A Scorching Day Chapter 19

“D…don’t touch me.”

Smack. Gawon unconsciously made a sound and slapped Ki Joon’s hand away. The surge of emotion in that moment had been too intense.

He hadn’t even apologized first, even though he was the one in the wrong. He’d been frightened and stepped back, and even pushed away the hand extended to him. He felt like crying. He hated himself so much for being so pathetic. And because he simply couldn’t understand Ki Joon, who would go this far for someone like him.

“Sorry. I won’t touch you without—”

“Don’t say you’re sorry!”

In the end, he had no choice but to shout. Gawon glared at Ki Joon with eyes that had somehow already grown moist.

“What are you sorry for? What are you sorry about?”

“…”

“I’m the one who misunderstood, I’m the one who acted on my own… I’m the one who cursed and hit you, so what are you sorry for? Seriously.”

“Just… I made you upset.”

His plain, low voice instantly cut through Gawon’s agitated, trembling voice. Ki Joon took another step closer. The distance that had required him to stretch out his arm narrowed further. The familiar, pleasant body scent wafted over.

“If I hadn’t stupidly suggested you come over to my place today… you would have just eaten tteokbokki with me outside like usual and gone to study, wouldn’t you.”

Ki Joon sheepishly scratched the back of his head.

“But I really didn’t know, that’s why….”

“…”

“I’ll be careful from now on. I won’t make you cry. So.”

“…”

“Can you forgive me?”

At this point, he was dumbfounded. It felt like facing a problem that could never be solved. Gawon stared blankly at Ki Joon’s face.

“…Aren’t you… angry?”

“About what?”

“I misunderstood on my own, and I hit you and cursed at you… I did that.”

The venom in Gawon’s voice had completely drained away now. He was just curious. His heart, which had been full of ‘why’ questions, now had one more added to it.

How. How could he do this much for him? Gawon had never known in his life that a person could stand on the street for hours waiting for someone else.

“Anyway, the fact that I hurt you is true. …Even if it wasn’t intentional. So whether you cursed at me or beat me up, it doesn’t matter.”

“…”

“I just… hope you can forgive me.”

Ki Joon smiled faintly. It was a smile that naturally exuded the composure of the strong. But it also contained the clear wish to be forgiven.

His voice had power. The power to take Gawon’s hand, deeply consumed by confusion and self-loathing, and pull him up to the surface.

At that moment, somehow, all the tension drained from him. They had known each other for less than a month. They were only that kind of relationship, yet he couldn’t help but be surprised by Ki Joon’s influence, stronger than he’d thought.

His tantrum, thrown because he didn’t want to show his ugly side, now felt futile. He had the instinct that he could no longer pretend to Ki Joon.

Gawon slowly lowered his head. He nodded it a couple of times in that position. For some reason, he couldn’t look Ki Joon straight in the eyes.

“I’m sorry too… for misunderstanding you recklessly. And… for cursing and hitting you.”

It was a hesitant but small, clear voice. After apologizing, he felt relieved. Was conveying sorry feelings to someone, sincerely begging for forgiveness, always this refreshing? Gawon, who had hardly ever shared that kind of connection with anyone, couldn’t know.

“Heh heh.”

Even at that short, short apology, Ki Joon laughed like a fool. It was a laugh that didn’t quite match the smile his handsome face made.

Ki Joon’s hand, approaching eagerly, landed on Gawon’s head again. Gently, gently. Gawon looked up at him as he carefully stroked his head, with a puzzled expression.

Why does he keep touching my head… Come to think of it, Ki Joon was always very tactile. Habitually slinging an arm around his shoulder, and sometimes touching his head. He always pressed his body close without any hesitation.

“Oh, you said you didn’t like being touched. Sorry, sorry.”

“…”

“I don’t know why I keep wanting to touch you like this.”

He didn’t dislike it. Outside, he’d just been worried about the other kids seeing. Here, where no students’ feet would reach, it felt like none of that mattered. So Gawon spoke his honest feelings.

“I don’t hate it.”

“…Huh?”

“When you touch me… I don’t dislike it.”

He expected that if he said this, Ki Joon would immediately flash that mischievous grin on his handsome face and press close. That he’d playfully pat his head and sling an arm around his shoulder.

But Ki Joon just stared at him with a surprised, dazed expression. After a not-so-short moment, Ki Joon cleared his throat with an ahem, and his ears were tinged bright red.

Why is he acting like that.

…It’s not like I meant I wanted him to touch me. Did it sound that way?

