The Tyrant Won’t Let Me Go Chapter 134 - Side Story 18

 

Even though I knew Cedric’s mind was that of an adult, seeing his small body buried behind stacks of documents taller than his seated height made me feel inexplicably sorry for him.  

 

So I subtly pushed the cookies Paul had set aside for me toward Cedric.  

 

“Hm? No, I’m fine. You have them, Ciel.”  

 

“Do you need more tea? Should I call Paul?”  

 

“Ah, right. A bit more black tea—”  

 

I sharply cut him off.  

 

“No more black tea. Kids shouldn’t drink too much black tea, you know.”  

 

“…Huh?”  

 

Cedric blinked in confusion.  

 

“But it’s only for two days. I’ll be back to normal soon, so it’s fine, right?”  

 

“Regardless, you’re twelve right now. What’s not allowed isn’t allowed.”  

 

“But I’m so sleepy… If I don’t have tea, I’ll probably doze off.”  

 

Rubbing his eyes, Cedric sighed.  

 

“Then why don’t you take a short nap and continue later?”  

 

“Maybe that’s better. I don’t usually get sleepy at this hour—I wonder why.”  

 

As I watched him tiredly rubbing his eyes, I suddenly spread my arms toward him.  

 

“Come on, let’s get you to bed.”  

 

The moment he heard that, Cedric froze mid-rub.  

 

“Huh? What?”  

 

“I said, let’s go to bed. A short nap would do you good.”  

 

I stepped closer to where he sat in his chair.  

 

“I’ll carry you there, so let me hold you.”  

 

In an instant, Cedric’s face turned bright red.  

 

“W-Wait, Ciel?!”  

 

By the time the flustered Cedric regained his senses, he was already in my arms.  

 

‘If I leave him at his desk, he’ll stubbornly refuse to rest.’  

 

Whenever Cedric looked too exhausted while working, Paul and I would suggest he take a break before continuing.

 

Every time, Cedric would respond with ‘Maybe,’ but in the end, he never stopped working.  

 

There had been more than a few attempts to persuade Cedric, who was subtly stubborn like this, but most of those efforts ended in failure.  

 

‘But now that he’s sleepy and smaller, things might be different.’  

 

I planned to quickly move him to bed and put him to sleep while he was too drowsy to resist. It would have been impossible when he was an adult, but now that he was smaller, it should work.  

 

‘I just hope he doesn’t push himself too hard, even in this state.’  

 

Adjusting my hold to make sure Cedric wouldn’t slip, I thought to myself.  

 

“Hey, Ciel, are you really going to do this? I’m fine, really—I don’t need to sleep—”  

 

“Fine, you say? Your eyes are practically pouring sleep.”  

 

Holding Cedric, I stepped out into the hallway as I spoke.  

 

If others saw Cedric in his smaller form, it would undoubtedly cause confusion, so currently, only a few people, including Paul, had access to this area. The hallway was empty.  

 

“More importantly, why are you so flustered? Earlier, you outright asked me to carry you.”  

 

“Well, that’s…”  

 

Cedric, who had no choice but to wrap his arms around my neck, paused briefly before speaking again.  

 

“Asking for it and you doing it on your own feel different. Besides, you didn’t carry me earlier, so I didn’t think you’d do it now.”  

 

“Then should I put you down so you can walk instead?”  

 

I had no intention of actually letting him go, but Cedric’s reaction was amusing, so I teased him lightly.  

 

However, Cedric seemed to genuinely believe I would stop holding him, because the moment I finished speaking, he hugged me tighter and exclaimed,  

 

“No! I actually love this!”  

 

“How honest. Good boy.”  

 

Laughing, I patted his back lightly. Cedric flinched for a moment, then buried his face into my shoulder without another word.  

 

‘He’s embarrassed.’

 

As expected, Cedric’s body, cradled in my arms, was gradually growing warm. Though he seemed to be staying silent to avoid showing any signs of embarrassment, his entire body appeared to be betraying that very fact.  

 

Even when we reached the bedroom and I set him down on the bed, his face remained flushed red.  

