Struggle Chapter 126

Nanyoung was a child who required almost no looking after, just as his parents had said. He wasn’t a newborn or an elementary school student. Since Taerok wasn’t the type to suddenly change his lifestyle because of a kid who would be an adult in half a year, that was truly a relief.

Taerok went out early and came home late as usual, sometimes went on business trips, and devoted himself entirely to work. He was the type who gained more energy the busier he got, and with exercise and martial arts as a hobby on the side, he was practically never home. When he came in late at night, sometimes light would seep through the crack of Nanyoung’s door, and sometimes it wouldn’t. They hardly ever ran into each other.

Then one day, Taerok, who had a rare day off, went down to the basement in the morning to swim and came back up. There was the smell of coffee and slightly burnt bread. He went to the living room, and there was Nanyoung. He had a piece of toast in his mouth and was holding a large tumbler with coffee that made a clinking ice sound.

As soon as their eyes met, Nanyoung’s eyes looked like the harp seal from the other day.

“Is today a holiday?”

Taerok asked, even though he knew it was Saturday.

“I had a mock exam yesterday… so I’m going to review at home today.”

“Usually you weren’t home?”

“I was home, but….”

Taerok headed for the coffee machine. Nanyoung hesitantly dodged out of the way and ended up taking a seat at the dining table.

“I thought I lived alone.”

At that indifferent remark, Nanyoung was a bit dumbfounded.

“It wasn’t me who wasn’t coming home.”

“Well, that’s true.”

Even knowing it, he absolutely would not admit it was his own fault.

He could have just gotten up and gone to his room, but at this timing, Nanyoung worried he’d look like a sulking child, so he tore at his toast where he sat.

Taerok took the seat across from Nanyoung and asked, “Shall I toast it again for you?”

“No. I like it a little burnt.”

“Me too.”

A common point in an unexpected place. Even Taerok, who had answered without thinking, was a little surprised.

And then silence again.

“Do you have a lover?”

Taerok opened a small stainless steel container and took out some almonds as he asked.

“No….”

“People in our family aren’t bad-looking, so why not? Seems like you’d have a lot of people who like you.”

“We’re all exam-takers.”

“Yeah? You’ve never even been confessed to?”

“…Earlier this year….”

“A classmate?”

“The next class over.”

Nanyoung spoke haltingly. He was so nervous from the sudden conversation with Taerok that his head wasn’t working properly.

To Nanyoung, who was gripping his tumbler tightly and had lowered his head to avoid his gaze, Taerok asked.

“But isn’t your school an all-boys school?”

Only then did Nanyoung lift his head.

His eyes met Taerok’s head-on. Since when had he been looking? He was gazing at him intently. As if licking all the way inside his body.

∞ ∞ ∞

Having finished signing, Taerok rolled his custom-made fountain pen across the desk. Head, tail. Tail, head. As if tapping it alternately, he then swiveled his chair around.

At the words, “Isn’t your school an all-boys school?”, Nanyoung had panicked and shot up from his seat. He grabbed the wrist of the kid who was about to pass by and flee to his room.

‘You said you were confessed to, not that you confessed, so why are you running away.’

‘…’

‘Or did you say yes? No, that’s not it. You said you don’t have a lover.’

‘Let me go.’

He didn’t want to let go. It was someone else’s business. Even if it was family, it was an intensely private matter that was none of his concern or involvement, but uncharacteristically, Taerok rubbed the inside of Nanyoung’s wrist with his thumb, and slowly, languidly, as if tightening a snare to make his heart ache, he asked.

‘Do you like men?’

Nanyoung smacked Taerok’s hand away. Then he fled to his room.

Not long after, he left his room with his backpack not even fully closed and walked out of the house. To anyone watching, it was clear he was so uncomfortable being home that he was leaving. Taerok, who had been sitting quietly at the dining table until then, grabbed the tumbler and followed him to the front door. He caught hold of Nanyoung, who was trying to pretend he didn’t notice to the very end, and pressed the tumbler into his hand.

‘Since it’s been a while since we saw each other, let’s have a meal together. Come home in time for dinner.’

