, and so give up on Colonel Jamie.”

“Yes, that’s what I find most puzzling about Mr. Kwon Ilyeong. Why are you so stubborn when it comes to matters related to the Colonel when you’re so clever?”

“I’m under no obligation to answer that, am I.”

“Then listen and judge for yourself. I still have no intention of letting Mr. Kwon Ilyeong join my stage.”

His husky voice sounded menacing, like a clear threat.

“Black is on a different level from the drug Mr. Kwon Ilyeong has. Would you believe me if I told you that all the people in Paradise with a bit of money are crazy for that drug?”

“…”

“It’s not a simple narcotic. It’s… the fruit of knowledge, something you can’t quit once you’ve tasted it, even knowing it’s forbidden.”

The fruit of knowledge. The fruit from the Bible that, when eaten, allows one to know good and evil. Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden fell for the serpent’s temptation and took a bite of the forbidden fruit.

Seo Juhyeok’s metaphor was twofold. The fruit of knowledge allowed Adam and Eve to distinguish between good and evil, but in return, humanity committed the first original sin and learned of death. According to that metaphor, Black would ultimately bring pain to those who took it.

A quiet and very eerie realization slowly suffocated Ilyeong.

Seo Juhyeok, unlike the others, was not simply taking Black for recreation. Knowing that this drug would eventually make Paradise sick…

“That play you mentioned, Mr. Seo Juhyeok, Black is part of it, isn’t it.”

He received his answer in silence. If so, did that make him, the one who made Paradise sick with that fruit of knowledge, the cunning serpent? Now Ilyeong was both a sewer rat and a serpent.

The Adam before him delivered the final verdict.

“More precisely, it’s the root of it. Who on earth is the serpent that made Paradise sick with the fruit of knowledge. Where it’s hiding. Everyone is frantically searching for it.”

“Why…”

“Well. There must be people who want to use the serpent to sit on a pile of money, and there must be people who want to seize the enemy’s weakness. Their goals may all be different, but the most fundamental reason is one.”

Without taking his eyes off Ilyeong, Seo Juhyeok finished his words while rubbing his lower lip.

“Because without that drug, we are all half-dead.”

His heart beat rapidly, as if a stimulant had been injected into every corner of his blood vessels. His whole body tingled. He had to make a great effort to control his voice so it would not crack.

“Then which side are you on, Mr. Seo Juhyeok?”

“I am the exact opposite of them.”

If I hold your life in my hands, if I create the medicine for you, then wouldn’t our relationship become a bit simpler than it is now? He had entertained such a hope for a moment, but Seo Juhyeok was always an unpredictable man whose actions defied expectation.

“Because I intend to strike the loathsome neck of that serpent to kill everyone. So that it can’t fall into anyone’s hands. I told you, didn’t I? That I will mercilessly push all the actors I put on my stage down below. Even if it’s an act that chips away at my own life.”

Ah… a sigh-like lament burst out. Ilyeong pretended to rub his eyes and washed his face. He tried desperately to control his expression, but he could not know how he looked.

In the eyes of the man who burned with a desire for revenge, even to the point of betting his own life, lingered the same wretched light he had once seen at the restaurant.

Ilyeong met that gaze, which made one’s insides ache and feel lonely just by looking at it, in silence for a while. Though all he could do was bitterly realize the fact that they could never understand each other. Seo Juhyeok burst out into a hollow laugh.

“It seems I’ve really fallen head over heels for Mr. Kwon Ilyeong. To be talking about all this.”

As if to clear his head, he took another cigarette from the pack and put it in his mouth without hesitation. Then, contrary to the expectation that he would light it right away, he just kept flicking the Zippo lighter.

“I know you hate me so much that you won’t want to believe anything I say, but…”

Seo Juhyeok paused for a moment before continuing.

“If this lottery really is a ticket to hell, I am sincere in wanting to save Mr. Kwon Ilyeong.”

“…”

“Whether you’re acting or putting on a facade, just stick by my side. I’m going to take you to the banquet as my partner, and I plan to make an impression so that no one can touch you. No matter how I think about it, there’s no safer way than that.”

Now, Seo Juhyeok’s gaze was calm. The rage, like a wave swept away by a rough storm, was no longer there. Ilyeong barely managed to part his lips, fumbling for words.

“Then, when you said earlier that you were prepared to ruin the plan you’d waited ten years for…”

“It sounds like you’re worried, so I don’t feel bad. Did you calculate this too?”

He hid his hand with silence. Seo Juhyeok smiled bitterly.

