Kill Your X Chapter 31

“What? No, what did you say?”

“I’m asking if you have someone to relieve your arousal.”

My expression hardened. Aggressive words, unlike my usual carefully managed image, tumbled out.

“Why are you asking that? Do you still think I like men? Because I secretly looked at that kind of book?”

“Whether you like women or men, that’s your business, Sunbae.”

It was unclear what we were even talking about.

“Yeonho, what you just said is sexual harassment. You know that, right?”

“If you don’t have anyone, relieve yourself often. If someone like Sunbae keeps accumulating desire like that, it’s perfect for evil spirits to latch on.”

The emotion that was about to explode into anger abruptly shifted direction because of one word he said.

“Evil spirits?”

Si Yeonho wiggled his eyebrows as if only now understanding, despite his cryptic words.

“Evil spirits that usually don’t attach to ordinary people are swarming around Sunbae right now. You might have been okay so far, but in this state, it wouldn’t be strange if an accident happened anytime, anywhere.”

“Hey, why are you being so creepy?”

I couldn’t control my expression at the sudden talk of ghosts. Si Yeonho seemed too serious for it to be a simple joke.

“If you want to live, listen to me.”

Si Yeonho stood up first. Lost in thought, I even forgot to ask for his phone number. My head was overloaded with the sudden influx of information.

“Evil spirits, desire?”

Si Yeonho, could he see ghosts? If that’s why he doesn’t come to school often…

There are rumors, though unfounded, about schools being intentionally built on places filled with negative energy. Supposedly, only children overflowing with positive energy can suppress that energy.

Even so, it seems like it wasn’t a perfect solution, as I’d vaguely heard stories about various ghosts in the school.

“Evil spirits, why would there be such things around me?”

I can honestly say I’ve never done anything bad in my life. I’ve always been well-behaved, without even the small mishaps common among my classmates. My only flaw and secret was that I liked men.

Even that, I’d never revealed since realizing it in middle school. My father would beat me to death if he knew, so why would I go around blabbing about it?

I don’t know how I managed to get through my academy class that day. By the time I got home after my packed private education schedule, I was completely exhausted.

“Our son, are you having a hard time studying for the exams? You look so pale.”

My mother, who had waited up for me, hugged me tightly. Mumbling that I was just tired, I casually brought up the topic.

“Mom, I heard the kids at the academy talking about something strange today.”

“Something strange?”

“Well, they say a lot of people are using shamanistic rituals or talismans for exam takers these days. Because they suppress all their desires to play and have fun and only study, their energy weakens, and evil spirits latch on…”

I fabricated a story based on what Si Yeonho had said. I didn’t know if talismans for exam takers actually existed, but since this country is obsessed with education, making one up wouldn’t be a problem.

“You shouldn’t say such things, a child who goes to church.”

“I just thought it was interesting. My friend’s mother goes to a temple.”

“Even if such things exist, Gyujin, you have nothing to worry about. Do you know how much Mom and Dad pray for you? With our family’s devotion, evil spirits can’t even come close.”

As someone who was unilaterally dragged to church according to my parents’ wishes, all that talk sounded the same to me.

Curious about whether I really had a constitution that attracted ghosts, I discarded my curiosity when my mother took my hand right there and then and prayed. Everyone has one or two areas of blind faith. I calmed my anxious heart by telling myself that Si Yeonho must be the same.

Then, accidents happened one after another. Witnessing the seemingly unrelated series of events, I recalled Si Yeonho’s words. If not for that, it was all just incomprehensible.

✽✽✽

“Gasp!”

I almost fainted again as soon as I opened my eyes. An unfamiliar ceiling filled my vision. I sat up abruptly and looked around. The space I woke up in was too luxurious to be a motel and too homey to be a hotel. But it also seemed to lack something to be a proper home.

A model house. After a while, my sluggish mind finally produced a somewhat appropriate word.

Where am I? I remember blindly following the address Si Yeonho gave me. The door was open, so I went in, and it was a shaman’s house, and then I was drawn into the next room as if possessed…

“Sunbae.”

“Ah!”

I flinched and clutched my chest. I was embarrassed by my involuntary reaction. Si Yeonho, who had entered the room, handed me a large mug. My face was reflected in the steaming liquid. I sighed at my awful complexion.

“Is honey water the only drink you know how to make?”

It might be my imagination, but it seems to be getting sweeter compared to the first time he gave it to me.

