Actually, It’s a Messy Melodrama Chapter 43

“It’s just that… if you have any difficulties that I don’t know about, don’t hesitate to tell me.”

So Taejun took a step back. It wasn’t a problem that could be solved by being impatient. Since he would be living with Cha Haeshin anyway, he had earned time to get to know him.

“I told you. I’ll help, so just tell me.”

Taejun put strength into each and every syllable, hoping his feelings would reach Haeshin just as they were.

“Anything is fine. I’ll even gladly listen to your nonsense. So… tell me anything. That’s what I mean when I say I’ll help you.”

Because if you are repeating an endless misfortune, I can share even that. Because only I can share your misfortune.

Haeshin’s eyes wavered again. Was it because he’d heard an unusual question? It wasn’t the first time he’d heard an offer of help, but for some reason, his heart pounded. For a fleeting moment, he felt that it might be okay to tell this person everything. Even though he knew it couldn’t be true.

“You’re already helping me so much….”

“I know. But I’m saying I can do more.”

Haeshin had met many people in his life who tried to help him. He had received undeserved kindness many times. But even for Haeshin, the goodwill Taejun was showing was excessively overwhelming. What was surprising was that Taejun’s feelings didn’t feel burdensome.

Haeshin bit his lip. One wrong move and the time he had spent enduring alone, clenching his teeth, felt like it would come spilling out of his mouth. He wanted to say it, even if Taejun couldn’t solve it.

Taejun, who had been watching Haeshin bite his lip, carefully moved his fingers to release the captive lip. In the silent living room, only the sound of their two breaths could be heard clearly.

There were so many things they wanted to say that they couldn’t say anything at all. Their gazes fiercely intertwined, trying to read each other’s hearts and convey their own.

Without realizing it, Taejun took another step towards Haeshin. He could feel Haeshin’s breath on the tip of his nose. In his ears, he could only hear the pounding of his own heart. It felt as if only Cha Haeshin and he were left in the world.

He wanted to know more about Cha Haeshin. He wanted to let him know more about the person named Han Taejun. He didn’t want to be lonely and thought he hoped Cha Haeshin wouldn’t be lonely. He wanted to be happy and wished Cha Haeshin would be less unhappy. Taejun slowly lowered his head towards Haeshin.

“……Sir!”

At that moment, Haeshin shoved Taejun’s chest with a thump and pulled away. Taejun’s hand, which had been cupping Haeshin’s cheek, fell away in an instant, and a distance was created between them.

“Cha Haeshin……?”

Taejun, still unable to shake off the dazed feeling, blankly called Haeshin’s name. Haeshin smiled awkwardly and opened his mouth.

“Th-that, uh, thank you so much for just the thought. If I need help with anything, I’ll, I’ll be sure to tell you. It’s getting late, so you should get some sleep too, sir. I’ll be heading back to my room now.”

Taejun couldn’t even properly respond to Haeshin’s words, which poured out like a machine gun.

“Well then, sleep well!”

And only after Haeshin had scurried back to his room did Taejun raise both hands to clutch his head.

“What the hell……!”

What on earth was he trying to do? Was he really trying to kiss Cha Haeshin? It made no sense, but his actions just now were, to anyone’s eyes, an act of craving a kiss. If Cha Haeshin hadn’t pushed him away, he would have definitely kissed him.

He couldn’t breathe, and his vision swam. It felt like his heart would leap out of his mouth.

Can a person kiss someone out of sympathy?

Holding a question he couldn’t ask anyone in his heart, Taejun had to stand blankly in the middle of the living room for a long while.

☂️

“Are you crazy?”

Returning to his room, Haeshin leaned his back against the door and muttered, covering his lips with the back of his hand. He didn’t know who was crazy, but it was certain that the situation was crazy.

Did Han Taejun really try to kiss me? Logically, it made no sense, but recalling the situation from a moment ago, he couldn’t help but think so. It was so absurd that it felt like a dream.

It seemed Han Taejun had had too much to drink. Otherwise, there’s no way he would have felt such an impulse towards him.

Of course, Haeshin had already received Jin Youngmin’s crazy advances, and even besides Jin Youngmin, he had received no small number of confessions in his life. But that was that, and Han Taejun was a different story, wasn’t he? No matter how he thought about it, someone like Han Taejun liking him just didn’t make sense.

Does he want to have sex with me?

