Wandering Through – Vol. 1 Chapter 19 – Imprisonment

Author: Nikss

In the middle of the night, her eyes suddenly awakened.

Yiseo squirmed, feeling the tightness of the arms holding her from behind. The man who would normally have woken her up at the slightest flinch was still.

‘Well, the usual.’

Yiseo scoffed inwardly. When had it become normal for this man to fall asleep holding her?

It was not until she pushed his heavy arm away and tried to free herself from his embrace that she realized they were still connected underneath.

She winced at how much of the thick, half-erect member was lodged in her bottom.

As she leaned forward, the lump slipped out.

The liquid he’d poured inside her the night before trickled down her inner thighs. She shuddered at the wetness and slipped out of his arms.

Crawling out of the blankets, Yi sank to the floor. Surprisingly, he hadn’t woken up yet, and for the first time, Yseo was able to see him sleep.

“…”

Deep in slumber, he was as still as dead. Yiseo blinked, her eyes adjusting to the darkness.

He looked calm. He looked content, even somewhat elated.

But Yiseo was not. She was sick, miserable, and anxious.

‘You wanted me to be like this. Are you satisfied that you got what you wanted?’

Why you wanted me to be miserable, I don’t know.

— “You promised me you’d love me no matter what I did.”

Because no matter how many times I asked, your answer was always the same.

— “You said you’d love me no matter what I did to you…whether I molested you, beat you, or killed you. You have to prove it.”

‘No matter how miserable I am at your hands, I have to prove I love you?’

Prove it? What happens when I prove it?

Do you give me a prize, kiss me tenderly, throw me out of my place, and marry me again?

…That doesn’t change what you did to me.

And yet I made a promise to you from a previous life that you keep talking about? Why? I don’t remember it, really?

Not just an excuse you made up because you wanted to trample me, really?

‘And if I can’t prove it? If I say I don’t love you anymore, after what you did to me…’

“…I’ll get punished.”

Yiseo muttered softly.

What kind of punishment would that be, killing me? I’d be dead anyway if this body was left alone, so what’s the point?

Better to die than to go on living like this.

How about I tell you I don’t love you anymore, and die by your hand, and there’s no one to mourn.

The truth was, I couldn’t make up my mind.

Aside from the fact that the man who had done this to me was horrible, the fact was that I still loved the prince from my past life.

They were not the same person.

The thought of Leegwang’s hands groping her body sent chills down her spine, but at the same time, her heart skipped a beat when he cared for her body the way he had in his previous life.

In the end, it was she who suffered from the disparity.

Yiseo turned her gaze away from the sleeping man.

It had been a long time since she’d been able to move alone. It was better to do something else than think about him.

When he was with her, she couldn’t bear to think of anything but him.

Thinking about him had to be a daily grind anyway.

The slightest glance away and his eyes would glare.

Now there was nothing left in this narrow little place to distract her. There wasn’t even a single garment in the room, except for a futon.

She picked up the clothes he’d left off and put them on. It was oversized and baggy, but it was certainly better than nothing.

Cautiously, she touched the door, and it creaked open, unlike its usual locked state.

By day, it was half guarded, but at night there was no one there.

After glancing back at the sleeping man, she stepped outside and felt the chill of the night air.

The bone-chilling cold of spring had already passed. That alone made me realize how long I had been in that room.

Yiseo slipped on and off his large pair of shoes.

Realizing they weren’t big enough to walk in anyway.

Not that she intended to go far anyway, since she had virtually nowhere else to go but this little ramble.

…I was just going to see Nanny and Youngsun for a while.

She had not seen them since he had started coming in and out of this place.

‘I wonder what’s happened to them, and why they won’t come over for a visit.’

I hesitated and was about to turn away.

A man appeared out of the dark night air, as if he had been waiting for me.

He was tall, somewhat thin, and wore a black cloth over his eyes. Beneath the hooded eyes, he was young, without a beard or wrinkle.

He set the shoes down in front of her and said, “Put these on and leave.”

He stepped back as she froze at the sudden appearance of this stranger, and added, ‘Put them on.’

“I did alter them, but they’re yours. You seemed to need it.”

Despite being covered, he seemed to be able to see.

Yiseo alternated between staring at the object at her feet and her adversary.

He was strangely clean.

A normal person’s body would have been tainted with a certain amount of thought.

Worry about his children, concern for his sick friends, resentment for the spies in the land…

Living in this world and not having a relationship with anyone is impossible.

But the other person was so clean that not even the slightest thought could be found, and that was…

“…The god you worship must be very jealous.”

His body had severed all ties to the world around him. So that only the god could be worshiped.

Yiseo frowned. It was dangerous to be even remotely close to someone like that.

Marrying him would cause one’s senses to be shattered, and speaking to him for even a moment would result in the other’s death.

Perhaps he had only brought her a pair of shoes, but even that might offend his god.

The other man seemed to notice and took a few steps back.

“That’s fine, put them on. If you keep walking on unsteady feet, you’ll be caught before you get to where you’re going.”

The words came from her side rather than his.

“You don’t serve the Great Lord, or why are you here this night…”

“I take orders from the Great Lord, but I do not serve him, so I have no reason to assume his will and put you back in that room.”

Then why are you here, if not to keep me from leaving by night, as Ban is by day?

“Wasn’t it the High Lord’s orders to you…, to keep me locked up in that room?”

“What need is there to lock you up, you have nowhere to go anyway.”

The bluntness of his words hurt.

He turned his head out into the yard at the invisible figure, a movement that, if it weren’t for the cloth covering his eyes, I would have thought he was staring beyond.

“I was guarding this place. Apparently, whether it’s a god or a ghost, a body that once received a god is good food for ghosts…”

Yiseo pursed her lips. She knew the fate of a shrine maiden who was abandoned by the god she worshiped.

“The Great Lord would never allow ghosts to covet you, would he?”

“Well, he might take pleasure in seeing my soul torn out.”

He was silent, only after a long pause did he speak.

“Even so… at least you’ll be doing it yourself, not borrowing the hands of ghosts.”

What does it matter, I thought, whether Leegwang tears her soul to pieces or the ghosts tear her soul apart?

In the end, it’s her suffering that counts.

“You can tell by the fact that I’m letting you remain here, can’t you?”

Yiseo sneered inwardly at the words.

‘Who was more dangerous to her right now, the ghosts or Leegwang?’

“I’d rather be eaten by ghosts.”

“Anything is better than dying, so go ahead and wear them. They’ll ward off most anything.”

Refusing to move out of the way without wearing the shoes, Yiseo finally slipped her feet into them and pushed past her opponent.

Instead of catching her, he spoke to her back on the way out.

“If you ever need help, come to the Temple of the Sacred River.”

There was a certainty in the words of the man who had long ago dedicated his name to the gods and went by only the official name of Secretary that Yiseo would come to him.

As if it were a matter of course.

Yet the strange assurance gave Yiso a pause, and she continued on her way.