In This Life I Will Die as an Actress Not a Villainess Chapter 76

The first thing that caught my eye was the dramatically increased fan cafe membership.

I read the number slowly, amazed.

“It’s more than doubled…?”

There’d been plenty of noise from controversy, but the simultaneous release of the movie and drama seemed to have brought in a surge of fans.

I scrolled down to check the uploaded posts.

‘Notice: Everyone please be careful with spoilers. This is our actor’s precious work.’

‘Desert Island Review Thread—Insane Edition’

‘Desert Island Real-Time Reactions from Other Communities’

The fans were working harder on promotion than I was.

When I checked other communities too, fans and Desert Island viewers alike were posting notices pleading with people not to spoil.

It was an issue I hadn’t thought about from my end.

Netmate had chosen an incredibly bold strategy by taking on spoiler risks too.

I closed the laptop and let out a long exhale.

The tension that had been climbing all the way to my head finally subsided.

That’s when my phone rang.

It was the Netmate employee who’d been handling our meetings.

‘Sena-ssi, Sena-ssi! I’m letting you know before the article goes up. We just passed 100,000 views!’

The moment I answered, the employee started talking rapid-fire. Hearing that, I shot up from my seat.

“What?!”

100,000…?

Sweat broke out behind my neck.

‘They’re mostly concentrated in the metro area and younger demographics, but the first month free service and releasing all episodes really worked well. We’ll probably lose a lot of people once Desert Island’s popularity fades, but this is way higher profits than we expected.’

“Yes, congratulations! Make sure to quickly capture viewers with the other dramas you’re producing now.”

The employee on the other end laughed heartily.

‘Sena-ssi, you’ve got a new nickname around the company. They’re calling you Netmate’s daughter.’

“What?”

The moment I heard that, I burst out laughing too.

‘Sena-ssi, you went through a lot. Taking on everything and even getting cursed at. We’ll upload the documentary at the right time soon. I’ll personally make sure to clear away whatever doubts are still hanging around about you.’

There was a firmness in that voice, a solid determination.

That made me laugh again.

“Thank you.”

‘We’re the ones who should thank you. Have a great time at the Hanho ceremony.’

With that, the call ended.

I slid into my chair.

One final highlight remained.

* * *

A week later, standing on the red carpet as always—still unfamiliar territory.

The early evening air felt chilly.

Reporters swarmed like clouds, their cameras flashing nonstop.

I endured the blinding white light spreading before my eyes and smiled.

As last year’s Rookie of the Year winner, this year I also had to participate as a presenter for the Rookie Award.

To think I’d be giving out an award to someone else.

It was something I’d never experienced before.

Fun, but nerve-wracking too.

What if I mess up my words?

I’d found it hard to understand when I saw presenters looking more nervous than the award recipients, but now I finally got how they must have felt.

One disappointing thing was that Kkotbyeol wasn’t among the Best New Actress nominees.

Even if she got nominated, it would probably be next year.

And I wouldn’t be the presenter then, which felt a bit disappointing inside.

After finishing the greetings and leaving the stage, heading toward the presenters’ waiting room…

Someone called out to me from behind with a sharp voice.

“Hey.”

When I turned around, there stood Lee Nara in a white dress studded with dazzling crystal decorations, one hand on her hip.

As if she’d caught me at the perfect moment.

“Look who’s playing queen bee now.”

At that blatant attack, I found myself at a loss for words.

Why are there so many rude people in this world?

“Hello, sunbaenim.”

“Do I look fine to you?”

Even speaking informally to me.

I’d lived decades longer than Lee Nara.

I pushed down the heat rising inside me.

“Does sunbaenim think I suit being a queen?”

“What?”

“You called me a queen bee.”

I answered coolly.

Then the area below Lee Nara’s neck, where foundation hadn’t been applied, turned slightly red.

Does she get red when she’s angry?

“And about queen bees, sunbaenim—you know when they’re attacked, hundreds of worker bees swarm the attacker and go on the offensive, right?”

