Foot Worship Chapter 36

I jolted awake at the sound of my name. I must have drifted off without realizing it. I turned my head to see Jerome standing there with the car door open. The air inside was dry from the heater, leaving my throat feeling parched like a desert. I sat up and reached for my tumbler to take a drink.

“If you’re not feeling well, just go inside. We can talk later—”

“No. I’m fine.”

“You and your stubbornness. Fine, then. I’m going to go have a smoke, so try to wake yourself up a bit.”

Jerome closed the car door and headed toward the back of the building where the smoking area was. I turned down the heat, stepped out of the car, and took off my coat. I couldn’t just let this hard-won opportunity go to waste so pointlessly. I hung my padded jacket on the coat hanger in the back seat and stretched. Having slept for even a short while after taking the medicine, I felt much better. I patted my cheeks to wake up and sat back in the driver’s seat.

Since he’d asked to talk for a bit, I didn’t think we’d need to go anywhere else. Just in case, I turned on the heated seats for the passenger side and tidied up the interior. It felt cluttered since I’d barely driven it all week. Soon, I saw Jerome walking back.

Watching him carry the remnants of his trash in one hand, I couldn’t help but lose myself for a moment. His legs were long and his proportions were so good that it wouldn’t be strange if he were a professional model. His face, of course, went without saying. And as if to prove that my eyes weren’t at all biased, passersby kept glancing at Jerome and whispering.

Jerome approached the driver’s side, not the passenger side. I scrambled to shove the trash into the bin I kept in the car and cracked the door open.

“Did you take your cold medicine?”

His gaze was fixed on the medicine packet tucked into the cup holder.

“…Yes.”

“Get in the passenger seat. I’ll drive.”

Jerome pulled the door wide open and stepped aside to let me out. I reluctantly climbed out of the driver’s seat. He covered the door frame with his hand to make sure I didn’t bump my head. Not only that, but he escorted me to the passenger seat before returning to the driver’s side.

My face flushed hot for no reason. Not only were we the same gender, but anyone could see that I looked much stronger than him, yet he was tending to me with the utmost care, as if I were a fragile baby. It was burdensome, but at the same time, I was glad that his attitude of respect and consideration toward me hadn’t changed from before.

Jerome took off his jacket and coat, laid them in the back seat, and sat down calmly. He adjusted the seat, steering wheel position, and side mirrors to fit his frame. Finally, after fiddling with the rearview mirror, he suddenly leaned toward me. I jumped back in surprise. Jerome’s hand brushed past my ear. With a deadpan expression, he pulled the seatbelt over and clicked it into place before pulling back.

“You look like a rabbit about to be eaten.”

“…If a rabbit heard you, it would be offended.”

I replied in a small, shrinking voice and toyed with my ear. Jerome flexed his hands on the steering wheel and let out a soft laugh. The car pulled out of the parking lot and entered the congested road. It seemed the procession of people trying to enjoy Christmas Eve wasn’t over yet.

“You were reminded of the Foot Worship incident when you saw my sister earlier, weren’t you?”

“…Ah, no.”

“Liar. You were staring like you wanted to kill someone and asking who she was.”

It was embarrassing that it had all been written on my face. Come to think of it, since his sister and mother seemed to live in the States, I was worried if it was okay for him to be away from them like this. I felt uncomfortable, as if I were needlessly taking up his time. Still, I didn’t want to let him go.

“Still don’t remember what I said?”

“…Yes, not yet.”

“Then how did you interpret the hint I gave you?”

“That I must be desperate enough to ask Jerome to be friends, and that Jerome was taking exactly what I said and—” Ah, wait a second.

What Jerome had said was a refusal, saying he didn’t want to be friends, but if I thought about it carefully, the phrase “someone whose face alone makes me get an erection” sounded like he still had feelings for me. That’s why he’d given me a hint and told me to think about those words. Because those words were what connected us. But what on earth was the rest?

“Why did you stop talking? Keep going.”

“That you haven’t completely lost your feelings for me yet. That maybe there’s a chance.”

“Your brain works pretty well, after all.”

“…Give me one more hint.”

“Rabbit.”

Jerome tossed the word out dryly and flicked on the turn signal. Why was he obsessed with rabbits? He switched lanes and headed toward the main road rather than the underground tunnel. This was the way toward Jerome’s house. But where we were going didn’t matter right now. I thought of the appearance of a rabbit and narrowed my eyes. An animal with red eyes, a small body, white fur, and large ears. So what? I wrapped my head in both hands as I felt myself sinking deeper into a labyrinth.

Not long after, we arrived at his home. Jerome parked the car in a convenient spot and unbuckled his seatbelt. Then, he turned to look at me. I hadn’t come up with the answer yet, and I felt frantic.

“Do you still want to be friends with me?”

“…I want to be, even if it’s just friends.”

“Then, shall we be friends? Eat together, watch movies, talk on the phone.”

“…”

“And if we meet someone good along the way, we can introduce them to each other.”

The moment the question was posed, my mind went blank. Only then did it occur to me that the thoughts I’d had on the way here might have been my own delusion. Jerome might have already finished moving on and could be looking for a new partner. Was it really the right thing to even try being friends?

I forcibly calmed my heart and thought about the scenarios he had mentioned. Drinking and talking on the phone—I could somehow endure that—but I knew I couldn’t possibly stand the thought of him introducing someone else as the person he was seeing. I knew how he handled people, what kind of look he gave them, how he drove them—and no matter how much his feelings for me might fade, I knew I couldn’t bear that.

“…I’m sorry.”

I kept my head bowed low and offered my apology.

“That’s for the best. I didn’t intend to be friends anyway. I realized what Jin meant by the words he said when he rejected me back then.”

“…”

“So, the conclusion is that you still don’t remember?”

We were back at square one. I nodded slowly. I couldn’t claim to remember when I didn’t, so there was nothing I could do. But I felt a bit resentful. It felt too cruel to tell a man who’d been dead drunk to remember what he’d said. Jerome rubbed under his chin and stared at me intently.

“I expected you to ask for more time. Jin, you always go against my expectations.”

My firm resolution to show my honesty was nowhere to be found, and I was just nervously gauging his reaction. Should I tell him I liked him here? Should I beg for just one more chance? My mind was a mess. I gnawed on my innocent lips and shook my legs uncontrollably.

“Call me when you sober up and remember. And you only need to say one thing.”

“…Tie me up!”

Jerome’s face stiffened, then softened. Then, as if he found it absurd, he let out a soft laugh.

A thrill ran through my entire body. The timing was absolutely perfect. I hadn’t remembered anything, but hearing Jerome’s words, that one phrase had suddenly come back to me. Tie me up.

I let out a shaky breath and rubbed my face with both hands. Even I found this situation incredible. It was a turning point that had arrived dramatically at the moment I thought everything was over.

Jerome gathered his jacket and coat from the back seat, braced his hand against the side of the passenger headrest, and leaned toward me.

“To a Rigger like me, asking to be tied up is the same as a proposal. Do you know that?”

“…Ah.”

My face flushed bright red at the word “proposal.”

“Never mind that. What kind of opportunity would you like me to give you, Jin?”

“…”

“If by any chance you’re asking for a play, that’s going to be difficult for the time being. It’s not too late to start after I’ve figured out the exact state of Jin’s health, and especially since you have a cold, it’s absolutely out of the question.”