To You, Who Will Die Alone in Paradise Chapter 65

He was a great being, and at the same time, he was himself, and a fascination that pulled him in with gravity. He was one and many. He was the future flowing into the present, built upon the accumulation of the past.

Come to me.

He was Yggdrasil.

Kellewen approached him. As he did, the edges of the being called Kellewen grew increasingly blurry. His mind had already left his body. The mind, freed from its vessel, lost its shape and was dyed by the colors of its surroundings. Everything about Kellewen was him. He was Kellewen.

Finally, just before he lost himself and became completely one with Yggdrasil.

You and I will save the world.

The last piece of Kellewen cried out.

‘Why must I save a world without him?’

A storm raged in the world filled only with light and peace.

Kellewen’s mind, which had been sinking endlessly, became clear again. Sadness pushed him up, and anger raised him to his feet. Using despair as a foothold, Kellewen stood within Yggdrasil completely as himself.

‘I curse you. I curse my fate, and I curse everyone who drove me to this point. I….’

Kellewen shed tears.

‘I curse myself.’

He begged Yggdrasil.

‘Please, save Dandeleon.’

There was no answer. But Kellewen could feel the sadness that surrounded him. It was a sadness slightly different from his own, immense yet fragile.

My child.

Yggdrasil could have crushed Kellewen in an instant. Then Kellewen would have lost himself and become a part of him. But he did not do so. Instead, he gently embraced him.

My poor child.

In that moment, the law changed.

Kellewen was no longer drawn to Yggdrasil. Instead, Yggdrasil moved toward Kellewen. Something that had been stacked layer by layer far below and hardened like a fossil twisted its body and groaned. The new law created a new flow. It was reborn in a direction it had never moved before.

Kellewen became the center of the world and swallowed an immensely vast amount of magical power.

When he opened his eyes, he saw a letter.

“……?”

Amid his confusion, Kellewen reflexively read the words on the letter. What was written on the white paper was clearly his own handwriting.

I’m sorry for the late hour. Could you come out to the dead prince’s fountain? I will be waiting. Kellewen.

A letter of just three sentences, hastily scribbled on a small piece of paper.

It was the last letter Kellewen had sent to Dandeleon.

“Kuhk…!”

The moment he realized what was in front of him, a violent pain suddenly shot through Kellewen’s entire body. Kellewen grit his teeth. The pain spread throughout his body like blood, in time with his heartbeat. His vision blurred. It wouldn’t have been strange if he had lost consciousness right then.

Kellewen’s eyes flew open and he snatched the letter from the desk. And with all his strength, he tore it to shreds.

Even if this was a dream, a momentary illusion, he didn’t want to leave any regrets.

How many times had he regretted this day, this moment?

Kellewen threw the pieces of the letter carelessly onto the floor and then glared at the window. A metallic glint sparkled on a distant tree branch. It was Tuella Deum, watching him.

Kellewen went to the window and yanked the curtains shut. That was his limit. Kellewen collapsed right there below the window.

“Hahk…!”

His heart was pounding as if it would burst. Kellewen could feel magical power flowing like blood inside his body. Normally, magical power is supposed to circulate within the body. But the current flow was different from that.

The magical power raced wildly within Kellewen, stirring up his entire body. It was as if living thorns were traveling through his blood vessels, stabbing at his nerves.

“Heuk, euk….”

Even as he sobbed in pain, Kellewen’s mind gradually began to understand the situation. Memories from just before he opened his eyes came back in fragments.

He had spoken with Yggdrasil.

He had cursed Yggdrasil, cursed the world, and cursed himself.

He had pleaded for Dandeleon to be saved.

Yggdrasil had taken pity on him. And so….

“Gack!”

A mouthful of blood finally spurted from his mouth. The fishy smell of blood that filled his nose was actually a welcome sensation. It was proof that this was not a dream or an illusion, but reality. The same was true for this pain. If he could endure this, at the end of this wave of pain, there would surely be….

Surely, he would find himself having returned to the past.

After enduring the pain, it was already dawn. Kellewen met with Dandeleon and confirmed that it was not all a dream or an illusion. As confirmation turned into certainty, his body trembled uncontrollably and tears flowed.

“I was wrong.”

Kellewen said, hugging Dandeleon tightly.

“I will not return to the Elven Forest.”

It was a sentiment he had mulled over thousands of times alone after Dandeleon had died. With one word, regret; with one word, joy; with one word, resolve; all fell as teardrops.

