Flower Dream Chapter 122

“That’s…”

Dan Yuha, who had parted his lips as if to speak in response to Shin Ryuwon’s question, closed his mouth again. Until now, he had agonized over how he would act upon reuniting with Ryuwon and how he would explain what had happened that day, organizing his thoughts as best he could.

But now that the opportunity to reveal the truth had actually arrived, he felt as if his throat was blocked. Overwhelmed by a surge of emotion, Yuha closed his eyes, took a deep breath in, and let it out.

It’s alright. His Highness said he trusts me.

Dan Yuha repeated to himself inwardly, taking deep breaths over and over. After swallowing the tears that had risen to his throat, he slowly lifted his eyelids. Then, he opened his mouth carefully.

“On the night of the incident, I was on my way to replace the sleeping incense in His Highness’s bedchamber. And then I heard an unfamiliar scream. Startled, I ran over, and what I saw was…”

∞ ∞ ∞

The story was very long. Shin Ryuwon’s eyes hardened upon hearing Dan Yuha’s account that he had fallen into a semi-rampant state due to Hong Juyak’s actions, having infiltrated the bedchamber through the emergency passage.

Confirming through Yuha that the owner of the unpleasant scent he had detected was Juyak made his stomach churn.

In truth, he had long harbored suspicions. That was also why, when Hong Haehwa had come to him to frame Dan Yuha, he had asked her to release Hong Juyak’s scent.

But at that time, even after smelling her body fragrance, nothing had come to mind. It had merely triggered the same intense aversion as always.

Because of that, while he suspected them, he had no choice but to withdraw for the time being. Without concrete evidence to bind them, even Ryuwon could not arrest a tribal chieftain’s faction based solely on circumstantial evidence.

All he could do was detain Hong Haehwa and her daughter and the elders of the Honghwa Clan to prevent them from scheming further, and request an imperial investigator to interrogate them about anything they might be hiding.

‘Are you alright, Your Highness?’

Dan Yuha stopped speaking and watched Shin Ryuwon as his expression soured.

‘…Yes, continue.’

Ryuwon composed his discomposed features and urged the continuation of the story. The one going through the most difficulty right now was not himself, but Yuha, who had to recall painful memories and voice them aloud.

After hesitating for a moment, Dan Yuha briefly explained the circumstances that had led him to share a bed with Shin Ryuwon. He casually added that it had not been forced.

That night, spending the night with the Crown Prince had been entirely his own will. An accident born of the desire, even just once, to be loved by the one he longed for.

Emphasizing that he had also consented, Yuha briefly glanced at Ryuwon’s reaction. He worried that Ryuwon might ask why he hadn’t refused.

Fortunately, Shin Ryuwon did not press him on that point. Perhaps due to the shock of his own actions, he didn’t even think to question why Dan Yuha had accepted him without rejection. He merely hung his head like a sinner, his expression one of shame.

Then, when Yuha mentioned that he had been attacked by Juyak and lost consciousness while going to inform his retainers of the incident, Ryuwon let out a deep, earth-shattering sigh.

The fact that he had been asleep, unaware of everything, while Yuha was being abducted and threatened with his life, was unbearably humiliating.

Shin Ryuwon suppressed the anger and self-loathing that boiled within him, listening intently to Dan Yuha’s story.

“…And that’s why I couldn’t return to the stronghold.”

Finally, Dan Yuha revealed that while he was unconscious, Ju Cheongwoo and his companions had rescued him and fled. By the time he came to his senses, a week had already passed, and a wanted notice had been issued, leaving him flustered.

With no way to ascertain the situation back home, after discussing with the three others, they decided to lie low for the time being, and later scattered to flee separately for safety…

At the moment when the full truth was finally revealed, Shin Ryuwon closed his eyes with a pained expression. Overwhelmed by waves of regret and guilt, he could not bear to look Dan Yuha straight in the eye.

The posters his companions had seen must certainly have been the wanted notices posted by some local officials who had misinterpreted his request for cooperation. But Ryuwon felt no inclination to blame them.

If Yuha’s trust in him had been firm, even if the posters’ contents were malicious, he would have come forward and returned on his own long ago.

Yet Dan Yuha had not come. That meant he had failed to inspire that trust. Shin Ryuwon found this utterly miserable.

