The Unbelievers Chapter 45

“Pardon?”

“I saw you two before, and you seemed to be on good terms. I heard you talking on speakerphone. I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop, it just happened.”

“Ah…”

Choi Jungeon would call occasionally when he got bored while studying. Eunseong, who had switched to speakerphone because he was in the middle of a game, would give him half-hearted responses.

“It’s natural to like someone.”

“…He’s a boy, though?”

“I don’t have prejudices like that.”

“I don’t like him.”

He didn’t know what the man was trying to say, but he disliked the intention behind it for no particular reason.

“Didn’t the two of you like each other?”

“Why would I like him? He’s not my style… and you have no idea how much he swears.”

Eunseong took out his irritation on his chopsticks pointlessly. He couldn’t understand why Yoo Siun was suddenly bringing up Choi Jungeon. Furthermore, he hated that Siun misunderstood and thought Eunseong liked Choi Jungeon.

“I heard he’s a good student.”

“I dislike people who swear. Jungeon swears every time he opens his mouth. And he even hit me in the past. On the day I first met you, Mister. We’re only on slightly better terms now because we go to different schools. He’s the type who does whatever he feels like, so you never know what he’ll do.”

Eunseong wanted to tattle about the things Choi Jungeon almost did to him, but he couldn’t predict how Yoo Siun would react if he heard that, so he didn’t go that far.

“…He’s not the one?”

“He’s not.”

The one Eunseong liked was someone else. Because that very person was bringing up a completely irrelevant individual and asking if he liked him, Eunseong felt like his chest was going to burst from frustration.

“I’ve made you angry again.”

“You are really… like a fool, Mister.”

“Yes, it seems so.”

“I don’t even like Jungeon… really, like a fool.”

Eunseong held his spoon backward and poked at his rice bowl repeatedly. Since Siun didn’t ask anything further and just ate quietly, Eunseong also kept his mouth shut and finished dinner.

Once they had finished the meal and enough time had passed for digestion, they decided to go out for a run.

Wearing a black short-sleeved T-shirt, training pants, and a cap pulled low, Yoo Siun came out to the living room first and waited for Eunseong. Eunseong, who had been getting ready in advance, quickly opened his door and stepped out as soon as he heard signs of movement outside. Eunseong also wore exercise clothes that were black from top to bottom, following his lead.

“You don’t necessarily have to wear black.”

“It’s just that what you wear looks comfortable, Mister.”

“I only do it because I’m too lazy to choose. It would be better for you to wear more variety.”

“I’m also too lazy to choose clothes.”

“Shall we head out, then?”

After tying his shoelaces tightly, Eunseong followed him out. Outside, the two bodyguards who accompanied him on his runs were waiting, running in place as if warming up.

“Let’s go slowly.”

After speaking to the bodyguards, Yoo Siun began to run first, and Eunseong ran after him. The two bodyguards followed lightly behind them.

It was a speed at which he could feel that the man was running slowly on purpose for his sake. It was a pace Eunseong could comfortably keep up with. As they ran down the hill they usually traveled by car, a path leading to the forest appeared. The rainy season had ended, and the park was refreshing with summer weather.

Yoo Siun took the lead familiarly. They had only been running lightly for about ten minutes, yet Eunseong was already gasping for air. Although the speed of Yoo Siun running ahead was constant, Eunseong kept falling behind.

As he ran, Siun occasionally looked back to check on Eunseong’s condition. Seeing him keep up this far meant his physical strength wasn’t completely at rock bottom. Yoo Siun was the type who exercised at least five times a week, doing more than ten kilometers of running and weight training. If he didn’t do so, his work performance suffered. He had to handle dangerous tasks and, in an emergency, had to protect his own life. Now, he also had to take responsibility for Eunseong’s safety.

Yoo Siun ran slowly, matching his pace with Eunseong, who was gradually slowing down.

“Huff, puff, I, actually, gasp, huff, haa, at running, haa, hak, in the past, haa, was, huff, huff, pretty good.”

“Haa, do you want to rest a bit?”

“It’s only been ten minutes, haa, ran for ten minutes. Hauk, haa.”

“Relax your shoulders and neck, and swing your hands lightly.”

Unlike Yoo Siun, whose body was starting to loosen up and grow warm, Eunseong’s forehead and the nape of his neck were becoming damp with sweat.

Eunseong sped up, saying he could do it, that he could run more. Yoo Siun ran alongside him, keeping pace at Eunseong’s side. They ran and ran despite the exhaustion, and as they just kept running, his legs, which had felt heavy as if someone were pulling them from behind, became much lighter, and he found more strength to push off the ground.

“Haa, haa, whew, you run better than I thought.”

“Huff, huff, me? Of course, I’m good at running.”

How long had they been running?