“The plan will have to be revised. If my hyung finds out I’ve been poking around the lottery, he’ll be more wary and ostracize me. Maybe… I might have to wait a little longer until the time comes again.”

Ilyeong tried to read a hint of regret in his nonchalant words.

He was Seo Juhyeok’s variable. He had become the brake for the man who had been charging forward, single-mindedly driven by revenge.

“You don’t need to look at it that way. I still think it’s a cheap price to pay compared to the value of Mr. Kwon Ilyeong’s life. I made the choice, so it’s only natural that I bear the consequences, isn’t it?”

“…Wouldn’t it have been easier if you had just pretended not to know me?”

“I wasn’t capable of such rational judgment.”

Two dark eyes, from which no emotion could be read, looked directly at Ilyeong.

“I’m not blaming you, so relax your expression. Even I didn’t expect to lose control like this. That itself must mean that I’ve become the loser in this tiresome emotional battle.”

It was the sound announcing the end of the war. Did it even make sense to decide a winner and a loser when no one had gained anything? Ilyeong bit his lip. Seo Juhyeok placed the Zippo lighter he had been fiddling with, click, click, right on the table.

“You asked me earlier if I regretted it. Should I ask you too? Do you regret it, Mr. Kwon Ilyeong?”

The question, which had no object, brought back memories from the cruise ship.

Kissing Seo Juhyeok on the deck, telling him the memories of the slum in the restaurant, weighing his heart and using it as a bargaining chip. And even this moment now, when everything had become twisted.

Ilyeong opened his lips as if possessed.

“…No, I don’t regret it.”

Even if he could go back, he would make the same choice. It was the first conviction he had encountered in a life that had been nothing but regret at every moment. Seo Juhyeok made a strange face, as if he was smiling but not quite.

“Yes, that’s enough.”

Ilyeong stared at him intently. It was not easy to gauge where Seo Juhyeok currently stood, somewhere between truth and lies. This time, he met his eyes clearly and murmured.

“Then this is the end. There will be no going back to how we were before.”

Ilyeong felt like he knew that, while everything else was ambiguous, those words at least were sincere.

Seo Juhyeok simply broke the cigarette he had been holding in his mouth. The cigarette, its back broken, was left abandoned on the paper.

On his face, washed clean of the emotion he had refused to name regret until the very end, only the usual perfect mask remained.

“…So, does Mr. Kwon Ilyeong still wish to refuse my offer?”

He had returned to his polite manner of speaking, but the tone it carried was dry. Ilyeong realized he was drawing a line. As he faced the familiar yet unfamiliar face, his throat suddenly tightened.

What did Seo Juhyeok want from him? Did he want him to readily accept the kindness and affection he offered and become completely on his side? If so… should he consider himself fortunate to have disappointed him now? Since he would never be on his side for his entire life.

If he were to give his heart to Seo Juhyeok, all that would be left for him would be a bitter betrayal, and death. Because he would be killed by that hand someday. He refused to become any more miserable.

The thought that a man who had everything would covet even his heart was nothing but greed. A base sense of defeat boiled in his mind. Because he lacked nothing, he desired things like another person’s sincerity. What was left for him was a fierce life of just weighing life and death. He did not want to cram anything else into his bursting head.

In the midst of it all, a thought suddenly occurred to him. Would such a moment ever come for him? A moment when he would want to possess Seo Juhyeok’s heart completely… a moment like that.

That would be the sign that he had truly reached the end of the line. Thinking that he was having all sorts of useless thoughts, Ilyeong erased his bitter smile and faced him.

“I refuse.”

This choice was the best for both of them right now. If Seo Juhyeok could read that he was thinking this, he might scoff at him for being calculating again.

In any case, it was the answer he had decided on from the moment he knew that the life jacket he had prepared was only for one person. Rather than surviving alone now, being tormented by the apparitions of the carrier pigeon and the other sewer rats, and living with his blood running dry, wondering when he would be pushed off a cliff by his hand, he would seek another way. Now that he knew how he felt about Black, his side could never be a safe haven.

They made eye contact for a long time in the silence. He still had an expression of incomprehension.

“Then it’s a losing game for you, Mr. Kwon Ilyeong.”

“Consider it my final service to you, Mr. Seo Juhyeok.”

“Your choice of words is merciless to the very end.”

Seo Juhyeok twisted his lips into a smile.

“There might not be any other way besides taking my hand.”

“I know. I might regret it.”

“When that time comes, I won’t be taking Doctor Kwon’s hand again.”

“That, too… I understand.”

Understand. He muttered the word once and leaned back against the sofa. No words followed after that.