As soon as that thought came to mind, Haeshin shook his head frantically. That didn’t make sense either. If Taejun wanted to, there was no one he couldn’t drag into his bed, so why him? But then, why did he do that just now? Can a person feel so much sympathy that they just want to kiss someone?

The nonsensical thoughts spun around in place. None of it made sense. And the most nonsensical of all those nonsensical thoughts was.

“I almost really did it.”

It was his own heart, which had been on the verge of closing its eyes without him even realizing.

Watching Taejun approach, his heart, ridiculously, pounded. No, his heart had been pounding even before that. From the moment Taejun had gently raised his hand to cover his forehead and cup his cheek, Haeshin’s heart had been racing, and he’d felt dazed, as if drugged.

It was the same when he realized he had misspoken to Taejun. Normally, he would have been more on guard and tense, but even in his flustered state, his heart strangely relaxed. He even felt like giving in and telling him everything.

“Dangerous. This is dangerous….”

Haeshin muttered as he slid down with his back against the door and slumped onto the floor. Had he still not come to his senses even after experiencing Jin Youngmin?

After being horrifically killed by Youngmin, Haeshin had vowed never again to make a person his salvation. He would use them as much as necessary, but he must never bet his entire self on them.

“Get a grip……”

Haeshin tapped his thigh with his fist. The situation had changed too quickly, and he had been sick last night, so his heart must have been shaken in various ways.

He had to get a firm grip. A single mistake could make him lose everything he had built in this round. Haeshin once again collected his wits. A complicated and dizzying night was passing.

☂️

“Sir, you’re awake!”

The next morning, Taejun, having washed up and come out to the living room, made a sour face at the sight of Haeshin greeting him like a gangster’s lackey again. He had no idea where he’d learned such a greeting, and he found it extremely displeasing.

Thinking about what happened last night made the greeting even more unpleasant to see. Thanks to the strange, hard-to-describe atmosphere, Taejun had slept poorly again, but the gangster-like greeting Cha Haeshin seemed completely bright and energetic. As if he didn’t even remember yesterday’s events. For some reason, he felt a sense of unfairness.

“Don’t greet me like that.”

“Huh? I was trying to be polite, don’t you like it?”

“No. I don’t like it. What am I, a gang boss?”

The word ‘gang’ coming from Taejun’s mouth felt strangely out of place, and Haeshin burst out laughing.

“You’re laughing?”

“No, sir. I’m not. Yes, I won’t greet you like that anymore. Please, go have your meal.”

“What about you?”

“I already ate.”

Only then did Taejun’s gaze scan Haeshin from top to bottom. Dressed neatly, Haeshin seemed to be all ready to go out.

“What, are you leaving?”

“Yes. I have to go to work.”

“Are you really planning on continuing to work?”

Taejun frowned. First, he didn’t like the idea of him going to a workplace with no one to protect him when he didn’t know when Jin Youngmin might show up, and he also didn’t like Cha Haeshin trying to run off as if escaping when they hadn’t even had a proper conversation about yesterday’s events yet.

He wanted to snatch away the positions of all those damned bosses who were so important just because they gave him money. In fact, he was confident he could give him much more money. Cha Haeshin probably knew that fact too. Since he had already conveyed his intentions through Secretary Choi. Yet, Haeshin had not given him any particular answer.

“Um, I am thinking about it. But I have to go quickly now, so I’ll tell you after I get back. I’ll be going first. Enjoy your meal!”

Haeshin rushed out of the house before Taejun could say anything more. Staring at his retreating back with a vacant expression, Taejun soon looked sullen. He was pretending to be unfazed, but Taejun could tell. The fact that Cha Haeshin was deliberately pretending not to know about what happened yesterday.

Is he offended? Does he not even want to talk about it? Does he think I liked doing that? Complaints that weren’t even sincere instantly filled his head. What was more irritating was himself, worrying about Haeshin’s safety in the midst of it all.

“Sir, would you like to have your meal?”

As Taejun fumed for a good while, feeling resentful and wronged, the housekeeper, Yeonghwa, approached and spoke to him. Taejun gave a short “Yes” and walked towards the kitchen.

What Han Taejun, his head completely filled with thoughts of Cha Haeshin, couldn’t know was that Yeonghwa had been inwardly flustered by the expression on Taejun’s face, one she had never seen in the many years she had worked in this house.