Your Majesty, Dinner Is Ready. Chapter 116 - I Was Lying Down for Ten Whole Years? Good Grief!

Chapter 116 — I Was Lying Down for Ten Whole Years? Good Grief!

 

I stood in front of a building with a familiar appearance.

[Sun Orphanage]

The moment my eyes fell upon the sign beside the front gate, I realized what was happening.

It was a dream. More precisely, a grotesque dream that belonged in the realm of nightmares.

‘I’m here again.’

It was such a frequent visitor that the moment I recognized the situation, it turned into a lucid dream.

It was always like this.

Though my mind was clear, I wasn’t granted the authority to freely reshape the dream world as I pleased. Rather, my body moved on its own while my free will was taken away.

“……”

Soon enough, my ungrateful eyes forcibly showed their owner a scene he did not wish to see.

At the entrance of the orphanage.

A little girl approached me, her body covered in bluish bruises, blood dripping steadily from her wounds.

“It hurts…”

“……”

I stared into Yoonji’s eyes for a moment before placing a hand on her bloodstained hair.

“Today’s resentment is a little weaker than usual. If possible, could you tear me apart or trample me like you used to?”

Naturally, no answer came. But that was fine. Some emotions don’t crumble simply because they travel only one way.

“I hope that next time, we can at least exchange a few words.”

As I wiped the blood from Yoonji’s face, I drew a taut strand of spider silk from my index finger.

Thud.

A sharp pain pierced my neck.

My hazy consciousness immediately sharpened, and my vision changed.

“……”

The next moment… I was lying on a hospital bed.

It was the only bed inside a spacious, comfortable hospital room filled with a pleasant fragrance.

[You’re finally awake! :D]

As if it had been waiting, words appeared before my eyes.

 

[Landmark – Wings of the Sky]

[The most prestigious healing center in District Three. Ordinary people can’t even enter, but explorers belonging to the Ash Wolf Guild may use it if they spend a large amount of merit accumulated from conquering labyrinths.]

 

“How long was I unconscious?”

Throwing aside the blanket embroidered with a blue sky, I stood up… only to stagger.

Truth hurriedly displayed enormous letters.

[You were unconscious for about one day. The side effects of the hand mirror artifact haven’t completely disappeared yet, so don’t overexert yourself for the time being!]

“Thanks for the quick explanation.”

Only one day had passed.

Yet the crushing heaviness and pounding ache in my head had already eased considerably.

As expected of Wings of the Sky. It probably wouldn’t heal me completely, though. I’d likely have to visit an even greater healer later.

I left the bed and slowly walked toward the window.

Crackle… crackle-crackle!

As I gazed at the sunset sky where the sun was gradually descending, lightning burst wildly from my collarbone.

It was unusually violent. So violent that interpreting the divine intent took slightly longer than usual.

“So you’re saying you were so bored while I was unconscious that you nearly went mad.”

Since there were no other believers worth watching besides me, even a single day must have felt unbearably dull.

To have bored the Exalted One… As an unworthy cultist of the heavens, I could only offer a proper apology.

“I was simply too weak and ended up losing consciousness. Please forgive me after seeing this.”

Rustle.

I undid the top two buttons of my clean patient gown and slightly opened the collar. A refined service that avoided excessive exposure. The key point was lowering my head just enough to appear bashful.

BZZZT!

Lightning carrying an indescribable divine will erupted wildly from the tattoo near my collarbone before disappearing. It seemed the gesture had pleased him.

Squirm…

Then the Silent One also greeted me.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t understand what He was saying.

Perhaps because I, the only cultist among His mere three followers, had been unconscious, His divine power had become much weaker than before.

I couldn’t decipher a thing.

“That’s right. I also believe grilled chicken skewers are the king of street food.”

After giving what was probably the closest answer, I continued gazing outside.

Even after quite some time had passed, Okail the Harbinger of Cataclysmic Upheaval sent no further intent.

“It seems Lord Okail wasn’t worried about my unconsciousness at all.”

I nodded in satisfaction. That’s exactly how an Evil God should be. Whether His own cultist lived or died, He should remain devoted solely to His own desires. And a true cultist ought to accept an Evil God’s indifference and neglect with joy.

“Please continue maintaining such a dignified attitude befitting an Evil God.”

