Second Half Chapter 21

It would be accurate to say that his feelings were only to that extent. He didn’t particularly regret breaking up or not, and these actions were possible because protecting his pride was more important than resolving his immediate curiosity.

However, Jerim was currently genuinely curious about the mind of his ex-boyfriend, who was doing nothing but unpredictable things. His curiosity, which could have ended at the line of maintaining his pride by saying he didn’t really want to know, had long since crossed that line. So, he finally let the question out of his mouth.

“I’m asking what the hell you’re trying to do with me right now.”

At that, Aaron poked his own smooth, unscarred nape and sneered.

“I told you, I’m saying hello?”

“Are you kidding me? Can’t you understand a word I’m saying? I’m asking why you transferred, and what the reason is for acting like such a piece of shit to me.”

“You only realized it was a joke now? You’re the one who seems a bit lacking in situational awareness. It’s devastating that the level of the midfielder for the team I have to play for is only at this standard.”

“…”

Because his anger had risen to the top of his head, the words wouldn’t come out properly. This was the first time he’d experienced this since the day he confirmed Aaron’s cheating through a press photo. That means it’s been a full 10 years. Originally, Jerim was the type to tease others rather than be teased; he wasn’t the type to lose his reason because his emotions became intense due to someone else.

Why would he spend his most stamina-consuming energy, anger, on someone else when it’s bothersome and a waste of time? If the opponent made him pissed off, he just had to make them twice as pissed off. Compared to being angry alone, this way was much more rewarding and productive.

However, then and now, this theory didn’t work well on Aaron alone. In the past, because he liked him quite deeply for a first love, he couldn’t even think of revenge, and now… he simply lost to his brazenness and psycho-like aspects.

‘I’m no match for him.’

He wasn’t the type to lose to others in this regard, but he had to admit it. He lost. If he was at the level of a weekly magazine that hangs the most provocative headlines after at least doing a fact-check, Aaron was at the level of a yellow journal that didn’t care about photoshopping or spreading rumors.

It was when Juhan Jerim was chewing on both anger and helplessness as he faced his limits. Aaron acted like a person determined to pour oil on a burning house while fanning Jerim’s face.

“Woah, woah, don’t get mad when the weather is so hot. I heard it often from you, but summer in Korea is really humid. Ah, is that why you have such a temper?”

“I feel like I’m going crazy right now not because of the heat, but because of the bastard in front of my eyes…?”

“It’s an honor. I feel the exact same way as you. You have a talent for making people lose their temper. …To the point that I want to shove you in there right now if I could.”

Jerim let out a hollow laugh when he saw the sharp corners of the eyes glancing toward the closet. Even so, he had locked that guy in the bathroom considering his bulk, but that guy says he wants to lock a person in a closet. At this point, Jerim was also going for broke. He disheveled his bangs into a mess and blurted out whatever came to his mouth.

“Hey, did you perhaps come here because you want to try something with me again? Is that why you’re trolling?”

“What if I did?”

“What do you mean ‘what if.’ The person who’s supposed to give the rice cake isn’t even thinking about it. Go suck a dick.”

He held up a hand with his thumb tucked between his index and middle finger inside a clenched fist. It was a hand gesture that passed as an insult in both Korea and Spain. However, Aaron replied nonchalantly as if he hadn’t seen the “fist potato” at all.

“I think I pulled it out for you quite often. Ah, do you want to see it after a long time? But what to do. Regrettably, I don’t really want to pull out my dick and show it to you right now.”

“You crazy pervert bastard…”

Jerim once again poignantly realized the fact that he was no match. Instead of hearing the answer to his question, it was likely to end after hearing only low-quality jokes. Aaron slowly stroked Jerim’s cheeks, which had turned pale as if they were never flushed, with the back of his hand.

“Relax. I said I don’t have that intention? Rather, you’re staring at me so passionately that I’m a little scared I might get pounced on.”

“Yeah, right. Actually, I’m holding back because I want to pounce on you and snap your dick right off.”

“What a bloodthirsty joke.”

“Why… do you think it’s a joke?”

