Place to Be Chapter 16

“On the first day of middle school, Junyoung went up on the podium as the freshman representative. Ah—I had never seen Kwon Kanghee stare at someone so intensely like that, before or since.”

Beside Jang Wigeon, who smiled while slowly trailing off, Kwon Kanghee’s expression seemed to stiffen for a moment, but his face was soon veiled again by an inscrutable, blunt look. Yoon Junyoung’s face also momentarily turned cold.

A Kwon Kanghee who stares intensely at someone—Seo Chiyoung couldn’t conjure such an image even in his imagination.

However, he knows what kind of moment that is. A moment when your eyes cannot leave someone. A moment when you can’t even hear the voice of the person next to you, and only that person’s figure enters your field of vision; Seo Chiyoung had tasted such a moment before, too.

Even now.

Though it wasn’t as intense as it was back then, the person among the three who entered his sight most clearly was one specific man.

Seo Chiyoung brought that fact to the surface of his consciousness and slowly dropped his gaze.

“Even when I called him from right beside him, he just stared at the podium as if he couldn’t hear a thing. Then, as soon as Junyoung stepped down from the podium, the first thing he muttered was, ‘A guy like me who’s only good at fighting will never have a reason to be friends with a guy like that.’ My goodness… As soon as I said, ‘He’s my friend,’ the guy who looked like he’d lost his soul whipped around to look at me instantly…”

“Stop it.”

It was Yoon Junyoung who cut Jang Wigeon off mid-sentence. His mouth, which had remained silent even when Kwon Kanghee had brushed off his hand or when he had frowned, was faintly distorted now, as if he were being subjected to the worst kind of ridicule.

“What’s the point of talking about such stale stories? People keep changing.”

A tone as sharp as a frozen blade cut the conversation short. Jang Wigeon fell silent. However, as if he had vaguely guessed such a reaction would come, he didn’t frown or look awkward. He just said a brief “Sorry” and tilted his glass.

Silence flowed for a while. The voices drifting from inside the shop filled that stillness instead. “I shouldn’t have said that to them,” “I didn’t know they’d be like that,” “Should I try calling?”—words mixed with sighs flowed out like complaints.

Everywhere in the world, regrets and lingering attachments were overflowing as commonly as this. I shouldn’t have done that. I should have done it that way. If I could go back to that time…

Seo Chiyoung closed his eyes. The cool night breeze, which he had forgotten until then, stroked his skin. If he could go back, where would he want to go? He had thought about it a few times. Even though he knew it wouldn’t come true, he thought about it seriously, but the conclusion that always came to mind was only one.

Just as it is now.

It wasn’t easy or comfortable, and his youth was now fading, but just as it is now, that was enough.

However, the only thing he wanted to see again was that man’s figure. The dark blue shadow forming a vivid contrast with the dazzlingly poured golden sunlight; the sight of him sitting by the window with his eyes closed was always fondly tucked away in his mind.

But the time spent soaking in memories did not last long.

“I had the formal meeting between the families last month. I’m getting married before autumn.”

It was because Kwon Kanghee spoke in a clipped manner, scattering the brief, wistful thoughts and breaking even the silence of the spot.

A silence heavier and colder than the night air froze over. Kwon Kanghee looked at neither Yoon Junyoung, who was staring at him with wide eyes, nor Jang Wigeon, who momentarily stopped moving to look at him. He was only staring at his glass, which he had emptied exceptionally often today.

Eventually, Jang Wigeon slowly broke that silence.

“Before autumn…? …Haha, what, are you trying to stir-fry beans in a lightning flash?”

“I asked to do it quickly. Because I want to get it over with soon.”

“…That woman you’re meeting now, you never even showed that you liked her that much.”

Kwon Kanghee did not give any answer. Even though he must have known of the glass-like gaze of Yoon Junyoung staring at him intently, he didn’t give a single glance in that direction.

The smile slowly disappeared from the corners of Jang Wigeon’s mouth, which had been tossing out a strained laugh as if to say, “You’re joking, right?” He glanced at Yoon Junyoung, frowned faintly, and just as he opened his mouth to say, “Hey, Kwon Kang—.”

