Toxin Chapter 2

“Go and change into this!”

“It’s still clean now. It’s going to get dirty again anyway…”

“But if your appearance isn’t neat, people will call you worthless!”

When I was told I had some work to do, the person I was happiest to hear that from was, of course, my mother. Not wanting to ruin that feeling, I put on a clean white shirt and left the house. Despite my mother’s objections, she followed me all the way to the outskirts of the village.

“Go there, don’t make mistakes, always be polite. You never know, maybe the nobleman in charge will take you to the capital?”

“There won’t be such a thing. There are many talented artists there much better than me.”

“Your father was a recognized painter at the Baedal office! You inherited his talent, so don’t let it go to waste. Anyway, if that gentleman helps you, you can live in a cleaner way away from this tiresome village. Don’t let those people mistreat you…”

My mother looked up at the clear blue sky with a heavy gaze.

“Should I just leave this village? We can find a place to live, you can continue drawing, and I can do some sewing…”

“Really…? Are you serious?”

“Yes! When have I ever lied?”

My mother hesitated and then spoke.

“And when you come back tonight, let’s give you a name!”

“…!”

I couldn’t believe my ears. If we named myself, there would soon be a visible mark, and it would only be a matter of time before others noticed. She might not know what would happen afterward…

“Mother, but…”

“If you want to leave, then leave! I’m at a point where I don’t care anymore! Is it reasonable for an eighteen-year-old not to have a name?”

My mother suddenly clenched her fist.

“And before you leave, let’s pour a bowl of dung water in every corner of our house, for all the troubles we’ve had over the years, definitely!”

“Yes.”

The whimsical idea from my mother made me burst into laughter, but I nodded eagerly. I knew, given my mother’s personality, that it wouldn’t just end with words. Despite enduring unfair treatment, my mother, who hadn’t been able to leave this place, saw it as a miraculous change. She was hoping to break free from the self-imposed barriers and leap into a new world. That’s how hungry my mother was for a little hope. The women heading to the laundry room shot us disdainful glances.

“Why are you looking at us with cat eyes? Are these women wanting another taste of excitement?”

“Look at this fierce woman! Still wandering around without coming to her senses? No wonder she probably devoured her husband…”

“Oh my! How about we strip off that tough woman’s scalp today, ladies?”

“Kyak…!”

As my mother rushed forward, the women recoiled, retreating their vulgar insults. After recovering my mother and sending her home, I headed towards Raonhilijo’s residence.

Passing through the yard, people and tax collectors glared at me with unfriendly eyes. What had changed as I frequented Raonhilijo’s residence was the overt harassment disappearing. Of course, I couldn’t openly resist now, but someday, I would surely be struck in the back with an axe hidden in the shadows…

Hurrying my steps, I thought about the person waiting for me.

***

“Do not move.”

“I haven’t been moving for a while now.”

“You moved. Please turn your head a bit more to the left.”

“Ha… it’s not as easy as it sounds…”

Raonhilijo had been faithfully complying with my requests not to move for a long time, but as the afternoon approached, his posture started to waver little by little. Drawing a portrait wasn’t easy for me after a long time, and it took two days just to sketch the outline. Today was the coloring stage, and dealing with the tough skin of an Ime made the portrayal of a healthy human complexion challenging.

It was already the third day since I accepted Raonhilijo’s proposal and started visiting this place. The herbs had run out, and the promised day with Orumun had passed, yet I hadn’t gone to the tent. The time I could draw Raonhilijo was limited to the time he stayed here. Though sitting all day long was quite tiring, it was good to be able to draw, and this time without seeing Orumun felt like a break.

My hair kept falling onto the paper, and as I casually tied it back, I felt Raonhilijo’s gaze from across. Not just now, but whenever I drew absentmindedly, the intense stare could make my brush stiffen involuntarily. However, it was different from discomfort or repulsion. When drawing a person, there were times when you inadvertently observed the subject, and at some point, you peeked into their inner self or the greed they harbored without them realizing it. However, with Raonhilijo, such impurity wasn’t visible. For quite a while, I held my gaze on his impressive black pupils. At that moment, a fresh scent, reminiscent of grass, wafted into my nose.

“Is this really how I look?”

It was a sudden, dropped voice. As I lifted my head, I saw Raonhilijo sitting still. He wore a silk robe that looked comfortable today, contrasting with an atmosphere that seemed as if he would only read books, yet his body appeared sturdy.

“Please sit down. If your posture keeps shifting, it will take much longer.”

“Take a break for a moment. You must be tired too, like me.”

His words echoed my thoughts; I had been sitting in the same position for a long time, and my entire body was aching.

“To do this kind of strange thing with faces…”

Glancing at his abrupt remark, Raonhilijo made a peculiar expression.

“I asked you to draw my face. It’s like scratching an itch, if you will.”

