Charles and Richard Chapter 8

The small golden head tilted as it wrestled with indecision. The father drove the final nail into the hesitating Richard.

Father: Mom bought Girl Scout cookies, too, I hear.

Richard succumbed to the persuasion.

Richard pushed open the front door of Charles’s house, feeling a sense of unfamiliarity at visiting for the first time in a long while. Charles was sitting on the living room floor with a puzzle spread out before him. Cherry lay beside him, occasionally licking Charles’s hand as he worked on the puzzle. When Richard appeared at the front door together with his father, Charles pursed his lips but greeted both of them. Richard was happy that Charles greeted him. He set his bag down on the sofa and sat down next to Charles.

R: A puzzle? How many pieces?

C: A thousand pieces.

R: How long have you been working on it?

C: A week.

R: Can I work on it with you?

C: ….

Charles didn’t answer. Though he clearly didn’t much like the idea, Richard decided to act brazen. Charles didn’t stop him as he chattered away beside him, trying piece after piece. They kept working on the puzzle until the meal was ready. Soon after, the mother, home from work, joined in, and the three of them put their heads together, huddled close, working on the puzzle. Richard would chatter about this and that, the mother would answer, and Charles would occasionally say a word—it was exactly the peaceful daily life of the old days.

When the father announced mealtime, everyone gathered around the table. Seven or eight meatballs were piled onto Richard’s plate. Even as he wolfed them down, Richard would suddenly lift his eyes and steal glances at Charles. Charles was telling short little stories about what had happened at school. While occasionally chiming in, Richard secretly observed Charles.

Faint freckles, which he didn’t know when they had appeared, were dotted across cheeks that used to be just white and pale. He’s got freckles. Richard thought as he chewed a mouthful of meatballs in both cheeks. The navy blue sweater covering Charles’s wrists looked a little small on him. Had he grown taller? Richard suddenly thought. He had always thought of Charles as a younger brother, always smaller than himself, but lately he had a feeling that Charles had grown a bit taller than him.

Sensing his gaze, Charles grumbled and looked at him. When their eyes met, Richard beamed broadly. Charles stared at him as if he were truly strange, then averted his eyes. Richard was in a good mood.

Dinnertime was pleasant. Dessert was, just as the father had said, Girl Scout butter cookies and almond chocolates. The whole family gathered and worked on the puzzle together. The mother’s gaze gradually drifted to the television, and later she sat on the sofa, completely absorbed in a TV program. Cherry clung to Richard’s side the entire time, yawning or pestering him for pets. Before they knew it, it was nine in the evening, and the parents said it was time to wash up.

While Charles washed up first, the parents laid out Richard’s bedding in Charles’s room. Charles grumbled, asking couldn’t Richard just sleep in Emily’s room, but he didn’t tell them to move the bedding. Richard was inwardly thrilled. He showered in a flash and came out. Charles had already dried his hair and gotten into bed. He had his back turned toward where Richard’s bedding was laid.

Richard crawled under the covers without a word. Charles’s ceiling was pitch dark. Richard suddenly remembered that he had torn off all his glow-in-the-dark stars. A sudden pang of guilt struck him.

R: Charlie, you asleep?

C: ….

R: Charlie.

C: ….

R: Charlieee.

C: What.

Now that Charles had actually responded, Richard was tongue-tied. He stared up at Charles’s back, searching for words. But he didn’t even know what he wanted to say. Lately, Richard had been feeling too many inexplicable emotions, feelings that were hard to explain. The sensations he was experiencing for the first time sometimes clogged up his throat so tightly he couldn’t say a word. Just like right now.

When Richard remained silent, Charles tossed and turned. Richard, who had been hesitating, barely managed to speak in a voice that seemed to crawl away into hiding.

R: Isn’t your room too dark?

C: What about it.

R: Because I tore off all the stars last time….

C: ….

R: If it were me, I think I’d be scared.

C: I’m not scared.

Charles answered bluntly. Richard kept staring at his back under the blanket, then raised himself up. Rustling, he got up and walked around to the side of the bed Charles was facing. Charles had his eyes closed. Even knowing Richard had come to the front and was looking at him, he didn’t open his eyes. Richard could make out Charles’s face thanks to the white streetlamp light shining in through the window.

He gazed at the freckles scattered across his dry cheekbones and the eyelashes that cast faint shadows beneath his eyelids. Richard wished he would open his eyes. Instead of speaking, he placed his hand on the bed mattress and shook it lightly. Charles frowned, wrinkling the bridge of his nose. When Richard tugged gently at the bedsheet, Charles finally opened his eyes. As his eyelids rolled back, clear green eyes as transparent as glass marbles surfaced. In the dim room, only his eyes were wide awake and bright. The streetlamp light was faintly caught in them, making his eyes seem brighter than usual. Richard, his shoulders stiffening for some reason, could do nothing but stare into those eyes. Charles looked at Richard for a moment, then closed his eyes again.

In that instant, Richard felt a sharp pain in his chest. He didn’t know why. That brief ache was also one of the things difficult to explain.

∞ ∞ ∞

As the Christmas season drew near with great strides, snowy days became more frequent. As time passed, Richard hung out with Charles and Charles’s friends quite often. After school let out, they had snowball fights on the school grounds, and they secretly snuck out cafeteria trays to sled down the school hill. The friends found Richard fascinating. Richard, who was prim and quiet in the classroom, would grow chatty and expressive the moment he saw Charles. They had once mentioned Richard’s transformation to Charles. Charles only answered that it was because they had been friends since childhood.

When a short break started just before Christmas, someone suggested a party. The parents were going to be out late, and the older brothers, who were high schoolers, had planned a party inviting their friends and invited everyone, including Richard and Charles. Everyone was wildly excited as they all gathered at the house where the party was being held. It was in the neighborhood where Richard lived. The fourteen-year-old boys shut themselves in one room, ate pizza, and played video games. As far as parties went, it was pretty much the same as their usual routine. That is, until someone discovered the Playboy under the bed.

Playboy. The Playboy magazines discovered under the high school brother’s bed were a shock to the fourteen-year-old boys. At the same time, the secret desire that everyone knew about but no one shared suddenly appeared stark naked in a public space. Some boys’ ears turned red, and some boys cheered and lunged for the magazines. Flipping through the magazines filled with naked women, they spat out a few curses through their still-unripe pink lips.

Before they knew it, the boys had gathered in a circle around the magazines, staring blankly at the naked women. Seductive beauties revealed their lovely breasts and stretched out their taut, shapely buttocks. Richard was among the boys as well. He looked at the magazine with his cheeks slightly flushed. Rather than feeling any particular desire, his heart pounded at the thought that he was secretly looking at something he shouldn’t be seeing. As his gaze moved along the fingers turning the pages, Richard saw Charles. Charles was among the boys just the same.