Being Loved for the First Time – Chapter 12

Author: B0ucha

“What? You’re telling me not to come see the little princess—”

“Don’t come!”

My brother’s forceful repetition made him seem like a complete stranger.

‘Brother?’

Both Mikhail and I stared at him in surprise.

“If you hadn’t been here, Anastasia wouldn’t have been in danger!”

“Damian, I didn’t do it on purpose. She wasn’t seriously hurt either—”

“Enough! Leave!”

This was completely unlike my brother.

‘Even when my sister scribbled all over his precious book, he gently asked her why she’d done it…’

Yet now he wouldn’t even give Mikhail a chance to explain himself.

“You…”

Mikhail parted his lips and looked between my brother and me.

My brother turned his head sharply away, refusing even to meet Mikhail’s eyes.

‘No, Mikhail, why are you being so obedient too?’

Whenever I turned my head away from him, he was perfectly capable of chasing me around.

But now Mikhail stood rooted to the spot, staring at my brother with terribly lonely eyes.

He opened his mouth several times as though he wanted to say something, but my brother’s rejection was too firm.

How long did that uncomfortable silence continue?

It was Mikhail who finally let out a soft sigh.

“Fine. Must be nice having a little sister.”

At those words, Brother Damian, who had been looking away, turned his head.

His expression suggested that he suddenly realized he’d made a mistake.

‘He looks hurt, even though he’s the one who said it.’

And it wasn’t only my brother who looked hurt.

Mikhail did too.

Another suffocating silence settled between them.

‘The problem with these two is that they’re children who don’t act like children.’

Ordinary six- or seven-year-olds would probably be arguing endlessly, demanding that the other apologize.

But both of them were more thoughtful than other children their age.

No, perhaps they were even more considerate of others than some immature adults.

‘If I leave them like this, the rift between them will become serious.’

If either of them couldn’t endure this silence and walked out, that would be the end of it.

Besides, I wasn’t an idiot.

‘The reason Brother is behaving like this…’

It was because of me.

Ha. I never dreamed there would come a day when I’d have thoughts like this.

‘What am I, the heroine of some drama? Why am I thinking something so embarrassing?’

To me, it was harder to imagine than reincarnating a hundred times.

But I wasn’t foolish enough to overlook my brother’s discomfort.

It happened a few days earlier.

That brat had been following me around as usual, pestering me.

So I’d said one thing.

‘Awaiya, Miayi—’

‘You’re telling me to go away? Wait, did you just say my name?’

That single remark had caused all the trouble.

‘Did you hear that, Damian? The little princess said my name!’

And Mikhail, completely oblivious, had gone and bragged about it to my brother.

Embarrassingly enough, I still couldn’t properly pronounce my family’s names or titles.

After seeing my brother’s shocked expression that day, I had tried my hardest.

‘But all I can manage is something like “-ppa.”‘

Why was it that the vowels I could normally babble so easily refused to come out properly at times like this?

A baby’s mouth was truly a mysterious thing.

In fact, even before then, I had practiced saying Sister (“-ni!”), Daddy (“-ppa!”), and Mommy (“-maaa-“) by myself.

But I hadn’t actually called them those names because my pronunciation was so poor.

Of course, after seeing how shocked my brother was that day to learn I’d called Mikhail’s name first, I immediately changed my mind.

I called out to my brother right away.

“-Ppa!”

And that evening, whenever the other members of my family appeared, I did my best to call them too, however clumsily.

‘Until now, I always waited until I could pronounce things reasonably well before speaking to anyone.’

For one thing, I’d rarely interacted with others before reaching that age. And even when I did, those interactions were hardly affectionate.

‘That’s why I only started talking when I was four or five.’

Even at four or five, I knew my pronunciation might still be imperfect, so I avoided speaking in long sentences.

Naturally, I practiced diligently by myself every day.

I knew perfectly well that I wouldn’t improve without speaking aloud.

Because I’d lived that way for so long, I’d thought I should carefully prepare the words I used to call my family.

Since it would be the first time, I wanted them to remember beautiful words rather than some incomprehensible babbling.

Mikhail wasn’t family, and I didn’t particularly care whether he understood me, so I’d spoken however I pleased around him.

That was why I’d only been practicing alone until then…

‘Without realizing my brother would be so shocked…’

In any case, my family reacted far more enthusiastically than I’d ever imagined, even to those hopelessly clumsy attempts at speech.

‘Did you… did you just call Mommy, Anastasia? My baby, can you already say Mommy?’

A look of unmistakable joy spread across Mother’s normally composed and elegant face.

She looked happier than when I’d first smiled at her, or even when she’d held me after my birth.

‘Did… did our youngest just call me Daddy? Our youngest has already grown this much? Isn’t she growing too quickly? Sniff…’

Father, as expected, burst into tears.

While saying something incomprehensible about not wanting me to grow up too quickly.

‘Shasha, did you say Sister? Sister? Look! Shasha called me Sister! My little sister called me Sister!’

My sister was so excited that she repeated the same boast over and over.

Her words were spoken in Laurencia’s uniquely adorable way, sometimes slurred and sometimes perfectly clear.

And my brother…

‘Anastasia, you really are my little sister.’

As though he’d forgotten every trace of his earlier disappointment, he hugged me tightly.

As though he were relieved and reassured.

Mikhail, unaware of what was happening, merely looked bewildered.

To be honest, I didn’t want to blame Mikhail entirely.

‘He’s just like me. He doesn’t know any better.’

