How to Survive as a Genius Spy in the Game Chapter 282 - Reorganization (3)

To be honest, I wasn’t unaware of Erendil’s feelings. I had sensed it for a while and recognized that it was growing.

In fact, the reason I came to the empire was partly aimed at this. Of course, it wasn’t my intention, but Haisen’s.

Judging purely by ability, there were other agents who were more skilled than I was at the time. Although being recognized as a ‘mystic’ by ‘winds’ in a short time played a big role, appearance couldn’t be left out.

Of course, that wasn’t the main goal. Making Erendil, who was a princess, into an emperor was an extremely difficult process in itself.

While appearance wasn’t the core reason, it did have an influence as seduction was a secondary objective. In truth, everything was uncertain at that time.

From Haisen’s perspective, it was questionable whether Erendil, who ascended to the throne with their help, would continue to maintain the relationship.

In such a situation, capturing the princess’s heart would be even better. The difference in status would be meaningless in front of the emperor’s orders.

‘I was also told to maintain the best possible relationship with the princess.’

Of course, such seduction tactics held absolutely no value to me once I arrived in Chenarus. My top priority was to make Erendil the emperor.

Also, Erendil was too young, and I was aware that she possessed the Mystic Power to see the truth, so I thought it was meaningless.

Although I hadn’t thought about it at all in that way, I understood to some extent how the situation had turned out like this. Even I could see why.

Erendil had lived like an isolated island in the imperial palace until I came. No, it was worse than an isolated island, as she was ignored despite being of royal blood.

It wasn’t simply because Erendil’s position started to change with my arrival. My loyalty and conviction from when she had nothing, plus risking my life for her, must have had a big impact.

It wasn’t done with seduction as the goal. Even risking my life to prevent the terrorist attack during the triumphal ceremony was the result of instinctive action.

Without Erendil, my end would have been death anyway. It meant I had no choice.

‘But from Erendil’s perspective, it probably doesn’t feel that way.’

If I imagined the opposite situation happening to me, I would likely have had good feelings towards Erendil too. However, I had never seriously thought about this.

Erendil is still young. Those emotions could easily fade like the fever of first love, and it was hard enough just focusing on my own situation.

They say love blooms even in times of war, but knowing the future of this world, I couldn’t just accept it positively.

To be honest, for a very long time, I considered such things to be luxurious emotions for me.

Of course, things have changed a bit lately. I don’t think even the small moments of happiness when meeting Denif or Orhen are unnecessary.

‘Still, this is different from that.’

I still have uncertainties about the future. Even if we defeat the Great Devil as planned. It can’t be helped.

I’m a person who entered into a game, after all. I don’t know what will happen to me when everything is over. Whether I’ll return to reality or remain here, that can only be known when the time comes.

Because of this uncertain future, I’ve tended to avoid expanding relationships. Denif became close to me by bulldozing his way through like a force of nature.

That was the limit for now. If I never see my friends again, it would be painful, but better than other emotions.

“……”

The lengthening of my thoughts soon led to a lengthening of silence. Erendil’s eyes, which had been staring at me while boldly speaking, were now wavering.

Her face was flushed with embarrassment that seemed to have belatedly rushed in, even as it reflected the moonlight. It was as if the heat in her face could be visually transmitted.

I could understand why Erendil chose to bring this up today. Because we don’t know how the eastern expedition will turn out. With all the information she hears as emperor, her anxiety must be great too.

She must have spoken so honestly, even like this, fearing she might never get to express her feelings otherwise.

“Your Majesty, that cannot be.”

Nevertheless, I couldn’t give Erendil the answer she wanted. My future is uncertain. My feelings might be too. Erendil only raised the corners of her mouth.

Of course, it wasn’t a smiling face. Should I say she was flustered, though she had considered this situation? Erendil’s lips quivered for a moment before she continued.

“…Perhaps there is another woman in your heart?”

“That’s not it.”

Erendil nodded her head. As if she knew it, with a feeling of ‘if that’s the case, then…’

“If not, is it that you don’t like me?”

Her gaze was intense. It was a confident look. As if she was anticipating my answer. I shook my head.

“That’s not it either.”

Erendil nodded her head once more. Objectively speaking, who wouldn’t like Erendil? She was the most beautiful person I had seen since coming here. Her character is also excellent, and her status goes without saying.

The flood of marriage proposals that poured in as Erendil’s influence grew when she was a princess was proof of that. Erendil’s expression brightened a little at my words.

“Then may I know the reason?”

“It’s because the future is uncertain.”

It might sound like I’m beating around the bush, but this was the truth. Of course, Erendil would think it’s because of the final battle with the Great Devil.

“I spoke because that future is uncertain.”

Erendil looked at me with a somewhat displeased expression. She knew that too.

“I cannot do that.”

“Are you saying this out of consideration for me?”

Well. It wasn’t easy to answer. I found it hard to be certain of my own feelings as well. In a way, is that also for Erendil’s sake? To avoid hurting her?