Interpreting it as the end of the war of nerves, Ilyeong gathered his things that were scattered on the floor. While he packed his duffel bag and clothes, Juhyeok did not open his mouth once.

When he straightened up, he saw him staring at the ceiling with his neck tilted back. His fingers tapped on the table and the armrest. He tried to guess what he was thinking, but then gave up. From now on, he would stop trying so hard to get inside Seo Juhyeok’s head.

Ilyeong hesitated for a moment in front of the door, pondering the right words.

“…Well then, I’ll be going.”

He thought the phrase he had chosen for his final farewell was excessively dry and awkward, but nothing else came to mind. Until now, Ilyeong had always been the one running away, leaving his opponent behind him. He had never had a normal parting like this. No, considering he had given a blowjob as a parting gift, perhaps this too was a separation that deviated from the standards of ordinary people.

It was when he had taken his eyes off the still unresponsive man and grabbed the doorknob.

“Mr. Kwon Ilyeong.”

A low call held him back. When he turned around, Seo Juhyeok was staring at him intently, all traces of his earlier languor gone.

“A moment ago. Was it true when you said it felt familiar?”

Ilyeong let out a short laugh. Thinking that Seo Juhyeok’s final words were truly unpredictable. He hesitated between the answer he probably wanted to hear, and the honest answer, before opening his mouth.

“Yes. It’s true.”

Seo Juhyeok’s eyes were calm. With a face that showed no trace of agitation, he continued as if sighing.

“Well, that’s… quite a blow.”

A lie. He knew better than anyone that words like that could not leave a single scratch on his heart. Ilyeong grabbed the doorknob and walked out of the room.

*

“Hah.”

After exiting Seo Juhyeok’s bedroom, Ilyeong leaned his back against the closed door for a moment and collected his thoughts. Thump, thump. He closed his eyes, lightly bumping the back of his head against the door.

Was it the right choice? No, what was he even saying? This was a completely insane choice. To refuse Seo Juhyeok’s offer because the other sewer rats were on his mind. Seo Juhyeok had not been wrong. Uncharacteristically… A hollow laugh escaped him. Nevertheless, the fact that he still had no thought of opening this door again and begging to be saved, even if it was just him alone, must mean that he had truly repented.

Joo Yoonchae would laugh her head off if she knew. Suddenly, he yearned for Joo Yoonchae’s cackling laughter. I must really be about to die, getting all sentimental like this.

Suddenly, he remembered the words he had spoken as a joke to her before boarding the cruise ship, when she had said she did not know what to say.

“Wouldn’t it help a bit if you imagine that I’m dying?”

Was he smiling when he said that? Not knowing that it would become a prophecy aimed at his own throat. Idiot.

He would not regret it. He decided to follow Seo Juhyeok’s motto. It seemed that was the only way to soothe his empty heart. That one line was enough of what he had received from Seo Juhyeok.

Ilyeong opened his eyes and checked the clock hanging on the opposite wall. 6:30. As expected, he was late. Just as a sigh escaped him, he sensed a presence beside him.

“Where is the young master?”

Only then did he realize he was not alone. Ann was standing next to him with anxious eyes. She was still holding a tailor’s tape measure. He thought she was a person with a remarkable sense of professionalism. He could understand why the Seo family liked this woman. Apart from that, however, the way she kept glancing at his mouth was unpleasant.

Ilyeong moved away from the door and gestured with his chin towards the bedroom where Seo Juhyeok would be.

“He’s inside.”

“Then, the partner…”

“We decided not to. More importantly, I’m sorry you had to hear things you shouldn’t have.”

When he smiled sweetly, Ann’s face turned as red as a carrot. So she had heard everything after all. A bit of nausea rose in him at the thought of having broadcast his moans and fights live to the woman in front of him. Both he and Seo Juhyeok needed to learn to control their tempers.

Since the awkwardness was mutual, he simply gave a slight nod and started walking towards the entrance. From behind him, he heard the sound of Ann hesitating as if to stop him, then entering the room. He could not hear any conversation.

“Oh, why are you coming out alone?”

Before he could even enjoy the sweet smell unique to the cruise ship out in the hallway, he ran into a detestable face. Aiden narrowed his eyes behind his glasses and stared at Ilyeong’s features, especially around his mouth.

“I was wondering why you were a little late…”

A clear sneer was attached to the end of his trailing words. Only then did he realize what a state he was in. His hair was matted with semen and sweat, and his lips were tinged with blood. Anyone would think he had just finished fucking Seo Juhyeok. It was not for nothing that Ann had looked at him with strange eyes that were half-worried and half-shocked.