Yoon Junyoung spoke up a step ahead of him.

“Is it because of me?”

It was a quiet and calm statement. Only then, for the first time, did Kwon Kanghee look at Yoon Junyoung.

“Are you trying to quickly get rid of the person who’s sticking to you like a leech just because of a single mistake?”

As the quiet words flowed out, the corners of Yoon Junyoung’s own mouth twisted as he spoke.

“Do you think I’ll fall off if you do that?”

Seo Chiyoung ended up closing his mouth, which had flinched.

When had he ever engaged in such self-deprecation?

Yoon Junyoung was a cool-headed and intelligent person. Although he was sometimes misunderstood because he was unskilled at dealing with people and had almost no interactions with others, he was merely unskilled; he was never selfish or mean. With only the pride and self-respect that he was not wrong regardless of how those around him viewed him, he had moved forward while enduring the distancing glares of people.

Self-mockery flowing from the mouth of such a person. Words like a deadly poison that stained himself pitch black.

Seo Chiyoung felt as if his fingertips were turning cold, so he quietly clenched his fingers.

Kwon Kanghee looked at Yoon Junyoung with pitch-black eyes that hid his thoughts, as if he were glaring. Finally, a single, heavy response came from his mouth.

“Yeah.”

Yoon Junyoung’s expression seemed to turn pale. However, before Yoon Junyoung could say anything, and before the frowning Jang Wigeon could open his mouth, Kwon Kanghee stood up from his seat.

“I’d like you to definitely come to the wedding. —I should get going first. Drink slowly before you leave.”

Taking out several bills from his wallet and thrusting them into Seo Chiyoung’s hand, he turned away without hesitation. The sound of his heavy footsteps was soon buried and disappeared in the sound of cars and signs of people coming from the main road, leaving only Yoon Junyoung and Jang Wigeon behind.

Seo Chiyoung, who had been feeling troubled while holding an excessively large amount of bills in his hand in front of them, looked down at the silent two and first put the money into the container under the cooking counter. Then, slowly and awkwardly, he sat in front of them.

Yoon Junyoung was looking down only at the empty glass placed before him, as if he had frozen over. And beside him, Jang Wigeon quietly emptied his own glass.

A slow silence flowed for a while. One glass, then another; Jang Wigeon, who had been emptying glasses alone, filled his glass halfway and when the bottle became empty, he told Seo Chiyoung with a formal smile, “One more bottle, please.” Only after that did he mutter slowly to Yoon Junyoung—without even looking at him—as if talking to himself.

“That’s why I keep telling you to just date me.”

The low, calm mutter flowed as lightly as a joke. Yoon Junyoung slowly turned his eyes, which had become reddish perhaps from the alcohol or for some other reason, to look at Jang Wigeon.

“My insides are going to rot away and crumble just watching you guys. Yeah, just date me. Then let’s follow that guy even to his honeymoon and ruin the whole travel atmosphere.”

This time, speaking with a bit more of a joking tone, Jang Wigeon looked straight at Yoon Junyoung. Yoon Junyoung had no expression. Jang Wigeon’s gaze, which would usually be pleasant and affectionate, was now relentless. The person who turned their head away first, as if unable to endure the piercing gaze, was Yoon Junyoung. Only then did a faint, bitter light flicker across the face of Jang Wigeon as he watched Yoon Junyoung.

“Why. You don’t want to follow that guy on his honeymoon? …Then go chase after him now.”

Yoon Junyoung did not answer. However, instead of an answer, he stood up after a short silence. “I’m leaving first,” was all he said.

However, the footsteps of Yoon Junyoung as he left the shop were headed not toward the direction where Kwon Kanghee had disappeared, but toward the uphill part of the market, where his house was located; Jang Wigeon glanced at him and clicked his tongue, but he didn’t chase after him or shout anything.

The radio, which had been left on without a listener, announced midnight. The customers who had occupied one table inside the shop also stood up, and the shop, where only the lights remained brightly lit, became desolate. And there, only Jang Wigeon remained.