A Scorching Day Chapter 50

From the moment they boarded the train a while ago until now, Gawon hadn’t been able to hide his childlike excitement. He would gaze out the window at the scenery rushing past, then idly sweep his palm over the armrest and seat, and fidget with the kimbap and water bottle on the fold-down table. Every time the train clattered, a full-blown smile spread across his face.

“You know, I’ve actually never been on a train before.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“So it’s so, so fascinating and nice. I’m excited. It really feels like I’m going on a trip.”

“You really are going on a trip.”

Gawon, whispering in his excited voice, was unbearably endearing. Ki Joon smiled and gently stroked Gawon’s hand. The ring on his white fingers gleamed brilliantly.

Actually, he had wanted to go on a trip right after the entrance exam ended. Ever since he’d once heard Gawon say he wanted to see the ocean, it had been on his mind. Ideally, he would have taken him during summer break, but Gawon had postponed it, saying they’d go after the exam.

But even after the exam ended, they couldn’t leave right away. Gawon insisted that this time he would save up his own money, and he worked for a whole month at an uncle’s establishment.

It pained Ki Joon to see him peeling onions and serving tables, and he tried to talk him out of it every day, but there was no stopping Gawon once he’d made up his mind. In the end, only after Gawon had saved up enough travel funds to his satisfaction did he finally give in to Ki Joon’s urging and quit the part-time job.

But now, that grueling labor was over. Since he’d gotten into a good university, tutoring jobs would be coming in soon, too.

Ki Joon smiled contentedly as he thought. Gawon had studied so steadfastly, and in the end, he got into the school he wanted. Just as expected of his smart boyfriend.

He couldn’t tell you how happy he’d been when he heard the news of his acceptance a few days ago. Ki Joon took Gawon to the best restaurant he knew. He bought him lots of delicious food and gave him the acceptance gift he’d prepared in advance. That gift now shone proudly on their fingers, which were tightly interlaced.

Actually, he’d wanted to buy him a watch. But he’d been afraid of the cold look Gawon would give him when he handed it over. Even after two years of dating, Gawon still felt incredibly burdened by receiving anything from him.

After much deliberation, the gift he’d prepared was a ring. There was one more, but he planned to give that at their destination.

Fortunately, Gawon was overjoyed to receive the couple ring. He took photo after photo, vowing that he would never take it off, and his voice was so cute that Ki Joon had to struggle to suppress the urge to nibble on Gawon’s cheeks the entire time he listened.

“Aren’t you hungry? Have some more of my kimbap.”

“No, you eat it. You need to eat a lot so these get chubbier.”

Ki Joon laughed softly as he caressed Gawon’s cheeks, which he loved so much. Gawon shot him a sidelong glance, then picked up a piece of kimbap and popped it into his mouth. He put one in his own mouth, too, and chewed it prettily.

Chewing their kimbap side by side, Ki Joon took Gawon’s hand again. Gawon’s heart, which had been anxious because his mother hadn’t come home or contacted him, now seemed much lighter. Fortunately, his mother had shown up a few days ago. Apparently, she looked to be in good shape, enough to make all his worries seem unfounded.

‘I guess she found a man.’

Gawon had said calmly.

‘That’s fine, I guess… I’m going to move out soon anyway.’

‘Yeah.’

‘I hope he’s a good person.’

The way he’d said it made Ki Joon’s heart ache for him. Ki Joon had answered, ‘Don’t worry. I’m sure he will be,’ and held Gawon tightly. He sincerely hoped so. So that his beautiful boyfriend wouldn’t have to worry anymore.

∞ ∞ ∞

As soon as they got off at Gangneung Station, the first place they headed to was a raw fish restaurant near the beach. Ki Joon ordered a generous set with snow crab and sashimi. Gawon gazed at the lavish table spread and let out gasps of admiration as if spellbound.

“That looks really delicious…”

“Eat lots and lots.”

Just watching Gawon eat so neatly, like a little squirrel, made Ki Joon feel full. He contentedly picked out crab meat and placed it on Gawon’s plate.

After the meal, they had coffee at a pretty cafe on Coffee Street. Sitting side by side with Gawon, gazing at the clear blue sea and the sky adjoining it through the large window, Ki Joon felt like there was nothing in the world to envy. Gawon, as if he couldn’t quite believe it, leaned his head on Ki Joon’s shoulder several times.

“So this is how everyone lives. This happily…”

Those small murmured words stung Ki Joon’s heart. It wasn’t self-pity—just pure wonder at discovering something he hadn’t known before. Ki Joon gently squeezed Gawon’s hand.

“Let’s live doing lots and lots of fun things together from now on.”

Gawon looked at him with deep, steady eyes. The way he obediently nodded was so beautiful.

Beyond the glass window, the color of the sky, which had been endlessly blue, began to change. The sun was tilting toward the horizon. The two quickly left the cafe and walked side by side toward the beach right in front of the building.

The cool scent of the sea rode the wind and washed over them. Ki Joon slowly closed his eyes and savored the gentle breeze.