Suddenly, the heat transferred over. Gawon, not knowing what to do, quickly turned his gaze away. Under the streetlight, Gawon’s face too began to flush red. He had no idea why he was acting like this.

Ahem, ahem. After clearing his throat awkwardly a few times, Ki Joon abruptly spoke. His voice was so nonchalant it was as if the brief awkwardness had been a mistake.

“Ah— I’m hungry.”

“…”

“I want to eat something with Yoon Gawon…”

He said it as if he wanted Gawon to hear. Anyway, this guy had a knack for brazenly charging forward. A chuckle escaped Gawon involuntarily.

Besides, Gawon was in a position where he had to apologize to Ki Joon today anyway. He could afford to treat him to at least one meal. As long as it wasn’t too expensive….

If possible, he wanted to generously buy him something expensive. He felt quite sorry, and considering Ki Joon took him to the snack bar and tteokbokki place every day, treating him to one proper meal wouldn’t be a waste at all.

But he really had absolutely no money to spare. The only cash he had was the few tens of thousands of won he’d earned from a short-term part-time job peeling onions at an acquaintance’s restaurant a few days ago. He was just grateful he even had that.

A Chinese restaurant or a kimbap place would be about…. Thinking that far, Gawon cautiously asked.

“…What do you want to eat?”

“I want ramen.”

Ki Joon answered promptly, as if he’d been waiting for the question. It was such an unassuming choice that all his worries seemed pointless. But inside the house, there wasn’t even any decent kimchi. Above all, he didn’t want to show Ki Joon the moldy wallpaper or the cramped, narrow house. Gawon fidgeted his fingers timidly.

“Sorry, but there’s no ramen or kimchi at home. …If you wait here just a moment, I’ll go in and get some money… Let’s eat out.”

“Then I know a place. Want to go there? It’s close by. They make amazing ramen and udon.”

Had he noticed Gawon’s troubled expression? Ki Joon readily offered another suggestion. Gawon nodded and was about to turn to get the money when—

“I’m hungry, Gawon. Let’s just go straight there. There’s no time to stop by your house.”

“Just a moment. I still need to get the money….”

“Ah, hurry hurry. I’m really about to die here.”

It took less than 30 seconds to walk to his house, but Ki Joon made a fuss, saying he didn’t even have time for that. Was he going to pay again today, just like he always did? Gawon shook his head, not wanting to be treated today.

“Just wait a little. I’ll be right back… Today, I have to treat you—”

“Come on, whoever suggests going first pays. Come on— hurry up and leeet’s go.”

Ki Joon drew out the end of his words, looking very pleased. A firm arm wrapped around his neck. As he pulled Gawon in with a shoulder hug, Gawon’s body fluttered like a paper doll. After stumbling a couple of steps, his body helplessly clung to Ki Joon.

Clearly pulled into an embrace, Gawon was horrified and pushed Ki Joon’s side away. At that moment, Gawon had to be flustered again. It wasn’t like he was a rock… it felt like pushing against a solidly standing wall.

“Wha, what is this. Why is your body like this?”

“Huh? Why.”

“It doesn’t feel like a human body. Is there something… inside? Or are you wearing some kind of bulletproof vest….”

Flustered, Gawon felt Ki Joon’s body here and there, as if searching him. His flat palms patted his stomach and sides. As his hand finally moved up and touched his broad chest—

“…!”

Gawon’s eyes suddenly widened. The spark that had momentarily subsided now dyed his entire face and neck, slowly spreading. He had belatedly realized what he was doing.

“Ki Joon. …Sorry. So, that is….”

“Yeah.”

“…Me touching, I touched… it wasn’t with any other intention….”

“Yeah, yeah.”

His words kept tangling because he was flustered. As he stammered like a fool, Ki Joon leaned his face in close. Gawon, not wanting to show the heat blazing on his face or his stammering lips, turned his head away sharply.

But Ki Joon’s playful gaze persistently followed him. His grinning face was right in front of him. Gawon felt annoyed that he was the only one so flustered while Ki Joon just kept smiling.

“Why. If it wasn’t that kind of intention, then what was it, huh?”

“Your face… you’re too close! Get away.”

In the end, he let out a squawk. When he pushed Ki Joon’s face away with his palm, Ki Joon laughed out loud, hahaha. He laughed so hard his shoulders shook, finding it hilarious.

He’d laughed like this before too, when Gawon had pushed his face away. Gawon, his face bright red, cast a sharp glance at Ki Joon.