“At first, everyone feels awkward, but you’ll get used to it soon.”

“It’s been three days; it should be enough time to get used to it, but I’m still not comfortable.”

He seemed to have changed his mind, playing with the brush.

“If you’re not comfortable, you can stop.”

“It’s not that I’m uncomfortable; it’s just my face is warm.”

It happened when someone stared at your face intensely. It was when I straightened my back, tapping my numb legs.

“But you still don’t have a name?”

His sudden question made my hand pause. The word ‘still’ particularly caught my ear. It sounded as if he already knew me, someone who had been living without a name. Come to think of it, it was customary to inquire about the other person, especially here. Since I arrived, he hadn’t asked anything about me – not my name, not where I lived, nor why I looked different from other Imes…

“No. I don’t have one.”

“I see. Oh, does Ime have a peculiar naming ceremony? I’ve never seen it myself, but engraving a name on the pupil is a truly unusual case. It’s mysterious…”

“Yes.” Not having any specific words to respond, I absentmindedly played with the brush, and a long sigh escaped from my lips.

“You really are a man of few words. Your personality can make the other person quite awkward, aside from the aggressive language and offensive remarks.”

Apart from the relentless insults and offensive language, this was the first time I had received such an evaluation about myself, and impulsively, I opened my mouth.

“I’m sorry.”

Raonhilijo’s expression was one of surprise.

“You were surprised that I seemed that way? No, you were surprised that you thought of me that way.”

And behind the surprise… Yes, if it wasn’t a misconception, what was contained in that face was unexpected joy. However, the truly surprising thing was me. He probably couldn’t guess how much the small suggestion he made had brought such a significant change to our lives, how it had brought an immense sense of hope. If I were to express gratitude for giving me work, what kind of expression would he make? If he were to suggest that I might get a name today, what would he say…?

“Well then, I will draw again. Please sit…”

“Oh, okay. I got it. I got it…”

He sighed and muttered. To draw again, he unfolded the paper. However, just when I thought he had naturally returned to his seat, Raonhilijo, who had been standing, suddenly brushed the hair falling on my eyes with his fingers.

“You don’t have to hide it when I’m around.”

“…!”

I froze at the unexpected action. As his fingers touched my forehead, it felt strange. It was different from the disgust or stickiness that Orumun provided. What could it be…? Perhaps it’s different… If not, I couldn’t imagine such a clear scent of grass coming from him. Still caught in an invisible itch, I found myself unconsciously biting my lips. The smile on his lips gradually faded.

“I have to return to the capital for my duties as the Black Sky Emperor today.”

“Yes.”

I knew. I never thought he would stay here forever.

“Let’s finish the rest next time.”

“Yes.”

I was on the verge of asking impulsively when that time would come. I added meaningless strokes to Raonhilijo’s eyes on the canvas. My hand movements were noticeably slower than a moment ago. He, who had been standing still, turned his body.

After finishing his work and bidding me farewell, Raonhilijo left the village with the group. The miracle my mother hoped for didn’t happen, and my break came to an end today.

Around the time the pale moon hung over the mountain, I walked towards home, stepping on damp grass. The unfinished painting in my hand somehow felt heavy. Should I pretend to work for a while…? As I recalled my mother’s expression today, my chest felt heavy. While wandering aimlessly through the alley, I passed by the Chief’s house. A young couple was visible through the gate. They held a bundle of joy in their arms, and before them stood the Chief with a clean beard.

“We brought him as soon as it’s been three days since he was born. If the Chief gives him a name, we will have no wishes left!”

“Even so, wouldn’t it be better for the parents who gave birth to name him?”

“No, Chief! If it weren’t for you when I was taken away by the Baedal office, I would have already lost my life. If you just name my daughter, I will carry her in my arms and live with her for the rest of my life!”

“But what if my only granddaughter ends up tying the knot with an old man like me?”

“Oh, in that case, it would be our honor! Please treat her like your own granddaughter! Hahaha…!”

The Chief chuckled at the man’s flattery and brushed his beard. Naming a newborn life was a unique symbol of the tribe, and it was one of the important ceremonies where the child received meaning. Unlike his son, the Ime Chief received occasional requests like this with his gentle demeanor.

“Whether it’s true or not, we’re fine. Chief. So, please, if you could just give her a name, we have no other wishes. Please.”

“Hmm. A girl, a girl…”

At the man’s earnest request, the Chief looked at the peacefully sleeping newborn. Then, placing his hand on the baby’s forehead, he spoke.

“I will give you a unique name. Be a child who brightens the world like a candle, and I’ll name you Choa.”

In an instant, a radiant and iridescent energy enveloped the baby’s body, infiltrating into the red pupils. Whether it was painful or the light that captivated my body was terrifying, the baby cried loudly, soaked in wonder. After observing their private ceremony for a while, I resumed walking.