The wind tickling his face, the hair fluttering in the air, Gawon’s body heat transmitted through their clasped hands. All of it made Ki Joon feel the overwhelming realization that he was here with the one he loved.

Gradually, the sky turned red, and the pouring sunset drenched the two of them completely. A few seagulls let out plaintive cries as they crossed the orange-tinted sky. With a crash, the waves approached their feet and broke into white foam.

“The sea… So this is the sea.”

Gawon stopped in the middle of the sandy beach and gazed endlessly at the reddening horizon. The blue sea, which seemed calm at first glance, was mercilessly swallowing the blazing sun. As if it had no concern for the wishes of young lovers praying that this day would last forever.

“You said you wanted to see it. The sea.”

“Yeah… I really wanted to come see it.”

Ki Joon spoke tenderly as he brushed back Gawon’s slender, wildly blowing hair. Gawon’s thin lips curved slightly. That smile looked somehow bittersweet.

“You know, Joon-ah.”

“Yeah.”

“I always wanted to die at the sea.”

Ki Joon’s breath caught in his throat.

“Ever since I was very young. I was curious about what the sea was like. It’s so vast and big, so surely I could throw away one body like mine. I knew drinking in all that water would be painful and hard, but the pain would end soon… If I could become sea foam and drift freely through that vast ocean, then I would truly be free. There would be no more hard times, no more sad things like this…”

“Gawon.”

Ki Joon didn’t want to hear any more. He pulled Gawon into a tight embrace with trembling hands.

“Don’t say that. Don’t…”

His heart sank heavily. Suddenly, the body held in his arms felt painfully fragile. Had Yoon Gawon always been this small and delicate? An unfounded anxiety surged like a wave—that if he blew on him, he might fly away somewhere and he would never, ever find him again.

“It’s okay, Joon-ah.”

Gawon let out a small laugh. Wriggling out of the firm embrace, he met Ki Joon’s eyes squarely and smiled.

“…Earlier, when I was looking at the sea from the cafe, I had a thought.”

“…”

“I realized that I’ve been holding on and refusing to die all this time because I wanted to live like this. To drink coffee with you in a place this beautiful…”

His ring-clad hand reached out and gently traced Ki Joon’s face. Just as Ki Joon had done earlier, he tenderly brushed back the hair tousled by the wind.

“I want to live now, Joon-ah.”

Ki Joon listened to Gawon’s words, barely daring to breathe. The crimson light scattering in his delicate eyes was heartbreakingly beautiful.

“To come to the sea with you every year like this, to eat raw fish, drink coffee, watch the sunsets, and swim in the summer… I want to live that way now.”

“It will be that way. Gawon. I’ll make sure of it.”

Ki Joon said with conviction, interlocking his fingers tightly with Gawon’s. He meant it. If he could become the reason for this kid’s life, he felt he could do anything. He was already prepared for that.

“There’s something I want to give you.”

Ki Joon spoke carefully, still holding Gawon’s hand.

“Huh…? What is it?”

“Originally, I was going to wait until I’d collected a hundred trophies to tell you… but this actually means more to me than that. I hope you’ll accept it.”

Gawon’s eyes widened. Ki Joon took off the rosary bracelet hanging on his wrist and held it out to Gawon.

“…Ki Joon. How could I take this… something this precious…”

Gawon shook his head, flustered. But Ki Joon had already made up his mind.

“As I told you before, it’s my mother’s keepsake. My mother used to wear this bracelet and pray the rosary, and every time, she prayed fervently. Only for my safety.”

“…”

“She gave me this bracelet about a month before she passed away. She told me to always carry it wherever I went. She said the wish she prayed for every day was right here.”

He had lived through a dangerous childhood. He’d been accustomed to that kind of life from birth. A life where safety couldn’t be guaranteed. Memories of times his very life was threatened. This object carried his mother’s desperate will to protect her only son, even amidst such chaos.

It was the trace of her earnest prayers for his well-being, and the proof of her love that had saved him even through terrible ordeals. So Ki Joon placed this object, which could be called his everything, around Gawon’s wrist.

“Gawon. My wish is you.”

His unwavering gaze was fixed on Gawon.

“I will protect you.”

“…”

“I’ll make you happy for life, make you laugh, and take you to beautiful places.”

Forever, like that.

As if making a vow to Gawon and to himself, Ki Joon declared each word clearly. With the sunset burning brilliantly behind the two boys. Over the sea that Gawon had once wanted to throw his life into, but now wanted to hold his hand and simply gaze at its beauty.

The fiery sunset that had dyed the sky was now burning in his frail boy’s eyes. It was so intense and beautiful it was blinding. The flames soon transferred and seared into Ki Joon, burning into him.

His chest ached as if on fire. A deep burn of love remained in the center of Ki Joon’s heart. It was, without a doubt, the most beautiful moment of his life. The nineteen, the hot, the fervent time when the two boys stood together.

But the sun slowly sank into the water. At the edge of the world’s hottest time, what remained after the flower had burned was the horizon lurking in the immense darkness. The sinister waves, opening their pitch-black maws, trying to swallow the two boys.