I’m Just a Counselor Chapter 43

Without taking his eyes off me, he said.

 

“I don’t know how to treat you.”

 

I rolled my eyes to avoid his gaze, then pursed my lips like I was cornered.

 

“You could just… do what you’ve been doing.”

 

Jeremiah smirked at my timid response. I stared at him, still.

 

He said he didn’t know how to treat me, but the truth was, I didn’t know how to treat him either.

 

I can’t just treat him as Estella’s brother, I can’t just think of him as an employer, and I can’t just treat him like any other client.

 

But the way he reacted the other day when I asked him if we were friends, I don’t think we are.

 

‘The suitor thing was just a joke…’

 

It’s always hard to be in a relationship where you can’t define it. I can’t gauge my distance from the other person, especially when Jeremiah suddenly approaches me like he did today.

 

I wasn’t sure if I should step back a little further and keep my distance, or if I should take a step forward like he did.

 

He said I was drawing a line in the sand, but in reality, I hadn’t properly gauged my distance from him and was acting rashly.

 

“By the way, do you know, Duke…”

 

Once again, I failed to gauge my distance from him, so I decided to change the subject.

 

I coughed a few times, casually turning my head away to avoid eye contact, and sat down carefully across from Jeremiah, watching his eyes as I spoke.

 

“That I, um… from a noble family.”

 

Jeremiah didn’t interrupt me, but instead, he was receptive to the conversation.

 

“If you mean that Miss Vanessa is the only daughter of Viscount Asell, I am, of course, aware of that.”

 

So Jeremiah did know, I thought, though I’d been thinking about it ever since Shane had revealed that there was an organization called the Winter Crown that he couldn’t possibly not know about.

 

I’d been thinking that Jeremiah’s personality would make a background check on my sudden closeness to Estella essential…

 

“So you’ve been waiting for me to say something all this time?”

 

Well, that. It’s kind of scary because I feel like he’s been waiting.

 

I glanced at Jeremiah again.

 

‘Well, he doesn’t seem too upset right now.’

 

Of course, it’s not that hiding my status as a fallen noble is a big deal, or that it’s a crime in and of itself.

 

But there’s also the matter of morality… and what if Jeremiah is unhappy that I think he’s lied to.

 

I placed my hands in my lap and spoke as politely as I could.

 

“That… Viscount Asell’s name has probably already been wiped off the noble rolls, and that… he’s been kicked out for being broke is something I’ve been too ashamed to tell the Duke until now.”

 

“I see.”

 

“Did… you feel bad about it?”

 

Jeremiah didn’t answer my question, but his eyes twinkled and he smiled.

 

I blinked back tears at the smile.

 

‘There it is. He was upset.’

 

I don’t know what Jeremiah was thinking as he watched me remain silent.

 

I fidgeted with my hands in unnecessary anxiety.

 

‘Maybe he was thinking about kicking me out of the ducal castle…’

 

No, he wouldn’t have given me an office or anything.

 

I shook my head to clear my mind of my sinister imagination.

 

He was still smiling, all the way to his eyes. As if he thought it was funny that I was fidgeting by myself.

 

I finally relaxed. It was clear that he didn’t really care that much about my fooling him now anyway.

 

Still, I apologized again, just in case.

 

“I’m really sorry I didn’t tell you beforehand.”

 

“Miss Vanessa doesn’t have to tell me everything, and you didn’t even tell me you knew Shane.”

 

“……?”

 

His brow furrowed slightly at the mention of Shane’s name. I looked at him with a puzzled expression.

 

‘Why does he seem to think this is more important than the fact that I’m from a fallen aristocracy?’

 

‘Is it because Shane is important to him?’

 

I suppose I could be worried that Shane might have gotten involved with me for some strange reason.

 

I felt a little embarrassed, so I opened up to him.

 

“Shane and I met when I first came to Hazel three years ago, and he helped me settle up in the north.”

 

“Did you have any weird…… no, problems with him?”

 

I stare at Jeremiah, who asks probingly, and then shake my head.

 

“Well, the first time I met Shane, he was in the form of Sherry… a girl.”

 

“Oh. So you’re saying that Shane approached Miss Vanessa under a false identity?”

 

“Yep. I only just found out that he’s… a man.”

 

“And you weren’t upset when you found out?”

 

‘Why does this feel like Jeremiah is really interrogating me?’

 

I tilted my head at Jeremiah’s persistent questioning.

 

But he had a very serious look on his face, and I didn’t think I could ask him a question like, “Why are you asking me that?” here.

 

Eventually, I meekly answered his probing questions.

 

“I was mad at him, but we made up, because I consider him a friend, and he said he is.”

 

“…doesn’t sound like just a friend.”

 

Jeremiah muttered with a small snort. It sounded like he was talking to Shane, not me.

 

‘Was something going on between him and Jeremiah?’

 

I looked at Jeremiah curiously, but he didn’t seem to notice my gaze as he pondered something.

 

‘Hmm, I wonder if he and Shane talked about something important.’

 

Maybe it would be awkward for me to ask.

 

As I stifled my curiosity, Jeremiah spoke up.

 

“That day, Miss Vanessa said she was worried that I was disappointed in you, but I was the one who was really worried, that you were disappointed in me.”

 

My eyes widened at the suddenness of his words.

 

“So I thought maybe you were going to say you were going to leave the Duke’s castle.”

 

“Uh…”

 

“Just, I thought… it would be nice if you stayed right here.”

 

I pressed the back of my hand to my lips in a panic, feeling like I was about to burst out laughing even though I wasn’t in a situation to laugh.

 

‘So Jeremiah is saying that he was worried I’d quit and go back to work after all?’

 

If that’s what he was saying, I’d heard it before during the day. To Estella.

 

“I’ve been worried that you might go back with Shane.”

 

Maybe that’s why Jeremiah asked about Shane, too?

 

Of course, I could be imagining things, but it was so cute that the siblings had similar thoughts.

 

‘Oh no. He’s going to get mad if I start laughing when we’re having a serious conversation.’

 

Jeremiah, who didn’t seem to notice my uncontrollable giggling, continued, his eyes still slightly downcast.

 

“Miss Vanessa, I’m not used to being blunt, but you seem to like being blunt, so let’s put it this way.”

 

“…….”

 

“I want you to stay by my side, even if you’re disappointed in me.”

 

So Jeremiah was trying to convince me not to leave now. Or that the professor wants to do a PhD program with me.

 

If I quit, Estella will be sad… and Jeremiah might lose another night.

 

From his point of view, he’s saying this because my presence is useful in many ways.

 

But against my better judgment, my heart leaps with one loud thud.

 

Snow was still piling up on the windowsill, and a fire was blazing in the fireplace.

 

His silver eyelashes fluttered, catching the flames and turning them a pale scarlet. The air around him was spring-like.

 

“…….”

 

Ah, I can’t fathom it again. How close we are.

 

I stared blankly into his face, forgetting to laugh.

 

His light green eyes, which had been looking down as if he was afraid to meet my gaze, looked up when he didn’t answer.

 

“…Miss Vanessa?”

 

I coughed out a small gulp.

 

After all… he’d spoken so bluntly, it was my turn to answer him. Even though I hadn’t planned on dropping the duke’s last name in the first place.

 

“Don’t worry, Duke.”

 

I couldn’t bring myself to hug Jeremiah like I had Estella, so instead I smiled as brightly as I could.

 

“You said I could count on you, and I believe you, so I’ll-”

 

“…….”

 

“I’ll stay by your side, Duke, if you’ll let me.”

 

And with that, my second exclusive contract with Jeremiah was sealed.