As I absentmindedly rubbed the chain tattoo on my thigh, the hospital room door opened.

The tiger beastfolk siblings entered.

“Huh?”

“Karr!”

Marlin immediately ran over and grabbed my hand.

“You’re finally awake! You were lying unconscious for ten whole years!”

“I see.”

I nodded calmly. Truthy had clearly said it had only been one day. But I trusted my ward.

“……”

“……”

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“…Why aren’t you surprised?”

“My goodness.”

My shoulders trembled as I covered my mouth.

“I’ve been lying unconscious for ten years. I can hardly believe it.”

“…Ugh, seriously! You’re so annoying!”

Marlin repeatedly poked my side with the fingernail of her index finger.

Holding onto her finger as though shaking hands, I asked,

“Did anything happen while I was unconscious?”

“There was a small commotion after you collapsed immediately upon exiting the labyrinth, Patron.”

Abel chuckled.

“People came up with all kinds of theories about your collapse. At present, the most accepted explanation is that you normally collapse all the time anyway; it was just that becoming a vampire inside Battlefield of the Sun and Moon made you look healthier than usual.”

I’d wanted to be known for having an intellectual image. Instead, I’d unintentionally gained the frail-and-sickly attribute.

Though it wasn’t exactly an unfounded rumor, considering Evil God worshippers with elven bloodlines grew physically weak because of Rot Sprout.

Zap!

The Exalted One protested that frailty belonged to “Longboy,” so I shouldn’t steal it.

“Longboy” referred to Odilon.

To be fair, he really was the sort of young master whose knees gave out simply from walking.

“By the way, Patron.”

Still smiling faintly, Abel lowered his voice.

“You fought in a rather painful manner during this guild war as well.”

“Abel’s right. Didn’t we make a promise before? Hmm… what exactly was it again?”

“……”

The siblings simultaneously began giving me icy stares.

Terrifying. Even more frightening than receiving a call from Department Head Choi, the evil spirit, at three in the morning.

“…I’m sorry.”

Words alone wouldn’t solve this. So I made a practical promise.

“From now on, if I gradually end up looking more and more battered while fighting, I’ll cover myself with illusion-type Mysteries so I’ll still appear unharmed.”

“…What kind of promise is that?!”

“You really do never fail to exceed our expectations…”

The siblings’ gazes softened slightly.

Since Battlefield of the Sun and Moon was a labyrinth where safety was guaranteed, they probably hadn’t been truly furious to begin with.

If they had, they would’ve shown much heavier emotions from the very start, just like last time.

“Was there anything else important I should know?”

“The half-elf who barged into the guild war has been imprisoned in District Three’s prison.”

Apparently, Targon had personally thrown the Conspirator into prison.

Even then, he’d refused to give up and kept resisting… until the gray orc, restored to being a Level 9 Berserker, punched him square in the face.

Unable to hide my regret, I sighed.

“What a terribly boring place to end up. District Four’s prison is much better.”

“What do you mean?”

Marlin’s ears perked up.

“Isn’t every prison basically the same?”

“No. Every district in Pletica has its own prison, each with its own unique characteristics.”

District Three’s prison, for example, was underground.

Its countless mystical surveillance systems meant that once imprisoned, you’d never see sunlight again until your sentence ended.

“Once you’re sent into the underground prison, you’re trapped in darkness forever. That’s why I say it’s excessively harsh.”

“If you imagine not seeing sunlight for decades… yeah, that does sound awful.”

“Hm? That’s nothing special. Just think of yourself as becoming a vampire with an extreme case of sunlight avoidance syndrome.”

“…Your imagination really is something.”

Shaking her head, Marlin poked my back.

“So what’s the real reason you think the underground prison is terrible?”

“If it’s filled with traps, escaping safely afterward becomes all the more satisfying. But it’s merely dark, without any other dangers. By using boredom itself as its defense, it crushes one’s motivation to escape. Isn’t that truly an inhumane scheme?”

“……”

I was about to explain how terrifying the underground prison’s design of having absolutely nothing really was… but Abel spoke first.

“…Anyway, that ninja was interrogated by the Ash Wolf Guild. Surprisingly, he cooperated and confessed to everything rather quickly.”