“You liked my dick.”

At the unfair and beyond-ridiculous accusation that drove a person to be a pervert, Jerim’s patience snapped with a snap. He grabbed Aaron’s wrist as if he were going to break it and shouted loudly.

“When did I! You were the one who was so fucking obsessed, saying every day how could you be so pretty even here…!”

Jerim, who suddenly regained his senses mid-sentence, covered his mouth with both hands. Since it was closer to a hit than a cover, a sharp, smacking sound rang out cheerfully. Slap!

“…”

“…”

The two, flustered, stayed silent while stopping their movements as if a middle section of a film had been artificially cut out. Jerim’s face turned bright red again, and Aaron also avoided his gaze as if he were troubled. But that was only for a moment; Aaron, who regained his pace first, asked with a smirk.

“…Are you still keeping it pretty?”

“Fuck!”

Jerim kicked the object caught at his foot with all his might. Aaron, who was holding his stomach and laughing, didn’t even let out a groan even though his leg was hit directly by the flying bag. The sound of laughter, as if he were about to lose his breath, filled the room that had been silent until just now.

Listening to that cheerful laughter, Jerim earnestly hoped that that guy would choke and die right now, regardless of the Big Ear or whatever. Isn’t now the time when the amulet his mother gave him should show its effect? A guy who is the literal embodiment of an ill-fated relationship from the past is scratching at his insides like this right in front of his eyes.

Please, let a hex fly and strike him. Jerim was desperate enough to seek out superstitions he didn’t believe in. But of course, there was no way such an absurd wish would come true. Aaron, who stopped laughing, breathed normally and wiped the tears that had formed at the corners of his eyes.

“Ha, I’m going crazy. Jerim, why are you consistently so fun? This is why I transferred to Sefton.”

“What?”

From the mouth of Aaron, who had insisted ‘there’s no special reason for the transfer’ until the end even while being tasered, came words that didn’t make sense. Doesn’t the wording ‘this is why’ ultimately mean there was a reason for the transfer? Even more, it’s probably not just a feeling that the reason sounds like ‘because I thought the reaction of my ex-boyfriend would be fun.’

Jerim, who secretly pledged that if he transferred for such a reason, he should kill him personally instead of waiting for him to die in an accident, asked back fiercely. But Aaron wasn’t discouraged at all. Rather, he countered with an arrogant attitude as if he were doing him a favor.

“The reason I transferred. Weren’t you the one curious about it?”

“Weren’t you the one who didn’t want to tell me?”

“I told you, it’s not a topic to ask while gaming. If you had asked seriously like you are now, of course I would have told you. It’s not like I’m some kind of personality-disordered sociopath.”

“It seems your self-objectification is lacking, but you are a sociopath…”

“Another joke.”

He swore he hadn’t made a single joke since earlier, but Jerim, instead of bothering to deny it, just held the back of his neck. Since he knew it wouldn’t work even if he spoke, his intention was to at least loosen his stiff muscles. For some reason, after Aaron transferred, he often got cramps in his shoulders and his neck felt stiff.

“More than that, I want to have a conversation as a captain to a teammate.”

It was when he frowned because his finger touched the wound where bite marks remained while massaging his stiff neck. Because he requested a conversation in a tone stripped of playfulness, he nodded unintentionally. To be precise, he responded helplessly because of the title that stimulated his sense of responsibility.

“Speak.”

Even after permission was granted, Aaron hesitated for a long time before opening his mouth. The way of speaking itself was different from before, when he was cracking jokes the whole time.

“…Do you still find soccer fun? Like when you were a kid. Does your heart race just by looking at a ball, and when you see a grass field, do you start by gauging if it would be good to kick a ball here, and even after running for the full 90 minutes, are you excited at the thought of stepping on the ground again tomorrow?”

“…”

Weren’t you going to tell me why you transferred? Jerim hesitated unlike himself at the out-of-the-blue question that flew in. No matter how much he tried to move the root of his tongue, the answer didn’t come out as if a round ball were filling his mouth.

Because, whether as a kid or now, he had never once thought that soccer was fun.