Lee Nara’s brow furrowed with a bewildered expression.

“What, now that you’ve made it a bit you think you can act tough relying on your fans or whatever?”

Fans or whatever.

“I wouldn’t say relying so much as trusting them. Whenever things like this happen…”

In one sentence, my side was used to this kind of absurd situation.

Lee Nara couldn’t continue.

“Congratulations on being nominated for Best Actress. See you later.”

As I passed by her…

Lee Nara finally crossed the line.

“You slept with those directors, didn’t you?”

“…”

Hearing that, I stopped in place.

I turned back to stare at Lee Nara’s face.

Lee Nara kept running her mouth.

“I didn’t know Kang Jeonghwan and Hwangbo Jaejoon were so weak for young girls. You’re quite something. So who are you sleeping with this time?”

Endure it, Han Sena.

Grab this mutt’s hair right now and everything goes down the drain.

“That’s a new audition method I’m hearing about. I’m skilled enough that I don’t need to resort to those methods yet. Actually, sunbaenim, you…”

I let my words trail off.

“What, you crazy bitch?!”

Lee Nara shrieked loud enough to echo through the hallway.

I looked around exaggeratedly and went “shh,” gesturing for her to be quiet.

Lee Nara clamped her mouth shut, fists trembling.

People with a lot to lose tend to be cowards.

So why are types like this fearless?

Is it because they’re blockheads?

“Since we’re talking about queen bees—you should maintain some dignity, sunbaenim. You’re the queen bee of a much bigger swarm than me, aren’t you?”

I shot her a bright smile before opening the waiting room door, walking in, and slamming it shut.

Beyond the door, the sound of Lee Nara’s heated footsteps stomped away furiously.

But from inside the waiting room, someone was giggling quietly.

Startled, I looked in that direction.

It was Seo Jaeyeon.

“Are you actually insane?”

Seo Jaeyeon asked with a face that looked thoroughly entertained.

“Ah… sorry.”

At my response, Seo Jaeyeon’s eyes widened.

“Sorry? For what?”

“You’re friends with her.”

Then Seo Jaeyeon laughed again.

“Can’t you tell the difference between friends and colleagues?”

So they weren’t friends…?

Plus, I’d assumed they were close since they’d been negotiating appearance fees together, but looking back, Lee Nara hadn’t been at that gathering with Lee Seokhyun and Seo Jaeyeon.

I remember feeling briefly puzzled about it.

Seo Jaeyeon spoke as if reading my mind.

“Not friends, and she can’t even come to our gatherings. Two years ago she leaked Minhui’s dating scandal.”

“…?”

She’s even crazier than she looks.

“Minhui’s got a temper too. She wouldn’t want to grab her hair in front of cameras, would she?”

Seo Jaeyeon’s makeup team in the back didn’t even pretend to listen, like they were used to it.

“But still, be careful. Lee Nara’s got a screw loose too. You’ve been having a rough time lately. Of course you crushed the controversy with your skills, but. She’s vicious.”

Seo Jaeyeon smiled slightly.

“No matter what, if you get hit with media play one more time, you’ll be completely branded as weird.”

Hearing that, I nodded.

I couldn’t read Seo Jaeyeon’s intentions at all.

She was clearly ruthless herself, but she’d been helping me out since last time—why?

“Thank you. But why have you been helping me since last time…?”

At my question, Seo Jaeyeon stood up and answered.

“I’ve got this condition where I can’t hang out with stupid people. Spending time with them makes me want to curse, and thorns grow in my mouth.”

“…”

Roughly translated: she didn’t think I was stupid.

“Smart people are rare in this industry. Smart people who also act well and have a good face are even rarer. And such rare people deserve to be treated properly.”

I was internally shocked.

Was that just now a compliment?

It was a communication style I’d never heard or seen in my forty-some years of life.

“So you know you’re valuable and act like it. Conduct yourself well.”

