Love Born of Pity Chapter 84

Kwon Jiho opened the living room and kitchen windows and put all the groceries into the refrigerator. He had no idea why his stomach was so upset. He planned to soothe his stomach with the cool breeze and then figure out what he could cook after resting.

He had never cooked before, so he worried about messing up the food, but he felt at ease when he thought that whatever happened, he would be the one eating it.

“I was a fool who couldn’t do anything on my own……”

When he was in school, his mom cooked for him, and after that, he was busy earning money for Kwon Heeyeon’s hospital bills, so he always ate convenience store lunch boxes or triangle kimbap for meals. The only things he had made with his own hands were ramen or heating up curry.

He knew he would naturally get better at cooking with practice, but right now, he had neither the energy nor the motivation to make anything. He belatedly closed the windows he had left open until the once-warm interior had become chilly.

“My stomach…… feels so bad. Did I get indigestion?”

An unexplainable anxiety slowly crept over him. He hadn’t eaten much on his way here, but it wasn’t like he hadn’t eaten at all. And he tended to get indigestion even from just drinking water when he was uncomfortable. Maybe that’s why he kept feeling nauseous. Surely… it couldn’t be a pregnancy. The fact that he hadn’t used contraception when he was with Do Yeonjae kept bothering him.

No, it’s not that easy to get pregnant. It can’t be. There’s no way a baby would come to someone like me again.

Biting his short fingernails, he paced around anxiously before collapsing in a corner of the living room. He anxiously scanned the unfamiliar interior, then squeezed his eyes shut. His heart was beating so fast it hurt.

But, what if a baby really has come? Even as he sat in front of the living room window overlooking the wooden porch and watched the scenery outside, bad thoughts kept creeping in. I should have just died. It would have been better if I had died then. His spirits sank. He lay down on the thick rug and pulled the blanket at his feet up over himself.

His breaths were long, in and out, trying to soothe his queasy stomach. He sniffled and cried for a long time again. He should have bought a test when he bought the emergency medicine. He hadn’t even thought about it, so he had walked right past the omega pregnancy tests on the pharmacy shelf.

I’m so stupid. So incredibly dumb. Kwon Jiho, cursing himself internally, felt his eyelids gradually grow heavy. Soft, shallow breaths flowed past his chapped white lips. His exhausted mind instantly swallowed Kwon Jiho into a deep sleep.

How much time had passed like that? Kwon Jiho was woken up by the sound of tapping on the glass. He shot up, startled. Thinking that Do Yeonjae had finally come to the island to catch him, he even let out a scream.

Terrified, he scrambled towards the kitchen, and the large figure standing on the wooden porch outside the glass window held a flashlight under its chin. Witnessing a scene straight out of a horror movie, Kwon Jiho squeezed his eyes shut.

“Hyung! Hyung!”

“Haaak, ugh, huh……”

“It’s me, Seongho. The chief’s grandson. Grandpa told me to come up and check because the lights weren’t on in the house. Are you okay?”

Ha Seongho, with a clearly startled expression, knocked on the door worriedly.

“I didn’t mean to scare you……”

Kwon Jiho felt the illusion that his thumping heartbeat was ringing in his ears. He clutched his chest, then wiped the cold sweat that had beaded on his forehead with the back of his hand. He lowered his head and held his breath for quite a while to calm down.

Then, bothered by Ha Seongho still peeking inside from the outside, he stood up. The hand he reached out to open the door was trembling. He clenched and unclenched his fist in the air before unlocking the door, and Ha Seongho, who had been on the porch, quickly ran to the entrance and stepped inside.

“Hyung, were you really scared?”

Perhaps because the flashlight was shining in his eyes, Kwon Jiho frowned. He covered his eyes with his hand and nodded. Ha Seongho, saying, “Sorry, sorry,” turned the light away.

“No, it’s just that my grandpa worries a lot. He doesn’t want anything bad to happen to an outsider who’s just come here… Not that I think you would do anything.”

“……Ah, yes. I know.”

As he nodded in response, his fine hair swayed gently. Along with the warmth, a soft, sweet scent tinged with a faint smell of sweat wafted through the air.

“Dinner, uh……. It’s time for dinner……. The lights, uh, the lights, where to turn them on is……”

In the dark interior, Ha Seongho was taking off his shoes when he suddenly thought Kwon Jiho seemed frightened and leaned back.

“May I come in?”

“……Yes, you can come in.”