Nanyoung did not come back in time for dinner. Past midnight, when the date had changed, the front door quietly opened. Taerok heard that sound from his study and slowly took off his glasses.

Just like that time, Taerok, having removed his glasses, pressed and pinched the bridge of his nose between his brows with his fingers. His gaze, turned absently, fell upon a clock. It was a very small, antique-looking clock, the kind he normally never paid attention to, to the point where he wondered how long it had even been there.

Who had bought him that?

He frowned and pondered for a long while, then recalled that when he had first moved into this office, his brother had brought a few things as gifts. A nameplate, a coffee machine, and….

‘Ah, I bought this when I went to Switzerland with the kids last winter break, it’s for you. Nanyoung said to give it to his uncle.’

Back then, he had let it go in one ear and out the other.

‘Yeah. Just put it over there.’

Taerok was truly a heartless person, after all.

I’d completely forgotten about it…. There are so many things I’d forgotten. He rubbed his chin and abruptly stood up from his seat. The clock was pointing to 4:15.

∞ ∞ ∞

It was the first time he had postponed his afternoon schedule. Taerok was someone whose work suited his aptitude perfectly, and who liked to be in control no matter the situation.

“I didn’t expect to slack off over something like this.”

Now, Taerok was at the back gate of Nanyoung’s school, just like when he had first come to pick him up. The main gate was chaotic with academy shuttle buses and parents’ cars. He had sent a message, but had Nanyoung checked it? He intended to wait just ten minutes, and if Nanyoung didn’t show up, he would quit this stupid act that even he himself couldn’t understand and go home.

But even after making that resolution, Taerok waited fifteen more minutes. By now, most of the students had gone home for the day. Just as Taerok clicked his tongue and started the engine, Nanyoung finally appeared.

He must not have thought Taerok would come to pick him up. Nanyoung walked right past his car. Taerok, who hadn’t turned off the engine in the first place, started the car moving at the same pace as those footsteps.

Nanyoung, who had been so deeply lost in thought that he didn’t notice for a long while, finally realized that people’s gazes were focused on him and only then spotted Taerok.

“Wha…! You scared me….”

With perhaps a little exaggeration, Nanyoung was so startled he practically jumped on the spot and clutched his chest.

Taerok was wearing sunglasses. Even though he was dressed in a full suit, it was astonishing how much more disreputable he looked for the single reason of wearing sunglasses.

“Get in the car.”

Taerok said shortly. Even his line sounded like a bad guy.

“What brings you here? Did you contact me?”

“I did. Do you go around not even looking at your phone? Don’t kids these days all keep it glued to their hand?”

“I had it turned off…. There’s no one who really contacts me anyway.”

“Then from now on, look at it sometimes. So you can get my messages. Will you get in now?”

Taerok’s car was extremely sleek, the kind that even someone clueless about car models could tell was exorbitantly expensive. Under the focused stares, Nanyoung quickly got into the car. He didn’t usually go around showing off that he was a rich young master, so he was already worried about next week.

“I came to pick you up to go eat.”

“It’s still early, though? Isn’t this when you should be at the office?”

“I couldn’t concentrate. Since you moved in, we haven’t had a proper meal together. Today, let’s eat something a bit expensive, not hamburgers. Do you like Western food?”

“Yes. I eat everything well.”

Taerok nodded vaguely and drove as he pleased.

Leaving familiar areas behind, they arrived at an underground restaurant. The tables were very small, as if they only accepted a limited number of guests with reservations. There seemed to be more waitstaff and kitchen staff than customers. The interior was very dark, with only the small lamps on each table providing any light.

“Sit.”

Taerok pulled out Nanyoung’s chair himself instead of the dedicated server.

“They’re open at this hour?”

“They’re not. It’s a friend’s place, so it’s fine.”

Soon, a person who appeared to be the chef came out from inside. Though not as much as Taerok, it was Mr. Kim Saon, who had been born into a wealthy family, learned cooking abroad, and opened his own restaurant.

“It’s been a while since you came. I was surprised you suddenly contacted me, hey. Good thing it’s my day off.”

“I almost canceled all my evening appointments.”