The murders of Rigobert from the Ash Wolf Guild and Laenis from the FireTurtle Guild.

As well as leaking information regarding the Mysteries possessed by Ash Wolf Guild explorers.

Considering the Conspirator possessed [Skin of Another], a Mystery specialized in infiltration and covert operations, the damage had actually remained fairly limited.

Because he’s a follower of Onishiv… The Ascetic of Equal Balance.

The Evil God of painful harmony and obsessive order.

Like Artein, Onishiv pursued harmony.

As such, His followers didn’t simply go around killing people indiscriminately. Had he been a deity that advocated mass slaughter, Onishiv would’ve shared the same fate as the thirty-seven Evil Gods who were destroyed during the Great Holy War.

“And now, he’s simply sitting there blankly without any motivation.”

“Really?”

“Yes. Apparently, he spends the entire day sitting in the exact same position, doing absolutely nothing.”

I’d ordered him through Mind Usurper to abandon his faith. Naturally, he’d lost the will to do anything. Onishiv had been the very reason he continued living.

Seeing one of my own people drowning in despair pained my heart.

Still, life was full of unfortunate events. That much, I could endure.

…Even so, I won’t deny that he was inevitably driven into Onishiv’s faith.

I wasn’t exactly fond of the atmosphere within certain elven societies that looked down upon half-elves.

There were still elves who held outdated beliefs such as,

“If you fall in love with a human and a half-elf child is born, can’t you just kill it or sell it?”

I disliked that way of thinking as well. The world’s perception of half-elves remained anything but harmonious.

“But who exactly was that half-elf?”

Marlin suddenly asked with narrowed brows.

“Even Sir Ruphrite couldn’t hide his anger…”

“He was simply a half-elf who, after falling into the worst possible environment, failed to grow into an upright person like me and ultimately became twisted.”

“An upright person? Who?”

She pretended to look around. So I grabbed her head with both hands and made her face me.

“Where are you looking? District Six’s most upstanding cultist is standing right here.”

“…Compared to other cultists, I guess you do live a fairly upright life.”

Marlin responded halfheartedly, yet still acknowledged what I’d said.

Abel nodded beside her.

“What’s wrong with the other cultists? Whenever I greet them with a warm smile and wave, they become embarrassed and immediately turn around. They’re all such introverts.”

I’d always wanted to become friendly with my neighbors in the cultist district. But everyone was so shy they wouldn’t even return my greetings.

“That’s because you’re too–”

“By the way, where’s everyone else?”

While gently pulling on her cheeks, I asked.

Marlin forcibly pried my hand away before answering.

“At the Ash Wolf Guild headquarters. They’re holding a banquet to celebrate winning the guild war. Our expedition was invited too.”

“Then why did the two of you come here?”

“Because we couldn’t enjoy ourselves without you, Karr.”

Marlin answered as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Abel’s expression silently agreed with his sister.

A decision that couldn’t help but delight me as their patron.

“How admirable.”

I patted both of their heads simultaneously.

Smiling brightly, Marlin’s ears twitched.

“The housekeeper’s big sis came with us too because she said she couldn’t enjoy herself while you were unconscious. But once we got near here, she suddenly said she had something important to do and left.”

“Hm.”

On the surface, she’d declined the banquet for the same reason as the siblings.

But her real intentions were clearly different.

 

[She came along hoping to earn some points, then deliberately stepped aside so you and the siblings could have some quality time together. Incidentally, she had already asked the healer exactly when you were expected to wake up.]

[She even took into account the fact that you’d see right through her intentions! Truly impressive!]

 

A truly astonishing level of social maneuvering.

To survive as a thief in the slums, this much was apparently standard.

“Kids, now that I’m awake, shall we go enjoy the banquet together?”

As I patted their heads again, both of their tails began swishing enthusiastically.

“Yes! Honestly, it was a bit disappointing without you. This is perfect.”

To be honest, the food probably wouldn’t compare to Charlotte’s cooking. Still, having so many people gathered together would make for a lively celebration.

Besides, I’d finally have people with whom I could practice my faith on behalf of the Exalted One after missing out while unconscious.

“Then let’s go.”

After accomplishing something great, one should always enjoy the party afterward.

A truth that every professional in the exploration industry, with the sole exception of Odilon… would undoubtedly agree with.