“Then, excuse me for a moment, I’ll just turn on the lights for you.”

Stepping into the house where only Kwon Jiho was present, Ha Seongho greeted him cheerfully and strode forward. He fumbled along the living room wall and pressed the switch, and the entire house lit up.

“Here, if you press this, you can turn everything on and off. There’s a sticker, but if you press these one by one, you can turn them on and off individually. You can probably turn them on and off from the bed too. There’s a switch.”

“Thank you for telling me.”

“By the way, hyung, you haven’t eaten? I don’t smell any food. It’s gotten pretty late.”

“I was tired, so I put it in the fridge to eat after resting.”

“Ah, I’m not doubting you. It’s just, in case……”

Kwon Jiho, who had been anxiously looking at Ha Seongho’s face as he trailed off, turned his head. What’s weird? What is he not doubting? Did he find out I’m an omega? Did he find out I hid my secondary gender? What on earth…

“You can’t cook, right?”

“……Pardon?”

“Because your hand is injured. It looks like it would be difficult to cook. Is that why you haven’t eaten?”

He meant it literally, that it would be difficult to prepare food with that hand. He had trailed off so meaningfully that Kwon Jiho had become rigid enough for his whole body to stiffen, but then the tension was released. He let out a long sigh, looked at his own hand, and shook his head slightly. He hid his left hand behind his back and opened his mouth.

“It’s my left hand, so it’s fine. I can do it.”

“I was going to offer to make you something simple if you said it was difficult, but I’m glad to hear that. Still… should I make you something? Is it a bit uncomfortable to have someone else cook for you? Since we just met today?”

“……I suppose so.”

“Alright then, yup. I’ll be heading down now.”

“Goodbye.”

Ha Seongho, taking the largest strides possible, crossed the living room and slipped his feet into the slippers he had taken off.

“Um……”

“……Yes?”

“I’m not trying to bother you, but I’m going fishing tomorrow, would you like to come with me? There’s really nothing to do if you’re here alone. Time doesn’t melt away. Whatever you do, it’s beyond your imagination.”

It passed just fine. Kwon Jiho retraced the day that had flowed by as if someone had stolen his time. Ha Seongho added that Kwon Jiho should think about it and let him know tomorrow morning. He opened the front door as if to leave, then turned his head back again and stared at Kwon Jiho.

“Should I make you some fried rice?”

“……No. Thank you, I’m not refusing because I’m uncomfortable…… I just don’t feel like eating anything right now.”

“Then potatoes, the potatoes my grandpa gave you are really delicious. He grew them himself. Try boiling them until they’re floury. They’re perfect for when you have no appetite. They’re to die for with kimchi.”

“I’ll try it.”

The door closed with a bright smile and a ‘see you tomorrow.’ Kwon Jiho, left alone, let out a small sigh, but before the door lock could engage, it burst open again. Kwon Jiho’s eyes widened. Startled, he even took a step back.

“Want some… ramen? I can bring some over right away.”

He certainly hadn’t felt hungry. The thought of eating something hadn’t crossed his mind in the slightest, but at the question of whether he wanted ramen, his stomach suddenly churned.

“Seafood ramen. With abalone, conch, shrimp, and octopus. It’s really delicious.”

“……”

“I’m being too nosy. Get some rest.”

Ha Seongho, scratching his cheek and smiling sheepishly, pulled his body out the door.

“I, I……”

At that moment, Kwon Jiho, his lips moving, swallowed the saliva that had pooled in his mouth and muttered that he wanted to eat it. Ha Seongho told him to wait a moment and turned around quickly. Pat, pat, pat, the sound of his footsteps crossing the garden was fast.

Kwon Jiho, finding the suddenly quiet space strange, moved towards the living room window. After pacing around restlessly, he looked out at the village, which was mostly dark because the streetlights were too far apart. Did he get down okay? He suddenly worried about Ha Seongho who had gone down the dark path. So that’s why he was holding a flashlight…

“If it’s that dark, of course he’d have to carry one.”

Kwon Jiho muttered quietly and turned around. He thought it would be better to wash his face to clear his head. He went into the bathroom and gasped when he saw the glass ceiling.

“……Wow.”

It looked as if countless stars were about to pour down. He forgot what he was about to do and was completely engrossed in watching the night sky. It was only after a long while, when he heard a knock on the front door, that he hurried outside.

Ha Seongho, who was pacing on the wooden porch, saw Kwon Jiho and smiled brightly. His hands were full of bags of seafood.