“Later, much later, I will go. After your time is over… it is enough to go then. For now, I want to prioritize you.”

It was truly a miracle. No matter how great a power magic was, he had never even heard that it was possible to go against time. It would certainly have been impossible with Kellewen’s power alone. This must be the grace of the great Yggdrasil. Kellewen thanked the guardian tree and made a solitary vow.

That he would dedicate his second life entirely to Dandeleon, and stay by his side until his breath ended. That he would protect him firmly so that no one could hurt him, and fill his life with only happiness until its very end.

“Your servant… where is Zellos?”

“Zellos? Why all of a sudden?”

To do that, preparations were necessary.

“…I’ve remembered something I have to do.”

Kellewen left Dandeleon’s room and met with the Crown Prince of Benoit. He negotiated with the Crown Prince about his own situation, and in the process, he dropped a small hint about the Lighthouse of Zellochal. The Crown Prince, intoxicated by the illusion of a second lighthouse, gave Kellewen the Celeste Domain.

On his way out, Kellewen met with Herma and declared that he would not be returning to the Elven Forest. After that, he visited several foreign dignitaries staying in various parts of the Benoit royal palace and had similar conversations as he had with the Crown Prince. This was with the intention of preparing other refuges, just in case he was unable to stay in Benoit.

Time passed quickly while handling all these matters. By the time Kellewen arrived at the Celeste Domain, the sun was already setting in the western sky.

“Leon.”

Kellewen’s voice, as he took his first step into his new home, was filled with happiness and hope. He held a bouquet of flowers he had prepared for Dandeleon and called his name at the top of his voice. He smiled naturally at the thought of Dandeleon smiling when he saw the bouquet.

“…Leon?”

But no matter how many times he called, Dandeleon did not appear.

The bouquet dropped from Kellewen’s hand. The yellow flowers, which resembled Dandeleon, were trampled and crushed under Kellewen’s feet as he rushed forward.

Dandeleon was found the next day in the afternoon, at an inn near the capital’s east gate.

Because the weather was warm, by the time Kellewen arrived, decomposition was already somewhat underway. When the door was opened, Dandeleon’s body was seen submerged in a giant pool of blood. The sound of flies buzzing was deafening. There was a nauseating smell of death.

Kellewen stood before Dandeleon’s body and stared at him blankly. At the face that had died with its eyes open, at the flies that persistently clung to those eyes before flying off and repeating the cycle, at the blood-soaked clothes and the skin that had turned bluish.

Even after a long time, Kellewen did not move. Soldiers asked if they could retrieve the body, but Kellewen ignored them as if he couldn’t hear. While everyone was at a loss, Herma, who had heard the news late, appeared. He dragged Kellewen away by force. Kellewen, dazed, was dragged along.

The second despair was less shocking than the first, but more cruel.

A miracle had happened and he’d gotten a chance, but he had thrown it away so trivially. Kellewen’s guilt was beyond words. When he experienced the first death, he had grieved, but the second time, he had no room to grieve. He was furious. At no one else but himself.

What was the point of all the preparations for Dandeleon? He hadn’t been by his side when he was needed most. He had lost him and ultimately let him die. He had lost him twice.

The first thing Kellewen did after waking up in Ardenberg was to attempt suicide. He stabbed himself in the neck with a paper knife that was on the desk.

His life was saved because Tuella Deum was monitoring him in shifts. However, because he had carelessly jammed something that wasn’t even a weapon into his neck, his throat was damaged, and he could no longer speak. Herma seemed to have judged that it would be dangerous to leave Kellewen alone any longer, and the very next day, he left Benoit and headed for the Elven Forest.

My child.

Kellewen stood before Yggdrasil again.

“Please give me one more chance.”

His body was damaged, but it was not difficult to produce a voice here. Yggdrasil embraced him warmly without answering. Within the immense magical power, Kellewen’s ego felt as if it would melt away at any moment.

“Please, just one more time….”

Yggdrasil did not answer.

“Are you saying this is really the end? That Dandeleon will just die and disappear, and I am to save the world that he has disappeared from?”

Yggdrasil did not answer.

“Was I….”

Yggdrasil.

“Born for that?”

Yggdrasil grieved.

When he opened his eyes, his vision was full of flowers. A red stain dropped onto a yellow petal. Kellewen grimaced.

“High Elf, the blood…!”

Someone saw him and screamed. Kellewen felt his face with his hand. Blood was flowing from his nose. As soon as he realized that fact, the pain came.