Ilyeong nervously wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and just walked past him. No, he tried to. He would have done so if Aiden had not immediately blocked his way.

“You acted all high and mighty, talking about how a single leaf can block the view, so is this your ending, Mr. Kwon Ilyeong? I told you. If you act up, trusting in Lieutenant Colonel Seo, you’ll be thrown out like an old shoe. That’s exactly what you look like right now.”

“Move.”

“Seeing you come out alone in that state, I can pretty much guess what happened. Did the Lieutenant Colonel get tired of you now?”

Ilyeong stopped dead in his tracks, his expression blank. Aiden, who had been smiling playfully, widened his eyes when Ilyeong showed no reaction.

“No way. Did you, Mr. Kwon Ilyeong, reject the Lieutenant Colonel?”

“…”

“Haha. This is hilarious and interesting in its own way. Why did you do that? No, no. I do have an inkling. You’ve finally realized the reality of the situation. Yes, no matter what, you and the Lieutenant Colonel were never a good match.”

The face of the man, who was going crazy with delight, flushed with excitement. Ilyeong slowly opened his mouth. Although his exterior feigned composure, his insides were thoroughly twisted.

“What reality are you talking about?”

“No matter how you look at it, it was a proposition where the Lieutenant Colonel was at a loss. Do you know what it means to attend as the Lieutenant Colonel’s partner?”

“What is it?”

“For a man who is being mentioned as the next leader to designate a man, and a refugee area nobody at that, as his partner for an official event. This is something that would turn Paradise upside down. It’s just giving them a pretext to be attacked in the sibling rivalry.”

Aiden jeered and shrugged his shoulders.

“I’m actually a little grateful to you, Mr. Kwon Ilyeong, for making the right choice, even if it’s a bit late.”

He had forgotten to tell Seo Juhyeok one thing. He should have advised him to stay away from this man, even if he would be called presumptuous. While Ilyeong let out a short laugh, Aiden continued.

“I don’t know if you’ll believe me or not, but I already predicted all of this. That if it was Doctor Kwon, he would refuse Lieutenant Colonel Seo’s offer. The Lieutenant Colonel probably couldn’t understand you, right?”

“…”

“Don’t be disheartened. The Lieutenant Colonel doesn’t understand people like us. Ah… now that I say it, it’s a bit upsetting to lump myself in the same group as Doctor Kwon. But anyway, in his eyes, we’d all look the same.”

It was all bullshit. How could this man possibly know something that even he himself had not been sure of until right before he left the room? He was about to ignore the ridiculous sophistry and walk past, but Aiden blocked his way once again. Ilyeong looked at him coolly.

“I’ve told you to move twice.”

“What’s the matter? Now that I think this is the end, I’m starting to feel a little affectionate towards us. But that state you’re in, did Lieutenant Colonel Seo really do that? Seeing it with my own eyes gives it a different feel. The Lieutenant Colonel didn’t have a hobby of sleeping with men.”

“Will you understand if I say it a third time?”

“You’re really not easy. You’re definitely not my type. Let’s relax a bit. Huh?”

Aiden pretended to brush off Ilyeong’s shoulder, pat, pat, as if doing him a favor, then took a handkerchief out from his pocket. And with refined elegance, he painstakingly wiped each of his fingers. As if they had touched something filthy.

“Lastly, I was so grateful for the advice you gave me earlier, Mr. Kwon Ilyeong. May I give you one too?”

“It’s not like you won’t do it if I say I don’t want to hear it.”

“Hmm. I’ll take that as permission and go ahead.”

He smiled broadly, revealing all his teeth.

“You’ll come to regret it if you act up clumsily when you have nothing to your name. Just like right now. If you want to teach someone, build up your strength first. If you had really become the Lieutenant Colonel’s partner, the situation would be different now. But the you of now, who has nothing, is not scary at all.”

“You…”

“You can go now. I feel so refreshed.”

Haha… a smile lingered on Ilyeong’s lips. While he and Seo Juhyeok were inside the cabin, Aiden must have been outside, grinding his teeth, wanting to say this. The people of Paradise were all so detestable. A solid iron bar was erected in his prejudice.

“Why are you just standing there? Hurry up. Unless you want to advertise that you just came from fucking a man, you should probably wash up before going to the banquet, shouldn’t you?”

Aiden turned his thick shoulders and stood aside at an angle, urging him to pass.

Instead of taking a step, Ilyeong let the strength drain from his arms. The duffel bag and clothes he was holding spilled onto the carpet with a clatter. Through the fabric, he heard the loud sound of a tin case clashing.