 

“Here, rest for a bit. I’ll wake you up later, so don’t worry too much.”  

 

At that, Cedric blinked his large, ruby-like eyes.  

 

“I think all my sleep has run away.”  

 

“Just from being carried for a little while?”  

 

“No, Ciel. Listen—I’ve never been smaller than you before, so I’ve never been able to fit snugly in your arms like this. And—”  

 

He paused mid-sentence, slightly excited, and glanced at me briefly before sighing and forcing himself to continue.  

 

“Maybe it’s because of this child’s body, but even the smallest things seem to provoke an intense reaction…”  

 

Ah, right. That makes sense.  

 

‘Come to think of it, when we first met, even the smallest things would make him fluster easily.’  

 

As I reminisced about his younger days in my mind, I nodded and looked at him.  

 

“You really have become adorable.”  

 

“Then be a little more affectionate with me.”  

 

“I already carried you all the way to the bedroom because you were cute. Now you want me to spoil you even more?”  

 

“Yeah.”  

 

Cedric reached out his hand as he spoke.  

 

Interpreting the gesture as a request to hold hands, I extended my right hand toward him. His hands, which were usually large enough to completely envelop mine, were now so small that he had to use both just to barely grasp a single one of mine.  

 

“By the way, Ciel—do you have a lot of work left today?”  

 

“Not really. I just need to finish organizing the training records, and I already did most of it back in that room.”  

 

“Lucky you. As you know, I still have a lot left.”

 

Cedric placed my hand against his cheek and spoke. His voice, saying he was ‘envious,’ sounded like that of an elementary school student admiring a friend who had already finished their homework, and I couldn’t help but laugh.  

 

“Hey, Ciel, since you’ve mostly finished what you needed to do, won’t you take a nap with me?”  

 

Cedric fixed his clear red eyes on me as he asked.  

 

“I lost sleep earlier, but now I’m feeling a little drowsy again. If you sleep with me, I think I’ll be able to rest well.”  

 

Then, covering his mouth with his hand, he let out a small yawn.  

 

Tiny tears had formed in his beautiful crimson eyes from yawning, and my reflection was visible in them.  

 

After gazing into those eyes for a long while, I sat up and settled down beside Cedric, lying next to him.  

 

“You don’t have to give a reason. I would’ve slept beside you anyway, Your Majesty.”  

 

“Huh?”  

 

His red eyes widened slightly in surprise.  

 

“So, if you want something, you can just say it. You don’t need to explain—I’ll listen no matter what.”  

 

At twelve years old, Cedric carried many wounds from people, always worried that others might dislike him.  

 

Back then, it pained me to see him yearning for affection while desperately suppressing and enduring that desire.  

 

Even on the rare occasions when he did express that need, he always gave a reason.  

 

Like, ‘My hands are too cold—would you hold them for a little while?’

  

Even though a child shouldn’t need a reason to ask for love, he never made a request without one—not even to me, the closest person to him.  

 

Even though I was always ready to hold his hand, with or without an explanation.  

 

At least until he was fifteen—until we had fully grown accustomed to each other—Cedric remained like that.  

 

“Really?”  

 

Cedric spoke in a quiet voice and reached his arms out toward me.  

 

“Then, hug me again.”  

 

His arms stretched toward me as if it were the most natural thing in the world, and his eyes fixed solely on me.  

 

It was an unbearably endearing sight. It wasn’t just because his appearance had grown younger.  

 

The way he expressed love without hesitation, the way he asked me to love him—it filled me with satisfaction and affection.  

 

“Of course, gladly.”  

 

The small body burrowing into my embrace hugged me with all its might.  

 

As if he couldn’t contain the overwhelming joy of loving me so much.

 

💫

 

Time passed, and night fell.  

 

With the day’s work finished, I went to see the children with Cedric.  

 

“Hey, kids, have you been good?”  

 

At the sound of their names, Caspian and Ciana abruptly sat up in their crib.  

 

The two children began to smile when they saw me, but as soon as they noticed Cedric appearing behind me, their smiles vanished.