Place to Be Chapter 40

“Ah—…, yeah. He’s sleeping right now. He was with me for a bit so he couldn’t answer the phone. I’m sorry. But what’s going on?”

Jang Wigeon’s voice was likewise devoid of emotion. That voice, which I had never heard before, didn’t seem to belong to Jang Wigeon. The low, sunken voice was like deep, cold water where one cannot see to the bottom.

From across the phone, Kwon Kanghee must have felt it as well, as he remained silent for a moment. His voice also became low.

{I’d like you to put Junyoung on.}

“It’s a bit difficult since he’s sleeping right now. He probably fell asleep from exhaustion, so he won’t wake up even if I try. Tell me. I’ll pass it on to him.”

{…It’s something I need to say directly.}

“You said you were going to distance yourself from Junyoung. I’ll help you out. I’ll pass it on for you, so go ahead and tell me.”

{…—Jang Wigeon. This is between me and Junyoung, it’s not your business.}

“It is my business.”

For the first time, it seemed as if Jang Wigeon was faintly smiling. However, there was not a single point of warmth in that slowly distorting smile.

“Before, Kanghee, you spoke of me as if it were a joke. That I’m the kind of guy where you don’t know what I’ll do if I snap. ——Yeah. I think I’m going to snap. I’ve grown tired of this now. I’m fed up with this situation. And fed up with just sucking my thumb and watching that guy suffer.”

{Jang Wigeon.}

“You’re the one who shouldn’t care anymore. No matter what I do. You just stay in that spot and watch. Ah, right. As a wedding present, I’ll make sure Junyoung doesn’t bother you anymore. I’ll keep him tied to my side even by force, to the point where Junyoung won’t even have the luxury to spare a thought for you. Well, either way, Junyoung said he was never going to see you again. That worked out well, Kwon Kanghee.”

{…Jang Wigeon!}

“Congratulations on the wedding. Tomorrow——no, I guess it’s today now, have a good wedding. I’m not sending Junyoung. I don’t think I can make it either. I’ve also held it in for way too long.”

{Jang Wigeon, you——.}

But with those words as the end, without even listening to whatever shouting came from across the phone, Jang Wigeon hung up. He even went as far as pulling out the battery and throwing it.

Unlike that chilly and calm voice, the phone he violently threw against the wall shattered with a loud noise. Amidst the fragments scattering in all directions, Jang Wigeon stood motionless like a statue.

Tick, a small component piece hit Seo Chiyoung’s fingertip and fell. It didn’t hurt, but he instinctively recoiled his hand. However, what entered Seo Chiyoung’s vision before that was Jang Wigeon’s hand, where a faint trace of blood was showing from being scratched by a flying piece.

“…Are you okay?”

Seo Chiyoung asked quietly.

About what. ——Everything.

The heart with which he thinks of Yoon Junyoung, the heart with which Yoon Junyoung thinks of that man, the heart with which he thinks of that man, and the relationships distorting amidst these entangled hearts.

Jang Wigeon, who had been standing with his body turned diagonally away from Seo Chiyoung, hunched his body slightly. After a moment of silence, the bleak gaze that slowly looked back was cold and sharp like a blade.

“If I’m okay, or if I’m not okay, what changes?”

The tone that shot out chillingly was eerie, as if he would tear apart anything beside him. Inside, pitch-black and blood-red emotions were surging.

Seo Chiyoung unintentionally kept his mouth shut. Without even blinking his large eyes, he stared blankly at Jang Wigeon.

His heart sank as if cold water had been poured into his chest. It wasn’t because Jang Wigeon had snapped at him. It was because the man in front of him was extremely unfamiliar. A sensation of strangeness so intense that a feeling of fear flickered through his chest for an instant.

“…”

Soon, Seo Chiyoung realizes it is because he has lost his composure.

Jang Wigeon was always skilled at managing his emotions. No matter what kind of situation he faced, he was one to wear a composed smile with almost no emotional agitation, yet he was now standing at a dead end, unable to even put on the mask to package himself.

And Seo Chiyoung could do nothing for him.

It was just as he said. Whether he was okay or not, nothing changed.

