The Espers Who Regretted Losing Me Chapter 83

Let me say this again—I don’t want to be friends with them.

I want them to fully understand how hard my life was. I want them to feel it from my position. Then I’ll turn them into loyal little doormats who wipe my feet.

Flustered by my own thoughts, I flipped my phone over and buried my face in the pillow.

 

 

****

 

 

 

Days off are boring.

I finally realized how difficult it is to spend time alone in your room with nothing to do.

My past self was honestly amazing.

They look fine, though.

On the first day off, Lee Shinra and Yeon Dogyeong went out together.

On the second day, Cha Eunhwi joined them.

Both times, I had a serious internal battle over whether to say, I want to go too.

Of course, I held back.

If we even spend our days off together, it’ll feel like we’re actually close. I hate that.

Today started like usual.

After breakfast, I checked the quota sheet Cha Eunhwi handed me and made a plan.

“Our performance last week was really good, so this week’s quota increased.”

“Hyung. Are we going into a gate again this afternoon?”

“That was the plan… Hyeya.”

“Yeah?”

“The Graphite Squad returned early this morning. And… it seems their guide might know something about your new guiding method. The Director asked you to come to his office at 10:20.”

“…You mean the expedition team, right? The Director mentioned them before.”

When I first heard about the S-rank guide of the Graphite Squad, I made sure to ask questions.

Since I’m supposed to remember nothing, I need information in advance. Otherwise, I might slip up somewhere.

Cha Eunhwi nodded.

“Right. Did the Director explain anything about the Graphite Squad?”

“He said it was formed three years ago. And one of their espers was originally supposed to join Geumgang Second Squad with you, Dogyeong, and Shinra.”

“Ah, that old man really talks too much…”

Dogyeong muttered under his breath.

I heard him perfectly.

Without a word, I turned my head and slowly drew a finger across my lips while looking at him.

Dogyeong copied the gesture and shut his mouth.

After sighing once, I looked back at Cha Eunhwi.

“I don’t really care since I don’t know them anyway. So are we not going into a gate today?”

“…If timing works out, we can do one or two. Do you want to?”

What kind of question is that?

I had been lying around all weekend. My whole body felt stiff.

When I gave a vague yes, Eunhwi smiled lightly and pointed out a few C-rank gates.

“These and these. No special strategy needed. Just eliminate all visible monsters. We can head in this evening depending on the situation.”

“Yoon Hyeya, you used to hate entering gates. These days you act like you’ve hidden a jar of honey inside.”

Dogyeong appeared beside me without a sound, scanning the gate names.

There was no need to hide my reason.

“It’s because I can’t hit you.”

“Why not? I told you, if it’s anyone else I won’t, but I’d let you hit me.”

“I’m saving that. I’ll use it when I need it, so remember that. Anyway, if I just sit still, my chest feels tight and my insides feel blocked. But when I go into a gate and beat up monsters, I feel better. Strange, right? I never felt that way when I lived alone inside one.”

Dogyeong avoided my gaze with shameless ease.

Cha Eunhwi gave an awkward smile.

Shinra lowered his head, sweating.

“You guys can’t even meet my eyes. That alone makes me feel better.”

“…Do you want me to explain more about the Graphite Squad?”

“I’m not that curious, but if you’ve got nothing else to say, go ahead.”

There was still an hour left before my meeting with the Director.

Cha Eunhwi brought out cake and ade from the fridge and gave a more detailed explanation about the Graphite Squad.

Most of it I already knew.

Still, it was nice not having to pretend ignorance anymore.

When the time came, we headed to the Director’s office.

Technically, I could have gone alone.

But all three followed me.

Inside, two unfamiliar men were already there.

They looked mid-to-late twenties at most. Both had neat impressions.

Director Jeong Sigyeom introduced them first.

“Everyone’s here. This is Guide Lee Muhwan of the Graphite Squad. And next to him is Esper Seo Jaeyeon. He was originally supposed to join Geumgang Second Squad.”

“Nice to meet you. I’m Lee Muhwan.”

“Seo Jaeyeon.”

Ah. So that’s him.

I’m finally seeing his face.

They said his personality was good. He did look like someone who smiled often.

Did the Director tell them about my memory loss?

I greeted them.

“Hello, I’m Yoon Hye—”

I couldn’t finish.

Right next to me, Dogyeong and Shinra were openly on guard.

Anyone in the room could tell.

“…Ha.”

As expected, the Director pressed his forehead.

Eunhwi sighed.

Even Lee Muhwan and Seo Jaeyeon looked awkward.

What made it worse—

Dogyeong and Shinra were practically glued to my sides.

“Ah, come on.”

If you’re going to act embarrassing, at least pretend you don’t know me and stand far away.

When I clicked my tongue in annoyance, they immediately drooped and stepped back.

I clicked my tongue again and looked forward.

Lee Muhwan and Seo Jaeyeon were smiling.

Seo Jaeyeon even let out a small laugh before apologizing.

“It just seems like you’re closer than we heard.”

“Ah… Did the Director not tell you anything?”

“About what?”

“That I developed amnesia while trapped in a gate.”

“…Excuse me?”

Maybe they truly hadn’t heard.

Or maybe it hadn’t been mentioned on purpose.

I looked at Director Jeong Sigyeom.

“The Graphite Squad was on external operations. Communication was difficult. I planned to explain after they returned.”

That made sense.

No need to worry.

I briefly explained how I was trapped inside a gate, what happened afterward—

and the changes I experienced once I came out.

If I said anything I shouldn’t, the Director would stop me. He didn’t.

That meant these two didn’t need to be kept in the dark.

After listening seriously, Lee Muhwan spoke first.

“Guide Yoon Hyeya’s ability became stronger.”

It wasn’t speculation.

It was certainty.

I tilted my head.

“Stronger… what does that mean? Could you explain a little more?”

“Yes. Even among espers, abilities differ. Some control elements. Some create barriers. Some heal. Some teleport.”

“Yes.”

“It’s the same for guides. Once you surpass a certain level, a new ability manifests. In your case, it’s additional guiding triggered through physical attacks.”

“Oh. I understand. But how do you know that?”

“I used to follow my squad’s espers around and steal the last hit from monsters. So I unlocked it early.”

Just hearing that, I could tell he must have had a very good relationship with his squad.

Normally, espers would tell a guide to stay out of the way.

It seemed he hadn’t reported it to headquarters, though.

The moment he finished saying he had “unlocked it early,”

the Director’s face grew tired.

“…Guide Lee Muhwan. Why didn’t you report that?”

Exactly what I expected.

Lee Muhwan smiled like an angel.

“Well, even if I told you, it wouldn’t mean anything. Do you think espers would kindly give the last hit to a guide? If they eliminate monsters themselves, they grow stronger.”