I sometimes wondered what it would feel like to get a name. During my naive childhood, I envied my peers whose eyes bore names. I often begged my mother to name me. Each time, my mother played a prank, writing on my eyelids with a brush and then quietly crying alone in her room. After that, I stopped bothering my mother about it.

However, today, a name is coming to me too. A name… What could it be…? Although my mother remained tight-lipped, claiming it’s a secret until the end, the anticipation was real. My steps involuntarily quickened.

With that, I left the village and headed into the pitch-dark forest. As I approached the edge of the forest path, I instinctively hid behind a tree upon hearing some movement. Irritated with myself for avoiding eyes like this, I was about to move forward impulsively when, unexpectedly, I spotted a completely different species this time, deeply concealed behind the trees. It was dark, and I couldn’t be certain, but there seemed to be about four of them. Behind them, about nine individuals stood in a formation, clad in strange armor. Suspicion grew as to why they were here at this hour. Then a voice from an unfamiliar person shattered the silence.

“About four thousand at least. The tribe seems larger than it looks, but it should be enough by tonight.”

It was quite a distance, and I had to completely block out the surrounding noise to hear it clearly. I strained my ears.

“Commander. During the Gornaru Duel, you boasted confidently, and it didn’t even take two full days, did it?”

“I may not know about other things, but if it’s about knocking you down, tonight should be more than enough. Why don’t you keep babbling on?”

After snorting, the man turned his gaze to the man standing at the center of them.

“Your Majesty, you’ve just finished a war not long ago, and you must be tired. Moreover, isn’t the celebration more boring without the hero?”

Amidst the stillness of the Parisian night air, the figure standing silently in the middle slowly raised its head. It was like savoring the essence of the moon, a leisurely movement. Although the cold moonlight settled on his facial features, the deeper darkness concealed everything.

“On a night like tonight, tasting blood is better.”

It was a voice that spread like deep, flowing water. However, it was low and dense, more chilling than the cool night air. Another man beside him shrugged his shoulders.

“If that’s the case, it’s better for you to watch from afar. Commander, your exaggeration aside, with this scale, it should be enough for us in Gaya and Yama.”

“Ignoring a small tribe could be troublesome. Their cohesion is remarkable. It might become a nuisance to me in the future.”

The voice, filled with an oddly precarious tone, momentarily disappeared before reappearing.

“But what annoys me the most is the red eyes and horns. And that smell, it’s so disgusting that it twists my insides.”

Automatically, my hearing sharpened. If it’s red eyes and horns… Could they be referring to Ime…? My heart pounded fiercely.

“I want to test its power today.”

There was something sparkling silver in the man’s hand. It was shaped like a long cylinder, but it had sleek lines and was the first time I had seen such an object, and it looked dangerous somehow. However, the most dangerous thing seemed to be the man himself. Even without listening anymore, it was clear that ominous muttering was going on. I stifled my steps, suppressing the sound of my footsteps.

Someone had to be informed. Although this place had taught me only hatred and anger, the truth was, if not here, there was nowhere else to go. In the dark village, not even a single mouse seemed to be visible today. It was a moment when I was about to rush to the chief’s place, recalling the chief I had seen a while ago. Suddenly, someone jutting out interfered with my rush. Soon after, a long arm like a snake coiled around my upper body from behind.

“Where are you so busy going? Pretty one?”

It was a voice that made my body shiver every time. Greasy eyes glinted in the darkness. Oromun forcefully pulled me into a secluded place.

“Let go. This is not the time… Ugh…!”

“Shut up! You dirty mongrel…!”

A thick hand fiercely struck my face. In the moment my body was thrown far away, intense pain struck my back and shoulders. This time, a venomous hand wound around my hair, penetrating the searing pain into my skull.

“It seems like you’ve been lingering around Raonhiljo’s house all this time, avoiding me, right? Are you planning to offer yourself to him now? You filthy mongrel!”

“What nonsense are you talking about? No, in the village square right now… Ugh…!”

“Throwing provocations like that, intending to devour all the men?! If you want to get away from my hand, you better be ready to become a servant!”

A horrific beating began. Oromun ruthlessly trampled on my waist and spine. As the taste of blood permeated my mouth, the damp palate invaded. With disgusting breaths, Oromun twisted my pants off my waist, exposing my bare feet.

“You filthy mongrel…! How does it feel to die enjoying this chewy hole that Raonhiljo likes so much?! Do you want me to shake you like a madman?!”

“Let go…! You idiot…! Right now… in the forest…!”

“Shut up…!”

Rampant, he struck a fist to my face and swung his shoulder. He widened my legs and brutally continued his ruthless pummeling. Breath caught in my throat as if my organs were about to burst. Limbs that swayed like a ragdoll went limp as consciousness was completely severed.