Seo Chiyoung looked at him blankly and then slowly nodded. Seeing Seo Chiyoung mutter, “I see,” Jang Wigeon’s expression crumbled as if he belatedly realized his mistake, but Seo Chiyoung didn’t catch it; he looked at his feet for a moment before raising his head. Although he ended up standing in this spot by chance, he was an outsider, not someone belonging between them. This was not a place for him to be.

It seemed better to go back. No, there was no reason to stay here.

“I’m sorry…. Um, I’ll be going now.”

As Seo Chiyoung bowed his head and turned around, Jang Wigeon’s shirt draped over the chair suddenly caught his eye. Come to think of it, it would be quite a walk to where he had parked his car.

Seo Chiyoung hesitated for a moment and then looked back at him. To Jang Wigeon, who was standing still and looking at Seo Chiyoung with a face that seemed somehow anxious, Seo Chiyoung rubbed the back of his neck and spoke.

“Uh… well, it didn’t look like you brought an umbrella, so if you’re okay with mine, please use it, I’ll leave it here. It’s close to my house, so…”

Having said it, Seo Chiyoung felt a bit embarrassed remembering the umbrella was just a worn-out plastic one. Still, thinking it was better than nothing, he quickly said his goodbyes with, “Then, I’ll be going first,” and went to the foyer.

However, as he slid his feet into his soaked shoes and turned around, a distressed voice approached hesitantly from behind.

“——Mr. Chiyoung…. I’m sorry. Don’t go.”

Seo Chiyoung, who was reaching for the doorknob, turned back around just as he was. Jang Wigeon was standing in front of the foyer hallway. The face that had been chilly to the point of being frightening without a single expression had vanished, and upon that face, a look as complex and distressed as his voice had surfaced.

Seo Chiyoung, who faced him for a moment, stammered, “Uh, but,” and Jang Wigeon walked over to stand in front of him.

“I was wrong. I, a pin just went out in my head for a second, and I did that without realizing. I didn’t mean to be angry at you, Mr. Chiyoung. Truly…. I’m sorry.”

Uh… Seo Chiyoung looked at Jang Wigeon in distress, but seeing him hold out a hand, he hesitantly turned his steps back. As he stood up awkwardly back into the foyer, Jang Wigeon pulled Seo Chiyoung’s hand with a slightly relieved face.

But he had left the shop door open so he had to go quickly—the thought flashed through his mind, but Jang Wigeon’s expression as he sat on the living room sofa was a mixture of relief, darkness, and fatigue, so Seo Chiyoung ended up sitting quietly beside him as he was pulled.

For a while, he said nothing. After keeping his mouth shut as if lost in thought, he very slowly looked back at Seo Chiyoung, who had been watching him in silence.

“…I’m like a fool, right. Childish and not like an adult.”

Suddenly, Jang Wigeon spoke with a bitter smile like a sigh. Since that aura was already different from a moment ago and was the face of the Jang Wigeon that Seo Chiyoung knew well, Seo Chiyoung calmed his heart a little.

“I know it’s not something to get mad at Kanghee for. What can you say to a guy who says he doesn’t like you? Even if I have an outburst like this that isn’t even funny, the situation won’t change and I’ll only look ridiculous.”

Seo Chiyoung said nothing. He simply listened to his words. Jang Wigeon, too, didn’t seem to want an answer, as he fell back into silence after finishing those words.

Beyond the tightly closed window, the sound of rain could be heard in the distance. It didn’t seem like it would stop for a while.

It is a night where the rain-soaked air is heavy. When this night breaks, someone will face a happy day, and someone will face a painful day. And somehow, Seo Chiyoung felt like the new day would be as gloomy for him as that rain.

Suddenly, a low sound of laughter was heard. Laughing with a laugh mixed with a sigh and self-deprecation, Jang Wigeon muttered.

“…Still, it was the first time I confessed seriously.”

In that rain, while running with a feverish body on his back, hearing those painful sobs, Jang Wigeon had for the first time seriously spoken the heart he had long kept on his lips as if it were a joke. And for the first time, he had heard a serious answer. That he was sorry.

“I knew. That he would never come into my hands. I knew it already from a very long time ago.”

Jang Wigeon pushed his body forward slightly and leaned diagonally against the sofa. He rested his neck against the sofa back and closed his eyes while tilting his head back.