It was awkward. Before entering the game, I wasn’t such a frustrating person. It’s not an excuse, but wouldn’t anyone be like this in my situation?

“Then does that mean it would be alright after everything is settled?”

“…I’m grateful and sorry, but I think we’ll have to see when that time comes.”

Erendil closed her mouth and took a deep breath through her nose. Fortunately, or should I say fortunately, she didn’t seem disappointed or hurt by my words.

Only the dissatisfaction on her face deepened. Erendil, who had been glaring at me, opened her mouth.

“Do you remember what I said at the villa?”

“……”

“I feel like I’m going crazy, because of one stupid man.”

I lowered my gaze, feeling burdened by that look.

“Are you pretending not to know, or do you really not know?”

Those words hit differently than when I heard them at the villa.

“I’m sorry.”

“That’s not the answer I want.”

“……”

I was about to apologize once more but just closed my mouth. In fact, my thought process wasn’t working well, as if my brain had malfunctioned.

Even just now, it seems the word ‘sorry’ didn’t fit the situation. Erendil sighed softly.

“It’s alright. Let’s hear your answer then.”

“Thank you for understanding.”

Erendil whipped her head around to look at me. Hmm, this response doesn’t seem to fit either.

“There’s nothing to be sorry or thankful for. As I said earlier, my heart is already yours. And my heart is not easily swayed.”

Erendil turned her gaze back to view the scenery of Chenarus. In the reflected moonlight, Erendil’s green eyes were vivid beneath her shining golden hair.

“And in my thinking, your heart is already mine too. You just haven’t realized it yet. Or you’re pretending not to know.”

Erendil’s cheeks reddened as she spoke while looking at the white city. I remained silent.

“Get some rest. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yes, Your Majesty. Rest well.”

Erendil glared at me playfully.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to rest well, because of a stupid man.”

“……”

“I’m not joking.”

It seems she wasn’t looking at me playfully after all.

***

“Did you have a fight with Her Majesty yesterday?”

The next morning, as soon as I entered the imperial palace to board the dragon carriage heading east, Rudehrn approached and asked.

“What are you suddenly talking about?”

I tilted my head and asked back. I’m not sure if that should be considered a fight, but how did Rudehrn know about it?

“The dragon carriage assignments have changed. Her Majesty always rode with you, didn’t she?”

Rudehrn shrugged.

“But today you’re riding a different carriage? Even I can see it clearly, can’t you?”

What can’t I see? As I remained silent, Rudehrn chuckled like an old man. Well, come to think of it, he is older than an old man.

“It’s disrespectful to say this, but Her Majesty has a cute side too. Seeing how she specifically excluded you after a small quarrel.”

“We didn’t particularly fight.”

As I spoke firmly, Rudehrn looked at me with mischievous eyes.

“Yesterday, that is, the day before heading east, Her Majesty called for you, but I heard you went back early.”

What is this old man saying? Unable to speak rudely, I frowned at Rudehrn.

Rudehrn clicked his tongue and gently pushed my shoulder with his own.

“Hmm. I understand you’re being cautious, but I’m disappointed.”

“…What are you disappointed about?”

My tone unconsciously became aggressive. Rudehrn also seemed slightly surprised.

“Haha, this guy. How frustrating. Well, I was like that too. This is why Sword Masters have a hard time finding someone compatible.”

“……”

“Oh, I can see it clearly just by looking at Her Majesty’s and your eyes. How long are you going to keep this up?”

I can understand Erendil’s gaze, but the rest is a bit hard to comprehend. I couldn’t help but ask back.

“My eyes?”

“You… Hmm, weren’t you being cautious? Well, I guess that’s why you became a Sword Master at that age?”

It’s not that I don’t understand what he means. Of course I knew. I just found it strange that my gaze had changed.

“Is my gaze different?”

“……”

Rudehrn didn’t answer. Instead, he seemed to be cursing me as an idiot with his eyes. From afar, word came that the dragon carriages would depart soon.

“Tsk, never mind. You just focus on defeating the Great Devil.”

Rudehrn said that and turned his back. My head becomes complicated again from the morning. Erendil’s words yesterday…

I thought it was an outpouring of confidence or a misunderstanding about me saving her.

Well, it’s not important right now. It’s time to head east. Yesterday is already past.

Didn’t we agree to talk after everything is over? This is an issue to think about when that time comes.

If things don’t go well with the final battle against the Great Devil, it won’t matter, and even if it’s handled well, I need to remain here for it to be an issue.

I sighed and boarded the dragon carriage. After about 20 minutes of flight, Denif suddenly spoke to me.

“Why are you fiddling with your sword so much? Are you nervous about something? That’s not like you.”

“Me?”

At Denif’s words, I noticed my hands were fidgeting with the handle of Moonlight. I shook my head.

“Just thinking about the battle with the Great Devil.”

I made that excuse and turned my gaze to the window. Whew, now it was really time to think about the final battle in the east.