Yoo Siun stopped running. Eunseong also stopped, breathing heavily. Sweat poured like rain down Eunseong’s face as he bent over with his hands on his knees, gasping for air.

“Haa, haa, my heart, my heart feels like, haa, it’s going to burst.”

As if feeling his violently pounding heartbeat, Eunseong placed a hand on his chest and tried to catch his breath. Suddenly, he wavered and leaned his forehead against Yoo Siun’s shoulder.

Yoo Siun, who had been brushing back his disheveled hair, flinched and stiffened. Since it was hard to stand upright on his own, Eunseong leaned his weight against Siun’s chest, rubbing his cheek and forehead against him in a gesture of grabbing onto whatever was nearby, as he calmed his breathing. If not for an excuse like this, Eunseong couldn’t even dream of touching him.

“Haa, haa, haauu… This is really hard. Running is, haa, actually much harder than I thought. Hak, hauk. I should have, haa, done some, exercise, haa, hauk, usually.”

“… .”

Yoo Siun remained still like a pillar so that Eunseong could lean on him, deadening his movements. Eunseong, who was rubbing his sweat-soaked face against Siun’s chest to wipe it, grabbed his arm. Yoo Siun’s arm was also wet with sweat and felt slippery.

Usually, he should have disliked the sensation of skin sticking together clammily, but he didn’t dislike it. Standing there while holding his arm, Eunseong wiped the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand.

“I underestimated running, haa, I’m dying.”

“… .”

Eunseong knew that he was uncomfortable. Even though he knew, he pretended not to and continued to lean. He shook both legs as if he would collapse if he wasn’t holding onto this.

It was a wrong emotion, something that shouldn’t be happening, but Eunseong used his forearm as a support and breathed out heavily, his breath refusing to settle.

“Haa, haa, what about you, Mister? How much do you usually run? How much did we run just now?”

“I’m not sure. About five kilometers.”

“How much do you run?”

“It would be a bit more than ten kilometers.”

“Then if we go back from here, we’ll have run about ten kilometers?”

“… .”

The arm that could feel sweat and heat slowly moved away. Unable to bear the discomfort, he had subtly pulled his arm away so as not to embarrass Eunseong. Eunseong raised his head with an awkward face and looked at Yoo Siun.

“Shall we run again? Can you run?”

“Pardon? Yes… yes. I can run.”

He could feel Yoo Siun strangely avoiding his eyes. Though the man had tried to keep a distance from him before, this was the first time he had shown such clear signs of discomfort, so Eunseong’s cheeks flushed red from embarrassment.

Yoo Siun ran first so that Eunseong couldn’t grab onto him. This time, he clearly opened up a gap and kept his distance. Eunseong felt as if his back were turning cold. The sweat that had broken out was washed away by the wind, and the heat that had been hotly enveloping his body vanished.

The two only exhaled roughly, returning the way they came without exchanging a single word of conversation. When they were going up the hill, Yoo Siun went ahead abruptly, leaving behind Eunseong, who had slowed down significantly and couldn’t keep up. Eunseong, who ran with the bodyguards until the end, entered the house alone, gasping for breath.

Yoo Siun was nowhere to be seen in the living room, perhaps having already gone to wash up. Eunseong also went into his room. He leaned his back against the door, exhaling as if his lungs would burst, and slumped down onto the floor. His breathing wouldn’t subside easily.

∞ ∞ ∞

Drinking his brewed coffee, Yoo Siun raised his wrist to check the time. Eunseong, who would always show his face in the morning even during vacation, had still not woken up.

He was ruminating on Eunseong’s behavior from yesterday.

It’s nonsense. It’s an impossible thing.

“… .”

It can’t be. He shook his head.

It was exactly as Manager Nam said. In the end, what he felt wasn’t a misunderstanding.

Eunseong was acting as if he liked him. While running yesterday evening, Eunseong showed expressions and behaviors that one could only show to someone they had feelings for. When talking about Choi Jungeon, he adamantly denied the relationship, as if asking why Siun didn’t recognize his true heart. While saying he didn’t like that boy, Eunseong watched Yoo Siun’s reaction intensely.

The act of leaving the house because he said he hated him, and the way he couldn’t hide his disappointment toward the man who tried to keep a distance… and the way he remembered every single time their skin touched, numbering them and obsessing over them.

Things like the clear breath he exhaled while leaning his flushed face against his chest and rubbing against it…

He rejected the “what if” thoughts rising in his mind. He shook his head stubbornly.

He was hoping until the very end that it was his own misunderstanding.

Yoo Siun checked the time again with worry. On the kitchen island, an apple and a cup of milk were waiting for their owner. As the time he had to leave approached, he cleared his finished coffee cup, hesitated, and then went to Eunseong’s room and knocked on the door.