“I thought you liked it.”

“If I had to choose between liking it and not liking it, I like it, but honey water isn’t barley tea. How can I drink it every day?”

Grumbling, I took a sip of the warm drink. After a few more sips, I finally regained my lost composure.

Even though there was a chair near the bed, Si Yeonho just stood there, keeping a slight distance from me. I fiddled with the blanket, which looked like a freshly unwrapped new product, and finally spoke.

“I went to your house.”

“I know. And you stopped by my company before that.”

As expected, it seemed the report that I had come looking for Si Yeonho had reached his ears. It was something I had done with the thought that it wouldn’t matter if he found out anyway.

“Aren’t you angry? You didn’t ask for my permission to go to my house, let alone my company. You even trespassed.”

“It’s okay.”

I gestured to him, anticipating a longer conversation. Si Yeonho sat on the edge of the bed and met my eyes. He didn’t look exactly confident, but he didn’t seem to have anything to hide. His unwavering gaze hadn’t changed since we first met.

Maybe it was best to pretend I didn’t know anything and part ways at the right time, as originally planned. Whatever the truth, he was a shady character, and throwing a straight ball here could put me in unnecessary danger.

But I wanted to hear it from him directly. I couldn’t help but cling to a small, lingering hope. Pathetically so.

“Do you remember the day I first went to your company a few days ago? I went without telling you, and you were out on business, so I didn’t see you.”

“I remember.”

“I met a high school classmate that day.”

Even now, Si Yeonho didn’t show any signs of having his secret exposed. The silence in the room suddenly felt heavy. I opened my mouth as if defying gravity. It was irresistible.

“He knows a lot of people, both classmates and upper and lowerclassmen. While we were eating, your name came up.”

Si Yeonho’s head tilted slightly to the side. He seemed to be listening intently, or perhaps belatedly annoyed.

“He, Taehoon, said something strange.”

My mouth kept getting dry, so I reached for the mug on the nightstand. I just hoped he wouldn’t notice the trembling of my hand holding the cup.

“Something strange.”

It was shocking to hear it from someone else, but saying it myself felt like I was delivering a death sentence to him. My chest heaved as my breath quickened.

“He said you’re dead.”

“…….”

“He said you committed suicide by jumping from the school roof. Not long after I graduated, ugh!”

He suddenly approached, and thinking he was going to hit me, I covered my face with my arm. There was no physical impact, and Si Yeonho took the mug from my other hand. Some of the honey water had splashed on the blanket during the commotion. The sweet scent felt out of place in the situation.

“I was worried you’d get hurt. Your hand was shaking so much.”

Si Yeonho placed the cup out of my reach. It was a considerate gesture, as always, but I couldn’t take his kindness at face value anymore. Now that I’d opened the floodgates this much, he must have realized my intentions.

“Yeonho.”

He never spoke first, but he always answered my questions. I clung to that.

“Yes.”

“Don’t you have anything to say to me?”

Si Yeonho, who was looking at me with his characteristic jet-black eyes, slightly lifted the corners of his mouth. The time it took him to blink his doll-like, thick eyelashes felt like an eternity.

“Sunbae.”

I told myself not to be too surprised, no matter how shocking the truth, and waited for his explanation. But Si Yeonho, instead, asked me a question.

“Have you checked the death certificate?”

“What?”

“You said Si Yeonho is dead. Did you check the documents?”

“Uh… not yet.”

“Check it. See if it says I’m dead.”

His confidence left me speechless. The new information I’d uncovered while investigating him, the strange environment I’d seen at his house, all felt like an illusion.

“Why are you making that face?”

I belatedly realized he was slightly angry.

“I don’t understand. Taehoon, my friend, isn’t the type to lie. And he’s definitely not the type to spread vicious rumors about someone’s death.”

“Not everyone dies from falling off a roof.”

Si Yeonho rotated his head, loosening his neck muscles. It was a languid movement, like a predator stretching.

“They can get seriously injured, though. Or suffer permanent aftereffects.”

“So, what you’re saying is…”

“Si Yeonho is alive. Your friend must have been mistaken. I haven’t been to school since then.”

I realized the source of the subtle unease I’d been feeling. Si Yeonho was talking about his own life as if it belonged to a third party.

However, considering that the name Si Yeonho actually appeared on the list of KNT Entertainment directors, and listening to his story, I thought the rumor of his death might actually be false. If so, I’d committed the rudeness of treating a living person as dead.