If I’d been in Mikhail’s position, would I have been able to behave any differently?

No, I might have been even clumsier than him.

‘Although I probably wouldn’t have formed a connection in the first place.’

Because I didn’t want to be hurt or hurt anyone else.

But Mikhail had no reason to think that way.

He was simply a six-year-old child.

And the same was true of my brother.

No matter how understanding or considerate he was, he couldn’t endure everything.

Everyone in my family was overflowing with affection for one another, and because of that, family always came first.

‘No matter how close Mikhail is to him.’

Besides, my brother had only just turned seven.

Because Mikhail seemed unusually fond of coming to see me, my brother had been enduring a great deal and yielding to him all this time.

‘Far more than Mikhail probably realizes.’

Originally, my brother had loved reading books aloud with my sister and me gathered in front of him after his lessons.

‘The first time he did it, he read such a thick, difficult book that my sister even cried.’

Nowadays, he carefully chose children’s storybooks with plenty of pictures and little text, ones that my sister and I would enjoy.

In the early afternoon, my sister and I would often fall asleep listening to my brother’s gentle, measured reading.

Then, around snack time…

‘Lara wants a snaaack.’

We would all wake up together, guided by my sister’s remarkably accurate internal snack clock.

It had become our own little daily routine.

But after Mikhail saved me, my brother willingly gave up that time.

‘And part of the reason Brother comes to my room later is that he stops by Sister’s room first.’

Mikhail always went home before evening.

My brother had been considerate of Mikhail, who had no siblings and whose only family was his grandfather.

Because Mikhail liked me, found me fascinating, and enjoyed spending time with me.

‘I really should have been more patient too…’

Once my body grew enough for me to walk properly, there would be plenty of things I could do for my family.

That made me impatient as well.

In any case, my brother had endured and compromised in so many ways, only for Mikhail to monopolize my first steps today.

And then he’d heard that I’d fallen.

That was when my brother finally exploded.

‘And yet I can see that both Brother and Mikhail are reflecting on their own actions.’

My brother regretted not being more considerate, while Mikhail regretted being careless.

‘Sigh. Things would be so much easier if they acted like ordinary children.’

Even now, their discomfort and consideration for one another were tangled together.

Perhaps because I’d spent so many lives in places where I constantly had to watch my back, I could sense this kind of atmosphere whether I wanted to or not.

‘It can’t be helped.’

It wasn’t a method I particularly liked.

But I wasn’t entirely blameless either.

And if these two ended up fighting like this, it would certainly drag on for a long time.

Because both of them thought too deeply.

My parents had been entrusted with Mikhail by Grand Duke Leventis, so they’d end up worrying about the situation as well.

‘So I’ll just have to swallow my pride this once.’

Let’s cry.

What else can I do with an ordinary baby’s body?

It was a choice I would never have made in any other world.

But I wasn’t stupid enough not to realize how precious I was to these two.

I gathered strength in my stomach and cried out at the top of my lungs.

“Waaaaah!”

“A-Anastasia?!”

“Baby?!”

“My lady!”

Everyone in the room cried out in surprise at my sudden wailing.

Even my regular weekly cries usually ended as little whimpers, and I hadn’t cried this loudly since saving the family physician’s life.

“Uoaaa, eeeaaa.”

Trying to speak while crying made my pronunciation even worse.

Still, both my brother and Mikhail realized I was trying to say something.

My brother immediately looked toward Mikhail.

“Sh-she says… it’s scary. She doesn’t like it… the baby.”

Mikhail dutifully translated, though he looked rather uncomfortable himself.

And both of these clever boys immediately understood what I found frightening and disliked.

“…Anastasia, your brother was wrong.”

“I was wrong too, baby.”

‘No, don’t apologize to me. Apologize to each other.’

Hoping they’d understand, I gradually quieted my crying and looked back and forth between them.

Mikhail was the first to speak, looking somewhat embarrassed.

“…I’m sorry. I put your precious little sister in danger.”

My brother patted my back as I sniffled from the aftermath of my loud crying.

“Me too… I’m sorry I told you not to come… I wasn’t trying to make you feel bad because I have a little sister…”

It seemed he particularly regretted bringing up Mikhail’s lack of family.

They really were such upright, well-behaved children that they might have stepped straight out of a picture.

So much so that I wondered whether they were friends precisely because they were so alike.

But what Mikhail said next surprised me even more.

“You know, Damian. I don’t have a little sister, so I don’t really understand. Could you teach me?”

“Uh…”

The moment Mikhail mentioned not having a younger sister, my brother’s expression stiffened.

Mikhail quickly waved his hands and corrected himself.

“I’m not saying what you said was bad. That’s not what I mean… I really just don’t know. If you tell me, I’ll do exactly what you say.”

Scratching his cheek shyly, Mikhail continued.

“You told me to be polite to the little princess, so I tried to be polite. And when you told me not to touch her, I really didn’t touch her without permission.”

Ah, so that’s why he never simply grabbed my hand without asking.

“So teach me. I… I don’t really know what’s dangerous.”

Mikhail cautiously approached my brother and me, then extended his hand awkwardly.

“Hm?”

This child really was kind and generous-hearted too.

My brother stared at Mikhail in surprise for a moment before taking his hand.

“Yeah… I’m really sorry, Mikhail.”

“Then we’ve made up, right?”

“Yeah.”

“And I can keep coming to see the little princess?”

At Mikhail’s question, my brother looked slightly reluctant for a moment before answering with a faint smile.

“All right.”