But he could not remain like this. There was something he needed to say to Yuha right now.

“I’m sorry.”

“…Excuse me?”

“Because of my inadequacy, you went through such great hardship.”

Shin Ryuwon apologized to Dan Yuha in a somber voice. If he hadn’t lost his mind back then, if he hadn’t overused the medicine following the royal physician’s advice, if he hadn’t succumbed to his desires… The more he thought about it, the more he regretted everything he had done.

Instead of foolishly falling asleep, he should have somehow held onto his consciousness. Ryuwon reproached himself and rubbed his face with his hands.

It would be a lie to say he hadn’t felt even the slightest bit of resentment while longing for Yuha for nearly a month and a half.

Since it was certain that Dan Yuha had left him, whether by choice or not, Shin Ryuwon, even while believing in his innocence, would sometimes feel uneasy. As a human being, in such moments, an unavoidable sense of disappointment would arise. The pain of experiencing loss for the first time in his life was that great.

But upon learning the truth, he was so ashamed that he could not lift his head. He found himself utterly detestable for having felt aggrieved toward Dan Yuha, who had endured a life of wandering alone, unable to rely on anyone.

Unless he had gone mad, how could he have harbored such feelings toward the one who must have been far more desperate and lost than himself?

“I don’t know how to ask for your forgiveness. I am truly sorry.”

Shin Ryuwon, uncharacteristically restless, apologized once more. Even on the battlefield, he had never been this frightened, yet now he was clearly losing his composure.

Looking back, it had always been this way. When with Yuha, Ryuwon often acted more emotionally than he did with others. At the time, he hadn’t understood why, but now he knew the reason for certain.

“A-ah, no! Please don’t do this! As I said before… what happened that day was something I also agreed to. And everything that followed was all because of Hong Juyak.”

Dan Yuha tried to stop Shin Ryuwon from repeatedly apologizing. The one at fault was someone else; Ryuwon had no reason to feel sorry.

Above all, Yuha hoped that Ryuwon did not regret holding him. If that apology carried such a meaning, it would be terribly sad.

“Anyway, I’m fine. We’ve met like this, and the misunderstanding has been cleared up… Thanks to Your Highness believing in me…”

“There’s no need for that.”

“Excuse me?”

“You don’t have to force yourself to say you’re fine.”

Shin Ryuwon carefully raised his hand and cupped Dan Yuha’s cheek. The shorter hair, the gaunt cheeks, the rougher skin compared to before, the wounds on his body from being scratched by branches and hitting rocks…

Though still beautiful, the sight of Yuha, with all his hardships plainly etched upon him, twisted Ryuwon’s neatly furrowed brow. The noticeably thinner face and the countless small scratches covering his skin testified to the innumerable difficulties he had endured.

“Rather, I wish you would get angry at me. Shout at me, curse me, asking why I couldn’t protect you, why I’m only finding you now, what I was doing while you were in danger.”

“How could I ever…”

“You can. If you want, you can even strike me until you feel better.”

“Please don’t say such things, I truly… ngh.”

Dan Yuha, who had been about to say he was fine, bit his lips as something hot surged up from within his chest. His throat burned, and the tip of his nose stung.

“…Hic.”

He tried to hold it in, but in the end, a sob escaped through his clenched teeth. As if that were a signal, his vision blurred and hot tears fell drop by drop.

“Actually, hic, it was incredibly hard. I wasn’t, sniff, ah, I wasn’t fine at all…”

Dan Yuha sobbed like a child, pouring out how much he had suffered. After becoming a wanted fugitive, he had never once been able to lie down and rest at ease.

It was a stroke of luck if he could sleep in an abandoned house—what more could be said?

Even then, he had to keep his nerves on edge even while sleeping, lest he be attacked by wild animals or bandits at any moment. So that he could flee at a moment’s notice.

Worn down by the fugitive life with no promise or hope, he would consider surrendering to the authorities or seeking out Shin Ryuwon, but whenever he saw the local soldiers checking people with descriptions of his appearance, fear would seize him and he would hurry away.

There were many times he felt like giving up everything. Some days, he would stand before a cliff and think about just dying. Dan Yuha’s mind had been pushed to the brink.