After finishing, Seo Jaeyeon opened the door and left.

I slowly sat down in a chair and thought while looking in the mirror.

The true queen bee was Seo Jaeyeon.

* * *

Behind the stage.

After finishing presenting the Male and Female Rookie Awards, Choi Hyeongmin approached me in a friendly manner.

“The dress is cold, isn’t it?”

He’d been last year’s Best New Actor winner, and an actor who’d slapped me multiple times in a morning drama in my past life.

You punk, seeing you after so long and you’re playing gentleman.

Just as I was trying to recover some lost faith in humanity after Lee Nara…

“Keep holding my arm. I’m pretty warm.”

“Ah, no thanks. Thank you, sunbaenim.”

“Hey, ‘sunbaenim’ is too stiff. Call me oppa. And give me your number later too, yeah?”

Ugh…

I almost cursed out loud.

Exhausting, so exhausting.

I forced a smile and ignored him, hurrying toward the dressing room.

A moment later, after changing from the awards ceremony dress into a hanbok dress, I sat in my seat.

“Now, the Best Actress award. <Stone Wall Road> Lee Nara, <Flower Over Palace Walls> Han Sena, <Worst Partners> Song Yeoseon, <Love Odyssey> Woo Jeonghui, <Thrill Lover> Yoo Hyeon.”

As each nominated actor was introduced on screen, footage from their dramas played.

From works with good ratings, to works that were so-so but where the actor’s performance alone was recognized, to works with outstanding quality but low viewership.

Seeing the various actresses’ faces across different projects stirred something inside me.

Especially when Lee Nara’s passionate performance in her drama played out.

Though it had been a bit touch-and-go, it was a work that claimed the number one spot for terrestrial Monday-Tuesday dramas, about leads with severe germophobia and OCD overcoming their inner afflictions to find love.

Compared to Lee Nara’s filmography so far, it had generated slightly less buzz.

“Congratulations, Han Sena-ssi!”

Applause poured down from behind me.

Lee Seokhyun, sitting next to me, got even more excited than I was, jumping up and throwing both arms in the air.

Laughter burst out from the audience.

Thanks to Lee Seokhyun, I stood up cheerfully and headed to the stage.

I received the trophy and bouquet from the presenter.

Then I stood at the microphone and cleared my throat.

“I’m happy to receive this award multiple times for <Flower Over Palace Walls>. This award goes to all the nominated actors. And to our Palace Flower team, whom no amount of thanks will ever be enough—I hope we can meet again on another project.”

From far away, I could see each face of the actors I’d worked with on Palace Flower, crystal clear.

“Lastly, I dedicate this award to all the warriors who, like Sunim, cannot stay where they wish, who face rejection and fight against reality. Thank you.”

I came down from the stage as applause poured out once more.

After sitting down, I clasped hands with Won Hyerim sunbaenim.

The very next category was the ceremony’s highlight—the Grand Prize.

The Hanho Grand Prize was famous for giving awards regardless of whether you were supporting or lead cast.

Won Hyerim sunbaenim had been nominated for the Grand Prize.

At the last NBS ceremony too, sunbaenim had been nominated for Best Supporting Actress.

But she’d lost to a veteran actor known as ‘the NBS mom actress.’

Having watched sunbaenim’s acting up close for months, I’d felt disappointed on her behalf.

Somehow I felt more nervous than when my own name was being called.

I’d never wished this hard for my own award.

When I glanced sideways, the entire Palace Flower team looked anxious just like me.

Only Won Hyerim sunbaenim wore a composed expression.

The MC dragged out the time before introducing the Grand Prize nominees.

One by one, actors who’d delivered truly masterful performances across movies and dramas throughout the year were introduced.

A position where just being nominated was an honor.

There were actors I was seeing again after a long time since my past life, and actors so distant in memory I couldn’t recall them.

Sitting in the same space as those actors made me feel like I was dreaming.

“Now, we’ll announce the winner.”

I clenched both fists tight.