After pushing the duffel bag aside with the tip of his foot, he took a large step towards Aiden, trampling on the clothes that had fallen to the floor. The clothes were rags to begin with, so a few more footprints would not make much of a difference. No, the dirtier, the better.

Standing like that, he gauged the eye level with Aiden. Since they were of similar height, he did not feel much of a difference in eye level even while standing on a few thin pieces of clothing.

The problem was the build.

Ilyeong lowered his gaze and sized up Aiden’s body. The muscular body, which must have been toned with a healthy diet and moderate exercise, was clearly outlined under his clothes. When the distance between them suddenly closed, Aiden wrinkled his nose, showing his displeasure.

“What are you doing now?”

When he looked up, Aiden’s face was directly in front of him. They were so close that he could see every single one of his trembling eyelashes. When he tilted his head slightly as if to kiss him, Aiden flinched and took a step back.

What a coward. Even if you offered someone like you to me, I wouldn’t take you, it would make me sick. The glasses were quite thick, he thought. The hallway quickly became so quiet that he could hear Aiden swallowing dryly.

“What on earth are you…”

Unable to bear the tension, Aiden mumbled with a flushed face. Only then did Ilyeong quietly rotate his wrist and take another step back. Then, he nonchalantly bent down to pick up the clothes and opened his mouth.

“Where is the restroom?”

“The restroom?”

Aiden, who repeated the out-of-the-blue question, immediately shut his mouth. Ilyeong sneered silently, as he could clearly feel him trying to figure out what his scheme was for asking such a thing when there was a cabin right next to them. The clothes, clearly marked with footprints, felt gritty against his fingers.

“Hah…”

Ilyeong took a deep breath, straightened his back, and swung his arm wide, striking Aiden’s face with the clothes. Swish. A loud friction sound, like a wave hitting the hull of a ship, was heard.

“What, ugh, aaack!”

Taking advantage of the moment his opponent’s vision was blocked and he was defenseless, Ilyeong swung his fist wide. He felt his fist sink heavily into the cheekbone, faintly grazing the bridge of the nose at the same time.

Next, timing it for when Aiden was pulling the clothes away, he landed a punch on his bare face as well. This time, he must have hit his nose properly, as he could feel the bone crack and shift. The impact must have been significant, as Aiden clutched his nose and bent over.

“Fuck, Doctor Kwon, ugh, fuck!”

Ilyeong followed up by kicking him in the stomach with all his might.

“Aaack!”

Letting out another scream, Aiden rolled on the carpet. Ilyeong, with the duffel bag slung over his shoulder, leisurely enjoyed the spectacle before him.

Aiden soon identified the clothes that had covered his face and began to retch. This was the man who had been having low-grade fantasies while looking at the dust-covered clothes and the semen-covered face.

With a look on his face as if he had been covered in filth, Aiden screamed.

“Doctor Kwon, are you really crazy?! How dare you hit me?!”

Cough. Aiden propped himself up on the carpet with both arms and drooled. Now that he looked, his nose was bleeding too, and the hand he had hastily used to cover his face was soaked in blood. In a pathetic state where he could not even properly lift his face, Aiden spouted ridiculous words about how he would kill Ilyeong or not let him get away with it.

“Hey.”

At Ilyeong’s sudden informal speech, his head snapped up as if he could not believe his ears.

“I told you to stop messing with me.”

“Hey? Did you just say hey to me?”

“It’s the same old routine, I’m so sick of it.”

At this point, Nam Kiyoon, who had insisted he use informal speech, and Seo Juhyeok, who had said it did not matter if he used informal speech, seemed like mutants from Paradise. Strictly speaking, the former was from the slum, though.

Ilyeong shook his head and tapped his thigh area with the tip of his foot.

“This doesn’t deviate from expectations either. Do people from Paradise have some kind of collective sexual perversion?”

The front of Aiden’s pants was half-bulging. There were strange people everywhere who derived pleasure from crushing others. And unfortunately for him, they were mostly around him.

Aiden’s face turned bright red and he curled up his body. He fumed, not knowing what to do with his anger, and then ground his teeth so hard it made a sound.

“Doctor Kwon… are you really crazy? How are you going to deal with the consequences? Huh? Are you just going all out now?”

“Yes. You keep messing with me because you’re scared of Seo Juhyeok but you think I’m a pushover. It’s the same for me. I’m scared of Seo Juhyeok, and you’re a pushover. There are so many people around me who make my life miserable that I’m not scared of someone like you at all. I’d rather be scared of a sewer rat than you.”